@grogu@avocadotoast30 I'm sorry the ultrasounds weren't more comforting. I know the techs cam be a little cold, especially where I am since they're not really allowed to tell you anything. FX you both get clear and beautiful scans with friendly techs on the 13th!
**TW**
I remember with my first loss I could tell something was wrong and I wouldn't leave until I pried it out of her. Then I cried and she said "see? This is why I don't tell people anything!"...um...thanks lady. Since my 2 MMCS I am a ptsd mess at all ultrasounds and I start crying while still in the waiting room so most techs take pity on me and will at least tell me if there is a heart beat or if things are looking OK. I usually start with my loss speech, tell them I've been here before and I can handle it, so can they please just tell me what they are seeing so I can prepare properly for what is to come. I may have already started practicing my speech for the 25th...
I had my first appointment and US this morning. I love my dr. He knows how nervous I am about my mmc date and happily ordered another US for a few days after my lost date and also told me to call if my anxiety spikes/I need to get on sooner and they will fit me in ASAP. It’s a relief that he understands anxiety around all of this.
ETA: also got a daily medicine to help with the nausea and hopefully not have to be in bed all afternoon everyday.
@mrspants0809 I'm glad your appointment went well. It sounds like your doctor is wonderful and caring. My PCP is wonderful but getting extras can be difficult where I live. We have a small hospital and even "urgent" ultrasounds can take days.
What kind of meds are you on? I have diclecton/diclegis from last time but I'm on the fence about taking it.
So I stupidly ordered more digis. They arrived this morning and I took one immediately and it only said 1-2...cue major freakout...so took another one immediately after and ot said 2-3 again. Im hoping it's just that the tests were cold...but now I'm having a huge meltdown. Just sent SO to the store to buy a million FRER because at least with those I can see the lines. I am hoping it's just that my hcg is too high OR the tests are crap. There are no lab bookings available for weeks so I can't even call my doctor for tests...hoping the FRERs ease my mind a bit...
@Panaceia I'm so sorry you are dealing with this! It's so stressful. Keep us updated on the outcome on the FRER. Can you see your Dr earlier for some reassurance?
@grogu The FRERs look good. I tried with just urine, about 50/50 urine and water, and 75 water to 25 urine and they all look pretty much exactly the same with the test line still WAY darker than the control. Even the one that was mostly water. So I'm hoping that's a good sign and I am not testing anymore. I can't handle the stress.
@Panaceia I really hope you aren't! I'm keeping everything crossed for you. ❤️❤️❤️ Can you request bloodwork (I know you said there weren't any appointments available) to see if your HCG is going up or down? Sending awkward internet hugs 🫂
@grogu first tri Us measurements are very inaccurate, don’t worry about three days at all. Sorry about the US tech. Some of them are like that bc the doc has to share everything and they don’t want to give news with their facial expression.
Married DW 08.2013; AI 2x; IUI 6x; IUI #7 05.2015; DD born 2.2016 ; Reciprocal IVF FET #1 on 11.18.2020
Thanks guys. I'm surprisingly ok. I think I sort of expect losses at this point. Not sure yet if we're going to try again or not. My doctor is just tracking my betas back to 0 at this point so I have a beta draw tomorrow. Anyways, I'm still lurking and wishing you all so much luck! I'm sure I'll pop in to comment from time to time:)
@Panaceia I'm glad you are doing okay. I've been thinking about you a lot. Similarly to you expecting losses, my friend said to me recently that she's used to losses and that just breaks my heart. No one should be used to or expect it. Sending so much love.
Thanks everyone ❤ @rgn12 Thank you:) It's crazy...I'm still in contact with a few people from our last BMB and between the few of us we've had 5 losses in the past 3 to 4 weeks. I think we're all due for some good luck soon!
@grogu I totally agree. I actually count myself lucky that I had my rainbow last year and have 2 beautiful, healthy girls. I found the losses much harder when we were TTC #2. I think seeing how hard it was to get #2 just sort of prepared me for an even harder journey to #3:)
@Panaceia That's how I felt about trying for # 3 also, and when I thought I had lost this one. Although I was sad, there was less pressure for my son not to be an only child and I knew he wanted a sibling so badly. I hope you're doing okay!
@ladyk127 I'm doing well:) Unfortunately my betas doubled between my 2 draws so I'm really hoping my next draw shows that they are finally starting to fall. This is just dragging on...and I'm not loving the possibility of ectopic right now...but emotionally I'm actually completely ok:)
@panaceia My first miscarriage was like that. I felt like it dragged itself out forever. In reality it was like 2-3 weeks after I found out there was no baby that I started bleeding but it felt like a year, and my hcg took forever to go down. Hope it's quicker for you! Glad you're doing okay. I feel like even when I was sad about my loss, being out of limbo I felt better. My therapist told me I have anticipation anxiety which is worse for me than the anxiety when something actually goes wrong.
Re: PGAL 12/27
**TW**
I remember with my first loss I could tell something was wrong and I wouldn't leave until I pried it out of her. Then I cried and she said "see? This is why I don't tell people anything!"...um...thanks lady. Since my 2 MMCS I am a ptsd mess at all ultrasounds and I start crying while still in the waiting room so most techs take pity on me and will at least tell me if there is a heart beat or if things are looking OK. I usually start with my loss speech, tell them I've been here before and I can handle it, so can they please just tell me what they are seeing so I can prepare properly for what is to come. I may have already started practicing my speech for the 25th...
What kind of meds are you on? I have diclecton/diclegis from last time but I'm on the fence about taking it.
Keep us updated on the outcome on the FRER. Can you see your Dr earlier for some reassurance?
Sending awkward internet hugs 🫂
Similarly to you expecting losses, my friend said to me recently that she's used to losses and that just breaks my heart. No one should be used to or expect it.
Sending so much love.
@rgn12 I hope you are doing ok ❤️
@rgn12 Thank you:) It's crazy...I'm still in contact with a few people from our last BMB and between the few of us we've had 5 losses in the past 3 to 4 weeks. I think we're all due for some good luck soon!
@grogu I totally agree. I actually count myself lucky that I had my rainbow last year and have 2 beautiful, healthy girls. I found the losses much harder when we were TTC #2. I think seeing how hard it was to get #2 just sort of prepared me for an even harder journey to #3:)