I agree with both, you shouldn’t plan an induction or C-section solely based on a u/s, but if my insurance covers a mid third trimester scan and my doctor wants to do it, heck yeah I’ll see the baby!
In my case, my doctor wants all of the data points to inform on my VBAC.
******TW******Siggy warning BFP1 04/24/2015 EDD Dec 2015 MMC 10W5d; BFP 2 09/25/2015 EDD June 2016 MMC 9wks; BFP 3 03/22/2016 EDD Dec 6th 2016
The conversation re: cervical checks in the randoms thread got me thinking....for those of you who declined them, did your doctor understand or give you a hard time about it? If you had them done leading up to EDD, were you glad you did or will you not have them done this time?
ETA wanted to ask this here in case anyone wasnt follow randoms this week
@heyybritt no I don’t think it matters much to most providers whether you decline or not. Except for if you are in active labor and feel like pushing- I know some midwife groups are an exception but for the most part most providers want to ensure you are 10cm before pushing.
AFM my cervix was hard and closed up until my induction so really it was just discouraging even though I knew it meant nothing. I don’t know if I will get one again or not... I would say no but curiosity might get the better of me.
@heyybritt To me, any doctor who is pushy about these things and pushy about consent, isn't a doctor that deserves my business. I've gone through medical abuse, and internationally the US doesn't have great maternal or infant safety around birth, so I just flat out won't see doctors that don't respect me and having brains and choices. I'm the client. I'm not going to tell them each and every way to do their job, but I expect them to explain benefits, risks, and then I let them know if it's worth it to me.
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Me: 33 DH: 32 Married 7/18/15 1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16 Team green turned BLUE! 2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 Team green turned PINK! Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
@heyybritt my midwife never even offered and I had to ask. A doctor should only care about it if there is some medical concern. Just doing it to know isn’t necessary for the doctor until you’re in labor really 🤷🏻♀️
@heyybritt My Ob asked me if I wanted one at my 40w appointment, and I said sure why not the first time around. I was at 4cm and they swept my membranes because I was so done with being pregnant at that point. They told me to go home and have one last nice dinner with MH, and I went home thinking I was going to have a baby the next day. Nope. He wasn't born for another week after that. So this time when they ask at any point before 40w, I plan to say no thank you. They do need to check in order to admit you into L&D once you're in labor, though. At least at my hospital, they want you to be at 5cm, at least.
**TW**
Me: 35 | H: 40 Married Sept. 2013 DS1: Nov 11, 2016 MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d) CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d) BFP! 8/24/19 DS2: May 10, 2020
@shamrocandroll I don't mind checks once I'm in labor. I want to know what's going on, how long till I can get an epidural, and how long I can hold out without one.
When abouts do you start to really figure out babies positioning and try to get them in the right spot? Are there exercises/general things you do throughout to guide them or is this more of a corrective last few days/weeks/hours type situation?
Me: 30 | H: 34 Married July 2018 First-Time Mom EDD: 5/1/20 *please stick, baby*
@tj_2 I wouldn't *worry* about it yet but there are definitely things you can start doing now to encourage proper positioning towards the end. Doesn't mean they will be in that position right now. I think Spinning babies is a great resource and a lot of the exercises you can start doing now.
@tj_2 also, your OB or midwife should be able to feel your belly over the next month or so to get a good idea. Also also, the locations that you start feeling strong kicks will give you a general idea of the legs direction. Example: my DD loved jabbing her heel into my right lung/rib ☺️
@tj_2 +1 for spinning babies! They layout the different positions and stretches you can do and tell you at what weeks to do them. Your OB can feel around to try and figure out position, mine couldn't tell at 28 weeks and had a harder time finding the HB with the doppler so she brought in the portable bedside ultrasound to check positioning.
@tj_2 Spinning babies mentioned above, also Google Miles Circuit. Acupuncture and Chiropractic care in the whole last trimester promotes good positioning.
You don't really need to be too concerned until about 37 weeks (unless you're at risk of preemie birth), which is when most doctors will consider a manual turning of baby from the outside (ECV).
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Me: 33 DH: 32 Married 7/18/15 1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16 Team green turned BLUE! 2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 Team green turned PINK! Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
Thanks! Baby is head down and seems to be on the correct side based on spinning babies. I guess I expected I'd overdo the exercises and make the baby flip/spin out of the correct position 🤣
Me: 30 | H: 34 Married July 2018 First-Time Mom EDD: 5/1/20 *please stick, baby*
Thanks! Baby is head down and seems to be on the correct side based on spinning babies. I guess I expected I'd overdo the exercises and make the baby flip/spin out of the correct position 🤣
The upside is the exercises themselves aren't "making baby move" so much as providing the optimum circumstances for baby to get into the correct position. So they aren't likely to get a well-positioned baby out.
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Me: 33 DH: 32 Married 7/18/15 1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16 Team green turned BLUE! 2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 Team green turned PINK! Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
Has anyone done “laboring down?” It’s when you are fully dilated and effaced but wait some time (about an hour) before starting to push. The theory is that the contractions will move baby down without you having to exhaust yourself with pushing. I’m considering it but want to see what people’s experience has been
@sunshinesea22 I have not, I haven't ever even really heard it defined, but I did just read this. https://utswmed.org/medblog/delayed-pushing-no-benefits/ The risks include higher levels of infection and hemorrhage. Laboring down only shorted pushing time by an average of 9 minutes.
It's based on a study of women with epidurals, so the ACOG no longer recommends laboring down for women who get them, but I'm not sure about women who don't get an epidural. (Also I'm not saying anyone has to follow every ACOG recommendation.)
DD #1: April 2017 DD #2: May 2020 Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
@sunshinesea22 I would imagine that is just something that depends on how your labor goes and not really something that can be completely decided before hand.
For me, my water broke and I instantly felt the need to push. I was checked and only 9-9.5cm (no idea on effacement) so I had to not push until I was fully dilated. Honestly not pushing, when I felt like I had to push was probably the hardest, most difficult part of my labor. It was really tough to not let my body do what it was already doing without me. I don't remember how long I was in that stage... I feel like it wasn't too long and then I only ended up pushing for 10 minutes before she came out!
@catem07 thanks for the link! It’s been awhile since I did any reading on it. I don’t even remember where I first heard about it. Maybe they did a study at my sister’s hospital? They do a lot of those studies in the hospital where she worked for 5 years before traveling this year.
@m6agua I can imagine it would be hard to not push if baby was that close! I mean, I have no idea what it looks like when a baby is on its way out. Can you see if baby is still high and might need more pushing or if they’re really close and will come out in just a few pushes or do they all look the same and you really can’t tell how much pushing will be needed? Beats me. I guess that’s a good question for my sister.
@sunshinesea22 when I was in labor with DD1, I got to 10 cm and she wasn't quite far enough down yet, so they let me labor down for about an hour, and I had an epidural. I still had to push for almost 3 hours, so who knows if it was really effective, or alternately, maybe I should have labored down for longer. It's hard to say.
@sunshinesea22 I also think they mostly have you "labor down" if your doctor isn't available yet and they see the baby is ready to come out. I think without an epidural it's close to impossible for most women because of the urge to push. I had a really light epidural and they had me breathe through a few contractions instead of push and it was super difficult (and again, I had an epidural) haha.
My thoughts on "laboring down" are that pushing when your body isn't ready isn't likely helpful. 10 cm doesn't automatically mean ready for everyone. Likewise, trying to stop your body from pushing when it's trying to-equally unhelpful. I guess the best idea I've got is to listen to your body.
Also know that pushing on your back is the least efficient position. It stops your sacrum from being able to pop out and open the passage through pelvic bones, and it positions the birth canal as an uphill route.
My researched opinion is that not working with your body, or getting into a more optimal position to deliver likely leads to more surgical births than "laboring down." And that even at full dilation, you might not be ready to push, so waiting until you feel urge probably makes sense, but waiting for someone else's timeline sounds silly. You are giving birth, you are delivering. The care providers should be just watching to identify complications, and catching babies.
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Me: 33 DH: 32 Married 7/18/15 1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16 Team green turned BLUE! 2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 Team green turned PINK! Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
Starting to feel my stomach getting heavy and uncomfortably resting on or in between my thighs. Has anyone used a belt, kinesthetic tape or any other method to sort of hold up the belly that they liked? Would love to use something that's discreet under my regular clothes. Bonus points if it can be used post-partum or generally has multiple uses.
Me: 30 | H: 34 Married July 2018 First-Time Mom EDD: 5/1/20 *please stick, baby*
I had to wait for my doctor to come in to start pushing with DS1 and I will tell you for me even with an epidural, there was no stopping pushing, my body took over and I could not stop it.
So I asked my sister (the L&D nurse) this afternoon if you can tell how much pushing will be needed or if baby is up too high. She pretty much said what you ladies have said about the "laboring down," she said its mostly when mom doesn't feel the urge to push yet that it is helpful. She said there's no way to really tell how far away the baby is just by looking, it doesn't necessarily predict how much pushing will be required. She also mentioned that the hands and knees position is underutilized in labor and highly recommends that + some cat-cow on the floor (prior to epidural). That being said, my sister has yet to birth her own babies, but has assisted in welcoming hundreds to the world.
@sunshinesea22 I am an FTM so no actual experience, but wanted to chime in that I have heard great things about hands and knees and there’s probably a reason most all other mammals out there birth in what is essentially this position.
Starting to feel my stomach getting heavy and uncomfortably resting on or in between my thighs. Has anyone used a belt, kinesthetic tape or any other method to sort of hold up the belly that they liked? Would love to use something that's discreet under my regular clothes. Bonus points if it can be used post-partum or generally has multiple uses.
As I’ve mentioned a couple times, this pregnancy I’ve found belly wrapping with a ring sling to be relieving, though not as versatile because I can’t bring it to work to do it. (https://vimeo.com/320788560)
Has anyone used anything along the lines of thinx period panties or similar to manage postpartum bleeding/fluids? How does postpartum bleeding compare with the average period? Is something like this a viable option? I really just don't know what to expect in this department and how to best deal with it so I'm not hating life. I'm not typically a pad wearer and don't even know where to begin when shopping for these sorts of products and what I'd like or not. I'd like to have a few options on hand to try I guess.
@pirateduck My first 2-3 days were significantly heavier than my heaviest period (and I have heavy periods normally), but then the rest of first two weeks were about on par with a heavy period, and the 2 weeks after than more like a moderate/light day. Period panties would not have worked for me until the third/fourth week, unless I had 3-4 per day.
I loathe pads. Loathe. I did Depends underwear for first 2 ish days, then switched to heavy duty cloth pads (the disposables leave my labia and glorious thighs chafed and sore within two days) until ready for moderate/light flow cloth pads. Cloth isn't for everyone, I get that, but I just wash them with my cloth diapers, so it's no extra work/hardship for me. For all cloth catching bodily fluids, I do 2 full wash cycles, first one just to get the ick out, the second one so that they're actually getting clean, by washing with detergent in clean water.
But, for those who aren't into cloth, I still highly recommend Depends undies for the first couple days. And the first two ish weeks I did two overnight pads at once even when I did disposables-one more towards the front, one more towards the back, for extra length of coverage, with probably a 4-6" overlap. And slept on top of towels, in case of pad leaks and also because postpartum sweats are serious, so extra protection is good.
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Me: 33 DH: 32 Married 7/18/15 1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16 Team green turned BLUE! 2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 Team green turned PINK! Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
@pourmeanothermocktail which cloth ones did you like best? I feel like someone mentioned Pink Lemonade once. I feel like cloth would be gentler on sensitive bits. I will be doing cloth diaper laundry anyway.
I also did depends... for the first week maybe longer?, because of bleeding and because I got super ill and kept accidentally shitting and pissing myself. Also I think because even if I wore pads, blood seemed to drip down them while sleeping (getting my clothes and sheets dirty) rather than soaking in right away.
My friend uses period panties (maybe the Thinx brand, not sure) for her periods and she swears by them. I guess there are different levels you can buy for absorption or something. I for sure thought about it as I had recently stopped using tampons and only used pads. But I really dislike the plasticyness of them. I was looking into other options before I got pregnant.
@pirateduck Search cloth pads on amazon. There’s a ton of options that are way more reasonably priced that the pink lemonade and party in my pants brands that you’ll find with most cloth diaper retailers. I like the bamboo charcoal ones. Personally not a fan of any of the minky options. I found them to be slightly sweaty and the material just didn’t do it for me.
I never wear pads but I did for postpartum. I bled on and off for 6 weeks. I think I started with the heavy duty long ones and then kept buying smaller and smaller ones.
In fact the first time I left my newborn was when she was a week old or so. I had to go buy different sized pads because that was just not something I could send my husband to do (not because of embarrassment, but because he would have 100% bought the wrong ones).
DD #1: April 2017 DD #2: May 2020 Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
@pourmeanothermocktail which cloth ones did you like best? I feel like someone mentioned Pink Lemonade once. I feel like cloth would be gentler on sensitive bits. I will be doing cloth diaper laundry anyway.
I haven't tried them, but have heard great things. I have a few awesome overnights and super thin liners for pregnancy days by Party in my Pants, but due to cost, can't do a whole stash in them. So I filled out the rest with whatever cheap ones I found on Amazon, with fleece on top for extra cozy. The "overnight" type for cheap ones was maybe about the same as a medium absorbency from PIMP but closer to $3 per pad instead of $14. So I got overnight cheap pads for moderate days and moderate cheap pads for light days, lol. Worth it to me though. Paid the big bucks for the super overnight and queen size PIMP pads to get through first week though.
I do find cloth much much softer on sensitive bits.
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Me: 33 DH: 32 Married 7/18/15 1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16 Team green turned BLUE! 2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 Team green turned PINK! Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
@pirateduck If you wouldn't wear thinx panties for your period I wouldn't invest in them for postpartum. But I know people who wear them for their period and like them a lot, so if you're considering that it's worth it. (I use a cup myself)
DD #1: April 2017 DD #2: May 2020 Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
@catem07 I only ever use a cup as well but that doesn’t seem to be recommended postpartum so I’m trying to figure out what might be a tolerable alternative.
@catem07 I only ever use a cup as well but that doesn’t seem to be recommended postpartum so I’m trying to figure out what might be a tolerable alternative.
The worst part on postpartum bleeding is not being able to use my cup!
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Me: 33 DH: 32 Married 7/18/15 1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16 Team green turned BLUE! 2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 Team green turned PINK! Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
Re: BTDT - Questions for STM's
In my case, my doctor wants all of the data points to inform on my VBAC.
BFP1 04/24/2015 EDD Dec 2015 MMC 10W5d;
BFP 2 09/25/2015 EDD June 2016 MMC 9wks;
BFP 3 03/22/2016 EDD Dec 6th 2016
ETA wanted to ask this here in case anyone wasnt follow randoms this week
FTM
BFP: 9/5/19 ~ EDD 5/15/20
DH: 32
Married 7/18/15
1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
Team green turned BLUE!
2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18
Team green turned PINK!
Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
Married July 2018
First-Time Mom
EDD: 5/1/20 *please stick, baby*
- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019You don't really need to be too concerned until about 37 weeks (unless you're at risk of preemie birth), which is when most doctors will consider a manual turning of baby from the outside (ECV).
DH: 32
Married 7/18/15
1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
Team green turned BLUE!
2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18
Team green turned PINK!
Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
Married July 2018
First-Time Mom
EDD: 5/1/20 *please stick, baby*
DH: 32
Married 7/18/15
1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
Team green turned BLUE!
2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18
Team green turned PINK!
Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
It's based on a study of women with epidurals, so the ACOG no longer recommends laboring down for women who get them, but I'm not sure about women who don't get an epidural. (Also I'm not saying anyone has to follow every ACOG recommendation.)
DD #2: May 2020
Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
For me, my water broke and I instantly felt the need to push. I was checked and only 9-9.5cm (no idea on effacement) so I had to not push until I was fully dilated. Honestly not pushing, when I felt like I had to push was probably the hardest, most difficult part of my labor. It was really tough to not let my body do what it was already doing without me. I don't remember how long I was in that stage... I feel like it wasn't too long and then I only ended up pushing for 10 minutes before she came out!
- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019@m6agua I can imagine it would be hard to not push if baby was that close! I mean, I have no idea what it looks like when a baby is on its way out. Can you see if baby is still high and might need more pushing or if they’re really close and will come out in just a few pushes or do they all look the same and you really can’t tell how much pushing will be needed? Beats me. I guess that’s a good question for my sister.
Also know that pushing on your back is the least efficient position. It stops your sacrum from being able to pop out and open the passage through pelvic bones, and it positions the birth canal as an uphill route.
My researched opinion is that not working with your body, or getting into a more optimal position to deliver likely leads to more surgical births than "laboring down." And that even at full dilation, you might not be ready to push, so waiting until you feel urge probably makes sense, but waiting for someone else's timeline sounds silly. You are giving birth, you are delivering. The care providers should be just watching to identify complications, and catching babies.
DH: 32
Married 7/18/15
1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
Team green turned BLUE!
2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18
Team green turned PINK!
Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
Married July 2018
First-Time Mom
EDD: 5/1/20 *please stick, baby*
I loathe pads. Loathe. I did Depends underwear for first 2 ish days, then switched to heavy duty cloth pads (the disposables leave my labia and glorious thighs chafed and sore within two days) until ready for moderate/light flow cloth pads. Cloth isn't for everyone, I get that, but I just wash them with my cloth diapers, so it's no extra work/hardship for me. For all cloth catching bodily fluids, I do 2 full wash cycles, first one just to get the ick out, the second one so that they're actually getting clean, by washing with detergent in clean water.
But, for those who aren't into cloth, I still highly recommend Depends undies for the first couple days. And the first two ish weeks I did two overnight pads at once even when I did disposables-one more towards the front, one more towards the back, for extra length of coverage, with probably a 4-6" overlap. And slept on top of towels, in case of pad leaks and also because postpartum sweats are serious, so extra protection is good.
DH: 32
Married 7/18/15
1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
Team green turned BLUE!
2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18
Team green turned PINK!
Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
My friend uses period panties (maybe the Thinx brand, not sure) for her periods and she swears by them. I guess there are different levels you can buy for absorption or something. I for sure thought about it as I had recently stopped using tampons and only used pads. But I really dislike the plasticyness of them. I was looking into other options before I got pregnant.
- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019In fact the first time I left my newborn was when she was a week old or so. I had to go buy different sized pads because that was just not something I could send my husband to do (not because of embarrassment, but because he would have 100% bought the wrong ones).
DD #2: May 2020
Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
I do find cloth much much softer on sensitive bits.
DH: 32
Married 7/18/15
1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
Team green turned BLUE!
2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18
Team green turned PINK!
Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
DD #2: May 2020
Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
DH: 32
Married 7/18/15
1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
Team green turned BLUE!
2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18
Team green turned PINK!
Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green