ummm @ivyvines6 you're superwoman. If I have both kids with me I can AT MAX do like 1.5-2 hrs before I need to get them back in their car seats and give myself a break. They also would be terrible with no proper nap! I'm so impressed you were able to do it!
I went camping this weekend with my family. We rented a camper, which was really fun. I tried a lot to picture how it would be with 1 more. It was the first "vacation" that was fairly tantrum free and the kids were easy to occupy. I think the same would happen with another baby, but not until that baby is walking. The crawling/stumbling stage is really hard when you're outside so much!
@doodleoodle pick away! I’ve been going to Disney for years. My parents met working there and my grandparents retired from there so yeah... I’ve been a lot. I’m not sure if the ergo compares to a tula. I’ve used a lillebaby, and tulas and I definitely prefer tulas. I actually have a free to grow (which is getting washed and put up until maybe baby happens ) a standard, and a toddler now. All in the same print.
(Sorry if that image is huge... I use the app)
@mamaqdubu it’s like the only outing that isn’t a super huge pita for me. I cried the first time I took them both out because it was SO hard! Also, what’s a nap? My kids don’t do that
I’ll PM you when we start planning our next trip @ivyvines6 because I couldn’t handle being out anywhere for that long with kids that age by myself. And at one point when we were there, DH said he had to go to the restroom and to go ahead and get in line for a ride. I was so frazzled by the time he got back that it was unbelievable. Do you meditate a lot? Are you a witch? P.S. that print is super cute! I’ll have to google the difference between the Tula and Ergo.
did you find out the genders of your children? Not with my first, yes with my second. (Both boys)
if/when you get pregnant again, will you find out? Not sure! I think I would hope for a girl, but not enough to need to know. It was a fun experience to find out in that moment and have DH tell me!
did you find out the genders of your children?
Yes, both
if/when you get pregnant again, will you find out? absolutely! We’re so impatient! With DD2 we did the NIPT at 12 weeks and even that seemed like a life time. I can’t imagine having to wait the whole 9 months. I’m a planner (okay... maaaaybe a control freak) and like to prepare.
I'm not a mom but I have FOMO and I'm bored at work and wanted to play soooo.....
did you find out the genders of your children?
N/A
if/when you get pregnant again, will you find out? I've alwayyyys said I want to find out because like @KFrob, I'm a planner and I love surprises but I HATE knowing that a surprise is coming because the suspense kills me. Also, I would love to be able to refer to my bump as the name we decide instead of just saying "it" or "the bump", etc. and actually getting to know my baby ahead of time. But lots of people that have waited say they loved it and I do love the idea of DH telling me like @mamaqdubu said. I suppose I still have lots of time to think about this. First it was taking forever to decide when to start trying, now I can agonize about to find out or not. Yaaaaay.
It's been quiet for a little while, but I'll share
How many children do you have currently? 2 little boys
How many more children do you think you might want? Just one, yeah I think just one. It's weird thinking about being done, because I'm also trying to decide if we're done now. But going through it twice I know how hard babies are and I don't know if I could do a 4th in my mid-late 30s at that point
What is holding you back from taking the plunge? DH is an only child, so it was a long drawn out conversation just to get to 2. When I was looking at the pile of baby gear after our youngest switched to a convertible car seat I asked him if we should start getting rid of this stuff or store it, he reminded me that he would have been fine with just 1 and he's never seen himself with more than 2. That being said, each time we get asked by other people if we're done, his answer changes. First it was "definitely done", then it was "I'm good with getting rid of the baby gear, but if you want to store it for a little while, that's ok too", to "I like to sleep", to "we've got our hands full right now". I can't tell if he's just tired of saying the same thing/finds it rude to blanket say no to acquaintances, or he's rethinking our future
Anything else you’d like to share? I honestly am still in a place where I don't even know if I want a third. Babies are hard, no joke. Those early days of night feedings, during dinner feedings, basically constantly nursing the kid. And then the early leaps and crying for what feels like hours... but I also know it doesn't last forever. Ugh, I really don't even know if I want to push it with DH or not
And then for the bonus questions:
did you find out the genders of your children? Yes with both. I was of the opinion that if the information was available, why not have it to make use of. Basically, I was impatient
if/when you get pregnant again, will you find out? Probably not for this last time around, if that happens. Since this would be the last baby, and I already have two boys, I don't want to spend the second half of a pregnancy being disappointed that I'll never have a little girl. I know you can make the exact argument in the other direction, and also I should be grateful no matter which sex the baby is, but preference happens. Plus one last big surprise making that last birth one to remember sounds fun
Edit for spelling
Me: 32 DH: 31 *The old lady by 5 whole weeks* Married: 11/2013 M: 6/2016 E: 5/2018
Guys, I'm officially on the "I don't want another one" train, as of right now that is. DD2 is 9 months. She's exhausting. She never stops moving, puts literally everything in her mouth, will not tolerate sitting still for a diaper change or getting dressed and is into everything. She is the complete opposite of DD1 at this age lol. I'm sure once she settles down a bit I'll be back to undecided...
did you find out the genders of your children? Yes and I cried both times.
if/when you get pregnant again, will you find out? I’m pretty sure I can’t wait a whole pregnancy to find out, but I know I’ll be disappointed again if it’s a third boy. Not that I don’t love my boys or anything but... lol I’ve always pictured myself as a girl mom /shrug
Hello! I have 2 DD's my oldest is 4 and my youngest is 2.5.
I've always wanted to have 3 kids, but now that the time has come to pull the trigger it has been really hard for me to pull.
I think the biggest thing thats holding me back is that Ive always wanted a boy, ever since the beginning and Ive ended up with two wonderful girls, lol. Im convinced that the third will likely be a girl. Mostly because I think my husband is broke and only capable of making girls, hehe 😉.
But, having said that, I think we'll take the plunge anyway and what will be will be. Ultimately, as long as theoretical baby is healthy, it really is irrelevant the gender. But would be blown away if I could get that damn boy! 😛
Hi @D&H0907 and welcome to BOTB! This board is relatively slow, so feel free to join us in Waiting Room Wednesday to talk about your feelings with regard to having your 3rd baby. The link to the forum is: <a href="https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12747537/wrw-october-2019#latest" title="Link: https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12747537/wrw-october-2019#latest">https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12747537/wrw-october-2019#latest</a><br>
Hi everyone! I currently have 2 DS. When I was still in the hospital with my last son I told DH I wanted 8 more. The nurses said I was crazy lol. Then I decided I didn’t want anymore kids. I got rid of a lot of my stuff. Out of nowhere my mind changed. My husband wasn’t in agreement at first, so we talked about it for a few months. He came around eventually. He seems more excited about it then I do at times. We originally agreed on 3 kids and we’ve decided to keep with that now and have one more. I always thought that I would have three kids. Two boys and a girl. I have my two boys but who knows for my third. We are waiting until our youngest is out of daycare for financial reasons. We hope to start May 2020 if he goes to kindergarten early but if not we will start TTC 9 months before he starts.
I keep on hearing that the third pregnancy is the hardest. Does that ring true for any of you ladies? My second was worse than my first so I’m a little nervous about how the third pregnancy will go.
@ktbkitten dirty lurker here... which probably means I’m thinking about having another 😂 I just gave birth to my 3rd baby in February. My first pregnancy was easy, my second was a little tougher due to more intense morning sickness and one lone varicose vein that appeared, and my last pregnancy was brutal. I developed tons of varicose veins (they’ve all disappeared now) and by my third trimester I was having false labor almost daily. I spoke to my OB about it at the time and she said that pregnancy is rough on your body and you never really fully recover so each pregnancy is harder. I have friends who have had multiple children and some of them say that their pregnancies got easier. Everything is anecdotal and no one knows or can predict anything ever 🤷♀️
I'm not sure I belong here, but I need to share, so here we go... How many children do you have currently? 3 sons How many more children do you think you might want? Who knows, we keep saying 4-6, but we're at three and I don't see us stopping soon. What is holding you back from taking the plunge? I'm still waiting for my first post-partum period (My youngest is 11 months, and I came off BC 2 weeks ago, I was expecting it to show up immediately because that's what it did the last two times, but it's nowhere to be seen.) Anything else you’d like to share? I took a pregnancy test this morning, and it was negative. I hate this uncertainty, I know I shouldn't complain because we've had three very easy TTC journey's so far, but the not knowing what's next is very hard for me.
@mrosek91 I feel like you are my alter ego. I have 3 daughters, have had easy ttc journeys as well but unlike the confidence you exude I have agonized over whether or not we should add another baby every single time!
That wait for your period to come back is tough. Hang in there!
@doodleoodle It's been an easy decision for us so far, we went into this marriage saying we wanted at least 4, and in our circles big families are the norm. I think the average at my synagogue is 5 kids per family. After this one it will probably get harder, since we'll have hit that 4 minimum, I'll probably be able to relate to you a little better then. I hope you are able to find peace with whatever you decide. (And I don't want to be presumptuous since you're an internet stranger, but the fact you're hanging out here makes me think you're probably leaning a specific way.)
@mrosek91 that’s so nice that large families are the norm. People thought we were nuts when we announced our third. Absolutely leaning towards having a fourth. It’s mostly silly things, like never being able to fit our family in a sedan again, and my own insecurities as a mom that are getting to me.
This exactly the place I need just to get this out there. Even if no one ever reads this.
How many children do you have currently? we have one DD who just turned 7
How many more children do you think you might want?
I want one more and DH wants to be done
What is holding you back from taking the plunge? We are ttc at the moment, but I go back and forth so much. Since I’m the driving force behind this next baby it feels like a lot of pressure. There are moments I want it so desperately and then others where I don’t want to mess with this beautiful thing we’ve got. I mean DD is in school, sleeps through the night, super independent, potty trained (obviously). We are getting our life back, do I really want to start all over again? Then there are more moments of thinking of never having another baby, getting rid of all the baby stuff, never experiencing those sweet moments again that make my heart hurt.
DH doesn’t want to talk about it and I feel so alone trying to make this life changing choice. My friends are all finished having kids so I would be the odd man out starting all this again. Just an internal tug of war
Anything else you’d like to share? I think I covered it all haha
Me: 32 DH: 37 Married: May 24, 2008 TTC #2 since: June 2020
Welcome @MrsBlindLove ! I’m sorry that you feel like you don’t have any support in making this decision. 7 years is a large gap so I understand why you feel you’d be starting over. For what it’s worth, I have 5 half siblings. 3 are from my mom’s first marriage and 2 are from my dad’s first marriage. So my mom birthed 4 babies total. She has 6 years between each baby and thinks that is the way to do it, and obviously did it again and again... and again lol. As an adult, the sibling I’m emotionally closest to is actually 14 years older than I am. However, in my own experience as the baby of the family I remember wanting to play with my siblings so badly and at a certain point them not being interested anymore. It was lonely in that regard and sometimes I felt like an only child because of it. But your children will be adults far longer than they will be children.
My my main concern for you is actually that your husband isn’t even willing to discuss it. Do you think he’d be helpful if/when the new baby is born or do you feel that he would shrug his shoulders at you and say he was one and done?
How many children do you have currently? I have 2 kids - a 6 year old and a 3 year old
How many more children do you think you might want? One more
What is holding you back from taking the plunge? Three things... 1.) My IUD (would need to go in to get it removed) 2.)My anxiety 3.)I am not one of those people that enjoy being pregnant, but I love the little human you get in the end.
Anything else you’d like to share? I was not very active for my first two pregnancies and struggled with my weight and mental health during and postpartum. It almost ruined my marriage after I had my son. I'm on therapy and have started living a healthier lifestyle since then. So I have a lot of anxiety about starting that all over again now that we are in such a good place again. If we decide to try for a third, I am determined to try to be much healthier and my husband says he will support me. But my anxiety is really keeping me from taking the plunge.
How many children do you have currently? I have 2 kids - a 6 year old and a 3 year old
How many more children do you think you might want? One more
What is holding you back from taking the plunge? Three things... 1.) My IUD (would need to go in to get it removed) 2.)My anxiety 3.)I am not one of those people that enjoy being pregnant, but I love the little human you get in the end.
Anything else you’d like to share? I was not very active for my first two pregnancies and struggled with my weight and mental health during and postpartum. It almost ruined my marriage after I had my son. I'm on therapy and have started living a healthier lifestyle since then. So I have a lot of anxiety about starting that all over again now that we are in such a good place again. If we decide to try for a third, I am determined to try to be much healthier and my husband says he will support me. But my anxiety is really keeping me from taking the plunge.
*Hugs* I so understand PPA and PPD struggles. I also experienced it after my first two. Hopefully your healthier lifestyle and an understanding of what to look out for will help you if you decide to go for it.
How many children do
you have currently? 1 boy, 12 months
How many more
children do you think you might want? At least 1 more. But MH and I are open
to 2 more if the second ends up being a boy too.
What is holding you
back from taking the plunge? I really wanted them to be 2 years apart, at
least, in school. So I’ve been waiting for Dec lol. I also don’t want to have a
summer baby since we are soooo active with camping and hiking and fishing… etc,
in the summer. Winters in MN suck, and are the perfect time to have a newborn
at home to cuddle with lol.
But with all that aside, I really just hope this journey is
a smoother one than last time. It took us 22 months to conceive our first and I
really don’t want to go through that again. It’s giving me some anxiety just
thinking about it.
Anything else you’d
like to share? I can’t wait to get this party started! I loved being
pregnant and missed it for months after giving birth to my son lol. I know, I’m
weird.
*TW* TTC history
Me:32 DH:31 Married: 8/2015
TTC #1: 4/2017 Testing: HSG, U/S, BW, and DH's SA all normal DX: Unexplained 8/2018: Clomid + TI = BFN 9/2018: Clomid + TI + Progesterone = BFN 11/2018: Clomid + IUI + Progesterone = BFN 12/2018: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone \\ Cancelled due to cyst 1/2019: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFP! \\ EDD Sept 30th, 2019 10/7/2019: Healthy baby boy!
I currently have 1 daughter who is not yet 16 months old.
How many more children do you think you might want? I think I would like just one more child.
What is holding you back from taking the plunge?
Timing. It just isn't the right time. On top of the pandemic and worrying about financial issues because we don't know what is going to happen in the next couple years? I want a large age gap between my children (based on my experience with my own siblings and so many other reasons). I am hoping for a 6 to 8 year age gap between them.
Anything else you’d like to share?
I have known fertility issues. Endometriosis & PCOS. And I had to use clomid to get pregnant the first time. I want to wait until I'm at least 33 for my second baby but I'm worried it will work against me fertility wise.
Six. Five boys (16, 15, 7, 5, & 2) and one girl (14).
How many more children do you think you might want? If it were only up to me, and DH was on board, I would keep going until I couldn’t have more. But realistically hoping for just one more. Would be super excited (yet worried!) for twins.
What is holding you back from taking the plunge? DH isn’t quite ready; I need to finish getting vaccinated for varicella because my labs were “equivalent” (and vaccine coverage is historically low right now due to people skipping well child visits); I still have Mirena; still getting back into shape after having our two year-old Anything else you’d like to share? I’m on the tail end of recovering from parathyroid surgery. I have MEN1. And my H and I had our first three kids when we were really young. H had a vasectomy. Then we had it reversed and had three more kids.
We are also both swimmers. We met on the pool deck at Michigan State University.
Six. Five boys (16, 15, 7, 5, & 2) and one girl (14).
How many more children do you think you might want? If it were only up to me, and DH was on board, I would keep going until I couldn’t have more. But realistically hoping for just one more. Would be super excited (yet worried!) for twins.
What is holding you back from taking the plunge? DH isn’t quite ready; I need to finish getting vaccinated for varicella because my labs were “equivalent” (and vaccine coverage is historically low right now due to people skipping well child visits); I still have Mirena; still getting back into shape after having our two year-old Anything else you’d like to share? I’m on the tail end of recovering from parathyroid surgery. I have MEN1. And my H and I had our first three kids when we were really young. H had a vasectomy. Then we had it reversed and had three more kids.
We are also both swimmers. We met on the pool deck at Michigan State University.
I can consider you as a super mom! Wish to be like you but got no courage. Life is pushing me hard! one baby is enough.
How many children do you have currently? I have a three year old daughter and eight month old son.
How many more children do you think you might want? I really thought I was done after number two. I never want to wear another article of nursing or maternity clothing again. I want to work on my body and be really healthy for the two I do have. I want more time to be able to work on projects (I’m a graphic designer and illustrator). Plus I have this heart arrhythmia that acts up when pregnant/postpartum. But now... I’m questioning not having a third. Just one more?
What is holding you back from taking the plunge? All the above. But here’s the thing...
Anything else you’d like to share? This notion of having another baby keeps creeping up in my subconscious. I think as a woman of child-bearing age, this might be natural. Like, I keep finding myself feeling happy at the idea of an “accident”. But this morning when I was half asleep I dreamed of a little girl - my third baby. And she was wonderful and I found myself really really wanting her. I couldn’t stop thinking of her all day. Aching for her. When I consider having a baby from my perspective, it’s NUTS. It’s hard enough being a mama of two. I’m always stressed and exhausted and worrying I’m not being a good mom to one or the other or both. But when I think of it from a little soul’s perspective...who could this person be? Become? What if she is just waiting to come live with us and be loved? Is that totally crazy?
Currently, I have one child. My husband and I would like two and preferably one of the opposite sex of the first. What's holding me back from having my second? My doctor told me I had to wait a year after having my baby before I can start trying for a second one. Anything else you'd like to share? Yes. I'm 41 and am scared to wait a full year before trying again, especially since I had three miscarriages preceeding my last pregnancy. My baby was born December 29th 2020. I want to bypass what the doctor says and start trying again. There is always room for second opinions. Any thoughts?
Hi ladies! This is my first post because I definitely have babies on the brain! 😊 a third baby, that is. ❤️
I currently have two sons, and I have always dreamed of four children. I am turning 35 this year and so I am starting to feel ready and think about another baby.
the things holding me back are the fact that we are waiting to move into a new home, I would like my youngest to begin JK so I can be at home alone with new baby during the day, worrying about being able to comfortably afford a bigger family- but the biggest reasons and worries of all are the fact that I will probably need to have a third cesarean and the fact that I suffered from PPA for about a year after my second child was born. I have learned so much about PPA since then and about mental health so I think I will be able to be okay but it does worry me.
How many more children do you think you might want? 1
What is holding you back from taking the plunge? DH and I are going on vacation at the end of this month--to Hawaii!! Once we come back I am going to meet with my new provider to talk things through--I have an unusual medical history and am hoping for the possibility of a VBAC. I'm a lot less emotional about this than I thought I would be...but maybe living through a pandemic has shifted my perspective on things I can and cannot control.
Anything else you’d like to share? I was part of the July 2019 BMB and it was/is such an amazing group of women. We migrated to Facebook right before our babies were born and our group is still very active and supportive. I hope my second BMB, whenever that may be, can replicate some of that July '19 magic!
@happymom8 Welcome! Moving into a new home is exciting--are you staying in your current area? DH and I also waited until our daughter was old enough to be in preschool whenever a second baby was born so I could be home alone with a newborn. There are some providers that allow VBA2Cs--if you have a local chapter of ICAN, they may help you find one. I'm glad to hear you've come a long way in your mental health! It's amazing how much growth can happen in a short time.
Re: Come in if you’re considering having a second, third, or fourth baby...
I went camping this weekend with my family. We rented a camper, which was really fun. I tried a lot to picture how it would be with 1 more. It was the first "vacation" that was fairly tantrum free and the kids were easy to occupy. I think the same would happen with another baby, but not until that baby is walking. The crawling/stumbling stage is really hard when you're outside so much!
(Sorry if that image is huge... I use the app)
@mamaqdubu it’s like the only outing that isn’t a super huge pita for me. I cried the first time I took them both out because it was SO hard! Also, what’s a nap? My kids don’t do that
did you find out the genders of your children?
Not with my first, yes with my second. (Both boys)
if/when you get pregnant again, will you find out?
Not sure! I think I would hope for a girl, but not enough to need to know. It was a fun experience to find out in that moment and have DH tell me!
if/when you get pregnant again, will you find out? absolutely! We’re so impatient! With DD2 we did the NIPT at 12 weeks and even that seemed like a life time. I can’t imagine having to wait the whole 9 months. I’m a planner (okay... maaaaybe a control freak) and like to prepare.
if/when you get pregnant again, will you find out?
I've alwayyyys said I want to find out because like @KFrob, I'm a planner and I love surprises but I HATE knowing that a surprise is coming because the suspense kills me. Also, I would love to be able to refer to my bump as the name we decide instead of just saying "it" or "the bump", etc. and actually getting to know my baby ahead of time. But lots of people that have waited say they loved it and I do love the idea of DH telling me like @mamaqdubu said. I suppose I still have lots of time to think about this. First it was taking forever to decide when to start trying, now I can agonize about to find out or not. Yaaaaay.
Due: 6 Nov 2021
How many children do you have currently? 2 little boys
How many more children do you think you might want? Just one, yeah I think just one. It's weird thinking about being done, because I'm also trying to decide if we're done now. But going through it twice I know how hard babies are and I don't know if I could do a 4th in my mid-late 30s at that point
What is holding you back from taking the plunge? DH is an only child, so it was a long drawn out conversation just to get to 2. When I was looking at the pile of baby gear after our youngest switched to a convertible car seat I asked him if we should start getting rid of this stuff or store it, he reminded me that he would have been fine with just 1 and he's never seen himself with more than 2. That being said, each time we get asked by other people if we're done, his answer changes. First it was "definitely done", then it was "I'm good with getting rid of the baby gear, but if you want to store it for a little while, that's ok too", to "I like to sleep", to "we've got our hands full right now". I can't tell if he's just tired of saying the same thing/finds it rude to blanket say no to acquaintances, or he's rethinking our future
Anything else you’d like to share? I honestly am still in a place where I don't even know if I want a third. Babies are hard, no joke. Those early days of night feedings, during dinner feedings, basically constantly nursing the kid. And then the early leaps and crying for what feels like hours... but I also know it doesn't last forever. Ugh, I really don't even know if I want to push it with DH or not
And then for the bonus questions:
did you find out the genders of your children? Yes with both. I was of the opinion that if the information was available, why not have it to make use of. Basically, I was impatient
if/when you get pregnant again, will you find out? Probably not for this last time around, if that happens. Since this would be the last baby, and I already have two boys, I don't want to spend the second half of a pregnancy being disappointed that I'll never have a little girl. I know you can make the exact argument in the other direction, and also I should be grateful no matter which sex the baby is, but preference happens. Plus one last big surprise making that last birth one to remember sounds fun
Edit for spelling
Married: 11/2013
M: 6/2016 E: 5/2018
Due: 6 Nov 2021
Yes and I cried both times.
if/when you get pregnant again, will you find out?
I’m pretty sure I can’t wait a whole pregnancy to find out, but I know I’ll be disappointed again if it’s a third boy. Not that I don’t love my boys or anything but... lol I’ve always pictured myself as a girl mom /shrug
I've always wanted to have 3 kids, but now that the time has come to pull the trigger it has been really hard for me to pull.
I think the biggest thing thats holding me back is that Ive always wanted a boy, ever since the beginning and Ive ended up with two wonderful girls, lol. Im convinced that the third will likely be a girl. Mostly because I think my husband is broke and only capable of making girls, hehe 😉.
But, having said that, I think we'll take the plunge anyway and what will be will be. Ultimately, as long as theoretical baby is healthy, it really is irrelevant the gender. But would be blown away if I could get that damn boy! 😛
<a href="https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12747537/wrw-october-2019#latest" title="Link: https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12747537/wrw-october-2019#latest">https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12747537/wrw-october-2019#latest</a><br>1 daughter
How many more children do you think you might want?
4, maybe 5
What is holding you back from taking the plunge?
Currently still breastfeeding but don’t want to wean just yet
Anything else you’d like to share?
My husband and I are not trying but not preventing.
How many children do you have currently?
3 sons
How many more children do you think you might want?
Who knows, we keep saying 4-6, but we're at three and I don't see us stopping soon.
What is holding you back from taking the plunge?
I'm still waiting for my first post-partum period (My youngest is 11 months, and I came off BC 2 weeks ago, I was expecting it to show up immediately because that's what it did the last two times, but it's nowhere to be seen.)
Anything else you’d like to share?
I took a pregnancy test this morning, and it was negative. I hate this uncertainty, I know I shouldn't complain because we've had three very easy TTC journey's so far, but the not knowing what's next is very hard for me.
That wait for your period to come back is tough. Hang in there!
I hope you are able to find peace with whatever you decide. (And I don't want to be presumptuous since you're an internet stranger, but the fact you're hanging out here makes me think you're probably leaning a specific way.)
we have one DD who just turned 7
How many more children do you think you might want?
What is holding you back from taking the plunge?
We are ttc at the moment, but I go back and forth so much. Since I’m the driving force behind this next baby it feels like a lot of pressure. There are moments I want it so desperately and then others where I don’t want to mess with this beautiful thing we’ve got. I mean DD is in school, sleeps through the night, super independent, potty trained (obviously). We are getting our life back, do I really want to start all over again? Then there are more moments of thinking of never having another baby, getting rid of all the baby stuff, never experiencing those sweet moments again that make my heart hurt.
Anything else you’d like to share?
I think I covered it all haha
DH: 37
Married: May 24, 2008
TTC #2 since: June 2020
My my main concern for you is actually that your husband isn’t even willing to discuss it. Do you think he’d be helpful if/when the new baby is born or do you feel that he would shrug his shoulders at you and say he was one and done?
1, she's just about 7mo
How many more children do you think you might want?
We've talked about having 2 or 3 more
What is holding you back from taking the plunge?
Right now we're just waiting until baby's 9mo to TTC again
Anything else you’d like to share?
It's a good thing hubs is strong-willed and keeping me in check for waiting. I'd be game to start trying now! Haha
2u2 is so much fun. You’re gonna love it. So excited for you!
I have 2 kids - a 6 year old and a 3 year old
How many more children do you think you might want?
One more
What is holding you back from taking the plunge?
Three things... 1.) My IUD (would need to go in to get it removed) 2.)My anxiety 3.)I am not one of those people that enjoy being pregnant, but I love the little human you get in the end.
Anything else you’d like to share? I was not very active for my first two pregnancies and struggled with my weight and mental health during and postpartum. It almost ruined my marriage after I had my son. I'm on therapy and have started living a healthier lifestyle since then. So I have a lot of anxiety about starting that all over again now that we are in such a good place again. If we decide to try for a third, I am determined to try to be much healthier and my husband says he will support me. But my anxiety is really keeping me from taking the plunge.
How many children do you have currently? 1 boy, 12 months
How many more children do you think you might want? At least 1 more. But MH and I are open to 2 more if the second ends up being a boy too.
What is holding you back from taking the plunge? I really wanted them to be 2 years apart, at least, in school. So I’ve been waiting for Dec lol. I also don’t want to have a summer baby since we are soooo active with camping and hiking and fishing… etc, in the summer. Winters in MN suck, and are the perfect time to have a newborn at home to cuddle with lol.
But with all that aside, I really just hope this journey is a smoother one than last time. It took us 22 months to conceive our first and I really don’t want to go through that again. It’s giving me some anxiety just thinking about it.
Anything else you’d like to share? I can’t wait to get this party started! I loved being pregnant and missed it for months after giving birth to my son lol. I know, I’m weird.
Married: 8/2015
TTC #1: 4/2017
Testing: HSG, U/S, BW, and DH's SA all normal
DX: Unexplained
8/2018: Clomid + TI = BFN
9/2018: Clomid + TI + Progesterone = BFN
11/2018: Clomid + IUI + Progesterone = BFN
12/2018: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone \\ Cancelled due to cyst
1/2019: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFP! \\ EDD Sept 30th, 2019
10/7/2019: Healthy baby boy!
TTC #2: 12/2020
2/2021: Letrozole + TI = BFN
3/2021: Letrozole + TI = BFN
4/2021: Surprise! Natural BFP! \\ EDD Jan 6th, 2022 \\ Chemical, betas not rising
8/2021: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFN
9/2021: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFN
10/2021: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFN
11/2021: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFP! \\ EDD July 29th, 2022
3 girls (12, 6, and 4)
How many more children do you think you might want?
at least 1
What is holding you back from taking the plunge?
finances, house size
I currently have 1 daughter who is not yet 16 months old.
How many more children do you think you might want?
I think I would like just one more child.
What is holding you back from taking the plunge?
Timing. It just isn't the right time. On top of the pandemic and worrying about financial issues because we don't know what is going to happen in the next couple years? I want a large age gap between my children (based on my experience with my own siblings and so many other reasons). I am hoping for a 6 to 8 year age gap between them.
Anything else you’d like to share?
I have known fertility issues. Endometriosis & PCOS. And I had to use clomid to get pregnant the first time. I want to wait until I'm at least 33 for my second baby but I'm worried it will work against me fertility wise.
If it were only up to me, and DH was on board, I would keep going until I couldn’t have more. But realistically hoping for just one more. Would be super excited (yet worried!) for twins.
DH isn’t quite ready; I need to finish getting vaccinated for varicella because my labs were “equivalent” (and vaccine coverage is historically low right now due to people skipping well child visits); I still have Mirena; still getting back into shape after having our two year-old
Anything else you’d like to share?
I’m on the tail end of recovering from parathyroid surgery. I have MEN1. And my H and I had our first three kids when we were really young. H had a vasectomy. Then we had it reversed and had three more kids.
George (3)
George (3)
I currently have two children. When we got married we agreed to 6. Ok, that wasn't realistic!
I think I would like just one more. But my husband is on the fence. So I guess I am here partly to see the pros and cons of having another,!
It has been 9 years since we had a baby, but as much as I try I cannot accept not having another...
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I have a three year old daughter and eight month old son.
How many more children do you think you might want?
I really thought I was done after number two. I never want to wear another article of nursing or maternity clothing again. I want to work on my body and be really healthy for the two I do have. I want more time to be able to work on projects (I’m a graphic designer and illustrator). Plus I have this heart arrhythmia that acts up when pregnant/postpartum. But now... I’m questioning not having a third. Just one more?
What is holding you back from taking the plunge?
All the above. But here’s the thing...
Anything else you’d like to share?
This notion of having another baby keeps creeping up in my subconscious. I think as a woman of child-bearing age, this might be natural. Like, I keep finding myself feeling happy at the idea of an “accident”. But this morning when I was half asleep I dreamed of a little girl - my third baby. And she was wonderful and I found myself really really wanting her. I couldn’t stop thinking of her all day. Aching for her. When I consider having a baby from my perspective, it’s NUTS. It’s hard enough being a mama of two. I’m always stressed and exhausted and worrying I’m not being a good mom to one or the other or both. But when I think of it from a little soul’s perspective...who could this person be? Become? What if she is just waiting to come live with us and be loved? Is that totally crazy?
What's holding me back from having my second? My doctor told me I had to wait a year after having my baby before I can start trying for a second one.
Anything else you'd like to share? Yes. I'm 41 and am scared to wait a full year before trying again, especially since I had three miscarriages preceeding my last pregnancy. My baby was born December 29th 2020. I want to bypass what the doctor says and start trying again. There is always room for second opinions. Any thoughts?
How many more children do you think you might want? 1 more
What is holding you back from taking the plunge? Uhm had my tubes tied 😭 regretting it. Trying to get hubby on board with a reversal.
the things holding me back are the fact that we are waiting to move into a new home, I would like my youngest to begin JK so I can be at home alone with new baby during the day, worrying about being able to comfortably afford a bigger family- but the biggest reasons and worries of all are the fact that I will probably need to have a third cesarean and the fact that I suffered from PPA for about a year after my second child was born. I have learned so much about PPA since then and about mental health so I think I will be able to be okay but it does worry me.
How many more children do you think you might want? 1
What is holding you back from taking the plunge? DH and I are going on vacation at the end of this month--to Hawaii!! Once we come back I am going to meet with my new provider to talk things through--I have an unusual medical history and am hoping for the possibility of a VBAC. I'm a lot less emotional about this than I thought I would be...but maybe living through a pandemic has shifted my perspective on things I can and cannot control.
Anything else you’d like to share? I was part of the July 2019 BMB and it was/is such an amazing group of women. We migrated to Facebook right before our babies were born and our group is still very active and supportive. I hope my second BMB, whenever that may be, can replicate some of that July '19 magic!
@happymom8 Welcome! Moving into a new home is exciting--are you staying in your current area? DH and I also waited until our daughter was old enough to be in preschool whenever a second baby was born so I could be home alone with a newborn. There are some providers that allow VBA2Cs--if you have a local chapter of ICAN, they may help you find one. I'm glad to hear you've come a long way in your mental health! It's amazing how much growth can happen in a short time.