I am definitely onboard the hating open engagements train!
My little brother ad his "fiancé" are 19. They got "engaged" early last year after only dating about 8 months. Since the "engagement", they have broken up and gotten back together at least 3 times. Neither works, his fiancé basically came over to spend the night one night to my parent's house and never moved out, so they mooch off of my folks. They both started community college and then dropped out within a few weeks because neither would do homework or assignments while they were together. She does NOTHING at my parent's house to help out, she stalks my brother and cannot go more than an hour without some kind of contact with him, and when he worked with my dad and uncle, she drove 45 miles each way to have lunch with him every day.
They have no business being engaged and have no plans of leaving my parent's house and making it on their own, they have no wedding date picked out or intention of setting one, and anytime they call each other "fiancé", I eye roll so hard that I feel like I'm going to backflip.
I thought of another one: I am completely convinced that pregnancy brain is a real phenomenon.
I feel like my IQ has fallen about 20-30 points during both of my pregnancies and I can't remember anything. I often have to look up how to even spell basic words or will go into a room to do something and forget what I went in there to do. Just this morning, I went into my bathroom to make sure I had unplugged my chi and then once I got back downstairs, I could not remember if my chi was unplugged.
IF DX: DOR & Fragile X pre-mutation carrier
2011: FSH 13.3 & E 99; AMH 0.54
2nd FSH 6.2 E 40's AFC: 8
BFP from Clomid/IUI ~ Pre-e and IUGR during pregnancy ~ DS born 9/4/12
Feb./March 2013: AMH less than 0.16 (undectable) and AFC = 4; BFP from supps ~ DS#2 due May 2014
And another one: I don't know how to word this exactly, but I sometimes feel like having a preemie is treated like NBD when it is a big deal. I get that no one wants the bejesus scared out of them while they are pregnant and a lot of people are just trying to be positive, but I also think giving every example of how a friend-of-a-friend had a 25 weeker who is now perfectly normal at 2 years old trivializes the fact that some preemies don't make it, others end up with delays and even in those who do great, the battle that his/her parents probably went through to get to that point is really tough.
IF DX: DOR & Fragile X pre-mutation carrier
2011: FSH 13.3 & E 99; AMH 0.54
2nd FSH 6.2 E 40's AFC: 8
BFP from Clomid/IUI ~ Pre-e and IUGR during pregnancy ~ DS born 9/4/12
Feb./March 2013: AMH less than 0.16 (undectable) and AFC = 4; BFP from supps ~ DS#2 due May 2014
Not using a name due to popularity is dumb. If you love a name use it and don't feel the need to constantly defend your name choice.
I understand the "I don't want there to be five others in her class" argument, but I also feel like there's a wider spread of names now than when we were kids.
I disagree. When there's 5 Graces, 5 Emily's and 5 Emily-Graces in my daughter's class, you're darn right I'm giving her a different name.
Were you planning on using the name Grace or Emily but didn't due to popularity?
Can I have an UO even though I haven't been here in a week? It's been a SHIT-TASTIC week, btw. No time for bumping when everyone is sick, construction is a nightmare, mother nature decides to send the heavens down upon us over and over and over again, and family feuds make me long for the day I can drink again.
Anyway, UO: I am SO SICK of the people on my FB feed who constantly post the SAME THINGS over and over and over and over and over and... you get the point. I mean, 5-10 times a day, everyday. Is your life REALLY only filled with photographing your meals? Do you have nothing more to say other than to post pictures of quotes by other people? How many Buzzfeed quizzes about which TV character you are can you possibly fit into one day? In particular, I have reached the "block from my newsfeed" point with one acquaintance who is a doula and goes out of her way to post anti-vax and anti-cs articles from sun up to sun down. Some of us are very likely getting a c/s in just a few short weeks (eek!)- I'm trying to wrap my head around that and NOT make myself sick with fear every night, I don't need to see your scary, judgy shit on FB everyday.
That is all.
Can I add to that facebook annoyance list? I hate the self-congratulatory gym posts. You DO NOT need to post/check in EVERY TIME you go to the gym.... I would be willing to bet that fat-shaming crossfit chick from a few weeks ago is one of those people.
YES... and can I add to the add? On the gym-whoring note, this one might get me flamed but I swear it's not really about weight: There is an acquaintance on my FB page who has a new pyramid scheme every month. She's always trying to hock something and uses FB to advertise her new endeavor. This month, she's posting daily pics of her exercise and weight loss journey and trying to get people to buy the supplements that she's apparently now a reseller of. It's annoying enough to begin with since she changes her mind on her career path as often as I change my underwear, so it's hard to buy into any perceived passion she expresses about it. BUT, as much so, it's annoying because she's still pretty overweight. It's like asking someone who got their license suspended to give driving lessons, or to pay a tutor who can't read. I mean, use the product first and then sell it. I don't know how she thinks she's the poster child for the supplement that' she's been using for 20 days and hasn't lost any weight yet. Isn't that part of the buy-in on something like that? Seeing how successful someone else was at it?
To be clear it's really NOT about her weight to me- she could be 600 lbs and I wouldn't think any differently of her. It's the act of trying to sell a lifestyle that she's been living for less than 3 weeks and trying to be a model of good health when she's not yet there. I feel like you need to do the work first and then get people on board with it once it works for you.
This^^^! I have a friend that switches diets every 10 minutes and tries to get people to do it with her so that she gets money off of her "shakes". (And does the every week side by side pics of her "progress")
Being health conscious and a scrutinizor of ingredients, I told her there was no way I was eating a soy based protein shake while TTC because too much soy can screw with hormone levels. I also warned her that with her having thyroid and PCOS issues, that the soy wasn't a good idea for her either. She gave the whole "well my cousin's aunt's dentist's sister has the same thing as me and she was fine" spiel and kept using them. Well, wouldn't you know it, a week or so later she posts this long post about how she got sick and started having major issues which her doctor said was directly due to the high levels of soy protein in the shakes! Shocker!
Also on the Social site front, I cannot stand the constant Check ins and play by plays of people's every move on IG and FB.
Shake chick from above does this to the point that every single person online could easily chart her weekly schedule, where she lives (she created a home check in with her specific address), and when she is and isn't home. When her husband left the country for a month, she constantly posted about him being gone for however long. I seriously wanted to grab her by the hair and beat the stupid out of her. Everything she posts is public on both sites! Do people not realize that all it takes is one psychopath or nut job to stumble upon this information and "boom" instant easy target for burglary, home invasion, and/or stalking!?!
She seriously does not get the danger she puts herself in daily, and gets upset when we're out together and I untag myself from her check ins.
I will probably get flamed here, but it's a biggie for me right now. I'm so tired of reading about the heroin epidemic in my area. And I'm tired of everyone still talking about Phillip Seymour Hoffman and I'm even more tired of addiction being blamed on mental illness. Is that the case sometimes? Absolutely. All the time? No.
Next week will mark the one year anniversary of the death of one of my oldest and closest friends...from a heroin overdose. I spent the year before that with him in rehabs, hospitals, outpatient treatment facilities, etc. I was the one legally in charge of making decisions regarding his care (he had signed off to give me that power). It was draining in every sense of the word but I loved him and really wanted him to get better. Like PSH, he had unlimited means and could afford the best rehab facilities.
Well, he had relapsed in rehab and was buying pills at outpatient. He was kicked out of the fancy facility and transferred to a state one (which kicked him out after a month because his insurance wouldn't pay for any longer than that. When I requested to pay cash for his treatment I was told no).
The truth is that even though he had been clean (heroin wise) for almost a year, he didn't really want to be clean. He didn't start taking heroin because he was mentally ill. He made a conscious decision to try it after being given a sample for free. He had too much money and too little responsibility. Pot, coke, ecstasy and God only knows what else were fun for him because he enjoyed, as he used to put it, partying like a rock star.
So to constantly read that every addict isn't really at fault infuriates me because some of them are. And I'm going to stop before this gets any longer.
I'm sorry for your loss. But I disagree. I don't think most people believe an addict has no role in their addiction but it has been classified as a disease (if I'm remembering correctly) for a reason.
I think of it as if the person was bipolar, and they won't take their meds. Yes they are choosing not too, but there is something functionally different about their brain or whatever that doesn't allow them to think normally.
Btw I have a ton of personal experience with this if you're wondering and think maybe you should have gone to alanon. And I mean this in the nicest way possible. Not trying to be rude at all so please do not take it that way.
I thought of another one: I am completely convinced that pregnancy brain is a real phenomenon.
I feel like my IQ has fallen about 20-30 points during both of my pregnancies and I can't remember anything. I often have to look up how to even spell basic words or will go into a room to do something and forget what I went in there to do. Just this morning, I went into my bathroom to make sure I had unplugged my chi and then once I got back downstairs, I could not remember if my chi was unplugged.
God it is so real. I had no idea the toll pregnancy would take on my brain!
And to make it even better a lady said to me, "it never goes back to normal."
Please reassure me I will not feel this stupid for the rest of my life!
Meh, I won't use a popular name either, but only because it's NMS. I like using uncommon names, but names that are spelled as they sound.
Around here I wouldn't use names like Aidan/Caden, Brooklyn, Hadley, Harper.
Don't get me wrong, I adore them all, actually (especially Aidan and Harper), but they're all incredibly common at the Pre-K I work at and also with my friends. I don't know of anyone else with DS's name or DD's. No biggy if it happens, but we purposely go for names that aren't common.
The point was more if you love a name popularity should not play into you using it. If you like uncommon names then its really not applicable to you. No?
I HAVE MY VERY FIRST UO!!! Yeah been here since Sept and just now thinking of something I'd actually like to put! haha
I HATE the pushy-ness of pressuring kids to go to college these days! I went to what I guess you could call a tech school (for photography) and DH went to school for heavy equipment and diesel mechanic. Granted I'm not working in my field (got my EMT certification and went into the army) that I went to school for, but I love what I do! (ok well... did... out for an injury right now) DH makes pretty good money and he's looking at a position where he could be making a good chunk more soon.
I've seen so many kids go to school and waste years and thousands of dollars in general studies cause they don't know what they want to do! And then go for a major that they have serious problems finding a job in their field when they graduate. I applaud anyone who decides to go to school and finds what they love and goes for it! If it worked for you thats great!! But why push your kid into college when they have no idea what they want to do? Sometimes people need to live life a little before school to understand whats out there besides high school and living with mom and dad.
I'm not saying college is a waste. I'm not saying don't send your kid to college. But we have a generation of college kids who can't get jobs because their either over qualified or they have the degree but companies want you to have 2+ years experience in your field first. How are you gonna get experience if you just came out of school!! Take nursing, I was thinking of going into nursing. But I see so many hospitals and places that want you to have 3+ years in order for them to hire you. It sucks for people who are really smart and will be great at the job, but can't get the opportunity to even start!
Tech schools are great! A lot of them help you with an apprenticeship while you're in school so you can get some experience. I worked as an assistant at a photography studio while at school on days I didn't have class. You can't always get that in college!
So I guess my UO is if your kid doesn't know what they want to do yet, don't push too much! You'll be wasting thousands if they spend years with an undecided major and just go and accumulate classes. Sometimes waiting for them to live a little is a great idea. I had to move away from home and be on my own to realize I love EMS and emergency medicine. Later I can move onto nursing or something related.
**Lighting a candle in memory of our angel babies and angel mama in heaven from May'14**
I thought of another one: I am completely convinced that pregnancy brain is a real phenomenon.
I feel like my IQ has fallen about 20-30 points during both of my pregnancies and I can't remember anything. I often have to look up how to even spell basic words or will go into a room to do something and forget what I went in there to do. Just this morning, I went into my bathroom to make sure I had unplugged my chi and then once I got back downstairs, I could not remember if my chi was unplugged.
It undoubtedly is. Anyone who says otherwise should be throat punched because I am dumb.as.fvck. lately. Not to mention clumsy.
I will probably get flamed here, but it's a biggie for me right now. I'm so tired of reading about the heroin epidemic in my area. And I'm tired of everyone still talking about Phillip Seymour Hoffman and I'm even more tired of addiction being blamed on mental illness. Is that the case sometimes? Absolutely. All the time? No.
Next week will mark the one year anniversary of the death of one of my oldest and closest friends...from a heroin overdose. I spent the year before that with him in rehabs, hospitals, outpatient treatment facilities, etc. I was the one legally in charge of making decisions regarding his care (he had signed off to give me that power). It was draining in every sense of the word but I loved him and really wanted him to get better. Like PSH, he had unlimited means and could afford the best rehab facilities.
Well, he had relapsed in rehab and was buying pills at outpatient. He was kicked out of the fancy facility and transferred to a state one (which kicked him out after a month because his insurance wouldn't pay for any longer than that. When I requested to pay cash for his treatment I was told no).
The truth is that even though he had been clean (heroin wise) for almost a year, he didn't really want to be clean. He didn't start taking heroin because he was mentally ill. He made a conscious decision to try it after being given a sample for free. He had too much money and too little responsibility. Pot, coke, ecstasy and God only knows what else were fun for him because he enjoyed, as he used to put it, partying like a rock star.
So to constantly read that every addict isn't really at fault infuriates me because some of them are. And I'm going to stop before this gets any longer.
I'm sorry for the loss of your friend. My sister has been battling addiction for over ten years...with heroin being her drug of choice. It's taken quite the toll on our family. Even I can agree with your comment that it's infuriating to read every addict isn't really at fault. My sister has been in and out of rehab since 2005 and still goes back to the evil drugs. She's had the means and support networks to get her shit together...but just doesn't. I do think there's something wrong in that regard....she just can't handle the normal stresses of life that most of us deal with regularly. But in my opinion it's all a behavioral issue...not a "disease". The disease excuse is a cop out, IMO. I've seen her be clean and she's a different person so I know she can do it if she really tried.
I HAVE MY VERY FIRST UO!!! Yeah been here since Sept and just now thinking of something I'd actually like to put! haha
I HATE the pushy-ness of pressuring kids to go to college these days! I went to what I guess you could call a tech school (for photography) and DH went to school for heavy equipment and diesel mechanic. Granted I'm not working in my field (got my EMT certification and went into the army) that I went to school for, but I love what I do! (ok well... did... out for an injury right now) DH makes pretty good money and he's looking at a position where he could be making a good chunk more soon.
I've seen so many kids go to school and waste years and thousands of dollars in general studies cause they don't know what they want to do! And then go for a major that they have serious problems finding a job in their field when they graduate. I applaud anyone who decides to go to school and finds what they love and goes for it! If it worked for you thats great!! But why push your kid into college when they have no idea what they want to do? Sometimes people need to live life a little before school to understand whats out there besides high school and living with mom and dad.
I'm not saying college is a waste. I'm not saying don't send your kid to college. But we have a generation of college kids who can't get jobs because their either over qualified or they have the degree but companies want you to have 2+ years experience in your field first. How are you gonna get experience if you just came out of school!! Take nursing, I was thinking of going into nursing. But I see so many hospitals and places that want you to have 3+ years in order for them to hire you. It sucks for people who are really smart and will be great at the job, but can't get the opportunity to even start!
Tech schools are great! A lot of them help you with an apprenticeship while you're in school so you can get some experience. I worked as an assistant at a photography studio while at school on days I didn't have class. You can't always get that in college!
So I guess my UO is if your kid doesn't know what they want to do yet, don't push too much! You'll be wasting thousands if they spend years with an undecided major and just go and accumulate classes. Sometimes waiting for them to live a little is a great idea. I had to move away from home and be on my own to realize I love EMS and emergency medicine. Later I can move onto nursing or something related.
I actually totally agree with this. College isn't for everybody. There are so many jobs out there now that employers want a college degree for that years ago never would have required one because everyone is pushed to go to college and get that degree no matter what. Recently my company hired a new front desk admin assistant. she has her MASTERS. she answers phones, seats people in meeting rooms and gets them coffee. to think the amount she likely spent on that degree to now be getting talked down to and fetching those a-holes coffee makes me sad. and i know that's what she's dealing with because when i started here i did her job.
my husband never finished school, and i know it bothers him. but he's a union carpenter. he makes good money, has great benefits and actually enjoys his work. he served in the airforce, travelled a bunch and is well read, but he beats himself up because he doesn't have a degree. his brother is also a carpenter, and felt the same way about not finishing school. he went back part time at night to get that degree just to say he had it. and guess what he's doing now? still working as a union carpenter.
College is great, but i totally agree that unless you have a real idea what you want to do, and a plan for after, it's not for everyone. I have a journalism degree and am working in finance due to some dumb luck 9 years ago. i would never trade my college experience, because it was great, but there are times i wish i taken some time to figure out what i really wanted to do before i went. i'm lucky enough to have pretty minimal student loans, but i still have them and am paying for them!
I will probably get flamed here, but it's a biggie for me right now. I'm so tired of reading about the heroin epidemic in my area. And I'm tired of everyone still talking about Phillip Seymour Hoffman and I'm even more tired of addiction being blamed on mental illness. Is that the case sometimes? Absolutely. All the time? No.
Next week will mark the one year anniversary of the death of one of my oldest and closest friends...from a heroin overdose. I spent the year before that with him in rehabs, hospitals, outpatient treatment facilities, etc. I was the one legally in charge of making decisions regarding his care (he had signed off to give me that power). It was draining in every sense of the word but I loved him and really wanted him to get better. Like PSH, he had unlimited means and could afford the best rehab facilities.
Well, he had relapsed in rehab and was buying pills at outpatient. He was kicked out of the fancy facility and transferred to a state one (which kicked him out after a month because his insurance wouldn't pay for any longer than that. When I requested to pay cash for his treatment I was told no).
The truth is that even though he had been clean (heroin wise) for almost a year, he didn't really want to be clean. He didn't start taking heroin because he was mentally ill. He made a conscious decision to try it after being given a sample for free. He had too much money and too little responsibility. Pot, coke, ecstasy and God only knows what else were fun for him because he enjoyed, as he used to put it, partying like a rock star.
So to constantly read that every addict isn't really at fault infuriates me because some of them are. And I'm going to stop before this gets any longer.
I'm sorry for your loss. But I disagree. I don't think most people believe an addict has no role in their addiction but it has been classified as a disease (if I'm remembering correctly) for a reason.
I think of it as if the person was bipolar, and they won't take their meds. Yes they are choosing not too, but there is something functionally different about their brain or whatever that doesn't allow them to think normally.
Btw I have a ton of personal experience with this if you're wondering and think maybe you should have gone to alanon. And I mean this in the nicest way possible. Not trying to be rude at all so please do not take it that way.
I did go to a few family support group things (not alanon) but it was hard. I heard a lot of "where did I go wrong" and "it's all my fault". I couldn't relate because I knew that his addiction wasn't my fault. It was his. Also, he lived back in my home state (about 2 1/2 hours away). I was driving back and forth every weekend, day off, etc. and when I was home, had DH and my life back here to balance. So taking the extra time to go to meetings for myself just wasn't really something that I wanted.
Also, I get what you're saying about brains being wired differently and like I said in my original post, I do believe that some of them are. But my point is that some people make a conscious decision to try something knowing damn well what the consequences might be. And I don't think that mental illness can be faulted for that.
I thought of another one: I am completely convinced that pregnancy brain is a real phenomenon.
I feel like my IQ has fallen about 20-30 points during both of my pregnancies and I can't remember anything. I often have to look up how to even spell basic words or will go into a room to do something and forget what I went in there to do. Just this morning, I went into my bathroom to make sure I had unplugged my chi and then once I got back downstairs, I could not remember if my chi was unplugged.
Totally is. I think I need a clinical diagnosis. The other day I fired off what I thought was a pretty unassuming email to a higher-up about something that happened at one of my properties, because I wanted to bring it to their attention, but said I thought it would not have any big impact on our revenues. Then I got a slew of emails from the exec board asking for all kinds of details and realized I left the "not" out of NOT going to have a big impact on revenue. My bad and all that.
I think long engagements are lame. Anything longer than like 8-9 months just seems ridiculous (without a good reason). I don't really understand waiting to be done with school or until someone gets a decent job to be a reason for waiting to get married. My cousin has been with her fiancé for 12 years (started dating when they were 14) and got engaged a year ago valentines day, their wedding isn't until Sept 2015...really? 2 1/2 year engagement? Why?
My brother had a year and a half engagement but that was because 18 months down the road was the first Saturday both the church and reception hall they wanted was available. I don't side eye that as much as people who get engaged and then don't even begin think about making plans for 6+ months. Just say you wanted some jewelry to wear At this time FFS, not a wedding/marriage.
We got engaged when I was 21 (and 3 days). We enjoyed being engaged and knowing this was it for us, but at the same time we didn't rush a wedding. We got married after being engaged a year and a half (and together about 5 years) when I was 22 and he was 23. I was working full time and going to school full time, and we got married after I graduated and then when we got back from our honeymoon I started a salaried job at a financial institution. We both felt like it was a mature decision to do it that way, and there was no reason to rush, we had forever. (Cheesy, right?)
I feel like the people who are together for 10 years or so without getting engaged or married are more side-eye worthy. We were together 5 years before tying the knot, but I was like 17 when we started dating. But after 10+ years, its like shit or get off the pot already. IMHO.
Maybe getting married just isn't as important to some people as it is to others?
Last Vegas was the stupidest movie ever. I can't believe those actors agreed to do it.
I wanted to name my baby Ava if it is a girl but decided not to because I know about 5 Ava's born in the last 3 months. I think it's a good reason, I don't want to yell out my child's name and have 5 different girls turn around.
I don't understand giving birth in a pool. What happens if you poo? Do you just sit in a pool with your own shit floating around? How is that sanitary for the baby?
I will probably get flamed here, but it's a biggie for me right now. I'm so tired of reading about the heroin epidemic in my area. And I'm tired of everyone still talking about Phillip Seymour Hoffman and I'm even more tired of addiction being blamed on mental illness. Is that the case sometimes? Absolutely. All the time? No.
Next week will mark the one year anniversary of the death of one of my oldest and closest friends...from a heroin overdose. I spent the year before that with him in rehabs, hospitals, outpatient treatment facilities, etc. I was the one legally in charge of making decisions regarding his care (he had signed off to give me that power). It was draining in every sense of the word but I loved him and really wanted him to get better. Like PSH, he had unlimited means and could afford the best rehab facilities.
Well, he had relapsed in rehab and was buying pills at outpatient. He was kicked out of the fancy facility and transferred to a state one (which kicked him out after a month because his insurance wouldn't pay for any longer than that. When I requested to pay cash for his treatment I was told no).
The truth is that even though he had been clean (heroin wise) for almost a year, he didn't really want to be clean. He didn't start taking heroin because he was mentally ill. He made a conscious decision to try it after being given a sample for free. He had too much money and too little responsibility. Pot, coke, ecstasy and God only knows what else were fun for him because he enjoyed, as he used to put it, partying like a rock star.
So to constantly read that every addict isn't really at fault infuriates me because some of them are. And I'm going to stop before this gets any longer.
I'm sorry for your loss. But I disagree. I don't think most people believe an addict has no role in their addiction but it has been classified as a disease (if I'm remembering correctly) for a reason.
I think of it as if the person was bipolar, and they won't take their meds. Yes they are choosing not too, but there is something functionally different about their brain or whatever that doesn't allow them to think normally.
Btw I have a ton of personal experience with this if you're wondering and think maybe you should have gone to alanon. And I mean this in the nicest way possible. Not trying to be rude at all so please do not take it that way.
I've been to Al-Anon and an active member of the Daytop community in NYC. Al-Anon refers to it as a disease but Daytop does not. My sister has had the most success and the longest "clean run" when she followed the Daytop practices, which treats addiction as a behavioral problem. I think in the cases where people self medicate with street drugs in lieu of meds for psychiatric disorders is a different story. I don't think all drug addicts have some sort of psychiatric disorder. When my sister is clean she is super smart and hilarious. When she's using, she becomes a liar and manipulator. It's horrible, and maybe I'm just so tired of all the lies over the years, but I hate the "disease" classification.
Not using a name due to popularity is dumb. If you love a name use it and don't feel the need to constantly defend your name choice.
I understand the "I don't want there to be five others in her class" argument, but I also feel like there's a wider spread of names now than when we were kids.
I disagree. When there's 5 Graces, 5 Emily's and 5 Emily-Graces in my daughter's class, you're darn right I'm giving her a different name.
Were you planning on using the name Grace or Emily but didn't due to popularity?
I think people have some assumption that being "popular" or "top 10" means every other baby born is given that name. Olivia is always my example, because I love that name. It was #4 most popular last year. Percentage-wise it was... .8%. ZOMG, my child can't have a name that .8 out of every 100 other girls might have! I was one of 3 Nicoles in many of my classes growing up and it bothered me... not a single, tiny iota of a bit.
I treat a lot of people with substance abuse & mental health dual diagnosis, and a massive part of treatment is an individual taking accountability for their choice to use AND choosing to commit to recovery. At the same time, the dialectic here is that it is both validating and factual to acknowledge that addiction runs far, far deeper than someone shrugging and deciding to shoot up each day. SA and MH issues go hand and hand, and while not every addict has a MH diagnosis, I think it's pretty obvious to any layperson that a balanced, healthy, functioning individual typically doesn't start smoking crack on a whim. I know it's hard when you've been hurt (and I'm very sorry for your loss), but part of finding compassion is remembering that addicts don't want to be addicts. Yes, some keep using despite all the support and a the treatment and some will bluntly tell you they don't want to quit, but that's because life without their chosen medication seems impossible and intolerable.
Again, I'm sorry for your loss and understand you've had your personal experiences with it, but I also just needed to counter this longheld stigma. It doesn't help.
I don't know if this will be controversial or not, but yesterday I learned that Jr and Sr Kindergarten is optional in Ontario. And now my husband and I are considering not sending our kid to school until grade 1.
Now, this isn't just to be different or anything, I have 2 main reasons. In the past 5 years Kindergarten has gone to all-day, which I have never been a fan of, even before we were thinking about having kids. Knowing what I know about the curriculum (I used to educational research on math and science curriculum), what kids do in all-day "kindergarten" is really not more than a well structured day-care. And I feel like the provincial government only introduced all-day JK and SK is as an election thing to make parents happy to save them childcare costs (Jk/SK is free, daycare is private and isn't). I don't think the all-day program was actually designed to improve kids education, and I like the idea of starting kids on a 1/2 day schedule to get them used to the routine without the drain of being in a classroom all day at age 4 (which daycare isn't like school in so many ways, and I LIKE that difference).
Also, my husband and I were recently listening to a documentary about education in many parts of Europe where kids don't start school until age 7, because there is a belief in allowing kids under 6 to just be kids and not worry about school. And I kind of like that attitude.
Obviously if we didn't start our kids until grade 1 we would do A LOT of education at home (even if we did start them at Jk/SK we will be doing that), and/or some sort of pre-school versus daycare at age 4 or 5. But I feel like having the option to limit the classroom time for a kid that young is something I would personally want, if we could financially afford it (clearly I would need to stay home and/or pay for private pre-school or Montessori program). I think our families will think we are nuts if we don't start our kids in Kindergarten, but it is something I am strongly considering.
I treat a lot of people with substance abuse & mental health dual diagnosis, and a massive part of treatment is an individual taking accountability for their choice to use AND choosing to commit to recovery. At the same time, the dialectic here is that it is both validating and factual to acknowledge that addiction runs far, far deeper than someone shrugging and deciding to shoot up each day. SA and MH issues go hand and hand, and while not every addict has a MH diagnosis, I think it's pretty obvious to any layperson that a balanced, healthy, functioning individual typically doesn't start smoking crack on a whim. I know it's hard when you've been hurt (and I'm very sorry for your loss), but part of finding compassion is remembering that addicts don't want to be addicts. Yes, some keep using despite all the support and a the treatment and some will bluntly tell you they don't want to quit, but that's because life without their chosen medication seems impossible and intolerable.
Again, I'm sorry for your loss and understand you've had your personal experiences with it, but I also just needed to counter this longheld stigma. It doesn't help.
You are right in all of this, especially the bolded. It's just so hard when it impacts your family and coming to the terms that they can't really help it is hard to swallow when you're being lied to over and over and over. It fu**ing sucks. It makes me really angry towards her and after helping clean up after her so many times I just feel beat up, used and taken advantage of. It makes me bitter and less understanding.
My UO is I don't care if a couple is married or not. Or if they are engaged. Or how long their engagement was. Or what their wedding was like. Or what the engagement ring looks like. I've seen no conclusive evidence that any of the above has any correlation whatsoever to the strength or health of a relationship.
I can't with the newbs coming in and trying to start new "things" for each day of the week cause they haven't been around long enough to realize there is already shit for every day they could easily participate in. Sorry its your first week here and you think you're all cutesy to come up with a theme for the day, the rest of us hags sorted that out MONTHS ago. Join the club. Also, I can't with the bitches who only bother to AW their bumps on HDBD but can't fucking pitch in with support on questions, vents, losses, and other important matters. I'm just gunna start flagging bitches who can't participate anywhere else. Mods, you have been warned of my bad behavior. And FFS, stop being fucking one post wonders. And stop with the post and runs. If you feel your shit is important enough to require a whole new fucking post, stick around and participate in your own damn post. And don't get shitty cause the internet strangers don't tell you whatever it is you want to hear. Go make a RL BFFL if you want puppies and butterflies. We speak truths here, sorry your fragile ego can't handle honesty Happy MFin Thursday, hoars. Edit cause I woke up in a bad fuckin mood and my GD Droid is fuckin with me!
You are right in all of this, especially the bolded. It's just so hard when it impacts your family and coming to the terms that they can't really help it is hard to swallow when you're being lied to over and over and over. It fu**ing sucks. It makes me really angry towards her and after helping clean up after her so many times I just feel beat up, used and taken advantage of. It makes me bitter and less understanding.
@meli1025 -- it is totally within your right to be angry, and hurt, and frustrated. It's also well within your rights to decide whether or not you want to support your sister, because I'm sure it takes a horrible toll on you and there's no guarantee that it's going to work or that your efforts will even be appreciated. Trust me, I totally, totally get the frustration and uncertainly and desire to shake someone you care about who is using... But I also can't help recognizing just how bad things have to be for someone to continue doing so. That's just a special kind of hell and I don't know anyone that happily puts themselves there. I know it SEEMS like if that person just tried harder or if they just wanted sobriety more they could do it, but don't you think they are the one who wants that more than anything? Even when I get unshakeable resistance from people, I have to hold onto that assumption or I know that I can't help them.
I treat a lot of people with substance abuse & mental health dual diagnosis, and a massive part of treatment is an individual taking accountability for their choice to use AND choosing to commit to recovery. At the same time, the dialectic here is that it is both validating and factual to acknowledge that addiction runs far, far deeper than someone shrugging and deciding to shoot up each day. SA and MH issues go hand and hand, and while not every addict has a MH diagnosis, I think it's pretty obvious to any layperson that a balanced, healthy, functioning individual typically doesn't start smoking crack on a whim. I know it's hard when you've been hurt (and I'm very sorry for your loss), but part of finding compassion is remembering that addicts don't want to be addicts. Yes, some keep using despite all the support and a the treatment and some will bluntly tell you they don't want to quit, but that's because life without their chosen medication seems impossible and intolerable.
Again, I'm sorry for your loss and understand you've had your personal experiences with it, but I also just needed to counter this longheld stigma. It doesn't help.
Can I have an UO even though I haven't been here in a week? It's been a SHIT-TASTIC week, btw. No time for bumping when everyone is sick, construction is a nightmare, mother nature decides to send the heavens down upon us over and over and over again, and family feuds make me long for the day I can drink again.
Anyway, UO: I am SO SICK of the people on my FB feed who constantly post the SAME THINGS over and over and over and over and over and... you get the point. I mean, 5-10 times a day, everyday. Is your life REALLY only filled with photographing your meals? Do you have nothing more to say other than to post pictures of quotes by other people? How many Buzzfeed quizzes about which TV character you are can you possibly fit into one day? In particular, I have reached the "block from my newsfeed" point with one acquaintance who is a doula and goes out of her way to post anti-vax and anti-cs articles from sun up to sun down. Some of us are very likely getting a c/s in just a few short weeks (eek!)- I'm trying to wrap my head around that and NOT make myself sick with fear every night, I don't need to see your scary, judgy shit on FB everyday.
That is all.
Can I add to that facebook annoyance list? I hate the self-congratulatory gym posts. You DO NOT need to post/check in EVERY TIME you go to the gym.... I would be willing to bet that fat-shaming crossfit chick from a few weeks ago is one of those people.
I used to do this when I was getting into running, posting how far and times once or twice a week. The encouragement from friends and family helped a lot when it was hard, which is why I posted.
I thought of another one: I am completely convinced that pregnancy brain is a real phenomenon.
I feel like my IQ has fallen about 20-30 points during both of my pregnancies and I can't remember anything. I often have to look up how to even spell basic words or will go into a room to do something and forget what I went in there to do. Just this morning, I went into my bathroom to make sure I had unplugged my chi and then once I got back downstairs, I could not remember if my chi was unplugged.
God it is so real. I had no idea the toll pregnancy would take on my brain!
And to make it even better a lady said to me, "it never goes back to normal."
Please reassure me I will not feel this stupid for the rest of my life!
Nope. No such luck. We're all fucked. Good luck to you ladies wanting to have 10 kids )
I don't understand giving birth in a pool. What happens if you poo? Do you just sit in a pool with your own shit floating around? How is that sanitary for the baby?
They scoop it out with a net. At least that is what they did for my SIL.
I don't understand giving birth in a pool. What happens if you poo? Do you just sit in a pool with your own shit floating around? How is that sanitary for the baby?
They scoop it out with a net. At least that is what they did for my SIL.
Ew. Guess you just gotta hope you don't have diarrhea that day.
I treat a lot of people with substance abuse & mental health dual diagnosis, and a massive part of treatment is an individual taking accountability for their choice to use AND choosing to commit to recovery. At the same time, the dialectic here is that it is both validating and factual to acknowledge that addiction runs far, far deeper than someone shrugging and deciding to shoot up each day. SA and MH issues go hand and hand, and while not every addict has a MH diagnosis, I think it's pretty obvious to any layperson that a balanced, healthy, functioning individual typically doesn't start smoking crack on a whim. I know it's hard when you've been hurt (and I'm very sorry for your loss), but part of finding compassion is remembering that addicts don't want to be addicts. Yes, some keep using despite all the support and a the treatment and some will bluntly tell you they don't want to quit, but that's because life without their chosen medication seems impossible and intolerable.
Again, I'm sorry for your loss and understand you've had your personal experiences with it, but I also just needed to counter this longheld stigma. It doesn't help.
Well said
I can't really say I understand either view point. I have watched people in my life be alcoholics or addicts and I can't wrap my head around it. I can only imagine how hard it is for people really involved. Part of my wonders that if addiction is indeed a disease, and you can't know you have it until you make the first choice that sends you down the spiral, maybe we should treat every one as an addict. If it's the first choice to drink or do a drug, shouldn't we be telling our kids, "Hey, you might be an addict. It's a disease where if you drink or do drugs or something else habitually, you'll die. But you don't know if or when the disease will strike, so you have to never drink or do drugs or do anything else that would endanger your life if you did it over and over and over again." Would that help at all? If we did that and someone still drank or did drugs or whatever, is it still a disease or is it a behavioral problem?
Like I said, I can't imagine how hard it is to deal with such things on an intimate level and my heart breaks for those caught in the situation. Genuinely trying to understand it is gut-wrenching.
UO: I really HATE duck dynasty. I just do not understand the fascination or ridiculous popularity of the show. I mean I live in Ohio and I feel like I cannot go to a store without seeing their faces on SOMETHING! And to make matters worse, my MIL is soooo obsessed with them. She got their CD for Christmas from my BIL and we had to listen to it the rest of the night. I literally wanted to cry and punch someone.
Secondly, I also hate those stupid pictures/e-cards that people constantly share on FB. You know the ones, "I love my sister - share if you agree!" - Also, my MIL has to be one of the worst culprits of this... except they are all of duck dynasty! which just makes everything worse.
end rant
Your Ariel gif made me think of an opinion that might be unpopular. I'm pretty sure Ariel wears a wig. No matter what her hair is doing, you never see a hair line under her bangs. Never. I find it seriously distracting when I watch Little Mermaid, trying to discover the end of her forehead.
Not using a name due to popularity is dumb. If you love a name use it and don't feel the need to constantly defend your name choice.
I understand the "I don't want there to be five others in her class" argument, but I also feel like there's a wider spread of names now than when we were kids.
I disagree. When there's 5 Graces, 5 Emily's and 5 Emily-Graces in my daughter's class, you're darn right I'm giving her a different name.
Were you planning on using the name Grace or Emily but didn't due to popularity?
I think people have some assumption that being "popular" or "top 10" means every other baby born is given that name. Olivia is always my example, because I love that name. It was #4 most popular last year. Percentage-wise it was... .8%. ZOMG, my child can't have a name that .8 out of every 100 other girls might have! I was one of 3 Nicoles in many of my classes growing up and it bothered me... not a single, tiny iota of a bit.
Where i live there are pretty much no other names than Grace, Emily, Ruby, Poppy, Ellie and Isla. Case in point - my neighbour has a daughter called Ruby and the people who lived here before us have a daughter called Ruby. My FB friend has a daughter called Grace Emily, who's best friend is Emily Grace. I could go on.
All it says to me is "I can't use my imagination to think of a name, so i'll choose the one the neighbour chose". DH and I roll our eyes whenever we hear one in the street, which is often. Those names aren't to my taste to begin with (shock, horror! We like androgynous girl's names!), but I stand by my point. Our daughter's name is Bobbie. Not to everyone's taste, but she'll be the only one without it being you-neek.
09/23/11 - Married DH
04/01/13 - BFP at 4wks
05/30/13 - MMC - BO @ 12wks 5d
08/29/13 - BFP @ 4wks 4d
09/17/13 - 7wks 2d - Normal HB Detected! Baby measuring perfect for dates and positioning!
10/23/13 - 12wks 3d - Perfect NT scan! HB 167 & baby wriggling, waving & yawning!
12/17/13 - 20wks 2 d - We're having a beautiful baby girl! Go Team Pink!
05/03/14 - Bobbie Gloria was born at 39+6 weighing 6lb 14oz!
I think diesels are far more eco-friendly than hybrids. Hybrids require the production of both gas engine parts and batteries (which are very destructive to produce) and have more items/moving parts to service. Diesels run for much longer (on average) can burn bio-fuels and get decent mpgs, plus pass modern emissions standards like any other vehicle. I just figure if you love the environment buy a diesel not a hybrid.
I guess my UO is that I hate when people are all about eco-friendly but don't think about all aspects of why something should or shouldn't be thought of as "green".
Whoever said they feel perpetually dumb, I agree, I don't even think I made a real point in the above. UGH!
I will probably get flamed here, but it's a biggie for me right now. I'm so tired of reading about the heroin epidemic in my area. And I'm tired of everyone still talking about Phillip Seymour Hoffman and I'm even more tired of addiction being blamed on mental illness. Is that the case sometimes? Absolutely. All the time? No.
Next week will mark the one year anniversary of the death of one of my oldest and closest friends...from a heroin overdose. I spent the year before that with him in rehabs, hospitals, outpatient treatment facilities, etc. I was the one legally in charge of making decisions regarding his care (he had signed off to give me that power). It was draining in every sense of the word but I loved him and really wanted him to get better. Like PSH, he had unlimited means and could afford the best rehab facilities.
Well, he had relapsed in rehab and was buying pills at outpatient. He was kicked out of the fancy facility and transferred to a state one (which kicked him out after a month because his insurance wouldn't pay for any longer than that. When I requested to pay cash for his treatment I was told no).
The truth is that even though he had been clean (heroin wise) for almost a year, he didn't really want to be clean. He didn't start taking heroin because he was mentally ill. He made a conscious decision to try it after being given a sample for free. He had too much money and too little responsibility. Pot, coke, ecstasy and God only knows what else were fun for him because he enjoyed, as he used to put it, partying like a rock star.
So to constantly read that every addict isn't really at fault infuriates me because some of them are. And I'm going to stop before this gets any longer.
I'm sorry for the loss of your friend. My sister has been battling addiction for over ten years...with heroin being her drug of choice. It's taken quite the toll on our family. Even I can agree with your comment that it's infuriating to read every addict isn't really at fault. My sister has been in and out of rehab since 2005 and still goes back to the evil drugs. She's had the means and support networks to get her shit together...but just doesn't. I do think there's something wrong in that regard....she just can't handle the normal stresses of life that most of us deal with regularly. But in my opinion it's all a behavioral issue...not a "disease". The disease excuse is a cop out, IMO. I've seen her be clean and she's a different person so I know she can do it if she really tried.
This has probably made me more angry than it should have, but @Mimaloo and @meli1025,: you need to tread lightly regarding this topic. You are spectators, not addicts. Addiction is a disease, whether you two choose to acknowledge it or not- it is NOT a cop out. I don't often speak about it, but I'm in recovery. I've been there, I've struggled with it. I'd appreciate if you ladies would drop it and talk about things you actually know a thing or two about.
The only thing I could think of that most people don't agree with me is open marriages. I believe in open marriages.
The reaction I receive when I tell someone this IRL:
I think open marriages are a recipe for disaster. Eventually your partner will fall in love with someone else. Trying to separate sex and love is a bad idea and it usually never works out.
Also, why would you marry someone if you want to be with other people?
The only thing I could think of that most people don't agree with me is open marriages. I believe in open marriages.
The reaction I receive when I tell someone this IRL:
I think open marriages are a recipe for disaster. Eventually your partner will fall in love with someone else. Trying to separate sex and love is a bad idea and it usually never works out.
Also, why would you marry someone if you want to be with other people?
This.
The idea of marriage is that you want to be with only that person for your whole life. If you're not content to be with just that person, then don't be married to them.
09/23/11 - Married DH
04/01/13 - BFP at 4wks
05/30/13 - MMC - BO @ 12wks 5d
08/29/13 - BFP @ 4wks 4d
09/17/13 - 7wks 2d - Normal HB Detected! Baby measuring perfect for dates and positioning!
10/23/13 - 12wks 3d - Perfect NT scan! HB 167 & baby wriggling, waving & yawning!
12/17/13 - 20wks 2 d - We're having a beautiful baby girl! Go Team Pink!
05/03/14 - Bobbie Gloria was born at 39+6 weighing 6lb 14oz!
And another one: I don't know how to word this exactly, but I sometimes feel like having a preemie is treated like NBD when it is a big deal. I get that no one wants the bejesus scared out of them while they are pregnant and a lot of people are just trying to be positive, but I also think giving every example of how a friend-of-a-friend had a 25 weeker who is now perfectly normal at 2 years old trivializes the fact that some preemies don't make it, others end up with delays and even in those who do great, the battle that his/her parents probably went through to get to that point is really tough.
YES. Holy cow. From some of the articles I've seen, when people started posting about v-day it actually got more scary for me, not less. Once I get to thirty weeks I'll feel much calmer. (Really, I'm hoping this one goes late too. Tiny regular-sized newborns seem completely intimidating to me.)
Re: UO
My little brother ad his "fiancé" are 19. They got "engaged" early last year after only dating about 8 months. Since the "engagement", they have broken up and gotten back together at least 3 times. Neither works, his fiancé basically came over to spend the night one night to my parent's house and never moved out, so they mooch off of my folks. They both started community college and then dropped out within a few weeks because neither would do homework or assignments while they were together. She does NOTHING at my parent's house to help out, she stalks my brother and cannot go more than an hour without some kind of contact with him, and when he worked with my dad and uncle, she drove 45 miles each way to have lunch with him every day.
They have no business being engaged and have no plans of leaving my parent's house and making it on their own, they have no wedding date picked out or intention of setting one, and anytime they call each other "fiancé", I eye roll so hard that I feel like I'm going to backflip.
I feel like my IQ has fallen about 20-30 points during both of my pregnancies and I can't remember anything. I often have to look up how to even spell basic words or will go into a room to do something and forget what I went in there to do. Just this morning, I went into my bathroom to make sure I had unplugged my chi and then once I got back downstairs, I could not remember if my chi was unplugged.
2011: FSH 13.3 & E 99; AMH 0.54 2nd FSH 6.2 E 40's AFC: 8
BFP from Clomid/IUI ~ Pre-e and IUGR during pregnancy ~ DS born 9/4/12
Feb./March 2013: AMH less than 0.16 (undectable) and AFC = 4;
BFP from supps ~ DS#2 due May 2014
May 2014 January Siggy Challenge:
2011: FSH 13.3 & E 99; AMH 0.54 2nd FSH 6.2 E 40's AFC: 8
BFP from Clomid/IUI ~ Pre-e and IUGR during pregnancy ~ DS born 9/4/12
Feb./March 2013: AMH less than 0.16 (undectable) and AFC = 4;
BFP from supps ~ DS#2 due May 2014
May 2014 January Siggy Challenge:
This^^^! I have a friend that switches diets every 10 minutes and tries to get people to do it with her so that she gets money off of her "shakes". (And does the every week side by side pics of her "progress")
Being health conscious and a scrutinizor of ingredients, I told her there was no way I was eating a soy based protein shake while TTC because too much soy can screw with hormone levels. I also warned her that with her having thyroid and PCOS issues, that the soy wasn't a good idea for her either. She gave the whole "well my cousin's aunt's dentist's sister has the same thing as me and she was fine" spiel and kept using them. Well, wouldn't you know it, a week or so later she posts this long post about how she got sick and started having major issues which her doctor said was directly due to the high levels of soy protein in the shakes! Shocker!
Also on the Social site front, I cannot stand the constant Check ins and play by plays of people's every move on IG and FB.
Shake chick from above does this to the point that every single person online could easily chart her weekly schedule, where she lives (she created a home check in with her specific address), and when she is and isn't home. When her husband left the country for a month, she constantly posted about him being gone for however long.
I seriously wanted to grab her by the hair and beat the stupid out of her. Everything she posts is public on both sites! Do people not realize that all it takes is one psychopath or nut job to stumble upon this information and "boom" instant easy target for burglary, home invasion, and/or stalking!?!
She seriously does not get the danger she puts herself in daily, and gets upset when we're out together and I untag myself from her check ins.
I think of it as if the person was bipolar, and they won't take their meds. Yes they are choosing not too, but there is something functionally different about their brain or whatever that doesn't allow them to think normally.
Btw I have a ton of personal experience with this if you're wondering and think maybe you should have gone to alanon. And I mean this in the nicest way possible. Not trying to be rude at all so please do not take it that way.
And to make it even better a lady said to me, "it never goes back to normal."
Please reassure me I will not feel this stupid for the rest of my life!
I'm sorry for the loss of your friend. My sister has been battling addiction for over ten years...with heroin being her drug of choice. It's taken quite the toll on our family. Even I can agree with your comment that it's infuriating to read every addict isn't really at fault. My sister has been in and out of rehab since 2005 and still goes back to the evil drugs. She's had the means and support networks to get her shit together...but just doesn't. I do think there's something wrong in that regard....she just can't handle the normal stresses of life that most of us deal with regularly. But in my opinion it's all a behavioral issue...not a "disease". The disease excuse is a cop out, IMO. I've seen her be clean and she's a different person so I know she can do it if she really tried.
BFP#1 - 11/27/09 EDD 8/5/10, DS1 arrived 7/24/10 via emergency c-section.
BFP#2 - 6/18/12 EDD 2/23/13, sweet baby girl born sleeping on 10/4/12 at 19 weeks, 3 days.
BFP #3 - 1/18/13 EDD 10/1/13, natural mc on 2/2/13 at 5 weeks, 4 days.
BFP #4 - 8/29/13 EDD 5/12/14, our sweet rainbow, DS2 born 4/29/14 via c-section
I actually totally agree with this. College isn't for everybody. There are so many jobs out there now that employers want a college degree for that years ago never would have required one because everyone is pushed to go to college and get that degree no matter what. Recently my company hired a new front desk admin assistant. she has her MASTERS. she answers phones, seats people in meeting rooms and gets them coffee. to think the amount she likely spent on that degree to now be getting talked down to and fetching those a-holes coffee makes me sad. and i know that's what she's dealing with because when i started here i did her job.
my husband never finished school, and i know it bothers him. but he's a union carpenter. he makes good money, has great benefits and actually enjoys his work. he served in the airforce, travelled a bunch and is well read, but he beats himself up because he doesn't have a degree. his brother is also a carpenter, and felt the same way about not finishing school. he went back part time at night to get that degree just to say he had it. and guess what he's doing now? still working as a union carpenter.
College is great, but i totally agree that unless you have a real idea what you want to do, and a plan for after, it's not for everyone. I have a journalism degree and am working in finance due to some dumb luck 9 years ago. i would never trade my college experience, because it was great, but there are times i wish i taken some time to figure out what i really wanted to do before i went. i'm lucky enough to have pretty minimal student loans, but i still have them and am paying for them!
BFP#1 - 11/27/09 EDD 8/5/10, DS1 arrived 7/24/10 via emergency c-section.
BFP#2 - 6/18/12 EDD 2/23/13, sweet baby girl born sleeping on 10/4/12 at 19 weeks, 3 days.
BFP #3 - 1/18/13 EDD 10/1/13, natural mc on 2/2/13 at 5 weeks, 4 days.
BFP #4 - 8/29/13 EDD 5/12/14, our sweet rainbow, DS2 born 4/29/14 via c-section
Again, I'm sorry for your loss and understand you've had your personal experiences with it, but I also just needed to counter this longheld stigma. It doesn't help.
You are right in all of this, especially the bolded. It's just so hard when it impacts your family and coming to the terms that they can't really help it is hard to swallow when you're being lied to over and over and over. It fu**ing sucks. It makes me really angry towards her and after helping clean up after her so many times I just feel beat up, used and taken advantage of. It makes me bitter and less understanding.
BFP#1 - 11/27/09 EDD 8/5/10, DS1 arrived 7/24/10 via emergency c-section.
BFP#2 - 6/18/12 EDD 2/23/13, sweet baby girl born sleeping on 10/4/12 at 19 weeks, 3 days.
BFP #3 - 1/18/13 EDD 10/1/13, natural mc on 2/2/13 at 5 weeks, 4 days.
BFP #4 - 8/29/13 EDD 5/12/14, our sweet rainbow, DS2 born 4/29/14 via c-section
I
Well said
I used to do this when I was getting into running, posting how far and times once or twice a week. The encouragement from friends and family helped a lot when it was hard, which is why I posted.
BFP#2 2.5.11 (EDD 10.15.11) DS born 9.28.11
BFP#4 8.27.13 (EDD 5.6.14) DD born 4.23.14
My Recipe Blog
~All AL'ers welcome~
Like I said, I can't imagine how hard it is to deal with such things on an intimate level and my heart breaks for those caught in the situation. Genuinely trying to understand it is gut-wrenching.
DD born 2/3/03
BFP 3/21/13 w/ EDD 12/02/13, C/P 3/29/13.
BFP 9/18/13 w/ EDD 5/26/14,
Beta #1 @ 14-16dpo = 375, progesterone 33.6
Beta #2 @ 20-22 dpo = 8,782!
Beta #3 @ 27-29dpo = 44,230, dx subchorionic hemorrhage/ threatened mc
Beta #4 @ 29-31dpo = 72, 080
Grow, little one, grow!
***** All AL Welcome *****
09/23/11 - Married DH
04/01/13 - BFP at 4wks
05/30/13 - MMC - BO @ 12wks 5d
08/29/13 - BFP @ 4wks 4d
09/17/13 - 7wks 2d - Normal HB Detected! Baby measuring perfect for dates and positioning!
10/23/13 - 12wks 3d - Perfect NT scan! HB 167 & baby wriggling, waving & yawning!
12/17/13 - 20wks 2 d - We're having a beautiful baby girl! Go Team Pink!
05/03/14 - Bobbie Gloria was born at 39+6 weighing 6lb 14oz!
I guess my UO is that I hate when people are all about eco-friendly but don't think about all aspects of why something should or shouldn't be thought of as "green".
Whoever said they feel perpetually dumb, I agree, I don't even think I made a real point in the above. UGH!
09/23/11 - Married DH
04/01/13 - BFP at 4wks
05/30/13 - MMC - BO @ 12wks 5d
08/29/13 - BFP @ 4wks 4d
09/17/13 - 7wks 2d - Normal HB Detected! Baby measuring perfect for dates and positioning!
10/23/13 - 12wks 3d - Perfect NT scan! HB 167 & baby wriggling, waving & yawning!
12/17/13 - 20wks 2 d - We're having a beautiful baby girl! Go Team Pink!
05/03/14 - Bobbie Gloria was born at 39+6 weighing 6lb 14oz!