Nov13 Bringing the Advice

amberrrjade

Hello Nov14!

The BLAD-ass Nov13 Unicorns would like to welcome you to pregnancy. 

This thread will be a how-to on how to handle The Bump and your bump. 

**Idea kindly stolen from our dear loves in Oct13

amberrrjade

1. Morning sickness is normal. No one cares.

2. If you're really concerned call your doctor/midwife/doula/etc.

3. Google is NOT your friend. However sometimes helpful.

katie.725

First, Congratulations! Here are a couple of tips new momma's to be.

1. you'll be judged... get over it

2. The sun doesn't shine out of your ass...follow in our footsteps and make it a rainbow

3. Most importantly... save the medical questions for your OB/Midwife/Doula/Shaman. This is NOT a medical board.... 

4. Go with the flow... embrace the pregnancy symptoms and don't whine about them because everyone here is going through it and there will always be women out there wishing they could go through it

Best of Luck and of course

jaymayhatton

Congrats on your BFP Nov14!!!! 

You're just now starting the crazy ups and downs that come with pregnancy. At first you'll be like:

and this:

And also this:

But then you'll be like:

and this:

and if you're lucky, this:

Then you'll hit 3rd Tri and be like this:

and this:

Then comes labor and delivery which might go something like this:

Is this labor!?!

OMG it is labor!!!!

Holy hell contractions hurt!

Give me the Fing DRUGS!

That's good shit:

GET IT OUT!

But it will all be worth it in the end because you will finally meet that cute little squish!

And be like this:

TB is a great place to connect with women that are going through the same shit you are. Just a warning, you will run into a bunch of whack jobs and asshats:

Have some awesome gifs on queue to make weeding out said whack jobs and asshats entertaining:

And know that sometimes it is fun to feed the trolls:

You'll need to learn the acronyms ASAP!

You should also pick up a couple pregnancy books and educate yourself before you post something stupid:

Google can sometimes be your friend:

To make it through, you'll need a sense of humor:

And hopefully at the end of the ride, you'll have some amazing friends:

Good luck and we wish you a H&H 9 months!

Love The BLADS!

jaymayhatton

Oh and don't be a White Knight! 

Nobody likes that.

artistlife

Also, picking you mod is not a popularity contest. Pick someone who will be both fair and accomadating. You don't want one who will be a total dicktator. Yes, I spelled it like that on purpose. You DO want one who can join the fun, but keep it from being a complete circus full of freaks. Most of all pick one that will stick around and not be a flake. A reg is the best choice.

amberrrjade

When picking your labor buddy make sure you like them, make sure your due dates are spread out, and make sure they're kick ass. I STILL talk to my LB, she's a doll!

dnt27

CONGRATS ON YOUR BFP!!!

Don't tell lies....TB never forgets.




Flame the asshats.



You'll make life long friends here if you do it right


NO ONE cares about your baby shower. Really.
Or your maternity photo shoot.


Best of luck with your pregnancies! XOXO

amberrrjade

When and if you find out the SEX (not gender) of your child and you are upset, you should probably keep it to yourself. Because you will get flamed like hamburger meat.

Mailmans Baby Momma

All of my BLAD ladies have done an excellent job of keeping you in the good graces of your Nov 14 bumpies because, well, their BLADass.

I'll add...NEVER assume someone doesn't have a life because of the amount of posts they make. Maybe they're on bedrest. Maybe they've been on the bump for a while bc they've been TTC for so long.

You're either a SAHM mom or a working mom or about to become one and they're both equally awesome.

Never edit your post without writing what you did to change it, even if it's correcting grammar. And you will need to correct stuff when you're up at 2 am eating ice cream.

Know the difference between your and you're. Know the difference between there, they're, and their.

And for the love of all that is holy, USE PARAGRAPHS and punctuation.

You're welcome bumpies. Congrats and enjoy the ride...it's the best thing ever!

ranaverde

I'll toss in a few:

When the crazy appears, always, always quote for posterity.  You never know when they might try to delete it and pretend it never happened.

Badges are nifty!  Make some!  Stick them in your siggy!

Also:  you can never go wrong with unicorns.

SoSweetTea1124

Congrats Bumpies on your BFP!!! Just a few things from me that may help keep you in your other bumpies good graces!!

First and foremost, 99.9% of the people on here are not doctors! The ones that are are most likely not yours! If you have a health question call your OB/Midwife/Shaman/Doula etc...

You will most likely feel like shit for a while!! Embrace it, pretty much everyone else feels it too!

If your uterus feels stabby its probably RLP (Round Ligament Pain)! You will probably feel this your entire pregnancy...Pretty much call your doctor if you're worried:

Read a book (or 2 or 3) on pregnancy... It can't hurt and may answer a lot of questions for you

Dont just post questions, contribute to your BMB! No one will like you, care what you ask, or comment in general once you are found out! You won't win points with anyone by being selfish

If you happen to ask a super dumb question and get flamed for it don't run to another board seeking sympathy, people will ferret you out and you will be sorry!

Do not fall on your sword in defense of an idiot(white knighting), you will join their ranks and people will hate you. 

Most of the people on here will annoy the shit out of you, but after a while you will recognize them and use their posts for your own personal amusement!

 

people will get into fights and disagreements, just pull up a chair, grab some popcorn and enjoy the ride! 

Have fun ladies!! Don't say you weren't warned! 

SoSweetTea1124

Oh also, No one wants to see your mucus plug!

amberrrjade

GOBLU1274 said:

@mishkaroni thank you for bringing up the whole baby name thing. If you insist on asking complete strangers to name your LO, park your ass on the Baby Names board. Your BMB don't give a fuck if you name your child Hayden or Jayden, they also don't give a shit how you spell it.

But be warned the Baby Names board will fuck your shit up if you try to spell Anna like Annnah and they hate names with "anal" in them. GOOD LUCK!

LoveOfMikesLife

chelsiechristine said:

::popping in while laughing hysterically:: just to say...& now you know why all the BLADS stick together...we're freaking hilarious! )

Who are you again?

jaymayhatton

chelsiechristine said:

::popping in while laughing hysterically:: just to say...& now you know why all the BLADS stick together...we're freaking hilarious! )

amberrrjade

Wow! These are so beautiful! You are the most beautiful girl on the Bump. They are sophisticated but they also say "don't get too close." Thank you so much for sharing. Do you mind if I print these out and use them as my inspiration post-baby?

@cfox815

LoveOfMikesLife

@amberrrjade! I need a heads up on funny shit like that next time! I seriously dribbled in my pants I laughed so hard!

klunacat

amberrrjade

klunacat said:

PrimRoseMama

I've got a serious bump boner for November 2013. =P~

barackollama

HilarityEnsued said:

Lol these threads are hilarious. ZOMG you have been on a BMB for a whole year and therefore know ALL THE THINGS...

Agreed. I'm annoyed they want to tell us how to run our board.

DoubleUp8

Ditto @mrsmechanic1

mrsodonnell12

mrsmechanic1 said:

most of the things theyve said are general bump rules. and im going to flame the shit out of you if you take a pic of your mucus plug.

Wait you don't want to see my mucus plus? What about my placenta? bahahaha!

barackollama

Yeah, I know the general tone of the site. I just don't understand why they felt entitled to make a two page post on our page. It's more self congratulatory than helpful. Or do they not think we could have figured out what's annoying without their help?

SoSweetTea1124

@PrincessPetunias don't get your panties in a twist. We did it to hopefully spare you all some of the torture and torment that we went through while dealing with the abundance of dumb asses that flock to this site. It was merely meant as a helpful guide to those that may not have the mental capability to pick up on TB social cues. So ....

and 

fitmama418

PrincessPetunias said:

Yeah, I know the general tone of the site. I just don't understand why they felt entitled to make a two page post on our page. It's more self congratulatory than helpful. Or do they not think we could have figured out what's annoying without their help?

...Most of the gifs were hilarious and many of them even came off as supportive. Which I believe was OP's original intent; to say "welcome to pregnancy land...we're so pumped for you."

OP I CALLED YOU OP!!! SEE WHAT I DID THERE?!?!?

amberrrjade

Seriously a bunch of hating jerks right now. Did you ever think it was also a nice guide for people who haven't been apart of TheBump before? Keep hating, I can see Nov 14 won't be nearly as awesome as Nov 13. Excuse for celebrating your BFP with some humor.

katie.725

I wonder if they too feel bad for our Husband's and children....

barackollama

Whatever people. After two pages of your opinions I made a post of my own.

katie.725

rczamora said:

Holy fuck nuts, n13. chill out. not your board. we can handle our own here, don't worry about it. i do believe it had died until you all came back and made a huge deal out of nothing.

Edit:  words.

Actually it died on Feb 6, and you guys resurrected it on Feb 23. Oh, wait, that was yesterday. When YOU guys made an issue out of it. Like my fellow N13-ers said, it was all in good fun. And you're like 2 seconds pregnant, shouldn't you be stuck with your head in the toilet and spending the rest of your time sleeping because you're so exhausted? Now I'm going to trot back over to N13 where the girls actually appreciate a good joke.

GopherBaby13

No one on this board has a sense of humor. I feel bad for y'all. It's going to be a LONG nine months!

ranaverde

PrincessPetunias said:

Lol these threads are hilarious. ZOMG you have been on a BMB for a whole year and therefore know ALL THE THINGS...

Agreed. I'm annoyed they want to tell us how to run our board.

Man, I wasted a unicorn gif for this?  I thought I was being nice.  ::shaking my head::

ranaverde

mrsmechanic1 said:

No one had posted on it since yesterday, but this morning you decided to bring it up again.  You must not be able to read because I'm the one that had told the ladies that posted before me that you all were warranted in posting a sticky.  You guys then proceeded to bring it back up.  It was handled.  From within.  We appreciate the gifs, laughs, and advice.  Now leave it be and quit looking for trouble.

You do realize that at this point we all have infants and aren't checking the Bump as often as you are, right?

katie.725

but @mrsmechanic1

ranaverde

mrsmechanic1 said:

ranaverde said:

mrsmechanic1 said:

No one had posted on it since yesterday, but this morning you decided to bring it up again.  You must not be able to read because I'm the one that had told the ladies that posted before me that you all were warranted in posting a sticky.  You guys then proceeded to bring it back up.  It was handled.  From within.  We appreciate the gifs, laughs, and advice.  Now leave it be and quit looking for trouble.

You do realize that at this point we all have infants and aren't checking the Bump as often as you are, right?

And again, shit was taken care of.  You needn't have bothered posting.  Would have saved you more time to creep other parts of TB and/or spend with that beautiful infant you have.

Wow.

katie.725

So we're just gonna chalk all this up to you Nov 14's being in such a state

lamo1210

Guys... They got this! They have a nov 14 check in.........

But I think they need more check ins. Just sayin!

alexisjo88

mrsmechanic1 said:

ranaverde said:

mrsmechanic1 said:

No one had posted on it since yesterday, but this morning you decided to bring it up again.  You must not be able to read because I'm the one that had told the ladies that posted before me that you all were warranted in posting a sticky.  You guys then proceeded to bring it back up.  It was handled.  From within.  We appreciate the gifs, laughs, and advice.  Now leave it be and quit looking for trouble.

You do realize that at this point we all have infants and aren't checking the Bump as often as you are, right?

And again, shit was taken care of.  You needn't have bothered posting.  Would have saved you more time to creep other parts of TB and/or spend with that beautiful infant you have.

Shit is never taken care of. If you want a private party go elsewhere. This is an open forum, get over it. BTW, your post makes absolutely no sense. Can you try formulating a full, coherent sentence?

jaztastic

(LURKER COMING OUT)...FWIW I tagged this post because I thought it was really cool what N13 did for N14 and planned to steal it for whatever it BMB I end up on (Praying D14). Not that I'm trying to take sides or anything. 

But carry on, Im totally entertained...shit never gets this good over on IF or 3T! 

fitmama418

jaztaz1 said:

(LURKER COMING OUT)...FWIW I tagged this post because I thought it was really cool what N13 did for N14 and planned to steal it for whatever it BMB I end up on (Praying D14). Not that I'm trying to take sides or anything. 

But carry on, Im totally entertained...shit never gets this good over on IF or 3T! 

SEE N14?!

RESPECT.



NATCH.