January 2015 Moms

UO Thursday - 7/24

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Re: UO Thursday - 7/24

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  • When people call babies sexy. I have too many Facebook friends who post pictures of babies and caption it "look at my sexy man" "check out my sexy girl"

    Umm NO... You're baby is not sexy. There is nothing sexy about a baby.

    Wait what? This is a thing?
  • My UO is that I think it's silly to make your husband spend the night with you in the hospital after you've had the baby. Why should both of you have poor sleeps if at least one of you can rest? I've seen friends who made their husbands spend the night and then they're both miserable and sleep deprived. Wait until you're home to both be miserable and sleep deprived!
    Really! We had no nursery in our hospital, i wanted my husband to stay, i hadent slept in 24 hours once i'd had him. Nope he was forced to leave, i was on my own with baby, finally pleaded to a nurse that she had to take him because i was going to drop him literally. I would have happily had two sleep deprived parents, not like it changed when we went home either, my baby only slept in 3hr shifts until maybe 6 months.. 


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  • jennkg3jennkg3 member
    edited July 2014
    jennkg3 said:
    @excitedmama2 I was against meds for me because I'm terrified of needles and I'm freaked out by some of the complications that can arise from an epidural, all selfish for me not the baby. I just figured again it's one day. I ran a few marathons before I had kids and just am of the mentality of this too shall pass and it does. However, I'm not saying I would never use anything if it was too much that I couldn't handle it, I just wanted to do everything I could to avoid it. This has nothing to do with birth experience or anything just my own fears.
    I am just joining this thread but I hope someone else addressed this. What crust!

    I only meant this in a way of I'm not trying to be a hero or anything else I just don't like needles, I guess not selfish as much as it's because of me that I don't want an epidural not because I think my baby and I won't bond or any of those reasons people use it's strictly because I don't like needles or want to risk all the complications.   

    Like I said above, I wouldn't say never if it's needed I will do it.

    LOUD NOISES!

    K- born 7/5/2011

    G- born 6/24/2013

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  • ACH831 said:

    My UO today is totally NBR.

    I friggin HATE umbrellas.  I think they are useless and ineffective (especially when it's windy!).  I also hate how many of the people who use them seem to lose all common sense and courtesy when doing so.  I can't tell you how many times I've almost had my eye taken out by some oblivious fool wielding a hideously oversized umbrella while walking down a crowded city street.  

    Give me a raincoat and a baseball cap and I'm good to go.

    That is the Seattle way. :)


    I miss Seattle.
  • I don't understand why anyone would want to send their baby to the nursery in the hospital. My son stayed with us except for two hours - his circumcision and his discharge evaluation. I was on such a rush, though, after I had him. So glad to meet him and anxious to spend every moment possible with him. I also wanted to establish a strong nursing relationship.

    Where I worked, I was not a fan of the nursery (also where I birthed and will birth again.) Babies would be crying in their bassinet or the mamma-roo for a while before a nurse would do anything, and the first response was usually a pacifier and/or some sugar water on the pacifier. Whenever my son cried in the hospital, it was attended to immediately. He just went through a very traumatic experience and was adjusting to a very new way of life - how could I not be there for him?

    My husband stayed the night in the hospital, but had to.go back to work the day after our son was born (brand new job after being laid off midway through the pregnancy.)
  • My husband spent the night with me the first night but then he did go home to sleep the other nights. I insisted-- our house is less than 10 minutes from our hospital. He'd stay until about 10 or 11 p.m. Go home. Sleep. I'd call him once Nora and I were up in the morning. He'd get up, shower, and come stay with us for the entire day unless it was to run home and let the dogs out, grab us some food, or go home at bed time. 

    We'll do the same this time since we have DD now. I want to disrupt her routine as little as possible, though my best friend did say she could stay at her house if we would like, so I'm sure we'll take her up on that offer for the first night. 

    I also used the nursery last time, but I kind of regret that. I'll keep the baby with me this time. 
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    Our sweet girl is 3!


    Lilypie - (R7Ux)


  • gah I cringe when I hear of newborns given pacifiers when the mother wants to breastfeed. I have heard from a number of people whose baby got a pacifier without the parents even being asked about it. *something to put in the birth plan*
  • None of my babies went to the nursery. It was offered with DS 2 (in Germany) so I could get some sleep. I refused because I want my baby with me. It was offered Shaun with DS3 because of my epidural headache and lack of sleep I had in 3 days. I refused again. My husband stayed the whole time with me, which was a huge help! I didn't ask him, he wanted to. He'll do it again this time if he's allowed.
    It was nice just the 3 of us bonding and getting to know our new baby.

    My friend was in nursing school and age told me when she was in l&d in the nursery they'd just let the babies cry. It was quiet and nothing going on and they just sat in their chairs.

    She got so bothered by it she'd go pick up the babies and ask to feed them.

    Here, the nursing student was doing the job of these nurses who did nothing.

    That was a reason why I didn't want my baby in the nursery.

    Nothing against using it, if you want and need it though. Mama's gotta do what they gotta do.
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  • thompnia said:

    I don't understand why anyone would want to send their baby to the nursery in the hospital. My son stayed with us except for two hours - his circumcision and his discharge evaluation. I was on such a rush, though, after I had him. So glad to meet him and anxious to spend every moment possible with him. I also wanted to establish a strong nursing relationship.

    Where I worked, I was not a fan of the nursery (also where I birthed and will birth again.) Babies would be crying in their bassinet or the mamma-roo for a while before a nurse would do anything, and the first response was usually a pacifier and/or some sugar water on the pacifier. Whenever my son cried in the hospital, it was attended to immediately. He just went through a very traumatic experience and was adjusting to a very new way of life - how could I not be there for him?

    I sent my daughter to the nursery. She gagged on amniotic fluid quite a bit (despite being born vaginally) and was silent when struggling. I felt she would be better watched there in the event that I (gasp!) fell asleep from 26 hours of labor.

    I had a well established nursing relationship. (Lucky, I think)

    Her "traumatic" experience made her very sleepy. She slept for 4 hrs in the nursery and the nurse brought her to me to feed her. She would have been sleeping in her bassinet anyway and we both benefited from the rest. I didn't feel un(der)prepared to bring her home because she slept in the nursery. When we got home, we were up every 2 hrs and sheerly exhausted, to be expected.

    I don't think she suffered or missed out on bonding time because she spent 12 hrs away from me (and H).

    BFP #1: 4/2/12 -- DD born 12/15/12. BFP #2: 4/1/14 -- CP. BFP #3: 4/28/14 -- EDD 1/10/15

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  • BeauxbatonBeauxbaton member
    edited July 2014
    The hospitals here that you can birth at don't even have nurseries. They converted the old nurseries to storage.

    ETA: I really liked where I gave birth. My son never left.my sight except when he went for his circumcision, which my husband or myself could have gone with him. We even switched from the hospital to the birth care center for recovery and I held my son the whole walk (well I was in a wheelchair.) But that hospital is trying to be I guess "certified" as a baby friendly hospital. So they were fantastic
  • LadyXaverianLadyXaverian member
    edited July 2014
    @muskiefan07 I used the nursery last time, too. I don't feel like our bond suffered at all. I can't imagine a stronger bond between mother and child than the one my daughter and I have. 

    I'm not going to use the nursery this time around, though. Or at least, I'm not planning to. There were a few things they did that came from a good place but were not what I would have chosen to do. Now that I'm an "experienced" mom, I feel more confident keeping the new baby (I typed "her" first.. hmmmm... momma's intuition??) with me this time.

    However, I don't blame anyone who chooses to use it. It's good to know it's there if needed.
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    Our sweet girl is 3!


    Lilypie - (R7Ux)


  • Isn't it a joke that first time parents never use the nursery and second time parents can't wait to use it? They know how much they need the break. :) I don't know if I'll use it. I don't know if H will stay will me or go home to take care of DS. I was going to ask other 2+ moms what they plan on doing.

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  • motherboy said:

    Isn't it a joke that first time parents never use the nursery and second time parents can't wait to use it? They know how much they need the break. :) I don't know if I'll use it. I don't know if H will stay will me or go home to take care of DS. I was going to ask other 2+ moms what they plan on doing.


    We used the nursery with our first, but I don't plan on using it with this baby. The entire experience was overwhelming but I feel better prepared, and am looking forward to having baby in the room with me.

    My mom is retiring this fall so she's planning on driving up and staying with DS while DH and I are in the hospital with the new baby. I'm kinda nervous because she's talking about bringing my step dad and she will definitely bring my little sister. My step dad is a really good guy, sometimes he's just thoughtless. I cannot wait to see my little sister. She's amazing
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  • motherboy said:
    Isn't it a joke that first time parents never use the nursery and second time parents can't wait to use it? They know how much they need the break. :) I don't know if I'll use it. I don't know if H will stay will me or go home to take care of DS. I was going to ask other 2+ moms what they plan on doing.
    I'm the opposite! I used it last time but don't plan to the 2nd time around.
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    Our sweet girl is 3!


    Lilypie - (R7Ux)


  • longcat07longcat07 member
    edited July 2014
    BookitBoo said:
    Isn't it a joke that first time parents never use the nursery and second time parents can't wait to use it? They know how much they need the break. :) I don't know if I'll use it. I don't know if H will stay will me or go home to take care of DS. I was going to ask other 2+ moms what they plan on doing.
    We used the nursery with our first, but I don't plan on using it with this baby. The entire experience was overwhelming but I feel better prepared, and am looking forward to having baby in the room with me. My mom is retiring this fall so she's planning on driving up and staying with DS while DH and I are in the hospital with the new baby. I'm kinda nervous because she's talking about bringing my step dad and she will definitely bring my little sister. My step dad is a really good guy, sometimes he's just thoughtless. I cannot wait to see my little sister. She's amazing
    ditto this...used it with DS but don't plan on it this time.  to be fair, i was alone with DS.  my mom was there, but she went home at 9pm and wasn't coming back till 3pm the next day, and i had stitches and needed help just to get out of bed and walk to the bathroom the first night.  plus the nursery was only open from 11pm to 7am...baby had to be in the room outside of that time, so it was literally only for overnights.  i should have more support this time around so i don't anticipate needing the nursery, but i won't say anything for sure till we're there.

    ...actually, i'm not even sure if the hospital at which i'll be delivering has a nursery at all.

    edit: i had them bring me DS when he needed feeding, which was twice both night we were there.  and my new hospital DOES have a nursery.  lol
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    BFP#3 EDD 01.14.15, RAINBOW baby girl born 01.16.2015


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  • I kept all mine with me sent dh's ass home he was in my way :p aside from my first daughter she spent the first night in the NICU on antibiotics since my water broke on sunday and she wasnt born until 3 days later. with this one as the hospital in my city closed and they opened a new private one im not sure what to expect or if the even have nurseries
  • Thanks @LadyXaverian‌!

    I guess we were lucky with the nursing staff in the nursery. They didn't give a pacifier or bottle. They woke her up when it had been 4 hrs and promptly brought her to me to feed her. I felt great about it. Had I had a different experience, I would consider rooming in this time around. I also respect that moms are doing their best and that shouldn't be overlooked. :)

    BFP #1: 4/2/12 -- DD born 12/15/12. BFP #2: 4/1/14 -- CP. BFP #3: 4/28/14 -- EDD 1/10/15

    Jan 15  NOV siggy challenge: 

  • Yea personally I was getting no sleep and they would yell at me if I started to dose off while holding her- I'm talking about like an hour in a nursery not sending the baby in there for the night- just sometimes you need a break and especially after a c section I needed to recover
  • CanukMamCanukMam member
    edited July 2014
    MKro2 said:
    Maebb said:
    I think it's kind of tacky to keep the sex of your baby a secret if your sole reason for doing so is to control what kind of gifts you get at your baby shower. I get that people keep it a secret for other reasons, but just because you don't want all pink or blue or you'd rather get things other than clothes - that's lame. I think it's ok to register for baby gifts, and it's ok to answer if people ask questions about what baby items you really want or need, but beyond that, just graciously accept the gifts that are given to you (or discreetly return them and then buy what you want), and don't try to be manipulative.

    @Maebb - this was so going to be my UO.  It also bugs me if the sole reason is to keep it from your MIL.  Yeah they can be extremely annoying, but they are LO's grandma and they aren't going to be around forever.  Let them spoil the LOs (within reason) while they can.  Some of my best childhood memories involve my grandparents from both sides.  My Dad's parent are both now gone and my Mom's parents are in really poor health.  I'm glad I got the time and had the relationships I did with them.


     

    Guess your talking about me. Your keyword there is "within reason". I do let her spoil DS1 within reason but I'll be damned if my newborn (if it's a girl) is going to wear heels and a big frilly boa! I don't care how cute she thinks it is! Just because she is Nana doesn't mean she gets to completely disregard mama's opinions and walk all over me.

    We all have our reasons for telling the gender or not, when to reveal the name, allow who we want into the delivery room, stay in our house after the delivery etc. 

    We do what makes us feel comfortable and to hold those at bay who will walk all over us during a time that we should enjoy. Also, your MIL may not be as extreme as mine, so it's hard for you to imagine yourself in my position. 

    It's not like she isn't going to find out the gender (or should I say sex now??) as soon as LO is born. I wouldn't dress her up as a boy and not let MIL change diapers and name her a unisex name. I just don't want her to have the next 5 months to shop and buy every single pink princess thing she sets her eyes on, because she absolutely will. Also, there will be a huge huge build up, part of me still things something could happen. What if we loose this baby, it happens, I know it would be bad but I can't help but think it would be that much worse for her if it was a girl.

    Anyway, lots of reasons, but they are my reasons and I think it's unfair to be judged for something so so trivial.
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  • I hated my nursery last time. I'm really pretty sure they fed Chloe sugar water and insisted that I nurse her on THEIR schedule. Heaven forbid the baby slept 5 hours the first night in the big open world. They also demanded to take her at midnight and 8am every day. The day of my discharge, I didn't get her back until noon. I was PISSED. This is my one reason why I want out of the hospital as soon as possible.&nbspblockquote>

    Did we deliver at the same hospital?? Seriously, the nursery here is terrible too. I am planning to discharge myself and LO within a few hours after delivery this time around (provided all goes well).

  • thompnia said:

    I don't understand why anyone would want to send their baby to the nursery in the hospital. My son stayed with us except for two hours - his circumcision and his discharge evaluation. I was on such a rush, though, after I had him. So glad to meet him and anxious to spend every moment possible with him.

    Every situation is different. I told myself the same until I was in it. I was induced, it took a while to work, hospital bed was hard to sleep in, nerves etc kept us up. By the time baby was here over 36 hours later we were exhausted. Add another 9 hours of wakefulness to that and my husband and I were becoming delirious. Baby had just nursed but was fussy and I wasn't comfortable falling asleep with her in my arms in the bed so I did what I needed to get some rest before returning home. They took her, swaddled her, got her to sleep, and when she woke up to feed, they brought her right back to me. I was able to get 2 hours of rest and I needed it BAD.
    Stephanie Ella ~ 6/15/2012
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  • jessah127 said:

    @thompnia Maybe once I have my baby I'll want to send her to the nursery, but at this point I really can't imagine doing that. I plan on trying to nurse, so I'd like to have her there with me as much as I possibly can. My cousin who just had her baby had her sent to the nursery overnight so that she could rest. Sure, rest sounds nice, but I really doubt I'll be resting well in the hospital either way since it'll be my first overnight stay as a patient. I also think I will rest easier knowing she's right there with me.

    You just never know.....
    Stephanie Ella ~ 6/15/2012
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  • A big negative for the nursery for me was that I didn't see the point. My son pretty much slept or was on the boob. So I think I would have gotten less rest waiting for someone to come get him after he fell asleep and I worried that they wouldnt bring him back the moment he started crying.
  • emmyg65 said:

    I have to admit I'm a little jealous of you ladies who have the option of the nursery. At the birth center I chose, I go home about six hours after giving birth (if all goes well). No overnight stay, no nursery. They come visit you at home and are available by phone, but I'm a bit nervous to go home right away with my floppy little helpless potato!

    Im jealous of this!

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  • britb618britb618 member
    edited July 2014
    I actually know the nurses that work in the hospital we are at so I am confident that the baby would be fine plus like I said they won't keep them over night but for two hours while I get some shut eye in btw feeding I think it was worth it...I was actually annoyed because they woke the baby since she was sleeping more than two hours so I could nurse...don't wake a sleeping baby...seriously!
  • I actually had huge issues with our nursery. After Xander was born the nurse brought him to me to breast feed, and she was pushing two or three bassinets. I was so exhausted I couldn't hold my eyes open so I couldn't see far, but she did run into DS's bassinet with another one on accident because she was attempting to juggle so many bassinets. DH was either in the bathroom or perhaps down at the car, but I wasn't able to walk, I don't know that the epi had worn off and I still had foley bag attached. She left the bassinet just inside the door and when I asked her to bring the baby to me, she huffed at me and made it very clear that I was being a nuisance.


    We never toured our facility (yeah, really. wtf was I thinking??) but I had only heard amazing things from friends and family. It was my own pure stupidity and if we lived in Florida still we would not be giving birth at that hospital, no matter how much closer it was.

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  • jessah127 said:
    @thompnia Maybe once I have my baby I'll want to send her to the nursery, but at this point I really can't imagine doing that. I plan on trying to nurse, so I'd like to have her there with me as much as I possibly can. My cousin who just had her baby had her sent to the nursery overnight so that she could rest. Sure, rest sounds nice, but I really doubt I'll be resting well in the hospital either way since it'll be my first overnight stay as a patient. I also think I will rest easier knowing she's right there with me.
    You just never know.....
    Right, which is why I said that once I have her I may choose to send her to the nursery. I can tell you all about how I feel about it now, but I'm a first time mom. I have no idea how it's all going to go. I could very well change my mind, or maybe I won't. I won't know until the time comes, or if God forbid something doesn't go quite right I may not even have the option to keep her with me. At this point I'm hoping to keep her in the room, which could change, but I'm not judging anyone else for planning to do it differently.
    Don't worry I wasn't judging you. 
    Stephanie Ella ~ 6/15/2012
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  • emmyg65 said:

    I have to admit I'm a little jealous of you ladies who have the option of the nursery. At the birth center I chose, I go home about six hours after giving birth (if all goes well). No overnight stay, no nursery. They come visit you at home and are available by phone, but I'm a bit nervous to go home right away with my floppy little helpless potato!

    This is one of the reasons I chose not to do the birth center. Great if I feel like going home after birth, but what if I'm not ready and they keep saying, you'll be fine...
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  • They had a nursery with DD, I sent her the second night at like midnight. She wasn't nursing well and I was exhausted and they insisted. They didn't bring her back till 4am and I was calling them to bring her back. I had already decided with number 2 I wouldn't send him but they did away with the nursery so it was a nonissue. I wouldn't have let ds go and I wouldn't let this one either, but that's me. I understand why people send them there I just couldn't be comfortable unless they were with me.

    Now, as for dh he stayed with me for dd, but stayed with dd with ds. I was alone and perfectly happy just me and him. It gave me so much time to bond with him I loved it, since as soon as I got home there was so much to do.

    LOUD NOISES!

    K- born 7/5/2011

    G- born 6/24/2013

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  • After my last homebirth, I pretty much just slept in bed/nursing with the baby all day. Was great and very relaxing. Never needed a nursery, but DH would have been happy to take the baby downstairs for a few hours if I needed to be completely alone.
  • nah82nah82 member
    First baby I finally let them talk me into sending him to the nursery to get some rest.  I don't think it was beneficial, though.  They brought him right back as soon as he woke up and was crying and I don't think I had even slept an hour at that point, so he might as well have been in my room.

    Second baby stayed with me the whole time.  One of the nurses was nice enough to hold him a second for me so I could pee at midnight because husband had gone home overnight.  I even wheeled him into the bathroom with me in the morning to take my shower.  (That showed them for having the pediatrician examine baby #1 while I was in the shower the first time around so I didn't get to hear anything she had to say about his jaundice and husband didn't do a good job filling me in after the fact.)
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