Can infertility leads to depression?

changeroscoe · December 2020

I have a friend so close to me and I want to help her. She has been married for 5 years TTC for 4 years with no luck. Setting no doctor’s appointment for his partner is not open about it. His partner keeps telling her that if God will give them then it will be done. No need to rush. OMG! My friend always pretending to be okay even if not. When she sees a pregnant woman, she feels pity for herself and telling me why others are so blessed and they are not. I don’t know how to comfort her with no hurt feelings coz I know that she is too sensitive about this matter. I want to know if infertility can lead to depression? Is this what she’s feeling right now? How can I help her without offending her?

changeroscoe · December 2020

What do you think about it?

changeroscoe · December 2020

ladyp0tter · January 2021

It can absolutely lead to depression and anxiety. She can speak to infertility counselors. I had to talk to one when we decided to do donor eggs anyway (part of the process). It was a help just to hear someone else's professional take and the questions they asked to help me process. I have had so many losses in my child bearing life that I still have PTSD. I Am currently 6wks pregnant with my donor egg, IVF baby and am so nervous for my Ultrasound on Friday. To the point where I HAVE to think about something else or I go down a rabbit hole. I also have a spouse that although he is good with the IVF and Donor route, it took a while for him to get here. He felt like if God didn't want to give us a child after our first/second attempt, maybe it wasn't meant to be. I finally convinced him that maybe we are not lined up to God's timeline yet. Hopeful that this pregnancy makes it and God is with us for this one. Good luck to your friend.

mbradfo2 · January 2021

So, long answer here...

Infertility has been shown to cause anxiety and depression as well as PTSD-like symptoms. There have been multiple studies that have shown that the emotional weight of infertility -- especially for as long as your friend -- can be the equivalent of serious diseases, loss of loved ones, etc. Additionally, since infertility isn't talked about much, women (and men) can feel pressured to act like everything is OK when they are absolutely not OK.

It sounds like your friend and her partner are religious. I grew up in a very religious household - church every sunday, youth groups, bible study: the whole 9 yards. Infertility is one of the things that pushed me away from organized religion; I couldn't bear to sit through another sermon about how children are blessings from God because all I could think of was 'so why do I not deserve a blessing too? what did I do wrong? why am I being punished?'.

bumphi · January 2021

I am so sorry to hear about your friend's experiences. While infertility is not a disease, it and its treatment can affect all aspects of people's lives, which can cause various psychological-emotional disorders or consequences including frustration, depression, anxiety, hopelessness, guilt, and feelings of worthlessness in life. It is indeed a difficult road to travel. How is she now? I guess the couple should visit a gynecologist for her and urologists for him. Have you tried to bring this matter to your friend?

bumphi · January 2021

bumphi said:

I am so sorry to hear about your friend's experiences. While infertility is not a disease, it and its treatment can affect all aspects of people's lives, which can cause various psychological-emotional disorders or consequences including frustration, depression, anxiety, hopelessness, guilt, and feelings of worthlessness in life. It is indeed a difficult road to travel. How is she now? I guess the couple should visit a gynecologist for her and urologists for him. Have you tried to bring this matter to your friend?
Edit: I am praying for the couple to find peace at their hearts.

stacemom · January 2021

Haven't told her but my other caring friend gives me a bit of advice like yours as well. I'm gonna tell her this one, thank you so much. Thanks for your concern for my friend. God bless you more.

ivfmeerut · July 2022

It can be cured through many fertility treatments, including therapies, medications, IUI or IVF procedures, and more. While infertility is not a disease, it and its treatment can affect various aspects of people's lives, which can cause multiple psychological-emotional disorders or consequences including turmoil, frustration, depression, anxiety, hopelessness, guilt, and feelings of worthlessness. Therapy is also a very effective way to treat depression. When a person is in therapy, they may discuss their feelings about infertility, and goals, and identify strategies for improving their relationship. Few couples find that infertility harms their relationship, so attending counselling together may also help. Infertility can be cured depending on the cause. Multiple treatments can help a couple conceive and result in successful delivery.

mina-p · July 2022

Does anyone know if there's a chemical/biological connection between emotional disorders and infertility, or is it exclusively based on the hardships of the situation?

Can infertility leads to depression?

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