1st Trimester
boymomaf
member
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I could just be overly stressed out...but I'm freaking out
boymomaf
member
Ok, a little background. A have 3 kids, all boys. Before my last son was born, I ended up having an ectopic and had my left tube removed. I am thinking I had the Ectopic because I got pregnant right after getting my Nexplanon taken out after 2 years of having it in. I got pregnant with my now 2 year old literally 2 weeks after having my tube removed. About a year ago I came off BC pills and started trying to conceive. By trying I mean all I really did was track my period and used the estimated ovulation day, and we weren't actually baby dancing on every O day. Well now I just got a positive pregnancy test. The first day of my last period was on the 11th of may and my normal cycle is usually 29/30 days. So I took a test on Thursday the 6th and it was faint AF, so I called my doc and had my blood drawn on Friday the 7th and the HCG was 46. They said congrats and wouldnt schedule me for another blood draw even though I've had an ectopic before. They just stressed that I need to pay attention and go to the ER if I have any of the symtoms that I did with my ectopic. So today is the 12 and I couldnt take the stress anymore, so I went to a clinic today and paid for another blood draw myself, and now I'm freaking the Eff out and I'm so nervous. I don't know if I can handle another loss. I'm so scared that I'm going to have another ectopic. I've taken sooooo many PT's that I'm going broke, but they are getting darker and darker. Anyone else experience this kind of stress and ectopic? I'm literally losing my mind. I'm so stressed that I'm just pissed off ALL the time.
Re: I could just be overly stressed out...but I'm freaking out
Unfortunately, you, nor any doctor, can control the uncontrollable. The most you can do is listen to your doctor, watch for signs, and hope for the best.
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I've never had an ectopic and realize it's probably terrifying to go through, but I have had 5 MCs with NO living children... and what you have to tell yourself is that YOU have no control over this situation except to be the healthiest you can be and to monitor your symptoms (or lack thereof) and to get your blood draws and ultrasounds. YOU have no control over whether you will have a healthy baby, a MC, or an ectopic PG. All you can do is realize that YOU are PG as of today and as of this moment, and to cherish that and any amount of time you get to spend with your baby, regardless of whether that is 2 days or 2 months or 20 years.
Just an FYI for the future/future PGs. You only have a few choices. You either appreciate and accept the children you already have and decide you cannot handle a possibility of loss/ectopic and stop TTC, you decide you can't handle the stress and decide to grow your family by either surrogacy/adoption/etc., or you accept the risk and attempt to bear another child with your body. But I'd highly recommend getting to a better place emotionally/physically before you try again.