@tyrion_ this is a mystery to me too! Over all my 15 TTC cycles (***sob***) my LP has been between 8 and 13!!? I thought the LP length was supposed to be consistent, but not for me either!
I will be meeting with the RE next month and definitely will ask about the that...
@dumbledoredies I’m so sorry for your loss❤️ For tantrums, my DD is around the same age as your LO and I am usually able to distract her out of a tantrum. That is probably going to lose is effectiveness soon. And might not be the best habit? Curious to see the other input you get!
@dumbledoredies DS just turned 2 and his tantrum game is strong. I try hugs, distractions, ignoring some to see if he'll work through it. If it's a tantrum due to not wanting to leave somewhere, we say bye to things - "bye slide", "bye sandbox", etc.
@dumbledoredies Ugh tantrums. We do a few things. I'm trying to use the Positive Discipline principles, along with The Whole Brian Child. I try my best to approach it form a place of empathy ("You are very upset that we have to leave the park! Do you need a hug?" rather than invalidating his feelings or trying to reason with him. I also use redirection a lot. It doesn't always work and sometimes I yell. With safety things, there's less flexibility. He did that to me in a parking lot once, and so I carried him like a kicking and screaming surfboard back to the car. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
**TW**
Me: 35 | H: 40 Married Sept. 2013 DS1: Nov 11, 2016 MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d) CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d) BFP! 8/24/19 DS2: May 10, 2020
Thanks everyone! DD will be staying with my parents overnight while we get a hotel room and have a staycation. I’m definitely looking forward to it but I’m nervous.
@dumbledoredies DD is really getting into the tantrum phase. Again, it is over the silliest things! I love @shamrocandroll advice about empathy. I need to read that!
@dumbledoredies I have an incredibly strong willed and stubborn 3YO (and a compliant 20 month old). The best advice I have is to listen to Janet Lansbury's No Bad Kids podcasts.The short podcasts are great to listen to while running errands in the car or when you're taking a break. A lot of it is based on letting the kids have their emotions, but not letting it affect you negatively (WAY easier said than done). I listen to a new one every few weeks and it's a great reminder to realize a) you're SO not alone b) these tantrums and emotions are not only normal but a necessary part of development and c) you are the parent and you're there to support your child, not fix every problem they have because there will always be another problem, especially during a tantrum.
If you're interested I can look up a few good ones I've enjoyed specifically on tantrums. It really did change my mindset of how to react when it happens.
@millpe so glad you had a great and relaxing vacation! As for my test results - We have our consultation call on August 1st and it looks like the analysis is in progress so the results may get to my RE's office before we discuss them with the consult... so I'm actually a little confused with how it all works. I thought I would have had everything back this week so we could make our decision before next cycle, but AF is due to arrive early next week so I think we may be waiting a whole other cycle before we start with the IUI. Sigh.
@gingermama29 enjoy your vacation! Don't worry about checking in with us, you should enjoy your vacation time and be as unplugged as possible - you can always catch up with us later
@bows22 my friend! I love your positive vibes and wishful wishes Really pushing for that April BMB - keep it up!!
@dumbledoredies He sounds like he's really practicing his independence there! Have you tried giving him options? Like, when he didn't want to hold your hand you can give tell him that he can either hold your hand or hold onto the cart but that he had to hold onto something. That way you are still making sure he's safe, but he thinks that because "he made the choice" that it's on his terms.
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
@dumbledoredies My son is now 4 but I remember at that age he went from this cherub of a baby boy to a feral beast. 2-2.5 was bruuuuuutal. I was convinced there was something else going on. But I started reading positive parenting books (no bad kids, no drama discipline, whole brain child) and implemented those tactics. He responded so much better to those methods than timeouts, ignoring, etc. Yelling and isolation techniques escalated him to insane levels. Those books really helped.
@tyrion_ I heard on another board that sometimes ovulating more than 1 egg at a time can lengthen LP because of the extra progesterone. That woman who had that happening was AMA and I guess had been told that was most likely the case?
@bows22 I do use distractions sometimes but I try to avoid them because like you said I feel like that's a bad habit. My DH told me to turn the TV on for DS the other day when he was throwing a tantrum and I was like I'm not sure that's the best idea. I really want him to be able to work through his emotions rather then shutting them down or using a distraction to get his mind off of what's he's upset about. But then I'm like hmmm because I use distractions when I'm upset or sad lol. 🤷♀️
@mamaqdubu I love podcasts! I will 100% look that podcast up. Thank you for the suggestion!
@kpearse99 I didn't have a cart at the time but I really like the idea of letting him pick so he feels like he's making the decision. He is absolutely testing his independence and boundaries. I've actually had a lot of luck with getting him to do things if I tell him we can do x, y, or z after so I think if I gave him 2 options and let him pick that he would be way more open to doing what i want him to do.
@tyrion_ I'll check those books out. I'm 100% not a chill parent. I have to remind myself often that he is trying to figure life out and he isnt purposely being stubborn and annoying. But boy is it tough some days.
@newmomtx06 I believe DS was around 10 months old when we left him for the first time overnight. I stood up in a wedding out of state when he was 11 months old so we did a trial run with my parents so I could get used to it. Since then he's spent the night at my parents every few weeks and its amazing! Highly recommend lol
@flinstone-2 I have quite a bit of anxiety about my BFF getting knocked up. I'm worried if she tells me in person that I'm going to cry. And I'll be so happy for her but so freaking sad for myself. You arent alone in your feelings!
@flinstone-2 That’s awesome. I’ve heard it was a great time to go. My friend went on a kid-free trip that week a year or two ago and had a blast, but ours is definitely not kid-free. We’re going with my parents and my brother’s family (2 other kids along with DS).
@dumbledoredies I'm not the chillest of parents either, although I've come a long way, and what's helped was trying to see things from DS's eyes and how that age sees things. (Although I am very fortunate that DS has never really thrown a temper tantrum, not one I would classify as one anyway, with the exception of getting a hair cut when he was younger). Like, we got into an argument a few months back about how sea glass is made. He told me it was made one way and I told him another and he kept fighting me telling me I was wrong. I remembered reading somewhere that his age group doesn't understand how there can be more than one answer to a question. That helped me to take a step back and explain how we were both right, and then we googled it together. But it was trying for a little bit there!
I guess in the situation where you didn't have a cart with you at that time, explaining to him that to keep him safe he needed to hold your hand while you walked into the store, but that he could pick which hand he wanted to hold (going back to the options so that he thinks he's calling the shots). I always found that explaining to them why you want them to do something, instead of just telling them to do it, helps them rationalize it more.
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
@kpearse99@dumbledoredies Oooh, yes! Presenting a choice works great for us as well. No, cookies are not a choice for your snack. But would you like to have grapes or cherries?
**TW**
Me: 35 | H: 40 Married Sept. 2013 DS1: Nov 11, 2016 MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d) CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d) BFP! 8/24/19 DS2: May 10, 2020
Any thoughts about this cycle? Hopeful. We'll see.
Any questions? Not yet
Rant/Rave/Brag: So, we are working on "no hitting" - lots of conversations about "You hurt mommy when you hit. Please don't do that." His response lately is to insist he didn't hit me - I hit HIM. We don't spank, and he is the one hitting. He's three. Any thoughts? It's excellent in public (sarcasm font) when he is smacking me, I tell him to stop and he screams "STOP HITTING ME IT HURTS!" ... When I am decidedly NOT hitting him. So we are dealing with lying, on top of the hitting, and public mom-shaming. Fabulous. Thanks kid.
GTKY: Do you have a special nickname for your child(ren)? If so, what’s the story behind it? Mr. Mittens is the only nickname with a story - and it's just from him always looking confused at his mittens when he was teeny tiny.
@dumbledoredies My son is also incredibly willful. I try to remind myself that strong willed children become successful adults, but while we are arguing over "Not THAT yellow cup. The OTHER yellow cup." it's so so hard. Solidarity.
@whatsbumpinpumpkin you might consider trying a stick system of some sort - it can be used with consequences or rewards depending on what works best for your son (so it's versatile)!
What I mean is, as a consequence system, you identify the behavior or behaviors that need to be improved, like hitting, and everytime he hits you have HIM put a Popsicle stick in a jar. When he reaches the number you set (say 10 sticks or 5 sticks) he gets something taken away.
If rewards worked better for him (as they did with my son) each day that he goes without hitting he gets to put a Popsicle stick in the jar. When he gets 5 sticks he gets a reward.
My son needed help with manners/respect of others, listening ears, trying his best/behaving and we threw in 2 chores (feeding the dogs and picking up his toys). He got a stick for each one that he accomplished each day - so every day he could earn 5 sticks. And I set a goal of how many sticks to reach. For him, family time or mommy and me time is what did the trick, not really candy or a toy that he's wanted - he was all about doing stuff with me and MH, so his rewards were: Going to a fair, Going to the movies, Game Night, going to dinner...etc. It worked really really well for us, and after a few months we stopped all together. (I might end up going back to this for a few other things for a little bit)
Since your little guy is much younger than mine I would stick with one behavior, maybe two, that you want him to work on each day.
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
@dumbledoredies If there’s a scale from chill mom to the least amount of chill mom, I’m even further off to the side of least chill mom. My son rocked my whole soul with his strong will and stubbornness. I always thought I’d rule with an iron fist and “my way or the highway.” And then he basically gave me a proverbial middle finger and didn’t give one sh*t about how I wanted to parent. It’s hard. Sooooo hard. But once you find something that works (ish) it really helps.
@tyrion_ We had a color coded spreadsheet for our wedding. Synched to our phones. I am a financial advisor, and have worked for Goldman Sachs as a trader in NY. I don't DO chill.
@whatsbumpinpumpkin oh my goodness why are kids so evil hahaha. I’m laughing at the way you described the hitting thing but seriously poor you. I have no advice but I hope you have a way that you are able to alert everyone around you that you are in fact not hitting him. What a nightmare!
AFM I randomly ran into our favorite NICU nurse at a Panera today. It felt like such a time warp! She was seriously my best friend during that time and it was so nice to see her outside of the hospital. We made plans to get together so I’m really happy about that. The reason I’m mentioning this is because I’m crazy so I have convinced myself that it was some kind of sign from the universe. Which doesn’t really make sense but whatever keeps the positivity going right?
@tyrion_ I get so jealous of parents who are like yeah we use a chill parenting approach where we never yell and yada ya and I'm like ha. I'm a yeller. What can I say? It's not like I'm constantly yelling but when I've been standing on the stairs for 5 minutes and he still isnt going up I'll start yelling GO GO GO FREAKING GO UP THE STAIRS and he usually will go up the stairs. I found what works and its 100% not chill but it works in that situation. People might cringe at my parenting approach but DS is a happy little boy.
@bows22 how cool you reconnected with your favorite nurse! I would also take that as a sign, and also just be excited for girl friends and making plans. Positivity & keeping busy is sometimes the only thing you can do when things aren't in your control!
@dumbledoredies I wish I could find my inner voice and be more vocal with my children sometimes! I'm a fairly quiet person so it's out of my character to yell, but to my detriment because when my kids get on my nerves and don't listen I find it hard to not internalize it and let it eat at me and explode at DH later on in the day or something I didn't mean to do. Sometimes I'd rather just yell and release all of the frustration! DH on the other hand has to contain is voice a lot. Yesterday the kids were going nuts at bedtime and I heard him let out a huge loud sigh when they were playing around in the bathroom instead of brushing their teeth and getting dressed. DS1 turned to him and said "Daddy, daddy, don't you yell at me!!!! you're not nice!!"
@bows22 that's amazing that you got to reconnect with her! I bet it left a wonderfully positive warm and fuzzy feeling in your heart! And nothing wrong with looking and believing in signs... ** TW **
The week leading up to my last BFP (back in November that obviously didn't workout seeing as how I'm still here) I had so many signs! 2 of my friends had dreams that I was pregnant and driving home from work one night I was behind a car whose license plate said "ultrasnd" (or some spelling like that for Ultrasound). Then I had a really vivid dream and got my BFP the next morning. Crazy signs!
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
@bows22 No judgment here. I’m also looking at all the crazy signs. Like, last night I had a super vivid dream that I took a digital test that said “It’s a girl.” So, I’m taking that as a sign.
@mercury94 oooooo I would SO take that as a sign too!!! Although, they say your dreams usually mean the opposite - so that totally means you're actually KU with a boy!
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
@whatsbumpinpumpkin We have done time outs (Super Nanny style) and recently have started trying the 1-2-3 method used on the show Outdaughtered. If I can tell the hitting is completely with malice intent (she is mad at me and straight up looks at me and hits or kicks) she goes straight to timeout. It seems to work bit.
@bows22 Awww, that is awesome that you ran into the NICU nurse!
AFM... I had my follow up appointment with my functional medicine practitioner yesterday. Everything seems to be going well, I am going to finish out the supplements I am on (probably about 1.5 weeks left). One of these supplements is the reason why we were benched, since it shouldn't be taken while pregnant. His game plan for me is to finish this phase, start a detox (I think with food and maybe supplements) to rid my body of toxins for 20 days at the end of August, and then spend the next several months rebuilding my system and nutrients stores. So in his ideal (holistic minded) world I would be benched that entire time, but only really need to be benched for the current phase and the detox. I talked it over with DH and we decided to say whatever happens, happens for this cycle (O in the next day or so) and next cycle. If I get pregnant I will stop the supplements and skip the detox/rebuild phase and do all the work after pregnancy. If I am not pregnant I will go on with the detox and we will start actively trying when the detox is just about over (in 3 cycles from now).
We decided on this because everything just keeps getting pushed back more and more. We are now at the point where it will be a 3.5-4 year+ age gap, which is much more than we wanted. All of my health issues started after giving birth, which is why we've waited this long in the first place. So it is possible that I will get messed up after pregnancy again and all this work I've done will have to be done again. We will be done at 2, so DH suggested continuing this stuff after #2. I've healed so much in the last year and now I actually feel like myself again. So I feel like I am ready enough, if everyone waited until there body was "perfect" like my practitioner wants, no one would ever have kids.
@m6agua that plan seems to make the most sense. YH is right, why go through all of this to make yourself better just for the high chance of having to do it all over again after #2. It really warms my heart, though, to hear how much you have healed and that you are feeling like yourself again. As someone who has lost themselves and couldn't remember "who they were" (for different reasons than yours) re-discovering who you are and finally feeling like YOU again, is one of the best feelings. It's a struggle to get there sometimes, but when you do... man - it's a massive accomplishment. I hope that you are proud of yourself for getting there
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1: May 2011 BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12 DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018 Me: 36 | DH: 39 Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled 9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks 10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN 11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN 1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst 3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP 11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
@tyrion_@jennifer_louise Mine was “up” to 11 this cycle. Vitex, Vitamin C, progesterone, and B6 are supposed to help.
It's funny how it's the little things in life that mean the most...not where you live, or what you drive, or the price tag on your clothes... There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know! *ZBB*
I’m in such severe pain from my cramps that I called my husband. I need him to come home before I pass out. Thanks, body. I wasn’t sad enough not being KU. Now you’re trying to take me out.
Anyone else have fainting spells during their period? Just me? Yay.
@m6agua I'm so sorry for everything you're having to go through, but glad you have a game plan. I totally get that feeling of the age gap being more than I wanted, too. I can't believe our N16 babies will be 3 so soon.
@tyrion_ Ugh, I'm so sorry about the horrible cramps. AF is a bitch sometimes. Are you drinking enough water? Have you had your iron checked?
**TW**
Me: 35 | H: 40 Married Sept. 2013 DS1: Nov 11, 2016 MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d) CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d) BFP! 8/24/19 DS2: May 10, 2020
@shamrocandroll This has been a lifetime battle. I lose so much blood on day 1 that it bottoms me out. I can’t even count the times my mom or husband had to come get me from the work ER from fainting on my period. Only thing that helps is skipping periods on BC but can’t do that right now (for obvious reasons 😂).
@tyrion_ ugh that sounds so rough to lose that much blood that you're fainting! I'm so sorry! could you take iron supplements the days leading up to AF to try to curb it at all? I'm sure you've tried everything at this point!
@NYTino24 well I hope guess that's a good thing for you! I tried Vit B early on but now my LP seems longer without having to do anything... Waiting to see what the RE says about this.
@tyrion_ that's so scary! I sincerely hope stupid AF will GTFO asap and you can be free of her for 9mo++.
Re: TFAS w/o 7/22
I will be meeting with the RE next month and definitely will ask about the that...
@tyrion_ ugh I am sorry for the temp drop!
Fun fact: if I O same time as last cycle and get KU, I’ll be due on my son’s 5th birthday. Wooo boy.
@gingermama29 Enjoy your vacation!!!
(Jealous of everyone's vacations, haha!)
@dumbledoredies Ugh tantrums. We do a few things. I'm trying to use the Positive Discipline principles, along with The Whole Brian Child. I try my best to approach it form a place of empathy ("You are very upset that we have to leave the park! Do you need a hug?" rather than invalidating his feelings or trying to reason with him. I also use redirection a lot. It doesn't always work and sometimes I yell. With safety things, there's less flexibility. He did that to me in a parking lot once, and so I carried him like a kicking and screaming surfboard back to the car. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
@dumbledoredies DD is really getting into the tantrum phase. Again, it is over the silliest things! I love @shamrocandroll advice about empathy. I need to read that!
If you're interested I can look up a few good ones I've enjoyed specifically on tantrums. It really did change my mindset of how to react when it happens.
@millpe so glad you had a great and relaxing vacation! As for my test results - We have our consultation call on August 1st and it looks like the analysis is in progress so the results may get to my RE's office before we discuss them with the consult... so I'm actually a little confused with how it all works. I thought I would have had everything back this week so we could make our decision before next cycle, but AF is due to arrive early next week so I think we may be waiting a whole other cycle before we start with the IUI. Sigh.
@gingermama29 enjoy your vacation! Don't worry about checking in with us, you should enjoy your vacation time and be as unplugged as possible - you can always catch up with us later
@bows22 my friend! I love your positive vibes and wishful wishes Really pushing for that April BMB - keep it up!!
@dumbledoredies He sounds like he's really practicing his independence there! Have you tried giving him options? Like, when he didn't want to hold your hand you can give tell him that he can either hold your hand or hold onto the cart but that he had to hold onto something. That way you are still making sure he's safe, but he thinks that because "he made the choice" that it's on his terms.
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
@tyrion_ I heard on another board that sometimes ovulating more than 1 egg at a time can lengthen LP because of the extra progesterone. That woman who had that happening was AMA and I guess had been told that was most likely the case?
DS born 9.17
TFMR 10.19
@dumbledoredies Right there with you. I’m going to start trying to give him choices. I hope that helps.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Me 34 DH 34
PCOS
Baby number 2 due 4/11/20
@mamaqdubu I love podcasts! I will 100% look that podcast up. Thank you for the suggestion!
@kpearse99 I didn't have a cart at the time but I really like the idea of letting him pick so he feels like he's making the decision. He is absolutely testing his independence and boundaries. I've actually had a lot of luck with getting him to do things if I tell him we can do x, y, or z after so I think if I gave him 2 options and let him pick that he would be way more open to doing what i want him to do.
@tyrion_ I'll check those books out. I'm 100% not a chill parent. I have to remind myself often that he is trying to figure life out and he isnt purposely being stubborn and annoying. But boy is it tough some days.
DS born 9.17
TFMR 10.19
@flinstone-2 I have quite a bit of anxiety about my BFF getting knocked up. I'm worried if she tells me in person that I'm going to cry. And I'll be so happy for her but so freaking sad for myself. You arent alone in your feelings!
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Me 34 DH 34
PCOS
Baby number 2 due 4/11/20
I guess in the situation where you didn't have a cart with you at that time, explaining to him that to keep him safe he needed to hold your hand while you walked into the store, but that he could pick which hand he wanted to hold (going back to the options so that he thinks he's calling the shots). I always found that explaining to them why you want them to do something, instead of just telling them to do it, helps them rationalize it more.
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
Month/Cycle? Jan 2018
WTO/TWW? WTO
Ages of other child(ren)? Three
Any thoughts about this cycle? Hopeful. We'll see.
Any questions? Not yet
Rant/Rave/Brag: So, we are working on "no hitting" - lots of conversations about "You hurt mommy when you hit. Please don't do that." His response lately is to insist he didn't hit me - I hit HIM. We don't spank, and he is the one hitting. He's three. Any thoughts? It's excellent in public (sarcasm font) when he is smacking me, I tell him to stop and he screams "STOP HITTING ME IT HURTS!" ... When I am decidedly NOT hitting him.
So we are dealing with lying, on top of the hitting, and public mom-shaming. Fabulous. Thanks kid.
GTKY: Do you have a special nickname for your child(ren)? If so, what’s the story behind it? Mr. Mittens is the only nickname with a story - and it's just from him always looking confused at his mittens when he was teeny tiny.
@dumbledoredies My son is also incredibly willful. I try to remind myself that strong willed children become successful adults, but while we are arguing over "Not THAT yellow cup. The OTHER yellow cup." it's so so hard. Solidarity.
What I mean is, as a consequence system, you identify the behavior or behaviors that need to be improved, like hitting, and everytime he hits you have HIM put a Popsicle stick in a jar. When he reaches the number you set (say 10 sticks or 5 sticks) he gets something taken away.
If rewards worked better for him (as they did with my son) each day that he goes without hitting he gets to put a Popsicle stick in the jar. When he gets 5 sticks he gets a reward.
My son needed help with manners/respect of others, listening ears, trying his best/behaving and we threw in 2 chores (feeding the dogs and picking up his toys). He got a stick for each one that he accomplished each day - so every day he could earn 5 sticks. And I set a goal of how many sticks to reach. For him, family time or mommy and me time is what did the trick, not really candy or a toy that he's wanted - he was all about doing stuff with me and MH, so his rewards were: Going to a fair, Going to the movies, Game Night, going to dinner...etc. It worked really really well for us, and after a few months we stopped all together. (I might end up going back to this for a few other things for a little bit)
Since your little guy is much younger than mine I would stick with one behavior, maybe two, that you want him to work on each day.
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
Edit gif fail
AFM I randomly ran into our favorite NICU nurse at a Panera today. It felt like such a time warp! She was seriously my best friend during that time and it was so nice to see her outside of the hospital. We made plans to get together so I’m really happy about that. The reason I’m mentioning this is because I’m crazy so I have convinced myself that it was some kind of sign from the universe. Which doesn’t really make sense but whatever keeps the positivity going right?
I'm glad you reconnected with her. So cool.
@dumbledoredies I wish I could find my inner voice and be more vocal with my children sometimes! I'm a fairly quiet person so it's out of my character to yell, but to my detriment because when my kids get on my nerves and don't listen I find it hard to not internalize it and let it eat at me and explode at DH later on in the day or something I didn't mean to do. Sometimes I'd rather just yell and release all of the frustration!
DH on the other hand has to contain is voice a lot. Yesterday the kids were going nuts at bedtime and I heard him let out a huge loud sigh when they were playing around in the bathroom instead of brushing their teeth and getting dressed. DS1 turned to him and said "Daddy, daddy, don't you yell at me!!!! you're not nice!!"
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Me 34 DH 34
PCOS
Baby number 2 due 4/11/20
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
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Me 34 DH 34
PCOS
Baby number 2 due 4/11/20
@bows22 Awww, that is awesome that you ran into the NICU nurse!
AFM... I had my follow up appointment with my functional medicine practitioner yesterday. Everything seems to be going well, I am going to finish out the supplements I am on (probably about 1.5 weeks left). One of these supplements is the reason why we were benched, since it shouldn't be taken while pregnant. His game plan for me is to finish this phase, start a detox (I think with food and maybe supplements) to rid my body of toxins for 20 days at the end of August, and then spend the next several months rebuilding my system and nutrients stores. So in his ideal (holistic minded) world I would be benched that entire time, but only really need to be benched for the current phase and the detox. I talked it over with DH and we decided to say whatever happens, happens for this cycle (O in the next day or so) and next cycle. If I get pregnant I will stop the supplements and skip the detox/rebuild phase and do all the work after pregnancy. If I am not pregnant I will go on with the detox and we will start actively trying when the detox is just about over (in 3 cycles from now).
We decided on this because everything just keeps getting pushed back more and more. We are now at the point where it will be a 3.5-4 year+ age gap, which is much more than we wanted. All of my health issues started after giving birth, which is why we've waited this long in the first place. So it is possible that I will get messed up after pregnancy again and all this work I've done will have to be done again. We will be done at 2, so DH suggested continuing this stuff after #2. I've healed so much in the last year and now I actually feel like myself again. So I feel like I am ready enough, if everyone waited until there body was "perfect" like my practitioner wants, no one would ever have kids.
- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
TTC 9/2016 BFP 12/9/16 EDD 8/21/17 NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
TTC 2/2017 BFP 3/6/17 EDD 11/17/17 DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
TTC 12/2018 BFP 6/2/19 EDD 2/12/20 NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
TTC 7/2019 BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
TTC 8/19 IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20
AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
Anyone else have fainting spells during their period? Just me? Yay.
@tyrion_ Ugh, I'm so sorry about the horrible cramps. AF is a bitch sometimes. Are you drinking enough water? Have you had your iron checked?
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
Edit: spelling
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Me 34 DH 34
PCOS
Baby number 2 due 4/11/20
@tyrion_ that's so scary! I sincerely hope stupid AF will GTFO asap and you can be free of her for 9mo++.