PGAL Check-in 01/26

laurad75 · January 2021

This thread is for those who are pregnant after a previous loss(es).

Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom?

Previous loss(es)?

How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically?

Any appointment updates?

Rants/Raves/Questions?

Any milestones coming up?

GTKY: What is one non-pregnancy/ baby thought that has been on your mind today.

laurad75 · January 2021

I started this because my PGAL brain is kicking in right on schedule in between appointments.

Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom? 18+3/ 6.23/ 1 DS

Previous loss(es)? 3

How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically? Physically pretty good. Sleep is getting tricky but if I go to bed early it all evens out. Emotionally I'm mostly fine but the anxiety seems to trickle in halfway between my appointments which is exactly where I am. I'm finding myself a little uncharacteristically sad from time to time.

Any appointment updates? Next appt is AS, 2 weeks from today.

Rants/Raves/Questions? I bought baby girl a little footie outfit. We were at the local kids shop in town and I saw it and decided to buy it. It was so soft and pink. It will be here home from the hospital outfit I think. If all goes well at the AS in a couple of weeks I will let myself buy something else.

Any milestones coming up? An uneventful AS will be huge. While everything turned out okay DS's AS was somewhat traumatic. It was discovered at that appointment that he only has one functioning kidney. It turned out to be a very minor issue but at the time we didn't know if it was a symptom of a much bigger problem. The memory of that day is just adding to my regular anxiety.

GTKY: What is one non-pregnancy/ baby thought that has been on your mind today. DH has been on my about finding work. I'm not just lying around the house and I'm busy all the time but none of the projects I have are paid work so I get his frustration...I don't think he understands that parttime work is not particularly easy to come by right now.

akoros · January 2021

@laurad75 I hear you on the anxiety. Hopefully we both have clear, boring scans in a couple of weeks!

Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom? 18 weeks (June 29th), FTM but 3rd pregnancy

Previous loss(es)? 2; TFMR Dec 2019, MMC at 15 weeks Jul 2020

How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically? Mostly fine on both fronts. Starting to feel cautiously excited, which then scares me as I know the feeling of letting down my guard just to be slapped down by a loss

Any appointment updates? anatomy scan in 2 weeks (2/9)...if it goes well I'm hoping that means I can let myself breathe.

Rants/Raves/Questions? Found out over the weekend that my mother told their neighbor about the pregnancy. At the time I didn't mind, she mentioned it to them because they posted on Nextdoor about getting rid of some baby stuff that my mom wanted, and they know more gory details than most about my prior pregnancies (had dinner at their place literally when I was unknowingly miscarrying the last, when they offered to give me a bunch of free items now that their twins are getting bigger). That said, knowing that someone else knows is now giving me anxiety...

Any milestones coming up? Mainly the anatomy scan. After that point I'll probably tell work and start thinking about telling more people, which is a huge step. I know I shouldn't, but I keep zeroing in on stories of women who have a loss at 24/28/+ weeks.

GTKY: What is one non-pregnancy/ baby thought that has been on your mind today. Got my new work laptop and it's huge...whomp whomp. I asked for a smaller model (we had 3 options), but FedEx lost the initial shipment so somewhere along the line they either forgot or decided to send me the bigger one. It also doesn't have a touch screen, which the smaller one does (sounds weird, but I actually do like the touch screen a lot). I feel like a brat asking them to give me what I initially wanted....but it's not what I said I wanted and I had valid reasons for wanting something lighter (easier to carry) and smaller (my WFH desk is small, so I need to reconfigure things to use the bigger laptop, or stop having dual screens).

MelissaMay82 · January 2021

@laurad75 and @akoros I also hope we that we have perfect boring scans in the next couple of weeks.

Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom? 19+3 / 6/21 / 1 DD

Previous loss(es)? 2 losses, 21 weeks and 4 weeks

How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically? Physically- N/v has improved, acid reflux has started, continued hip pain and occasional headaches. Emotionally- I’m getting really anxious for my 20 week AS, even though I had an early one at 16 weeks that looked great. What is also making me anxious is the unknowns of the covid vaccine. I did get my first dose but I’m really on the fence about getting the second one.

Any appointment updates? Next Wednesday 20 week AS

Rants/Raves/Questions? NATM

Any milestones coming up? 20 week AS

GTKY: What is one non-pregnancy/ baby thought that has been on your mind today. I’m really trying to figure out what I want to do with my career when I return to work full time. I probably won’t go back to work full time for probably 5 years.

_orchid_ · February 2021

@laurad75 I'm sorry your anxiety is ramping up. Will dh be able to go into the AS with you? I can imagine you'd have stress heading into that appt- sending you ♥️ and wishes for a perfect scan! I'm finding myself uncharacteristically sad too but I attribute it more to the pandemic, especially as we creep up to the one year mark.
@akoros fx for a perfect scan for you too! I always find telling the first few groups of people is tough, but it gets easier once you get used to it. Honestly this is one of the reasons I'm thinking about a SM announcement- instead of having to tell a bunch of groups, I just want to be able to put it out there once and then be done with it. Worried about late losses too, but mostly bc of some of the things I've seen about getting covid later in pregnancy.
@MelissaMay82 hoping for a perfect scan for you on Wednesday!!! I got the first covid stick and am nervous about the second- not about the actual vaccine, but the second reaction. Los#2 happened at 7 weeks, but after I had a high fever due to strep at 5 weeks. Now I know I have other issues that caused the loss, but in my head fever=loss. Very nervous about the possibility of a fever, but going forward with it bc getting covid would be worse for me.

_orchid_ · February 2021

Weeks/EDD/How many times a mom? 18+6/ June 29 / 3rd hopefully

Previous loss(es)? 3

How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically? Physically like crap this week. Baby must've had a growth spurt bc I'm hurting. The meds I take for sjorgens make me feel sick and I'm over it- usually I feel great at this point and I'm still feeling terrible. Exhausted too. Emotionally ok- just trying not to think about it too much. Really nervous something is going to happen now that my older kids are so excited. Feb is national congenital heart defect month, and I have some fb friends who have dealt with heart issues who post daily about it during Feb. This year it's giving me anxiety bc of the potential heart issues with this baby.

Any appointment updates? Fetal echo + regular ob on 2/5

Rants/Raves/Questions? I think everything I wrote above is a rant 😳 rave is that family is making plans to be here this summer and I'm really looking forward to seeing them after not for the past year+ now. Also I got a 2.5 mile run/walk in yesterday which really helped with my aches and pains.

Any milestones coming up? Nope

GTKY: What is one non-pregnancy/ baby thought that has been on your mind today. I am halfway through the school year and summer is on its way!! I love summers off with my kids, and it makes the junk I go through during the school year worth it. I had a year-round job for about 10 years of my professional life so I've been on both sides. I miss the longer lunch breaks and occasional downtime I used to have at my old jobs, but having the time with my kids is awesome.

MelissaMay82 · February 2021

@_orchid_ I am very nervous about getting a fever with the second dose.

laurad75 · February 2021

@_orchid_ ugh, no. That’s the other thing. DH can’t come to AS which is even worse. I’m sure I could make arrangements for him to get an exception but then I would need to coordinate someone else to pick up DS from nursery school so it’s just not worth it. We are very close to the hospital so if something does go wrong he would be able to be with me very quickly.

akoros · February 2021

@laurad75 Mine can't come either, it sucks

Today's anxiety is that I haven't felt her much. I did feel a flutter about 4 weeks ago that I thought was her, but nothing since (or nothing I've noticed). I had a dream that I felt a bunch of kicks and literally could feel a foot through my stomach (unlikely, I know, but it's a dream), so when I woke up I remembered that I haven't really felt anything. Not really sure what to do about it, my appointment is in a week and if she's gone, she's gone. There's nothing I can do about it.

_orchid_ · February 2021

@akoros fwiw I haven't felt much movement yet either! I'm not even sure what I'm feeling every few days is movement or if it's gas bc of the medication I'm on. I've also been having a hard time finding the hb this week (MFM wants me to check 3x/day but I usually only do 2-3x/week). I'm trying not to think/worry about it- at 19 weeks there nothing I can do either way about it. I just keep thinking that this will only be a cause of anxiety for another 2-4 weeks bc by then we should be able to feel them!

akoros · February 2021

@_orchid_ Thank you, I admit I've been kind of spiraling and in a funk all day. I know this is my own doing (like I said, there's really nothing that changed between yesterday and today, I just snapped). You're right that there's no real point in worrying, whatever happens will happen

_orchid_ · February 2021

@akoros ♥️♥️♥️ I thought for sure I'd be able to feel him by now, but here we are. I think it's hard (not really hard, but can't think of the right word) bc we're at the end of June so it feels like we hit all these milestones a long time after most others. At this point I try to just remember "there's nothing to worry about until there's something to worry about".

MelissaMay82 · February 2021

@akoros & @_orchid_ hugs to both of you. It is so nerve racking to not feel movement. My brain always goes to worst case scenario when I can’t feel her for a while.

PGAL Check-in 01/26

Re: PGAL Check-in 01/26

Choose Another Board

Search Boards