I started hypnobabies two weeks ago and last week I totally failed to do much of the work so I’m redoing week 2 this week. Anyone else thinking of or planning doing hypnobabies? I started early because last time I felt like I could have used the extra practice. I only used it with DS2, not DS1. I really liked it.
@_orchid_ I’m sorry you are going through all that, it’s great that you have family coming to help.
@mindyb2019 With DD I had that happen often (like several times a week). For me, I think it was related to the terrible acid reflux I was having. It’s super scary when that happens.
@Omie_Wise - I think I am. We are going to purchase the home study with the workbook,etc. I also downloaded the Expectful app to help, which I think collabs with hypnobirthing. I didn’t realize I had birth trauma from my last that I need to work through, but oooh doggy. LOL!
Married August 2010 DD1 August 2011 DD2 August 2013 DD3 February 2017
@Omie_Wise I was actually thinking about that on my way home today. I probably should decide soon though.
@mindyb2019 that sounds terrifying! It definitely could have been because you were on your back. Like others have said, maybe try to wedge something on either side so you don’t accidentally roll to your back.
@disgruntled_pelican congratulations!! So exciting! I hope you hear about the other job before your noon cutoff so you can make a choice between the two.
@klj0228 - I heard back and they offered the job, but the pay is way less. Like, less than I make now. I’m pretty bummed and didn’t realize how much I wanted *that* job until I saw that number that I couldn’t make work or conscientiously negotiate up.
Married August 2010 DD1 August 2011 DD2 August 2013 DD3 February 2017
@mc0303 - job 1 is a 50% raise for me. I’d be okay with taking less but it’d be 31% more than they offered. I feel like that’s a big negotiation! Especially considering it’s all on soft money.
Married August 2010 DD1 August 2011 DD2 August 2013 DD3 February 2017
@disgruntled_pelican I’ve asked for much more before and gotten close to what I wanted. It’s awkward as hell. What’s the worse that can happen? They say no?
Say you love the job and how you’d be great at it and all but you were surprised about the compensation. Say you were surprised because it’s a bit lower than other opportunities you’ve been exploring and ask whether they’d be able to come up to XYZ. Ask for 5-10k over your walk away price. And say that it would go a long way.
And say if we could figure out this one item, I’d be comfortable pulling all my other opportunities off the table. How can we work together so the compensation fully meets my expectations.
And if they say no, ask about any other creative solutions that might be available...more vacation?
Don’t sell yourself short! They liked you for the job! You’re an asset and deserve market rate for your compensation.
@disgruntled_pelican agree with @mc0303! Know your worth and fight for the market salary for your skills. I’ve seen companies lowball in their initial offers with anticipation of negotiating and the prospect ends up accepting it anyway, which is a sweet deal for the company.
@disgruntled_pelican yay for two offers. I like @mc0303 advice and words of encouragement, DH reminds me a lot that women are notoriously bad at negotiating and selling their worth. The worst that could happen is they say no. I would try to negotiate a little on the other job too if that’s the one you decide to go with. Just because they are almost definitely not offering what they can.
@klj0228 I hope you can work it out. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect to be paid at least what you’re making. Definitely negotiate! DH hires people and had an employee (male) that negotiated hard for a lot of money and he eventually got it. He did end up firing him eventually because the guy wasn’t performing at the level of his negotiated pay.
@disgruntled_pelican Totally agree with trying to negotiate. What's the worst that could happen, then say no? Then you're in the same boat you are now. Particularly since this is lower than what you're currently making it's more than justified, you're not pulling a number out of thin air. @mc0303 has great advice, agree with everything she said. Speaking from the other side, we'd much rather our preferred candidate ask us about increasing the compensation than just have them turn us down. We can't always make it as high as they'd like, but have definitely tried to see what we can do for the right person (and this is in government, where we're far more limited on what we can actually offer)
Well, I intended on sending her the email by 7 AM but waffled over it all morning. It was sent by 10:45. I was honest with her and told her my minimum. It’s hard because I connect with people very deeply (that sounds hokey) and especially connected with her and her team. I did not want to ruin any of that and also just kind of felt like a d!ck. Anyway, that part is done. We will see what happens. Thank you all for the encouragement! The funny thing is that I’m always the person who is like NEGOTIATE YOUR SALARY! to everyone else and here I am with my tail between my legs!
Married August 2010 DD1 August 2011 DD2 August 2013 DD3 February 2017
Oh and @akoros - that was what I told myself. I value being a very honest person and combined with I felt like a really good fit for the position, I didn’t want to leave a stone unturned for her or mysef.
Married August 2010 DD1 August 2011 DD2 August 2013 DD3 February 2017
@disgruntled_pelican Congrats on the second offer! And I think it's great that you told her what you need. It may or may not work out, but if it doesn't, at least you can walk away knowing you gave it your best! Let us know what she says and GOOD LUCK!
Me: 32 years old
DH: 33 years old
Married in May 16, 2015
TTC #1 (on and off) since September 2015 DS1 Due 6.7.2021
@mindyb2019 Fwiw I've got some heartburn today and at times I've felt like my throat is totally blocked for a second or two. Particularly if I bend down or compress my stomach (like sitting forward). For me I don't get much actual burn, just feel incredibly full and like there's something in my throat
Omg, I had the best day today 🥰 Today I had my big gender reveal party for the senior residents that I work with at the care home. It was sooo much fun and they loved it! I got to decorate and we had cute pink and blue cupcakes and mimosas for them (sadly I couldn't drink one 😆) we did some fun games and then for the big reveal I dropped a plain white scented bath bomb in the big glass bowl and it took a minute for the water to change blue or pink. It was awesome and they all clapped and cheered when it turned blue.
Updates updates: she got back to me and could not hit my minimum. I had to turn it down and I’m kind of crushed. She worked hard to get it increased (all through university so there are certain equity issues) but she couldn’t. It was so hard to turn down because I could tell she really wanted me to work there. But, I will be happy with the other position, I am ready to move on! Next tricky bit is telling my current boss, but then it’s over
On another random note- about a month ago I saw a chiropractor that sexually harassed me- all verbal. It was a really rough time and I hemmed and hawed over reporting and eventually jus swept it under the rug. Today, a local woman posted a similar experience on Facebook and it’s been making rounds. I contacted her and we are pursuing a joint complaint with 13 other women.
My brain has been doing a lot of gymnastics, I am sorry for being a discussion hog!
Married August 2010 DD1 August 2011 DD2 August 2013 DD3 February 2017
@disgruntled_pelican omg thats horrible. So sorry that happened to you ling with 13 other ladies. Thats disgusting! Also, sorry you had to turn down that job offer that sucks. I hope it all works out with the other position though. Best of luck!
@disgruntled_pelican Sorry that you had to turn down what seemed like a great job but at least you know for sure they couldn’t meet your minimum. Some things weren’t meant to be!
And what happened to you is terrible, plus the other women! I’m glad someone spoke up and hope justice is served.
@mindyb2019 your work seems so fun, I’m jealous. The residents must’ve loved being part of the gender reveal. And those cupcakes look soo good (that’s my sweet tooth talking)
@disgruntled_pelican sorry about the job - but I’m glad you walked away since it didn’t even hit your minimum. And OMG I am so sorry this happened to you at the chiropractor! I am glad that you have 13 other people are pursuing a joint compliant. What a monster. Are you open to therapy about it? Experiences like that can really linger.
@wendy838 my work is fun! I love my job so much 😁 The residents LOVED it so much and had a blast today. They love being part of things like that. It was there first gender reveal party so they didn't quite understand why you don't bring gifts and thought it was like a baby shower 😆 Also, those cupcakes were damn tasty 😋 They were super sweet but oh so good with the icing. I've been craving sweets lately and they definitely hit the spot lol
@mindyb2019 that looks like lots of fun. I bet the residents loved getting to share that time with you. I’m sure through the pandemic the staff there has become even more like family than ever before.
@disgruntled_pelican sorry they couldn’t meet your minimum, but I’m so glad you at least tried. Now you won’t wonder what could have been had you just asked for more. Also, so sorry you and so many other women were harassed. Way to go reaching out to the other person so you all as a group can file a complaint.
@disgruntled_pelican I'm so sorry you wen through that with your chiropractor. Thank you for being brave enough to stand up to him. Congratulations on the new job, even if it is not your top choice!
~~Signature~~
Me: 36, DH: 38, Together since: 2006, Married: 9/2011 **TW Living Child**
@disgruntled_pelican holy sh*t. 13 women!? I’m so sorry you went through that. Also super skeevy that it’s a chiropractor and they usually have their hands all over you. Sounds like that dude is a predator and it would only be a matter of time before it became physical and worse.
Btw congrats about the job, sorry the other one couldn’t meet your needs.
@mindyb2019 how exciting! MHs grandma was in an assisted living and LOVED things like that.
@disgruntled_pelican I am sorry about the one job not being able to meet your minimum but congrats on the other! And wow I am so sorry to hear about your experience but am so glad you connected with those other victims and are going to take action. What an incredible violation of patients who entrusted him with their bodies. I hope you are talking to someone about it as needed. ❤️
*TTC History*
Me: 37, MH: 38; Married August 2017
TTC #1 October 2017: BFP on 12/1/2017, DD born 7/24/2018 @ 37+1 after induction due to preeclampsia
TTC #2 January 2020: AMA, dx with DOR in May 2020
IVF July 2020: 16 eggs retrieved, 14 mature, 12 fertilized, 3 blasts, 2 PGT-A normal
FET 10/7/20: BFP on 10/12/20!!! (EDD 6/25/21); First beta 10/16/20 (9dpt): 148; Second beta 10/19/20 (12dpt): 621; Third beta 10/26/20 (19dpt): 4732; Fourth (and final!) beta 11/2/20 (26 dpt): 22,000+
We were instructed by the AG office to file individual reports. I’ve filed mine. The woman who made the original Facebook post says she has been contacted by dozens of women, she has now lost count, with similar experiences. Her post has been up for less than a full day. The chiropractor closed his office today and tomorrow. There have been accusations of the women coming forward lying. It’s very frustrating.
Married August 2010 DD1 August 2011 DD2 August 2013 DD3 February 2017
@disgruntled_pelican I am glad you filed your report and you have the support of other women. What a disgusting mess. Sorry you experienced that! Congrats on the new job! Hope the telling of the boss goes smoothly and they are understanding!
AFM: last night my pelvis went out of place and I couldn’t walk. It was so painful, so I went to chiropractor today and scheduling pelvic floor PT. I was actually coming here to rave about my chiro and OB and how supportive they both have been about relieving pain not just suffering through because it is a part of pregnancy. I hate that there are creeps that take advantage of people that are seeking help! And I did my 3 hour glucose test today! It went so much better than the 1 hour. I didn’t feel sick at all. Fingers crossed it means better numbers.
@disgruntled_pelican, I am so sorry you had that experience. congrats on the job though! That’s very exciting!
@ramzlau, I hope it helped your pain! Anecdote but with my son, the drink was awful and I failed and at my 16 week check this time, I didn’t mind the drink at all and passed. So 🤞🏽🤞🏽🤞🏽 For you!!
Sooooo our most recent bid was accepted!! We bought a house! So now in the next 3.5 months, I have to decorate an entire house, purchase every single thing for a house (we own nearly nothing since we rent furnished places), pack as much as I can, HAVE A BABY!!!!, and move (we will likely move 3-4 weeks after the baby comes so long as everything goes smoothly and I feel ok). Oh my goodness.
The house is beautiful. So much space. A playground across the house for the kids and a school nearby. A huge backyard. It’s going to be the biggest space I’ve ever lived in. And now I finally get to plan a nursery and plan my son’s bedroom out!
Hopefully the EU lifts travel restrictions from Canada and one of our moms can fly down in mid-July to help us out with this stuff. 🤞🏽🤞🏽 We have no one else here 😅😬.
I finally told my job I was pregnant yesterday. I seriously don’t know why I was so scared to. New job, working from home, my work days are so busy and my bosses calendar is always full so I didn’t know how to approach it. They were so professional and excited for me. At my old job, my boss there pulled me into his office and told me to hide my pregnancy because it was offending another person in the office....so I have had some negative experiences prior which just had me worried I guess. There is a reason I don’t work at that job anymore. Especially after HR did nothing about it. Anyways, I am so relieved to finally get that off of my shoulders and to have let my job know
Re: Weekly Randoms - Week of 3/7
or planning doing hypnobabies? I started early because last time I felt like I could have used the extra practice. I only used it with DS2, not DS1. I really liked it.
*Live, Love, Laugh, Learn*
@mindyb2019 With DD I had that happen often (like several times a week). For me, I think it was related to the terrible acid reflux I was having. It’s super scary when that happens.
@disgruntled_pelican yay congratulations!
Married: 8/10/13
BFP- 12/18/15, D&E- 4/8/16 @ 21w5d- confirmed Thanatophoric Dysplasia
BFP- 11/7/17, M/C- 11/18/17 @ 4w6d
BFP- 8/25/18 ~ EDD- 5/9/19 ~ DD born 5/2/20 *Lillian Hazel*
BFP- 10/9/20 ~ EDD- 6/21/21
@mindyb2019 that's so scary!
@disgruntled_pelican congratulations!
DD1
DD2
DD3
@mindyb2019 that sounds terrifying! It definitely could have been because you were on your back. Like others have said, maybe try to wedge something on either side so you don’t accidentally roll to your back.
DD1
DD2
DD3
DD1
DD2
DD3
@Omie_Wise Not sure yet. I should do something?
DD1
DD2
DD3
DD1
DD2
DD3
Me: 32 years old
DS1 Due 6.7.2021
she got back to me and could not hit my minimum. I had to turn it down and I’m kind of crushed. She worked hard to get it increased (all through university so there are certain equity issues) but she couldn’t. It was so hard to turn down because I could tell she really wanted me to work there. But, I will be happy with the other position, I am ready to move on! Next tricky bit is telling my current boss, but then it’s over
On another random note- about a month ago I saw a chiropractor that sexually harassed me- all verbal. It was a really rough time and I hemmed and hawed over reporting and eventually jus swept it under the rug. Today, a local woman posted a similar experience on Facebook and it’s been making rounds. I contacted her and we are pursuing a joint complaint with 13 other women.
DD1
DD2
DD3
Married: 8/10/13
BFP- 12/18/15, D&E- 4/8/16 @ 21w5d- confirmed Thanatophoric Dysplasia
BFP- 11/7/17, M/C- 11/18/17 @ 4w6d
BFP- 8/25/18 ~ EDD- 5/9/19 ~ DD born 5/2/20 *Lillian Hazel*
BFP- 10/9/20 ~ EDD- 6/21/21
**TW Living Child**
BFP 2/2014 - DS - 10/2014
Me: 37, MH: 38; Married August 2017
TTC #1 October 2017: BFP on 12/1/2017, DD born 7/24/2018 @ 37+1 after induction due to preeclampsia
TTC #2 January 2020: AMA, dx with DOR in May 2020
IVF July 2020: 16 eggs retrieved, 14 mature, 12 fertilized, 3 blasts, 2 PGT-A normal
FET 10/7/20: BFP on 10/12/20!!! (EDD 6/25/21); First beta 10/16/20 (9dpt): 148; Second beta 10/19/20 (12dpt): 621; Third beta 10/26/20 (19dpt): 4732; Fourth (and final!) beta 11/2/20 (26 dpt): 22,000+
DD1
DD2
DD3
*Live, Love, Laugh, Learn*
*Live, Love, Laugh, Learn*
I finally told my job I was pregnant yesterday. I seriously don’t know why I was so scared to. New job, working from home, my work days are so busy and my bosses calendar is always full so I didn’t know how to approach it. They were so professional and excited for me. At my old job, my boss there pulled me into his office and told me to hide my pregnancy because it was offending another person in the office....so I have had some negative experiences prior which just had me worried I guess. There is a reason I don’t work at that job anymore. Especially after HR did nothing about it. Anyways, I am so relieved to finally get that off of my shoulders and to have let my job know