I really dislike "cancel culture." And related to that I hate how ultra super politically correct everyone and everything has to be all the time now. It's probably a little too soon after me joining the board to have an opinion more spicy than not liking Pumpkin Spice Lattes since none of you know I'm not just some raging asshole bigot or something.
Why is it so hard to use gifs on the mobile app? Ugh.
Me: 28 Husband: 31 TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016 Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
@NamelessAria Do you save the gif to your phone as an image and then insert it like you would a pic? I think it used to be more difficult but I’ve not had an issue
Also as for your UO. I haven’t heard of the term cancel culture so I googled it. If I’m understanding correctly this means if someone posted something offensive you immediately boycott them? Instead of educating them as to why their post might be insensitive? I don’t understand that, but I do think that the phrase “politically correct” is sometimes confused with just being sensitive, aware of privilege, etc. Not saying that is what you are doing since I don’t know what issues you are referring to. But I appreciate seeing others’ perspectives as to why something could be offensive if I haven’t thought of it that way before. AndI agree there are better ways to go about it than just shunning the person, especially if they were just naive.
Actually, I know you from TTCAL. Well, guess I should say my friend dpjennifer knew you. So, I'll join your ranting rage... I agree about the overly political correctness/politeness issue. A movie a certain segment of my friends really enjoys is "Blazing Saddles" so it comes up regularly that a movie like that could NEVER be made nowadays.
@bows22 no I didn't save the image. That's what I've been doing wrong! Thank you. Now I know. I previously always used the computer to access TheBump so I'm still adjusting to the mobile app. 😩 I liked the computer better.
What kinda prompted the UO is I like to watch makeup videos on YouTube to unwind (there is something so fun about watching people play with makeup. Not sure what or why.) This one chick o was watching seemed nice enough and I had never seen anything political or whatever in her makeup reviews so perfect for just escaping the nonsense of the world. But on one of her videos someone started talking about how she lost a lot of subscribers when she got "canceled" and I was curious so I went Googling. Apparently in 2017 she tweeted something about how she loved seeing support for women in the comment section of her posts and even if we don't always agree it's great that people's opinions are being heard. Then she hashtagged it "#prolifefeminist" and people lost their minds. A lot of people started boycotting her and any makeup brand with whom she had ever collaborated over the tweet. And like, I guess I just don't understand how it was so wildly offensive that people who claimed to have been subscribers for years who apparently loved her just suddenly felt like she was the worst person ever and they couldn't follow her on Twitter or watch her YouTube content anymore. I finished catching up on all the drama and I was like "...what?" Apparently it's pretty common for brands to get "canceled" over tweets or posts on other social media. And while I am sure there are occasionally people/brands who do or say some truly terrible things where people shouldn't support them most of the examples I saw in some quick Googling just kinda seemed like things that had been massively blown out of proportion.
Like I'm all for holding people accountable for their actions. And I do believe that a little sensitivity goes a long way. But I don't know. I feel like cancel culture takes the good idea of holding people accountable and goes a little too far with it in many cases. It just feels a little too reactionary and a little too extreme for most things in life I guess. If Hitler had a makeup brand yes let's cancel it. If someone from a different religion or potical party or culture has a makeup brand let's just agree to disagree and go on with out lives.
I don't know if I'm even making sense. I kept having nightmares last night and got approximately no sleep so I'm a zombie today.
Me: 28 Husband: 31 TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016 Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
@NamelessAria that happens often too with sports figures and such. Like a tweet from when they were a teenager gets resurfaced and everybody loses their mind and demand they be removed from the sport, etc. We all have said stupid stuff when we were young, why do people make that such a big deal?
I'm always amazed how people's tunes can change just because they find out a fact about someone. Like they were totally cool being that person's friend without knowing that information and then they throw the friendship out the window like their entire friendship meant nothing.
*TW* History:
Me: 34 DH: 36 | Together since 2007 | Married July 2016
TTC #1 since 7.2017 Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3| all BFN IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name" RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer 2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20 Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21 Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023 Consultation with RI | 6.6.23 Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56 Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox Repeat labs in 8 weeks Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues TTC put on pause
When I see people take hardline stances like #prolifefeminist I’m ok with them being cancelled (or cancel cultured? How would I say that?). You’re alienating a whole lot of people that way.
I just think about a mom that might have terminated a very wanted and loved baby for medical reasons trying to watch a damn make up video read that and it’s not ok. We don’t know what we’ll face in this life or what choices we’ll make. So that, to me, was an understandable boycott.
My UO, which is sort of in line with everything else that has been mentioned so far, is that I strongly believe people are far too sensitive these days. About anything and everything. It's like, no one else can have an opinion without someone being deeply hurt by it, and heave forbid you disagree with someone - that's when they up and "cancel" you.
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
Me: 34 DH: 36 | Together since 2007 | Married July 2016
TTC #1 since 7.2017 Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3| all BFN IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name" RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer 2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20 Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21 Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023 Consultation with RI | 6.6.23 Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56 Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox Repeat labs in 8 weeks Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues TTC put on pause
I do think there are people who "deserve" to be cancelled, honestly. I just question how we as a society decide who to cancel, and I worry about the mob mentality that it creates.
That being said, I'm perfectly happy to quietly unfollow or walk away from someone who says something I find problematic or offensive. No need to be dramatic and tell the world I'm unfollowing. I used to follow a blogger back in the day (8 years ago!) who said some really awful weight-related stuff, and I just unsubscribed from her on every platform. No harm, no foul.
me: 35 / so: 34 | ttc #1 since 9/2018
DX: MFI IVF Cycle #1 February 2020 4 embryos frozen, 1 fresh transfer = CP FET #1 Natural Cycle March 2020 CXL'd due to Covid-19 FET #1 Natural Cycle June 2020 - CP #2 FET #2 Natural Cycle July 2020 - BFP!!!!!! Beta #1 = 273
When you guys say people are too sensitive or overly politically correct, what are you specifically referring to? I’m genuinely curious in what you guys perceive to be too much.
I used to hold similar opinions but found it was rooted in misunderstanding. It didn’t offend or upset me so I had a hard time grasping why it would upset someone else.
Are there instances where it’s over the top? Of course! There’s always someone that’s gonna be ridiculous. But in general I’m ok with erring on the side of sensitivity. My one singular experience and worldview benefits from listening to others who have experienced this same world from a different lens.
Dirty lurker here (I hang back to keep an eye on some friends I've been quietly cheering on for many months). Feel free to flame my ass out of here after this and I'll shut up.
But I just came to say... okay... *sigh* Prior to the last election, I lived in a happy little bubble where everything was cool, racism was dead, gays could be gayly gay, the future of the environment was secure, women were people, and all seemed so groovy.
Then 2016 came and I realized there is a HUGE segment of America (mostly disenfranchised white men) that emerged from under their rocks, crawled out of their evidence huts, grabbed their white robes and marched to the voting booth. Nasty, abhorrent groups and individuals suddenly became empowered. I had no idea there were so many white nationalists, nazis, conspiracy theorists, crazy nut jobs, and all around just wicked human beings. After the election Muslim students on the campus where I work had food thrown at them and were told to "go home." Synagogues nearby were vandalized and spray painted with swastikas. A friend of mine with short hair was abused by an older man who shouted at her "Grow your hair and be a woman. This is TRUMP'S AMERICA now." All across the country, draconian abortion laws were being drafted. Trans people openly attacked. Immigrants seeking asylum separated from their children who face tragic abuse at the hands of ICE. Laws protecting the environment being torn to shreds, national parks being reduced to make room for oil production, massive tax cuts to the very wealthy while the rest of us get a handful of loose change... it's just too much.
I used to be "can't we all just get along" but not anymore. Any time I see even a small amount of racism, bigotry, xenophobia, hatred of any form, I CALL IT OUT. Unashamedly. I've lost touch with a few relatives over it. Fuck it. I can't handle open tolerance of this level of tyranny, corruption, hatred, and promotion of rolling back civil rights and environmental protections. I will NOT go back to the kitchen, I will NOT sit in my closet and be quiet, and I will NEVER stop defending the very people whose voice is being silenced by this shit show of an administration.
@mvt2003 I 100% agree no body deserves to be "cancelled"!! But I do what you do and quietly choose to stop following some people or I'll hide their posts from my FB feed. They still exist to me though.
@tyrion_ one example that comes to mind, and I will probably really be in the UO here but here we go - Women taking compliments the wrong way and getting way to sensitive then calling it harrassement. Don't get me wrong, I am all for women's rights, clearly, and I am all for the #metoo movement - but I think there are a lot of people out there that take offense and take it the wrong way when a man tells them they look really pretty today, or that they like their hair. My old boss would say to us sometimes "Is it okay if I tell you your hair looks really nice today? Is that allowed?"
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
For me personally, I've cancelled Chick Fil-A, which I love... but their stance is so strong against gays. My SIL is gay and I'm very close with her. I would never want to support a company who so opening supports anti-gay groups (I will not go into further details but there's been a lot going on with them recently). I also will not shop at Hobby Lobby. To each their own, I'm not upset at people who frequent these businesses and will continue to maintain our relationships, but I personally will no longer shop/eat at these establishments.
I also agree that people tend to be over-sensitive. However, I understand that people are sensitive to the areas that hit home the hardest. For me, it's gays and disabled (my mom has MS). I also cringe anytime someone uses the "R" word to describe something that is silly/crazy/whatever. I'm not going to stop all contact with that person, but I will distance myself because IMO they not only sound ignorant, but extremely prejudice. And more often than not (in my experience) if I try to "educate" them, they would tell me I'm being oversensitive, so I don't bother.
Me: 33 DH: 36 Dating 4/2008 Married 6/2016 TTC #1 9/2019 BFP 12/13/2019! EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@kpearse99 While I don't feel that it needs to be that way... I'm glad your boss errs on the side of caution and is sensitive to how you make take a compliment. He sounds like an all-around nice guy. Compliments on hair are always welcomed... compliments on my tiny feet are not so much (weirdo guy in line at Michaels a few years back... I felt gross the rest of the day and get the same feeling when I think about it).
Me: 33 DH: 36 Dating 4/2008 Married 6/2016 TTC #1 9/2019 BFP 12/13/2019! EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@wishiwaspreggo 👏👏👏👏 I need that kind of courage to call my and DH's family out. One of my cousin's and his wife are very pro-life and just... No, I do not like a lot of what they say on that topic. I respect their idea but I don't agree with it which is why I just don't say anything. I guess I'm more of a "don't ruffle feathers to keep the peace" kind of person.
*TW* History:
Me: 34 DH: 36 | Together since 2007 | Married July 2016
TTC #1 since 7.2017 Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3| all BFN IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name" RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer 2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20 Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21 Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023 Consultation with RI | 6.6.23 Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56 Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox Repeat labs in 8 weeks Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues TTC put on pause
While I detest the term “cancel culture” and haaaate arbitrary “you’re cancelled” declarations, I do think there’s some good to be found in the underlying ideology. When someone or something (ie: a corporation) actively works to insult or suppress the rights of others, fuck yes, they deserve to be boycotted. But as Barack Obama recently said, cancel culture is not activism. Cancelling someone and walking away does not change society for the better. Educating, mobilizing a group to take action against a wrong — that’s activism and that’s what we should be working towards. If “cancelling” is a stop along the way to a greater goal, I’m ok with that.
I also strongly disagree that people are “too sensitive” these days. Minorities and the oppressed are so often completely dismissed with the phrase “you’re too sensitive.” Take a moment to ask yourself WHY someone is taking something offensively. Ask yourself why you’re dismissing their feelings. If there’s a change you can make to be more inclusive, DO IT. So often the people making the accusation of oversensitivity are in a position of privilege. Don’t let your privilege blind you, even if you truly believe you’re coming from a good place.
@kmalls, I understand what you are saying and my comment was not in regards to situations like minorities or people being dismissed. I am a very inclusive person and accepting of every one but I also do think that people sometimes read into to things too literally instead of just taking a comment for what it is. And this is all coming from a person who was made fun and bullied (what would have been considered bullying back in my day anyway) for a decent amount of her school years leading up to high school. This is also coming from someone who bends over backwards to make everybody else happy before making herself happy. Maybe I just have really thick skin and am able to let things roll off her back more easily than others, and I can accept that, but I do take other's opinions and feelings into account way more than one probably should.
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
I also strongly disagree that people are “too sensitive” these days. Minorities and the oppressed are so often completely dismissed with the phrase “you’re too sensitive.” Take a moment to ask yourself WHY someone is taking something offensively.
@kpearse99 I’m not calling out anyone specifically in this post, rather drawing attention to the fact that sensitivity in many cases is warranted. Not an attack on you!
@kpearse99 This is why I asked for an example of what people meant. Because I viewed it in the same line as @kmalls but had a hunch that many had a different take on people being too sensitive (which you did). This is why I enjoy having calm, rational discussions because things like this can be clarified.
@inthewoods23 - I got into a nasty fight with my cousin over abortion rights (his stance is abortion is never permissible, even if a woman's life is in danger or she was raped). I was frothing mad afterwards. Then I got in a fight with his sister over gay marriage (she got divorced and that's totally cool but I'm married for 15 years to my wife and *I'M* the deviant? Bitch). Lost touch with both of them. Then found out my pious male cousin, so holy and good, a youth minister, cheated on his wife. I wanted to hop in my car and drive to his house and scream at him in person. TW
She gave him 4 children, all under 10 years old, and he just walked out on them to follow his dick to greener pastures.
I held it together, though, and haven't caused a scene though I wanted to. Ugh.
On the one hand I'm proud of myself for giving the jumping off point for a good discussion in the UO this week. On the other hand I'm like
Kinda wondering if maybe I should have gone with how playing Christmas music and decorating before it's even Thanksgiving is too soon. Ya know, a safe UO where I'm not spending my day worrying everyone thinks I'm a twatwaffle or something now.
@wishiwaspreggo sometimes people amaze me with their hypocrisy and how rude and judgemental they are. Because seriously who are you and your wife hurting by being together? No one. Literally no one. You're two consenting adults who love each other and you're happy. Who is your cousin hurting when he walks out on his family? His entire family. If he wants to judge anyone he needs to find a mirror and let himself have a piece of his mind. Otherwise he needs to keep his nonsense to himself because WTF dude? I'm sorry that your family treated you that way. Its unfair and horrible.
Me: 28 Husband: 31 TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016 Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
@NamelessAria What is the purpose of life if we can’t grow and learn from each other, though? If you hadn’t brought this up we would have missed an opportunity to better ourselves and missed an opportunity to listen to a differing perspective. I am thankful it was posted 💗
@NamelessAria if I thought you were a twatwaffle I’d def call you a twatwaffle. It’s such a great/hilarious word! But I don’t think you’re a twatwaffle and I’m really glad this conversation is taking place
@wishiwaspreggo I believe your cousin and my cousin have the same viewpoint on abortion and that is just really unfortunate 😟
*TW* History:
Me: 34 DH: 36 | Together since 2007 | Married July 2016
TTC #1 since 7.2017 Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3| all BFN IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name" RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer 2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20 Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21 Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023 Consultation with RI | 6.6.23 Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56 Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox Repeat labs in 8 weeks Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues TTC put on pause
@NamelessAria - FWIW I didn't think you were part of the examples I was giving. But that being said, I think the reason for this heightened sensitivity is that many of us "snowflakes" are sick of this alt-right bullshit and we feel the need to shut it down as soon as we see it. Fascist atrocities happen because good people don't speak up.
I’m in Vermont, so I was very much in my liberal bubble prior to 2016.
I do sometimes think people here can be “too sensitive” but I wouldn’t phrase it like that. I would call it an unrealistic view of the world. An example - I know many many people who have changed names, pronouns, etc without being explicitly trans. And changed more than once. They are offended when you don’t ask / use the wrong name / pronoun the next time you see them. Now, absolutely call someone out if you are gender fluid and go by “they/them” and tell someone and that person refuses to acknowledge/ use it. But if you introduce yourself as she/her or he/him, and those pronouns are used - people around you are not being discriminatory if they don’t ask / use the correct pronoun without you telling them when there is a change. I don’t think that’s being sensitive per se. I just think that is reading more into someone using an outdated pro noun than is happening. It’s an intent vs impact thing.
Side note- I tend to avoid pro nouns and names as a matter of course unless I am really really sure now. Because I have seen otherwise very considerate, liberal friends dragged over the coals for it.
This is what my local community is dealing with, so it was 💯 eye opening that people are being fired, ostracized and murdered in other parts of the country for things like this. Or even what seems to be very normal- same sex monogamists. 🤷♀️ The deacon in my church is married to another man, my pastor is a woman, and it’s a pretty conservative church for the area.
It’s absolutely SHAMEFUL that the US doesn’t have publicly funded, free to the consumer health care. My life isn’t worth more than yours because we can afford treatment and you can’t and no one should be going bankrupt because they get sick or injured.
We’ve spent 70k oop due to my health in the last four years. Probably another 12k coming due to DH breaking his back. We can barely afford this, and we make over six figures, in a lower cost of living area for our state. What about people living on the median? The median for our town is 46k for a family of 4. At that, they won’t qualify for Medicare, very little in subsidies, and an event like this would bankrupt them. It very well might bankrupt us.
A more light-hearted UO.... Listening to the same song on repeat is totally okay. I have spent entire work days listening to only 1 song. Perfectly acceptable in my book and not weird.
*TW* History:
Me: 34 DH: 36 | Together since 2007 | Married July 2016
TTC #1 since 7.2017 Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3| all BFN IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name" RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer 2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20 Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21 Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023 Consultation with RI | 6.6.23 Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56 Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox Repeat labs in 8 weeks Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues TTC put on pause
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
@wishiwaspreggo You are my hero today.♥️♥️♥️♥️. I agree 1000% with everything you so passionately stated and, @kmalls, as someone who identifies as a person of color (but is often assumed to be white) it is a RELIEF to hear someone share a stance with me who may not share my background. People of color get.so.tired! of having to explain the concepts you stated so eloquently . ♥️♥️♥️♥️ Shoutouts to @tyrion & @ziggymama06 & @the_road_to_oz too. It takes courage to speak up the way you do and did today.
Thanks to everyone who posted & calmly contributed to this thoughtful conversation. Nice job, ladies. I’m proud of us today!
P.S. @kpearse99 I’m also a hardcore feminist 💯 and support the #metoo movement till every dirty dick goes down. Buuuut, like you, I do think there’s a culture of hyper-sensitivity to what is now being interpreted as “harassment”. Example: I was sitting next to a male co-worker having a good conversation. I gave him some news that shocked him. His reaction was to open his eyes wide and grab my leg like, “No way!” He immediately caught himself & pulled his hand away quick, as if he thought I’d report him. That’s sad. I could tell he had no ill intent whatsoever. At the same time, I had a disgusting boss who thought he was slick & loved to bring up his love of the current political administration at every opportunity—which is just totally inappropriate for a work space. He was a bully & was always throwing micro-aggressions my way. One day I walked into his office to discuss something he’d done poorly & that I now needed to fix. Before I could open my mouth he said sleazily, “You really have great hair, you know that?” I stone-cold stared him down without responding & he took a gulp. His intent was definitely not innocent & that moment still creeps me out. These two experiences showed me that it can be hard to know when one should react and when it might be “over-reacting”. I guess my point is that even though I do think some people overreact, it’s not my place to judge because I’ve been in those micro-aggression situations & could feel that it was harassment even though it might look innocent to the next person, and in some situations where a guy got nervous that he’d crossed an extremely thin and unclear line that I wasn’t worried about at all. Just my two cents added to this interesting dialogue.
@emeraldduchess Same andI don’t like the blue Christmas lights. I think it looks depressing lol
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
@keikilove yes, that’s what I was trying to express exactly!!! So many times it’s completely innocent and harmless and then there is instant awkwardness. It’s like the innocence and sincerity have been taken all out of it because things get twisted so quickly. But then of course you have sleazy people who do mean in that way and think they can get away with everything and anything. They ruin it for the good ones
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
@inthewoods23 I agree! Now you need to tell us what song.
I have another light UO. I don't like pink Christmas decorations.
In that vein, my UO is I don't like glittery Christmas decorations. Do I like how the snow outside glitters? Yes. But I don't want that shyte in my home. My Christmas aesthetic is more primitive/farmhouse.
And as @the_road_to_oz mentioned, healthcare in this country is downright shameful. As a clinical mental health counselor, I hate having to tell potential clients that we don't accept their insurance plan, only to hear the sound of defeat in their voice before they hang up. I also have watched my brother's journey with MS (diagnosed in 2017, and he's only 30) and seeing him fight to get the infusions his body so badly needs. He cannot work because of his disorder, so he doesn't qualify for the type of medical insurance he needs for his disorder. It's ridiculous. I am watching my baby brother suffer and there isn't a thing I can do about it.
@ttcbabyodo I am so sorry for your brother’s situation. That is so f-ing unfair. It is the same sad & frustrating story with Lyme disease treatment. It is absolutely horrifying what “healthcare” has become in this country from a business side of things.
@the_road_to_oz You are so right with your post about U.S. healthcare/insurance being SHAMEFUL. I can’t fathom how we Americans as a whole don’t see the benefit of free health coverage for all?! Every industrialized country in the entire world can pull it off except for US?!?! Ridiculous!
It’s like the way we spend more in health care costs than any other country in the world on pregnancy & maternal care, yet we are the only modernized country whose maternal death rate is skyrocketing instead of decreasing. Maybe it has something to do with how we reward our doctors monetarily to perform interventions & c-sections? (33% of all American births are c-sections while in Japan it’s 8%. Yet our babies are the same sizes.🤔) Or how we send moms home right after delivery & don't see them again/check on them again for 6 whole f-ing weeks after they just created a human being over the last 9 months?! OK, now my rant is over. I guess that was my UO for today.
@ttcbabyodo I'm sorry to hear of your brother's diagnosis and insurance issues. My mom has MS and was diagnosed at 24. She visits the MS clinic and they have provided her with meds at no cost when my parents divorced and she lost her insurance coverage. Is there a clinic near your brother? Alternatively, many pharma companies will directly help patients cover the costs if they have trouble. I hope he is able to get the meds he needs. Feel free to pm me if you have any questions or just want to chat ❤
Pink is my favorite color but hate pink Christmas decor... but I love glitter lol.
Me: 33 DH: 36 Dating 4/2008 Married 6/2016 TTC #1 9/2019 BFP 12/13/2019! EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
Re: UO Thursday 11/7
Why is it so hard to use gifs on the mobile app? Ugh.
TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016
Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss
Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
Baby #2 due June 12, 2018
Actually, I know you from TTCAL. Well, guess I should say my friend dpjennifer knew you. So, I'll join your ranting rage... I agree about the overly political correctness/politeness issue. A movie a certain segment of my friends really enjoys is "Blazing Saddles" so it comes up regularly that a movie like that could NEVER be made nowadays.
What kinda prompted the UO is I like to watch makeup videos on YouTube to unwind (there is something so fun about watching people play with makeup. Not sure what or why.) This one chick o was watching seemed nice enough and I had never seen anything political or whatever in her makeup reviews so perfect for just escaping the nonsense of the world. But on one of her videos someone started talking about how she lost a lot of subscribers when she got "canceled" and I was curious so I went Googling. Apparently in 2017 she tweeted something about how she loved seeing support for women in the comment section of her posts and even if we don't always agree it's great that people's opinions are being heard. Then she hashtagged it "#prolifefeminist" and people lost their minds. A lot of people started boycotting her and any makeup brand with whom she had ever collaborated over the tweet. And like, I guess I just don't understand how it was so wildly offensive that people who claimed to have been subscribers for years who apparently loved her just suddenly felt like she was the worst person ever and they couldn't follow her on Twitter or watch her YouTube content anymore. I finished catching up on all the drama and I was like "...what?" Apparently it's pretty common for brands to get "canceled" over tweets or posts on other social media. And while I am sure there are occasionally people/brands who do or say some truly terrible things where people shouldn't support them most of the examples I saw in some quick Googling just kinda seemed like things that had been massively blown out of proportion.
Like I'm all for holding people accountable for their actions. And I do believe that a little sensitivity goes a long way. But I don't know. I feel like cancel culture takes the good idea of holding people accountable and goes a little too far with it in many cases. It just feels a little too reactionary and a little too extreme for most things in life I guess. If Hitler had a makeup brand yes let's cancel it. If someone from a different religion or potical party or culture has a makeup brand let's just agree to disagree and go on with out lives.
I don't know if I'm even making sense. I kept having nightmares last night and got approximately no sleep so I'm a zombie today.
TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016
Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss
Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
Baby #2 due June 12, 2018
I'm always amazed how people's tunes can change just because they find out a fact about someone. Like they were totally cool being that person's friend without knowing that information and then they throw the friendship out the window like their entire friendship meant nothing.
TTC #1 since 7.2017
Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3 | all BFN
IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys
FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name"
RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET
FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer
2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle
Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks
TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20
Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21
Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation
Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal
Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations
BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy
DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023
Consultation with RI | 6.6.23
Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal
Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56
Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine
Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds
Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox
Repeat labs in 8 weeks
Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues
TTC put on pause
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
@tyrion_ I think that was well said
TTC #1 since 7.2017
Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3 | all BFN
IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys
FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name"
RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET
FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer
2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle
Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks
TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20
Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21
Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation
Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal
Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations
BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy
DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023
Consultation with RI | 6.6.23
Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal
Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56
Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine
Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds
Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox
Repeat labs in 8 weeks
Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues
TTC put on pause
That being said, I'm perfectly happy to quietly unfollow or walk away from someone who says something I find problematic or offensive. No need to be dramatic and tell the world I'm unfollowing. I used to follow a blogger back in the day (8 years ago!) who said some really awful weight-related stuff, and I just unsubscribed from her on every platform. No harm, no foul.
IVF Cycle #1 February 2020 4 embryos frozen, 1 fresh transfer = CP
FET #1 Natural Cycle March 2020 CXL'd due to Covid-19
FET #1 Natural Cycle June 2020 - CP #2
FET #2 Natural Cycle July 2020 - BFP!!!!!! Beta #1 = 273
June Signature Challenge - Favorite TV Quotes
@tyrion_ one example that comes to mind, and I will probably really be in the UO here but here we go - Women taking compliments the wrong way and getting way to sensitive then calling it harrassement. Don't get me wrong, I am all for women's rights, clearly, and I am all for the #metoo movement - but I think there are a lot of people out there that take offense and take it the wrong way when a man tells them they look really pretty today, or that they like their hair. My old boss would say to us sometimes "Is it okay if I tell you your hair looks really nice today? Is that allowed?"
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
I also agree that people tend to be over-sensitive. However, I understand that people are sensitive to the areas that hit home the hardest. For me, it's gays and disabled (my mom has MS). I also cringe anytime someone uses the "R" word to describe something that is silly/crazy/whatever. I'm not going to stop all contact with that person, but I will distance myself because IMO they not only sound ignorant, but extremely prejudice. And more often than not (in my experience) if I try to "educate" them, they would tell me I'm being oversensitive, so I don't bother.
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
TTC #1 since 7.2017
Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3 | all BFN
IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys
FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name"
RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET
FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer
2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle
Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks
TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20
Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21
Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation
Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal
Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations
BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy
DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023
Consultation with RI | 6.6.23
Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal
Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56
Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine
Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds
Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox
Repeat labs in 8 weeks
Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues
TTC put on pause
I also strongly disagree that people are “too sensitive” these days. Minorities and the oppressed are so often completely dismissed with the phrase “you’re too sensitive.” Take a moment to ask yourself WHY someone is taking something offensively. Ask yourself why you’re dismissing their feelings. If there’s a change you can make to be more inclusive, DO IT. So often the people making the accusation of oversensitivity are in a position of privilege. Don’t let your privilege blind you, even if you truly believe you’re coming from a good place.
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
Kinda wondering if maybe I should have gone with how playing Christmas music and decorating before it's even Thanksgiving is too soon. Ya know, a safe UO where I'm not spending my day worrying everyone thinks I'm a twatwaffle or something now.
@wishiwaspreggo sometimes people amaze me with their hypocrisy and how rude and judgemental they are. Because seriously who are you and your wife hurting by being together? No one. Literally no one. You're two consenting adults who love each other and you're happy. Who is your cousin hurting when he walks out on his family? His entire family. If he wants to judge anyone he needs to find a mirror and let himself have a piece of his mind. Otherwise he needs to keep his nonsense to himself because WTF dude? I'm sorry that your family treated you that way. Its unfair and horrible.
TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016
Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss
Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
Baby #2 due June 12, 2018
edit: atrocious spelling and grammar
TTC #1 since 7.2017
Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3 | all BFN
IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys
FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name"
RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET
FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer
2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle
Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks
TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20
Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21
Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation
Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal
Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations
BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy
DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023
Consultation with RI | 6.6.23
Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal
Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56
Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine
Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds
Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox
Repeat labs in 8 weeks
Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues
TTC put on pause
TTC #1 since 7.2017
Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3 | all BFN
IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys
FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name"
RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET
FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer
2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle
Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks
TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20
Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21
Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation
Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal
Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations
BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy
DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023
Consultation with RI | 6.6.23
Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal
Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56
Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine
Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds
Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox
Repeat labs in 8 weeks
Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues
TTC put on pause
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
I have another light UO. I don't like pink Christmas decorations.
@wishiwaspreggo You are my hero today.♥️♥️♥️♥️. I agree 1000% with everything you so passionately stated and, @kmalls, as someone who identifies as a person of color (but is often assumed to be white) it is a RELIEF to hear someone share a stance with me who may not share my background. People of color get.so.tired! of having to explain the concepts you stated so eloquently . ♥️♥️♥️♥️ Shoutouts to @tyrion & @ziggymama06 & @the_road_to_oz too. It takes courage to speak up the way you do and did today.
Thanks to everyone who posted & calmly contributed to this thoughtful conversation. Nice job, ladies. I’m proud of us today!
P.S. @kpearse99 I’m also a hardcore feminist 💯 and support the #metoo movement till every dirty dick goes down. Buuuut, like you, I do think there’s a culture of hyper-sensitivity to what is now being interpreted as “harassment”. Example: I was sitting next to a male co-worker having a good conversation. I gave him some news that shocked him. His reaction was to open his eyes wide and grab my leg like, “No way!” He immediately caught himself & pulled his hand away quick, as if he thought I’d report him. That’s sad. I could tell he had no ill intent whatsoever.
At the same time, I had a disgusting boss who thought he was slick & loved to bring up his love of the current political administration at every opportunity—which is just totally inappropriate for a work space. He was a bully & was always throwing micro-aggressions my way. One day I walked into his office to discuss something he’d done poorly & that I now needed to fix. Before I could open my mouth he said sleazily, “You really have great hair, you know that?” I stone-cold stared him down without responding & he took a gulp. His intent was definitely not innocent & that moment still creeps me out. These two experiences showed me that it can be hard to know when one should react and when it might be “over-reacting”. I guess my point is that even though I do think some people overreact, it’s not my place to judge because I’ve been in those micro-aggression situations & could feel that it was harassment even though it might look innocent to the next person, and in some situations where a guy got nervous that he’d crossed an extremely thin and unclear line that I wasn’t worried about at all. Just my two cents added to this interesting dialogue.
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
And as @the_road_to_oz mentioned, healthcare in this country is downright shameful. As a clinical mental health counselor, I hate having to tell potential clients that we don't accept their insurance plan, only to hear the sound of defeat in their voice before they hang up. I also have watched my brother's journey with MS (diagnosed in 2017, and he's only 30) and seeing him fight to get the infusions his body so badly needs. He cannot work because of his disorder, so he doesn't qualify for the type of medical insurance he needs for his disorder. It's ridiculous. I am watching my baby brother suffer and there isn't a thing I can do about it.
Due with baby #2: Feb 2022
@ttcbabyodo I am so sorry for your brother’s situation. That is so f-ing unfair. It is the same sad & frustrating story with Lyme disease treatment. It is absolutely horrifying what “healthcare” has become in this country from a business side of things.
@the_road_to_oz You are so right with your post about U.S. healthcare/insurance being SHAMEFUL. I can’t fathom how we Americans as a whole don’t see the benefit of free health coverage for all?! Every industrialized country in the entire world can pull it off except for US?!?! Ridiculous!
It’s like the way we spend more in health care costs than any other country in the world on pregnancy & maternal care, yet we are the only modernized country whose maternal death rate is skyrocketing instead of decreasing. Maybe it has something to do with how we reward our doctors monetarily to perform interventions & c-sections? (33% of all American births are c-sections while in Japan it’s 8%. Yet our babies are the same sizes.🤔) Or how we send moms home right after delivery & don't see them again/check on them again for 6 whole f-ing weeks after they just created a human being over the last 9 months?!
OK, now my rant is over. I guess that was my UO for today.
Pink is my favorite color but hate pink Christmas decor... but I love glitter lol.
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl