May 2020 Moms
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Re: UO Thursday 1/23

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  • @mamaqdubu SAME. The app is hell. My April 2017 BMB moved to Facebook in January 2017. I'll add that I do not want to go to a private TB group first. We don't have a huge group and I don't think that's necessary. 
    DD #1: April 2017
    DD #2: May 2020
    Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022

  • @catem07 I don't even know what a private TB group is.... so.... same? lol
  • @mamaqdubu It's basically the same as this but invite-only. Some BMBs I guess do that before moving to FB? I dunno, I've seen mention of it but have never been in one. 
    DD #1: April 2017
    DD #2: May 2020
    Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022

  • I guess I'm in a different camp, I would prefer to stay here and do a private group near or after the babies come. Then eventually add on social media.

    With TB loading issue on the app, I found if you click on the thread and then press the refresh button (upper right) then the page comes up faster. Or just using the web browser on your phone vs the app.
    _______________________________________________
    TTC#1 July 2015 
    • BFP: 9/16/15 — MC: 11/8/15 Blighted Ovum
    • BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
    TTC#2 April 2019 
    • BFP: 9/12/19 — EDD 5/15/20

  • I think I’m with @mamaqdubu, simply because I find Facebook wayyyyyy easier to use than stupid TB. But I agree with @m6agua that it’s a lot easier to deal with TB in my mobile browser than in the app.
  • @ruby696 I swear for me it's partly because so many people don't have a signature (for a variety of reasons including the damn app). It's hard for me to connect what one person says in one thread to that same person in another. 
    DD #1: April 2017
    DD #2: May 2020
    Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022

  • @catem07 That's a really good point. I have quite a history for a signature, but it won't let me do it on mobile. Which is annoying. 
  • I could go either way. I would probably tend to share more in a private setting. My last BMB (May baby) moved to a private group in January and then to FB in February so the private group didn't last long but it kind of helped weed out the non participators. 
  • We had some success moving a group from a message board to a small group on FB messenger for awhile and it was nice to get updates and chat with people that way.  Personally I am at peace with shutting down my FB account a few years ago and don't really have any intention of creating a new one.  FB changed and evolved over the years in general and I don't like the direction it went.  Maybe it can foster relationships with strangers (like this message board can), but I think it tends to be detrimental to relationships with people you know in the real world vs. just on the internet, among other things.  I'm not going to get on my soap box about the perils of social media here, I'm just saying that trying to move from one platform to another there are going to be people that are lost just because they don't have an account and actively participate in whichever platform you choose, we all already have Bump accounts.
  • I'm on team PG first.  It's too big of a step for me to go from this public BMB where I'm just a screen name and avatar of a puppy to FB where everyone has my name, visibility to some pics of my kid (profile pic, for example), and some amount of personal details, even though I keep it fairly locked down.

    I was in the same BMB and PG as @m6agua and I liked how there were different levels of getting to know each other.  We moved to a big PG, which we did a vetting for to make sure people were who they said they were and enough people recognized them as active participants, and there we started to post more personal details and photos with our faces and got to know each other better.  Then we did the big split to FB, which is where we lost some ladies who were anti-FB at the time.  I still talk to that smaller group of ladies every day to this day.  I do think there's an advantage to moving to a smaller, more private, safer space before the babies arrive, personally.  I won't post pictures of myself or my children here since anyone can see them.  
    **TW**
    Me: 35 | H: 40
    Married Sept. 2013
    DS1: Nov 11, 2016 <3
    MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
    CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
    BFP!  8/24/19
    DS2: May 10, 2020 <3


  • @ruby696 I agree that I don’t feel like I know anyone very well and that a PG could help with that. One thing that helps me is knowing people’s real first names and what they look like, and I think people would be at least somewhat comfortable posting that stuff in a PG as opposed to here. I’d be down for a PG before moving to FB.
  • Agree that I'm not quite ready to be on FB. I'm worried about posting in the google doc because my phone has my personal google accounts and my school one linked.
    But question: Is the PG on the bump? If my last BMB did that I was oblivious. 
  • @shamrocandroll Thank you! I never knew that was a thing on TB. 
  • I agree with @shamrocandroll that regular participation should be required. The intent of a PG is to be able to share more about yourself and your family. People who don't regularly participate are basically strangers.
  • If it wasn't/isn't clear, PG=private group on The Bump.

    Which I agree is a great next step to get to know people better.

    For those having app issues, I never use it, always the website on my mobile browser.

    My UO-I think birds in general are scary and unpleasant. I don't like them as pets, and I really dislike wild geese and stuff. Terrified of bigger birds peacocks and turkeys, and especially emus and ostriches. Have met all up close and it was awful. 
    _______________________________________________
    Me: 33
    DH: 32
    Married 7/18/15
    1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
    Team green turned BLUE!
    2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 
    Team green turned PINK!
    Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green

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  • oh @pourmeanothermocktail as soon as we have a little more land I'm getting a pair of geese and some turkeys!  I already have chickens and large ducks that I have bred.  I can't wait until spring when I can hopefully get two more chickens, but we'll see how that times out with the whole baby on the way.  I will agree though that geese can be terrifying and are extremely territorial in breeding season.
  • @pirateduck No thanks. Those birds are only for eating as far as I'm concerned. You do you, but I'm not visiting without protection. Maybe a riot suit. Maybe just a big dog. ;)
    _______________________________________________
    Me: 33
    DH: 32
    Married 7/18/15
    1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
    Team green turned BLUE!
    2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 
    Team green turned PINK!
    Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • I agree that it's hard to get to know people but also the bump is just really annoying to work with unless you're able to get on multiple times every day. It's hard to reply to keep up with thing that you may have missed - FB is so much easier to have an actual conversation and see what other people have said. 
  • @pourmeanothermocktail I have an entertaining image in my head now of someone in a riot suit being chased by an angry goose  :D
  • @pourmeanothermocktail I have an entertaining image in my head now of someone in a riot suit being chased by an angry goose  :D
    These feral cats, they understand (link to a blog post regarding a peacock named Goofus). https://lazyevaluationranch.tumblr.com/post/101718684710/112-today-goofus-the-peacock-killed-a-mouse-and

    Side note-when I was maybe 6 my grandma had me help her feed the flock of maybe 200 geese and 2 swans that hung out in the pond behind her house. They were mean. I was tiny. Riot gear keeps everyone safe. :smiley:
    _______________________________________________
    Me: 33
    DH: 32
    Married 7/18/15
    1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
    Team green turned BLUE!
    2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 
    Team green turned PINK!
    Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @pourmeanothermocktail I remember when I was a kid the Canada Geese would come through on migration and they would take over the soccer field when we were supposed to have practice or a game and it was terrifying.
  • @pourmeanothermocktail Swans are vicious when they're nesting. I've read stories of them killing dogs. I mean, riot gear isn't a bad idea...
  • I'd love to be able to join a private group and get to know everyone better! I agree that being super candid and open in a larger group is weird for me. I would also probably prefer to join a bump PG first but am not entirely against a fb group down the road. 
  • I also agree with the PG!

    As for the birds, I have a lilac tree in my yard that little birds love, int summer there are hundreds of them and their chirping is soothing. I would never have one as a pet though, they freak me out. My sister had one and i swear it could smell my fear. Id be sitting at the table and it would walk on the table right in front of me back and forth taunting me. and would sometimes jump up my arm onto my shoulder and would cling on for dear life. It was terrifying. 
  • I hate TB but agree about wanting an intermediary step before opening up so much information on FB. But ultimately I'd rather use FB and would have a much easier time responding to other people vs. mostly posting my own updates. I agree with what @chewie5990 said about keeping up throughout the day and all. So yea PG then FB is my vote I guess.
  • I am good with whatever way we go but I do agree that a smaller more private setting would be nice to have, I think people feel like they can be more open when it is a group who we know is active. My first BMB we did this and are now all on FB together, I honestly don't think anyone has posted on the board in years. 

    As for birds, they are terrifying and gross. When we lived on the farm I hated hated hated the chickens (mainly because the rooster was an asshole). 

    My UO: I hate flowers. Like in the house, they all die and fall apart, and are not worth it. (DF was sweet and got me some and I realized in this how much I do not enjoy the dying plants in my house).
  • I'm also down for a PG. I haven't facebooked in a few years so I wouldn't participate in that, but a PG where it's a smaller group and we can be more candid sounds nice.
  • I'm team FB group over PG, I'm so tired of the app. I can't get on here until nighttime when I can use my laptop. The app isn't working at all for me this week. 
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  • @Austenista I started using the bump on my google chrome ap on my phone instead of tb app. Works so much better!
  • @mamaj1220 totally agree about the flowers! MH got me flowers one time and I told him never again! Such a waste of money! I do enjoy indoor potted plants though - I can at least keep those alive long enough to enjoy them.
  • I was moving out of my college apartment and carrying an insanely heavy large tv (the huge backed ones before flat screens) when I got chased by a goose. I literally had to run away from a hissing, terrifying goose chasing me while carrying this tv. How I did it, I will never know! But I am terrified of geese now! 
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  • @mamaqdubu sounds good! I think it's an appropriate timeline.
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