PGAL 12/27 — The Bump
August 2021 Moms

PGAL 12/27

This is a check in for those of us who are experiencing pregnancy after a loss (miscarriage, chemical pregnancy, stillbirth, child loss, to name a few). Hopefully we can all lend support to each other through the hormone filled craziness that is pregnancy!

Just a reminder: there is a general loss trigger warning on this entire thread. 

1. How far along are you? Any milestones?  

2. How are you feeling (pregnancy symptoms)?

3. How are you feeling (anxiety wise)?

4. When is your next appointment? 

5. Rants/raves/whatever (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)  

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Re: PGAL 12/27

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  • 1. How far along are you? Any milestones?  6+3 not yet, our MMC was detected at 10 weeks and development had stopped at 9 so I’m still steadily both freaking out and completely detached

    2. How are you feeling (pregnancy symptoms)?

    I didn’t have nausea last time either but it’s still worrying me that I don’t this time either. I have symptoms but I still wish I felt more pregnant I guess. Boobs are HUGE and sore, heartburn comes and goes, low back is sore, twingy mild cramps. I gagged eating dinner yesterday, the only thing that sounds good lately is chicken and I had to spit that out yesterday and immediately wanted fruit and popcorn instead so who knows lol my partner assured me I’m acting pretty damn pregnant but it’s still not enough to exhale

    I’m also having teeny tiny bits of blood tinged discharge which I keep reading is normal but yesterday had me ready to call it. It’s like EWCM mixed with old brown blood only when I wipe and not every time but I’m still upset over it

    3. How are you feeling (anxiety wise)? Eh I’ve been better, I was really zen at first but I find myself panicking at the thought of another ultrasound

    4. When is your next appointment? 

    My insurance got interrupted 2 months ago and just got reinstated so I don’t have one yet. Calling tomorrow, I have just a pregnancy confirmation appointment tomorrow but I’m hoping they can get me in soon for the ultrasound and blood work, I’ll mention the spotting and see what they have to say

    I had 5 huge fibroids removed 6 months ago, they were detected during the ultrasound that confirmed my loss and probably contributed to it. We got pregnant right away after I was cleared to so I’m trying to get back to my old RE for another checkup on that

    5. Rants/raves/whatever (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)  Nothing rn just trying to keep my head above water and distractions up, I want to be more positive but it feels nerve wracking to be vulnerable like that. I found myself eyeballing little baby hiking style boots yesterday because that’s how we planned on announcing last time (we’re both avid hikers) then I just got nervous. What a mind f***

    thereisalightPanaceiaemily1052ladyk127
  • @ladyk127 congrats on  your milestones. Glad to hear you're doing well!

    @cocoliso13 & @Panaceia I feel you on detached. If I didn't have symptoms I'd think there's no way I'm pregnant. Expecting my period any day now. Not quite sure how to change that and connect.
    Panaceialadyk127
  • @cocoliso13 I have 3 large fibroids (that I know of, who knows if more have grown since DS3) and it gives me constant anxiety. They said they wouldn’t do anything about them until 3 losses or if I was in pain. I’m just hoping this one has implanted in a good spot. I’m so sorry for your previous loss, but I’m glad you were able to have yours removed, hoping that resolved the problem!
    Panaceiacocoliso13
  • 1. How far along are you? Any milestones?
    5+4, I hit one of my loss milestones on Christmas.

    2. How are you feeling (pregnancy symptoms)?
    I’m feeling mostly okay. I still can’t stay up past 9:30, but DS3 has been waking up before 5 every morning so that can’t be helping. Also I am so bloated, I don’t remember it being this bad with my first 3. I hate that I’m wishing for more nausea, but I just really want some more solid symptoms... hopefully week 6 will bring that.

    3. How are you feeling (anxiety wise)?
    The lack of symptoms this week is making me nervous for sure. I did a test two days ago (I’m trying to do one every few days instead of daily) and it was nice and dark right away, so that was good to see.

    4. When is your next appointment?
    I was originally scheduled for an US on the 30th when I’d be 6 weeks exactly. I called and asked them to move it to next week, when I’ll be 6+5. I’m hoping we’ll have a better chance of seeing something more concrete at that stage.

    5. Rants/raves/whatever

    I’m realizing that scheduling appointments is going to be a big challenge in COVID times. No kids are allowed in the office and the only person with the ability to watch our kids and that we have in our little pod is my mom, who works full time. With my oldest two being on hybrid schedule they are home, more than half the time... so it will be interesting. I’m glad to have this problem and still be pregnant, but with the amount of visits they want me in for (high risk) it does create some logistical stress.
    Panaceiaemily1052
  • @Panaceia it is so hard to relax. I am really sorry you are feeling so anxious about it all. I had major symptoms with my MMC super early too but with my living child they didn't start until I was farther along. Can your H intercept the CB tests tomorrow?? 

    @ladyk127 I did that last time with the diclegis last time and lived to regret it haha  
    I'm trying to use the same mindset as your dad. I have zero control of what it happening in my uterus right now.

    @cocoliso13 I hope you get in soon! Any sort of bleeding no matter how little is terrifying after a loss. ❤️

    @doodlemom131 I don't know if seeing a HB will help me connect. I had a healthy HB at 8w3d last time and it stopped growing 11 days later.  Maybe when I can feel it move?


      
     

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
    Married: 2011
    DD: 2016
    MMC : Nov 2020


    Panaceiacocoliso13ladyk127
  • How far along are you? Any milestones? 
    5w2d

    How are you feeling (pregnancy symptoms)?
    Finally have sore boobs! Yes! 🤣 
    Insomnia and crazy dreams have also started. 

     How are you feeling (anxiety wise)?

    I'm relatively calm until I'm not. Something will pop in my head and then I run to google. 


    4. When is your next appointment? 

    Tuesday! I have an ultrasound, I know there won't be much to see. I have another ultrasound Jan 13th too so hopefully there is a HB then. 

    5. Rants/raves/whatever (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)  

    I like everyone else am feeling pretty disconnected with this pregnancy. Likely to protect myself in the event of another loss. If we lose this one I think we will be officially one and done which makes me sad to even think about. 
    I am trying to stay zen and healthy for this bean because it's all I can control with this process. 
      
     

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
    Married: 2011
    DD: 2016
    MMC : Nov 2020


    Panaceiathereisalightcocoliso13emily1052
  • @baby_yoda1986 I'm also googling everything that pops into my head. It looks like the tests are being delivered today now so I'm going to leave them outside and gave SO take them away when he gets home. FX for another great ultrasound on Tuesday!!!
    groguemily1052
  • Thank you! Fibroids are so weird but common! I still have a few small ones after the myomectomy because of positioning. Fingers crossed for uneventful fibroid pregnancies for both of us :)
    thereisalight
  • 1. How far along are you? Any milestones?  5+2. I won't hit my first milestone until 8 weeks

    2. How are you feeling (pregnancy symptoms)? Sore boobs, complete exhaustion, constipation, starting to have cravings and aversions, but no morning sickness yet. Guessing that will start within the next week.

    3. How are you feeling (anxiety wise)? It comes and goes in waves. Sometimes I'm okay and others I am just hoping for a healthy baby in my arms in 8 months.

    4. When is your next appointment? Jan 14. Calling the nurseline tomorrow in hopes to get an ultrasound.

    5. Rants/raves/whatever (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) I honestly won't be confident with this pregnancy until I can feel the baby move. I just am taking things as easy as I can with an almost 2 year old and hoping for the best.


    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie - YeTq
    groguemily1052Panaceiathereisalight
  • @cocoliso13 I spotted brown my entire first trimester with my daughter. This one I have been bleeding and spotting on and off since 5 weeks and the baby was okay at my ultrasound at 7 weeks. I still can’t relax because of it, but il
    here to tell you it is definitely not always a sign of something bad. Honestly I know more people that spotted during their healthy pregnancy than didnt. 

     

    Panaceiacocoliso13
  • Gah. So I took another digi this afternoon because they showed up...and of course subsequently fell down the Google hole again. This is going to be the longest month of my life:/
  • @Panaceia Did it say 2-3 weeks?

     

    Panaceia
  • @Panaceia step away from the test! HCG levels vary so much in early pregnancy. 
    I'm sorry you are struggling with this though. It's such a mind f*ck of a time. ❤️
      
     

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
    Married: 2011
    DD: 2016
    MMC : Nov 2020


    doodlemom131thereisalightPanaceiashoogapoff
  • @ladyk127 Yep. Still 2-3 weeks. I read a lot of people don't get 3+ until 6 weeks...I'm only 5+3 based on LMP...plus I know hcg is lower in AMA mothers and the tests are mostly only reliable for telling if you're pregnant or not...but still. I may have ordered some FRER to hopefully put my mind at ease...

    @baby_yoda1986 I decided to use the last 3 for science (and because I would have a full on melt down if I got to Friday with it still saying 2-3). So I did one with FMU, one with SMU and one with diluted SMU. They all said 2-3 but the SMU line was quite a bit darker than the FMU. So I'm gonna call that a win. Plus I feel so much better knowing there are no more digis in the house!
    groguemily1052
  • @Panaceia we should come up with a HPT that actually gives you accurate levels.... we will be millionaires!!!!  
    Sorry you are stressing.  Anyway to ask for a blood draw or a beta to ease your mind?  (Sorry if you’ve touched on this before and I missed it)
    Panaceia
  • @baby_yoda1986 I'm in the same boat. Started noticing light pink spotting when I went to the bathroom the past couple of days, and it's changed to more of a light brown this morning. I have my first appointment/ultrasound tomorrow as well and trying not to freak out until then. Obviously easier said than done as this is the same time I had my MC last time...
    Panaceiapickle-chipsdoodlemom131thereisalight
  • @baby_yoda1986 and @avocadotoast30 I'm so sorry you are both dealing with this stress. Spotting can be totally normal during pregnancy and hopefully it ends up being nothing! I know that me saying that will do nothing to help your anxiety though. Can you guys maybe make a call and try to get in for a scan today? @baby_yoda1986 what time is your scan tomorrow? Do you have a L&D in a hospital near you that you could just go to today? I found my local hospital to be more than willing to check things out any time I was worried during my pregnancies. 
    groguavocadotoast30
  • @baby_yoda1986 @avocadotoast30 I spotted all the way through my entire first trimester with my daughter.  No reason was ever found.  She was obviously totally fine.  I started bleeding and then spotting on and off since 5w with this one, and I had an ultrasound at 7w and the baby was fine.  Growing normally and with a heartbeat.  I'm 8w2d now and still bleeding and spotting on and off.  It sucks and gives me anxiety sometimes but I know it's probably fine.  I did not have one spot of blood  with my son (my first pregnancy) so it's been both ways for me.  I know how anxiety inducing it is but it definitely doesn't mean imminent doom.


     

    Panaceiadoodlemom131thereisalightclaireloSC
  • @avocadotoast30 good luck today! 

    @Panaceia they won't see me until later in my pregnancy unfortunately. I tried going in at 13w with my MMC but they sent me to ER 🙄 
    My scan is at 1:30pm (PST) but I've already told my boss I'll likely be useless today and to cover the radios for me. 

    @ladyk127 I think I had spotting for a day or two with my DD. Just seeing the tinge of bloody cm sent me through the roof and back to my MMC last time. 

    It seems to have stopped now. I'm keeping everything crossed for this afternoon 🤞🤞🤞
      
     

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
    Married: 2011
    DD: 2016
    MMC : Nov 2020


    pickle-chipsPanaceialadyk127emily1052
  • @baby_yoda1986 and @avocadotoast30 I’m so sorry you both have spotting and the added stress of it. I can’t add anything to what’s already been said, just sending some good vibes your way.

    Baby Yoda I’ve got fingers and toes crossed your your scan this afternoon!! ❤️

    groguavocadotoast30
  • @baby_yoda1986 keep us posted on your scan! Sending all the good vibes your way!! ❤️🤞
    grogu
  • @baby_yoda1986 and @avocadotoast30 so sorry for the spotting, hoping it’s nothing more than that. Thinking of you both and hoping for the best news! <3
    grogu
  • @baby_yoda1986 I've got everything crossed for your scan tomorrow! I hope today goes quickly for you ❤
    grogu
  • FX for you @baby_yoda1986
    Baby Birthday Ticker TickerMarried DW <3 08.2013; AI 2x; IUI 6x; IUI #7 05.2015; DD born 2.2016 o:); Reciprocal IVF FET #1 on 11.18.2020 
  • @baby_yoda1986 Hoping it was good news!

     

  • @baby_yoda1986 I hope everything went okay!  Sending you all the good thoughts!  
  • @baby_yoda1986 looks like we'll be ultrasound buddies 😂. I'm glad your visit went ok, and keeping my fingers crossed for both of us on our next one!!
    grogu
  • @avocadotoast30 did they show you your ultrasound? My tech was super cold and just said the sac measured 5w1d and was done.  

    My doctor should call me today with more detailed information. 


      
     

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
    Married: 2011
    DD: 2016
    MMC : Nov 2020


  • @baby_yoda1986 mine was pretty cold too, she didn't say anything about how much the sac was measuring, just that it looked good and it's too early to see anything.

    I'll see if I can get more info from my doctor too!
    grogu
  • @avocadotoast30 good luck!! I was almost in shock when she walked out and I forgot to ask for a print out. She legit said "the sac is measuring 5w1d, here's a towel to clean up, you can go" and left. 
    I'm kinda bummed since I didn't get a picture of my last one at 8w3d because the tech said "there isn't much to see, your next one will be better" 🙄 

    I'll definitely get a print out next time! 
      
     

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
    Married: 2011
    DD: 2016
    MMC : Nov 2020


    avocadotoast30
  • @baby_yoda1986 and @avocadotoast30 I’m sorry both of your appointments were not more reassuring and that the u/s techs were so cold. I hope the next two weeks zoom by and the next scans are a much better experience for you both! 
    grogu
  • Okay so, my Doctor just called. I have a very tiny SCH right beside the gestational sac. Funny enough the cyst that was on my right ovary is gone but my left has one now? I think they must be directionally challenged because I still have pain on my right side. 
      
     

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
    Married: 2011
    DD: 2016
    MMC : Nov 2020


    emily1052thereisalightPanaceia
  • @grogu I have an SCH too. I had one in my last pregnancy too and it just disappeared... hoping that just happens again! My dr said to take it easy and not work out. 
    groguemily1052Panaceia
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