Does your partner go to every appointment with you??

Eener31

My husband missed my first appointment because he was out of town, but he's gone with me to all the others. He works from home though, so that makes it a lot easier for him to come with me. He goes with me because he wants to....this is our first baby, so he doesn't want to miss anything!

allardr

DH went to most 1st time around. Except the last few weeks when I went twice a week for stress tests no reason for both of us to sit there for 45min watching tv. This time around I need him to come to watch DD at my visits. He has Mon/Tues off so I just schedule those days. He likes to be involved and I like the company since it's a 30min drive. 

alohababy14

Before he deployed, DH went to all of the appointments. I know it was hard for him to feel connected at first, but hearing the  heartbeat or even seeing the tiny blob on an ultrasound was huge for him. Now that he can't be there, I try to record the sound of the heartbeat or send him pictures from the u/s when I can!

emy730

So far, yes, but he won't be at the 16 week appointment because he has a work commitment he couldn't get out of

Teachermom09

He comes to ultrasounds. He is super weirded out by medical things and we were very surprised he made it through DS's birth with out passing out. So he just lets me do my thing and comes for the exciting/ fun stuff

LuluPMW

ghostof5letters said:

With our first, he only went to the first appointment and the ultrasounds. With this pregnancy, he hasn't been to an appointment yet. 

He works an hour away, and it's silly for him to take a half a day off from work just to go to a 15 minute (or less) appointment. 

ETA: I'm curious about the ones that are going to every single appointment. Do your SO's have jobs? Are they taking PTO or do they work flexible schedules or opposite schedules?

DH wants to go to as many as possible. He is the breadwinner but can either go to work early/late and leave early/late to work around appointments, so I let him schedule them. It helps that his manager also had IVF and understands the frequent apmts.

redhotmama7

Mine went to our first u/s and will go to the anatomy scan... That's about it until birth day!

drunkenhandstand

He tries. I honestly can care less if he comes. Not that I don't want him there... It's just this is our 3rd child and the routine appointments are so pointless to me. He works about 10 min from my OB and can usually swing it.

With our first, he never missed an appointment. It was cute. Lol

yurmom

DH is a SAHD so he could but then he'd have to bring DD and that is just exhausting for both of us.  He came to the first appt but had to leave after the US because DD was just too antsy.  He will come to the AS (my friend will watch DD). With our first he came to all at first but we had to wait so long and he would fall asleep in the waiting room so after awhile I just went by myself.

Kristen0705

My DH came to the 8 week and 12 week appointments. I told him to not bother coming to the 16 week appointment, but he was adamant he wanted to hear the heartbeat so I recorded it on my phone and sent it to him. He will definitely be coming to the a/s.

purpleXdandelion

4 pages, I thought there'd be some drama!

No he doesn't come to them with me. Just the u/s one and if he happens to have the day off. Which is SO rare especially now since it's tax season.

rjacques

My DH only went to the anatomy scan with DS and he will probably only go the anatomy scan with this one. He would like to be there but I don't think it is necessary. He will hear the heartbeat and see the LO at the scan. Plus my Doctor's office is always running late and his schedule is too crazy for him to wait for an hour tin the waiting room only to be seen by the doctor for about 10 minutes! 

[Deleted User]

SaraRL07 said:

Just curious for all you ladies whom said your SO came with you for all appointments...was he in the room when you received a pelvic exam?  I don't know why that was a problem for me since he will be in the delivery room in 9 months.

Honestly, I think DH would have been more bothered by the (male) doctor doing the breast exam, haha. 

I personally was weirded out by the photos of my doctor's teenage sons on the wall in the exam room. I felt like they were creeping on me as I got undressed.

pfeilele

He came to all but two with the first one. For this one, and the bad news we could very likely be given at each appointment, he will be going to them all. He would have anyways even if I wasn't high risk, but he likes to hear the heartbeat. He works second shift so it's pretty easy for us all to go to morning appointments. My OB likes to see DS as well

JMCB09

DH schedule rotates back and forth every week. When I schedule spots I do it when he's off. I wouldn't be offended if he didn't go, but he said he wants to.
I had a last minute appointment yesterday and he was working so he obviously didn't go, even though he talked about running over. I thought that was pointless.

saramfaria

My husband has only gone to the ultrasounds because we do not want him missing a lot of work. If he ever had the day off when I had an appointment he would come. I wish he could come to every appointment but we cannot have him miss too much work.

hupp0013

He has made it to most of my appointments, but he don't go to every check up either. It just worked out that way. He did go to every one with DD.

TricksyPixie

My husband wants to be at every single thing for me and baby, and I love having him there. He was so upset that my doctor couldn't fit me in on a day he had off on the last one, but his secretary assured us it was a temporary problem and it would be better next time (it is) but he was so upset he missed it and upset that he missed hearing baby kicking the Doppler. Which was hilarious.

Shelleybell

lindslalala said:

He did with our first, he hasn't been to any appointments this time. He'll probably just come to the anatomy scan appt this pregnancy.

this exactly lol 

girlmomi2j17

My husband couldn't go to the first appointment because he had class but my BFF was there. I was barely 5 weeks along so he didn't miss out on anything. He has been to all of them since along with my BFF. I'm so glad to have the support!!

ahjahbaba

Hy husband comes to all ultrasound appointments but not basic monthly check ins.
He will be at our Fetal Echo though as well...

Prncesta

DH comes to every appointment. This is our first child so he doesn't want to miss anything, which I completely understand. He has a pretty flexible job so luckily he isn't loosing any time at work for the appointments.

SweetTamale38

Yes.  This is his first, and he usually has questions.  Last year when we did this, we did get bad news, and it was nice having him by my side the whole time.  Even though we are doing well so far, I get really nervous before they enter the room, and he always keeps me smiling and positive.  His excitement is priceless to me.

katybug104

Both my DH and I commute to work, so it's an hour and a half drive for him up to my work. I work in healthcare & my doctor is right upstairs so it's very convenient for me. He's offered to come to any and all appts, but I don't want him driving that far for a 15 min appt. He's come to my ultrasound & to my first visit to meet the dr and hear the heartbeat for the first time.

katnipeverclean

He came to my first and second appointments. He skipped the one yesterday and he will come to the next one for the ultrasound.

EllaSmella

He went to the 12 week appointment and will come to the 20 week appt/ultrasound. Unless there's a reason for him to come to any after that, it will probably be the last one he comes to.

With our first, he went to 8 weeks, 12 weeks and 20 weeks. He works about 40 minutes away from my midwives, so it doesn't really make sense for him to come just for the routine visits.

aileenh863

Yes. He works from 330 am-130pm so I make my appt late in the day. He wants to be there as much as he can.

ashesandpearls

ghostof5letters said:

I'm curious about the ones that are going to every single appointment. Do your SO's have jobs? Are they taking PTO or do they work flexible schedules or opposite schedules?

My husband works an hour away from where we live. He goes to every appointment, we scheduel them based on when he is able to be out of his office. We are lucky, he is in a position to do that. It also helps that my scheduel is quite a bit lighter than his, so it is easy to find times that work for us both. On the one hand, I know we are lucky we have been able to arrange our lives this way, but it is also not an accident, we prioritize spending a great deal of time together and I can't imagine him not being at the appointments. I know not every couple can or would want to do things the way we do.

Millie2014

If the appointments are on the weekend he comes along. He came to first Ultrasound and will come to 20 week US too.

BoraBoraBaby

DH has been to all ultrasounds and our intake appointment. I had several Doppler appointments and because I had no signs of threatened mc I didn't feel he needed to be there. Now that I've joined the centering group and there's more education, he is going to try to make it to the rest of them.

MrsGeekyPants

The one time my husband couldnt go to my apt i ended up being told the baby stopped growing and had to have a dnc that day . He rushed from work the the dr. He felt terrible for not being there for me. Now he comes to every apointment and takes every opertunity to see our little bee growing .

BrookeOfLife212

M boyfriend has been to every appointment I've had so far and I'm just over 4 months.  I recently told him he doesnt have to come to every one, just the milestone ones from now on bc like you, I feel bad when it's just a quick 10 minute appt.  I say just let him know when the appts are and leave it up to him if he comes or not.  

strawberry825

Mine does but we only have one car so I just drop him off at work afterwards. He only works a few blocks from the hospital so it's not a big inconvenience.

slensic

No and he didn't the first time either. With DD he came to my first 2 ob appts. the first u/s @ 9weeks, and the a/s and that was it.

This time so far he has only come to our first u/s @ 7weeks. I have an u/s at 17 weeks and most likely will confirm the sex, so he will come to that one. He most likely won't come to the a/s this time unless there is a question about sex. I will have a RCS this time so I would like for him to come to a later ob appt. just so we can go over everything with my Dr. 

For both NT scans he hasn't been able to get off work so my mom has come with me for both. Since he won't come to the a/s this time, I was thinking about inviting my parents. My dad hasn't been to an u/s before so I thought this would be nice. 

abundancenow

No, he would not be able to take that much time from work. He came to a few appointments for ds#1, but not all. I personally prefer him not to be there at all my appointments because he masks fear with humor and it annoys me and I'd want to punch him, it's easier for me to relay updates afterwards.

CONativeGal

I invite my husband to all of mine with the disclaimer that he does not need to take the time if he is busy with work, but our OB is closer to his work than mine, so he has made every appointment. I'm PGAL, so I think when we are further along into the second trimester he may drop off on more appointments as they get more frequent and things continue to look good.

lauralynn710

Yes, since this is our first baby. We have made all of our appointment for Mondays (his day off) so he can come.

cayleighs

My DH comes to everyone, as long as he doesn't have an exam for school. Part if it is cause it's our first, partially since he wants to, and partially cause I want him too( especially if I have blood work done).