Diaper Party?

GinnyJohn

Yes or No...

Unknown

This content has been removed.

janda426

No, you don't tell people what to buy you

lalaroller08

I dunno, some people might be into it...

stepherly

No

hydrangeablue

I say no. I'm going to subscribe and save diapers on Amazon so I don't have to deal with storing tons of boxes. Yes, we'll keep some extra but I want to buy the brand I like in the size baby needs as he/she needs it. Plus, who wants to buy someone diapers? It's like buying toilet paper...

Skrittens

I say no. I always have a budget in mind when I purchase a gift - but almost every time I have went above it because I saw something special on a registry or went overboard shopping for just cuteness. When I go to something that has a specific gift theme, I feel limited in my gift giving abilities and stick pretty strictly to my budget. So...I say no...people will get you what they want if they want to - I love I buy gifts and am usually more generous when I get to chose - even off of a registry.

I would just be thrilled to pieces if someone threw me a party - and receiving gifts would be a bonus - greatly appreciated but not expected.

stine28

GinnyJohn said:

Yes or No...

No.

[Seriously? The best you could do was a 3-word post? Unless you were looking for 1-word answers, and I assume my response isn't cutting it for you, why not contribute a little to the community and write a proper post? You may as well have just asked google with the level of detail you've given us.]

LBeez13

I know most people say no but my husband has gone to 2 or 3 of these parties and he actually likes them.

Most of the parties are low key and say something like bring a case of diapers and a case of beer and watch some football.

My husband never knows what to buy for his friends so this is perfect for him. Beer, football and a gift for his friend having a baby.

uneek1323

Engineer81

No. Unless of course you are not going to have a baby shower. Otherwise you are double dipping by having your friends and family feel pressured to by you two gifts for the two parties. And if you like these people, do you really want to do that to them?

uneek1323

Engineer81 said:

No. Unless of course you are not going to have a baby shower. Otherwise you are double dipping by having your friends and family feel pressured to by you two gifts for the two parties. And if you like these people, do you really want to do that to them?

Still a no. 

Engineer81

uneek1323 said:

Engineer81 said:

No. Unless of course you are not going to have a baby shower. Otherwise you are double dipping by having your friends and family feel pressured to by you two gifts for the two parties. And if you like these people, do you really want to do that to them?

Still a no. 

I agree, it's still a no because it's tacky as hell. I was just trying to drive home the point that you can't expect your friends to fund your kid and that you don't get multiple parties.

Ardmhs83

No...when I see that on an invitation it makes my head spin!  I've actually seen, all on one invitation, someone requesting a book instead of a card, diapers and then they expect another gift?! That is three damn gifts...I'm too broke for all that.  Let people look at a registry and get what they want to get...it is their money.  

crunchymamaof2

Mama0216 said:

There have been SO many shower posts and about how they're attention whoreish and the whole nine yards... which is an opinion and I respect it truly (and AGREE WITH EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING that you should NEVER ask for a shower or host one of your own, BTW).  In the midst of all of these no's I say yes about diaper showers!  I am hosting a shower for a girlfriend of mine (second child, to add fuel to any fires that this may start) because we are so thrilled for their new baby.  It is customary in our group of friends to have a shower for all babies (aren't the second, third, etc. babies just as special and worth getting together to celebrate as the first?).  I am of the opinion that a baby is one of the greatest things to celebrate there is.  Traditionally you call it a shower (which carries such a stigma, apparently), while we all consider it a celebration and party. 

Second showers are always planned as being easy, laid back, coed party style showers.  No registries and no gifts are EVER required or suggested.  Some people bring one, some don't.  There's no ceremonial opening of the gifts.  It's a PARTY.  For the shower I am hosting, when asked what gift people could buy for my guest of honor, diapers are given as a suggestion. It's not forcing anyone to bring a gift, or diapers, but gives us all a chance to get together as a group, share some good food and company, and celebrate the wonderful event that is this pregnancy.

I am apparently of the small minority on this board (as are all of my friends and family members in multiple states as well) that feel like WHEN OFFERED a second "shower" (which is really more in line of a celebratory party) is perfectly fine. And moreover, if people want to bring a gift they will. If they don't they won't.  Don't rain on a person's parade for their generosity.  If guests ask for suggestions, diapers (as are casseroles for the freezer, etc.) are a very practical gift to give, in my humble opinion. 

No, no, and no.

1. Showers are to welcome a woman into motherhood. If you want to celebrate baby, have a meet and greet/sip and see/BBQ/Christmas party/whatever AFTER baby actually arrives.

2. Showers are gift giving events. It doesn't matter if you say "no gifts" (also rude, btw), or don't include registry info. People feel obligated to buy a gift for a shower. 

3. Politely declining a subsequent shower (or a first for that matter) is not rude. "Raining of a person's parade for their generosity"? Really? "I really appreciate the offer I'm just not comfortable with another shower." If that rains on your parade then you need a hobby.

kmvisioli

I'm with @LBeez13‌ - my H and his buddies did a diaper and beer party for a dad-to-be while the ladies were at the baby shower, and they had a great time. It let the guys celebrate and support in a way they actually enjoyed, and they didn't have to figure out baby gifts.

I have considered, though, that you may not know which diapers you actually want or need, which could result in some annoying returns/exchanges. BUT then you have some options of brands to try and get to do the trial and error without spending tons of your own money.

@Mama0216‌ - I think a little celebration is perfectly fine, if that's the tradition your friends and family have and love! I went to a "sprinkle" for a second baby, and it was great. It was for a little girl, and her first was a boy, so there was lots of excitement for her. In that particular case it was also mostly new friends celebrating with her because she lived in a new town.

Disneygeek77

No, I wouldn't as I know I wouldn't appreciate being told how to spend my own money.  I especially wouldn't feel comfortable spending money on a gift that will literally go in the trash.

chucktgirl

YES! If your DH wants a Diaper Party and someone volunteers to throw him one, go for it. In our expanded group of friends, a diaper party is pretty standard, and the guys actually look forward to it. It's a great excuse for them to get together and drink beer, and congratulate the new Dad. The diapers are really secondary. If you can use some of them, then great; if not, then donate. The guys usually buy the diapers themselves, so it's a mish-mash collection for sure. But it's the same as them bringing a random six-pack for the host of a Sunday Funday. It doesn't really matter what kind of beer they brought - it's just the gesture. If anyone doesn't want to attend, they don't have to. Have fun. Enjoy it all. And let hubby get a little fun night for himself.

janda426

It's so strange to me how many feel they can't celebrate a child without spending money on the child's mother.

jpavenski

I think it honestly depends on your family & your friends. Like I have said before in my close circle of friends everytime one of us has a baby we usually each buy the baby something after they come, so if I was invited to one for a close friend then they would just get the gift earlier at something like that. But I do think it's a bit much to go crazy inviting just aquantinces & expect gifts or diapers.

kcbizme

One of my good friends is throwing me a shower. I told her A) I don't expect anyone to throw a shower for me and I don't expect people to buy me things. I'm seriously considering asking her if we can change the title to party instead of shower so people won't necessarily feel obligated to buy something for it. Like PP said, "shower" practically insinuates that you expect people to buy things for you. That is not my expectation at all.

LBeez13

@mandJS In my husbands situation, they were more like, hey we all get together anyway for football and beer and we all want to do this for the new dad so lets bring a case of beer and a case of diapers. It wasn't a requirement from the soon to be dad, the guys just decided to bring both cases to show the soon to be dad some support. My husband likes it because he wants to be supportive and give a gift but he doesn't have to think much when it is just a pack of diapers.

Also--I know a lot of people keep saying things about having the wrong diapers but target, costco, walmart and our local grocery store all returned/exchanged diapers without a receipt for me. (we did not have a diaper party but my mom is crazy and bought us a bunch of diapers every month I was pregnant haha).

LBeez13

@mandjs I agree. The expectation makes it tacky.

chucktgirl

MandJS said:

chucktgirl said:

YES! If your DH wants a Diaper Party and someone volunteers to throw him one, go for it. In our expanded group of friends, a diaper party is pretty standard, and the guys actually look forward to it. It's a great excuse for them to get together and drink beer, and congratulate the new Dad. The diapers are really secondary. If you can use some of them, then great; if not, then donate. The guys usually buy the diapers themselves, so it's a mish-mash collection for sure. But it's the same as them bringing a random six-pack for the host of a Sunday Funday. It doesn't really matter what kind of beer they brought - it's just the gesture. If anyone doesn't want to attend, they don't have to. Have fun. Enjoy it all. And let hubby get a little fun night for himself.

Repeating my prior question.

WHY can't the guys get together WITHOUT buying you crap? Please explain. If they WANT to bring them, they are certainly welcome to buy you stuff, but WHY would you require it?

To answer your questions: Yes, guys can get together without buying gifts. AND guys can also get together AND bring gifts. No gifts are EVER required at any event. You can attend a birthday party and not bring a gift. You can attend a wedding and not bring a gift. It happens often. No one is standing at the door requiring a gift before you're allowed inside. Same thing happens at our local diaper parties. Those who want to bring diapers do so. Those who don't, typically just bring beer. No one cares. It's not required. It's simply for fun. If someone is offended by the tradition, then they can simply opt out, and not attend. Easy peasey. Calling it a diaper party is a great reason to get the guys together. Sometimes, for a lot of guys, they can get out of the house a lot easier by saying they have an event to attend, rather than "I'm going to go drink beer with the guys." That's not an issue in my house, but it is for several of my friends. Parties are fun. Theme parties are more fun. That's the bottom line. Hope this helps you understand WHY.

janda426

I'm really tempted to text my H right now and ask him what he thinks about a male diaper party. I'm really interested in his reaction lol

kellbell1982

I just asked my h and his facial response was hilarious

Disneygeek77

MandJS said:

happymamax2 said:

You do not ask a bunch of women on the internet. Unless you are considering inviting all of us to your diaper party? You ask YOUR RL friends! You ask them to be honest and what they think, they are the ones who will be involved, not us! It's different for your own life and family. The comments are valid points, but we are not involved in your real life, so don't ask us.

A polite friend, if asked to attend, is also not going to point out the tacky to someone's face.

Yeah, you would be putting your friend in an awkward situation by asking them that as most people will say it's ok even if they didn't think so.

I honestly think that asking internet strangers is better as they will tell you what they really think.

OP, as you can clearly see, the opinions are mixed.  That is why I believe it is better to err on the side of caution and not do it at all.

djoliet

I don't know bout y'all but most of my family are those Mexicans that show up to a party I.e. birthday, baby shower,diaper party, wedding, etc. without a gift and come ready to eat and drink (yes I said drink haha). Its okay with me though. I don't mind just their company.

crunchymamaof2

How is bringing a pack of diapers the same as bringing beer? Everyone benefits from the beer. Only one benefits from the diapers. Unless it's the type of party where the guys sit and drink beer while wearing diapers of course.

janda426

crunchymamaof2 said:

How is bringing a pack of diapers the same as bringing beer? Everyone benefits from the beer. Only one benefits from the diapers. Unless it's the type of party where the guys sit and drink beer while wearing diapers of course.

Also unless you're getting like a sample size pack of diapers a 6 pack costs way less.

crunchymamaof2

happymamax2 said:

How is bringing a pack of diapers the same as bringing beer? Everyone benefits from the beer. Only one benefits from the diapers. Unless it's the type of party where the guys sit and drink beer while wearing diapers of course.

Now, THAT'S what I call a party!!!

FrecklesInside

djoliet said:

I don't know bout y'all but most of my family are those Mexicans that show up to a party I.e. birthday, baby shower,diaper party, wedding, etc. without a gift and come ready to eat and drink (yes I said drink haha). Its okay with me though. I don't mind just their company.

OK. This is random.

To the OP. No.

djoliet

How it relates to the post is that I'm saying I'm okay with having parties without expecting to get gifts out of it. Id rather just have family and friends get together and celebrate and I'm okay with not getting presents out of it. So if someone does throw me a shower, which I'm not expecting at all or my fiancée a diaper party its likely we won't get many gifts from family and that's totally okay with me

kmvisioli

Maybe I misunderstood that someone was talking about throwing their own shower or party? The deal my husband went to was a pretty casual "hey, how about we hang out while the girls are at the shower" type thing, and the friends all bought diapers because they wanted to bring some sort of gift. There weren't actual invitations and the dad-to-be definitely didn't do anything but get invited to hang out.

I think people are allowed to celebrate in ways they want, which shouldn't really incite hostility from random internet strangers...If you don't want to bring a gift to something, don't. If you don't want to participate in someone's shower/party/whatever, just don't.

colleen4019

FrecklesInside said:

djoliet said:

I don't know bout y'all but most of my family are those Mexicans that show up to a party I.e. birthday, baby shower,diaper party, wedding, etc. without a gift and come ready to eat and drink (yes I said drink haha). Its okay with me though. I don't mind just their company.

OK. This is random.

To the OP. No.

I re-read like 3 times and still don't understand what that said?

stepherly

crunchymamaof2 said:

happymamax2 said:

crunchymamaof2 said:

How is bringing a pack of diapers the same as bringing beer? Everyone benefits from the beer. Only one benefits from the diapers. Unless it's the type of party where the guys sit and drink beer while wearing diapers of course.

Now, THAT'S what I call a party!!!

If my SO even heard the words "diaper party" I'm sure this is exactly what he'd imagine.