@animator_mama glad you called! You’ll never regret being extra cautious and who cares what anyone thinks. I called a ton with my first pregnancy, god forbid there had been something I wasn’t taking a chance with his life
Anyone else thinking of putting a gift under the tree for baby at Christmas time? I was thinking it might be fun for the girls to open a gift for baby (if I get that far)? Maybe start getting them excited about it?
Has anyone else felt "occasional" movement? I have had flutter-like feelings here and there since 13 weeks, but its hard to tell if it's actually baby or not and I only feel them every once in a great while. For the life of me I can't remember what my pregnancy with DS was like this early on, so I can't remember if I had a similar thing happened. With him. Thanks!
@brianalee9757 Yes! I've been feeling...something? But definitely not consistent and definitely not convinced it's baby...I had the same with DD2 but I was much more certain what I was feeling was baby. I think since I'm so much sicker this time I'm not sure if it's just the movement of my tummy issues I'm feeling.
@brianalee9757 I'm feeling something too! Definitely not kicks but flutters. I'm 16 weeks. I didn't feel movement until around 20 weeks with my first. I do second guess sometimes if it is actually the baby or gas bubbles though 😂.
I'm 14+5 and I thought i felt baby roll the other day. Nothing consistent but didn't seem to be gas. Maybe wishful thinking on my part though 🤷♀️ Had an ultrasound at 11+5 due to SCH scare and seen baby dancing around in there so maybe its just in my head but there's been a couple times I thought I've felt a flutter
@friends-fan i had the EXACT same thing happen at 11+4. It was so scary but everything was fine. I swear the time between a positive pregnancy test and feeling consistent movement is so nerve wracking!
@brianalee9757 yes, I've been feeling little bits of movement since 12 weeks. It's not consistent, but it's definitely baby. Baby went crazy when I had a warm bath the other night. Haha. I'm looking forward to a few weeks when it's regular, and I can feel it on the outside too. I want that reassurance!
Has anyone experienced going to routine checkups after 12 weeks and the nurses/mid wives not being able to pick up baby's heart rate?
With my first they had difficulties and had to do an ultrasound and this is my 3rd pregnancy and the same thing keeps happening. Baby is always fine with a high heart rate, but they just always have to do an ultrasound (not complaining). I just wanted to know if anyone else has had this same experience?
@mclove5894 my OB has always struggled too and she says it’s largely because I have a tilted uterus. Plus I’m overweight which probably doesn’t help (but she doesn’t mention that, bless her). Do you know if your uterus is tilted? It’s pretty common.
@mclove5894 This has always happened to me in early pregnancy. My midwife explained to me that it's because of exactly what @rachelredhead said: my uterus tilts backward, so it's just harder for the doppler to catch until the baby is bigger. Once I learned that there was a physiological reason, and that this is just how my body works, it was much easier for me to accept. I've just kind of let go of the expectation that I'll be able to hear the heartbeat until later.
@jessier19 it helped me SO MUCH to know my uterus is tilted. Just the way my body is put together, no harm to baby or mama, just means baby gets to be shy a little longer.
@mclove5894 My OB doesn't even try Doppler until 14 weeks, so I would try not to worry too much about them not being able to find it ❤️ He tried for me at like.. 13+3 and couldn't find it. I briefly panicked, given my history, but baby was there, dancing on US.
Ok...what are people's opinions on what I should do?... (TLDR at bottom)
RE: Finding out baby's sex.
I've always loved the idea of being team green, and LOVED it with DS.
I WANT to be team green. But I have always wanted a daughter. And for some reason I keep thinking this baby is a girl. DH says this is our last baby. So if it's a boy, I have to adjust to never having a daughter. (AND adjust to spending this pregnancy thinking "girl").
I don't want gender disappointment when baby is born. I KNOW how badly I struggled with PP hormones last time, and I don't want to "resent" baby (however briefly) if it's a boy. So I'm considering asking at the anatomy scan. (I know they won't tell me, the OB would tell me in the office when I go for the results a few weeks later).
But that is such a lame way to find out. I feel like it's anticlimactic to just be told "yea, it's a **", and worry that I'm going to be SO disappointed to miss out on the fun announcement after the struggle of birthing my baby.
PLUS, I know multiple people who were in that "margin of error" where the US gets it wrong, so they THINK they are having one, but turns out it's the opposite. That would seriously mess with me.
TLDR: part of me wants to find out the sex, for my mental health, but I'm worried I will regret it, and I can't take it back once I find out.
@goldfishcraker If you’re worried about gender disappointment, I would try to find out. With my son, I was so hopeful for a girl and went through brief gender disappointment because he was an obvious boy on US. It helped to be able to deal with those feelings and come to acceptance during second trimester. He’s the light of my life now and DH and I wouldn’t trade him for the world, it just took us a few days to adjust because both of us had longed so badly for a daughter (and now we have one on the way). Some babies there’s no mistaking it and usually your doc and US tech will be very confident if that’s the case.
That said, it’s a personal decision and totally up to you, but I wish you all the best.
@goldfishcraker I would lean toward finding out at the anatomy scan if you think you might have some gender disappoinment. That will give you some time to adjust to the news. I've never been team green and it was still a wonderful surprise both times. I don't think it is anticlimactic at all! I wouldn't worry about that part.
Thanks ladies! Yea, the reason I have been leaning toward finding out, is that it would give me time to adjust before the PP hormones and pain/exhaustion from L&D kick in.
Because I KNOW I will be so in love with baby, either way. (I already am!). And I wouldn't change DS for the world. (And as soon as DH and I agreed on a name, I forgot all about my fears when DH held DS up and I saw he was a boy 😂). And recently, I remembered how I felt in that moment, and I laughed, because DS is so perfect!
I just..didn't anticipate the severe PPA I experienced last time. And I want to make sure I take care of my mental health the best I can this time..
I just wish I could at least do something..fun. like a cupcake, to find out. but finding a bakery who will make 1, gender reveal, egg free cupcake...(that isn't exorbitantly expensive) has proven impossible haha. (And I can't have someone I know make it, because I would be the only person to know before baby is born).
@goldfishcraker *lurking from April BMB* we just went through all the permutations of how to have a low key sex reveal with as few people knowing as possible. (Used Peekaboo blood test)
You could bake your own two cupcakes, one pink and one blue, with a removable label on the outside of each box. Have a random stranger (or your doctor?) mark the cupcake box to open and remove the labels.
We basically did the same thing with colored bath bombs from Etsy and MIL gave us the correct one to use and removed the label.
@goldfishcraker With my first I took the results to the store and picked our a blue and pink onesie. I let the cashier open the results and I turned away and she rang up and put whatever color onesie in the bag. Then DH and I opened it together. It was super low key but still fun for us!
@goldfishcraker As someone who has never been team green, I can say that finding out the sex has never been anticlimactic for me:) DD1 I found out at the anatomy scan, DD2 I found out at an appointment after my NIPT, and this one by phone. I've always found out on my own and actually love being the first person to know the results before anyone else. However, I have friends who have remained team green specifically because of the fear of gender disappointment...their argument was how could they possibly be disappointed when seeing that beautiful little face for the first time. Honestly I don't know that there is a perfect solution, and I would go with your gut. If you feel better about being team green then I would stay green only because I would hate for you to regret finding out if in your heart you really want to wait ❤
@goldfishcraker I was so sure this baby was a girl and both H and I desperately wanted a daughter, for me I had a lot of gender disappointment and am glad I’ve had time to adjust, but I’ve also never been team green. I just think for me postpartum is hard enough and I wouldn’t want to add the disappointment into the mix then. Also, I really really love @kgg2241 gender reveal, that must have been so fun for the cashier too!
ETA- @goldfishcraker I would definitely find out. I had the girl at party city fill up a large black balloon with pink or blue confetti and gave her the results. It was easy and cheap lol I thought it was a girl for both of my boys and this time I was really feeling like it was a girl and it was. the only thing that’s different for me this time around is that I’m not as hungry as I was with the boys and I’ve actually lost weight instead of gained. I gained a lot with both boys.
Question relating to sleeping arrangements: My MIL gave me a crib/toddler bed mattress that is completely unused with the intent it could be used for DS when the baby girl is ready to go in crib(We plan to have her in a pack and play bassinet in our room for her first few months.) Problem is the mattress from MIL while unused, was stored in her house in a guest room for a few years as she had gotten it for my SIL with her first child, but she declined. MIL’s husband smokes like a chimney so even if things aren’t directly near him, everything in that house smells heavily of cigarette smoke. The mattress is here now, because MIL got excited to help and it’s making my whole kitchen stink of smoke and making me feel kind of sick ^^; Want to try to salvage if I can because MIL is always so sweet and helpful and I don’t want to seem ungrateful.
Does anyone know how to remove the smell of cigarettes from a mattress? Can’t easily air it out as I live in an apartment complex (limited outdoor space is ours) and it’s supposed to pretty much rain off and on all week.
Any tips helpful, currently sprayed it in a mix of white vinegar and water.
@faithmovesmountains oh yuck. I’m no help. Would it be easy to buy a replacement that looks the same? Then just toss the smoky one and tell her the one you bought is the one she gave you?
Thanks so much ladies! I LOVE these ideas and the insight!🥰
@MusicalFamily with DS I had brutal Heartburn throughout (ended up having to go on meds), and extreme food aversions, daily nausea through the first tri, and fatigue to the point of narcolepsy (I would literally fall asleep in the middle of a sentence, sitting up eating dinner). And I feel so completely different this time, which I think is why my brain keeps insisting this one is a girl. 😅 I keep trying to tell myself it doesn't mean anything and that every pregnancy is different regardless. But I'm failing at convincing myself haha. Which is what would make it a shock after delivery I think.
@faithmovesmountains I agree with the suggestion to toss it and get a new one. There is no way to get those chemicals out of a mattress and not worth having baby breath em in
@faithmovesmountains not worth the risk in my opinion. I would definitely toss it and buy the same exact one new so she would never know. I hate upsetting people too- especially people I love and who have good intentions, but you have to protect your babies.
@faithmovesmountains I agree with the other previous comments. There is no effective way to remove the smell, chemicals, and risk from third-hand smoke from the mattress. You might even consider getting rid of it ASAP to protect you from exposure to third-hand smoke as well. Maybe you can tell your MIL you are ‘sending it to the professional cleaners’ which would explain it’s absence from your home while you search for a similar replacement?
Thanks everyone. I was worried that might be the only solution, but I figured I’d ask in case there was something I wasn’t aware of. DH and I will just have to budget it in.
Is it too early to start checking the babies heart rate at home?? I don’t have another ultrasound for a few weeks and would love to hear the heart beat again. Im 16 weeks + 1 today.
@mandaleigh2015 I think second tri and beyond is good for using a home Doppler because you can usually find the heartbeat faster than in 1st tri. I know for me the Doppler can add to my anxiety sometimes so I try to limit myself to once a week if necessary. My batteries ran out a few weeks ago and I’m trying to avoid refreshing them. 😃
@mandaleigh2015 not too early at all. I have been using it since 10/11 weeks. Just start really low and know if you pick up a heartbeat less than 130ish it’s probably your own. I’ve found that having a full bladder helps me find it quicker as it pushes your uterus up a little bit higher.
17 weeks 4 days today. I had the AFP blood draw today at my OB appointment. What to expect? STM, but I had a family Dr with DD1 and never was offered testing of any kind that I was aware of. (I'm also 34 this time around, maybe is why?) I'm nervous now awaiting results. The nurse told me it takes about a week and no news is good news.
Re: The Great Question Thread
It's not consistent, but it's definitely baby. Baby went crazy when I had a warm bath the other night. Haha. I'm looking forward to a few weeks when it's regular, and I can feel it on the outside too. I want that reassurance!
My OB doesn't even try Doppler until 14 weeks, so I would try not to worry too much about them not being able to find it ❤️ He tried for me at like.. 13+3 and couldn't find it. I briefly panicked, given my history, but baby was there, dancing on US.
(TLDR at bottom)
RE: Finding out baby's sex.
I've always loved the idea of being team green, and LOVED it with DS.
I WANT to be team green.
But I have always wanted a daughter. And for some reason I keep thinking this baby is a girl. DH says this is our last baby. So if it's a boy, I have to adjust to never having a daughter. (AND adjust to spending this pregnancy thinking "girl").
I don't want gender disappointment when baby is born. I KNOW how badly I struggled with PP hormones last time, and I don't want to "resent" baby (however briefly) if it's a boy.
So I'm considering asking at the anatomy scan. (I know they won't tell me, the OB would tell me in the office when I go for the results a few weeks later).
But that is such a lame way to find out. I feel like it's anticlimactic to just be told "yea, it's a **", and worry that I'm going to be SO disappointed to miss out on the fun announcement after the struggle of birthing my baby.
PLUS, I know multiple people who were in that "margin of error" where the US gets it wrong, so they THINK they are having one, but turns out it's the opposite. That would seriously mess with me.
TLDR: part of me wants to find out the sex, for my mental health, but I'm worried I will regret it, and I can't take it back once I find out.
If you’re worried about gender disappointment, I would try to find out. With my son, I was so hopeful for a girl and went through brief gender disappointment because he was an obvious boy on US. It helped to be able to deal with those feelings and come to acceptance during second trimester.
He’s the light of my life now and DH and I wouldn’t trade him for the world, it just took us a few days to adjust because both of us had longed so badly for a daughter (and now we have one on the way).
Some babies there’s no mistaking it and usually your doc and US tech will be very confident if that’s the case.
That said, it’s a personal decision and totally up to you, but I wish you all the best.
Yea, the reason I have been leaning toward finding out, is that it would give me time to adjust before the PP hormones and pain/exhaustion from L&D kick in.
Because I KNOW I will be so in love with baby, either way. (I already am!). And I wouldn't change DS for the world. (And as soon as DH and I agreed on a name, I forgot all about my fears when DH held DS up and I saw he was a boy 😂).
And recently, I remembered how I felt in that moment, and I laughed, because DS is so perfect!
I just..didn't anticipate the severe PPA I experienced last time. And I want to make sure I take care of my mental health the best I can this time..
I just wish I could at least do something..fun. like a cupcake, to find out. but finding a bakery who will make 1, gender reveal, egg free cupcake...(that isn't exorbitantly expensive) has proven impossible haha.
(And I can't have someone I know make it, because I would be the only person to know before baby is born).
You could bake your own two cupcakes, one pink and one blue, with a removable label on the outside of each box. Have a random stranger (or your doctor?) mark the cupcake box to open and remove the labels.
We basically did the same thing with colored bath bombs from Etsy and MIL gave us the correct one to use and removed the label.
My MIL gave me a crib/toddler bed mattress that is completely unused with the intent it could be used for DS when the baby girl is ready to go in crib(We plan to have her in a pack and play bassinet in our room for her first few months.)
Problem is the mattress from MIL while unused, was stored in her house in a guest room for a few years as she had gotten it for my SIL with her first child, but she declined. MIL’s husband smokes like a chimney so even if things aren’t directly near him, everything in that house smells heavily of cigarette smoke.
The mattress is here now, because MIL got excited to help and it’s making my whole kitchen stink of smoke and making me feel kind of sick ^^;
Want to try to salvage if I can because MIL is always so sweet and helpful and I don’t want to seem ungrateful.
Does anyone know how to remove the smell of cigarettes from a mattress?
Can’t easily air it out as I live in an apartment complex (limited outdoor space is ours) and it’s supposed to pretty much rain off and on all week.
Any tips helpful, currently sprayed it in a mix of white vinegar and water.
@MusicalFamily with DS I had brutal Heartburn throughout (ended up having to go on meds), and extreme food aversions, daily nausea through the first tri, and fatigue to the point of narcolepsy (I would literally fall asleep in the middle of a sentence, sitting up eating dinner). And I feel so completely different this time, which I think is why my brain keeps insisting this one is a girl. 😅 I keep trying to tell myself it doesn't mean anything and that every pregnancy is different regardless. But I'm failing at convincing myself haha. Which is what would make it a shock after delivery I think.
I was worried that might be the only solution, but I figured I’d ask in case there was something I wasn’t aware of.
DH and I will just have to budget it in.