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shamrocandroll
member
TTCAL w/o 2/25
shamrocandroll
member
I guess these are my threads to start now, hah. I'm running out of GTKY questions!!!
**This is a general trigger warning that CP, miscarriage/spontaneous abortion, selective abortion due to medical complications, and/or stillbirth may be mentioned.**
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc.
Status:
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R?
Any testing coming up/any recent results?
GTKY: Do you have any unusual or unconventional yearly traditions?
Me: 35 | H: 40
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
Re: TTCAL w/o 2/25
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. MMC 11/16 @ 10w, CP 2/3
Status: Benched/WFAF
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? We really enjoyed this cycle off of trying, and actually ended up doing it even more, because it was like the work part of it was taken away. TMI warning: the other day, I asked MH "Wow, you're frisky lately. What's gotten into you?" and he responded with "Technically, I'm getting into you."
Any testing coming up/any recent results? Nope
GTKY: Do you have any unusual or unconventional yearly traditions? Every year, on the first night we hear peepers outside, MH and I split a Maine Beer Co. Peeper Ale. It symbolizes the beginning of spring, and man am I aching for it right about now!!!
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. 15 week loss 12/18
Status: moving into the TWW soon.
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? I have been in my head this week. Contemplating different things. I need to get out of the house and get my mind off of everything.
Any testing coming up/any recent results? I'm still waiting for the same test results. I feel like I have been waiting forever.
GTKY: Do you have any unusual or unconventional yearly traditions? Nothing out of the ordinary here. I would like to start some new family traditions though.
@emeraldcity1214 Sorry you're too in your head right now. I'm sure the waiting doesn't help either. Hugs.
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. 3 MMC's and 2 CP's.
Status: Benched.
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? This is my last cycle being benched, so I'm really excited to get back in the game soon. I'll only have two cycles to get ku'd and have a baby while I'm still 38, so clearly that's not going to happen. I never thought I'd be trying to have a baby at 39.
Any testing coming up/any recent results? I have my last hCG test in Thursday and I'm expecting it to be zero.
GTKY: Do you have any unusual or unconventional yearly traditions? We are all about goofy traditions. We eat Chinese takeout every valentine's day, go to Disneyland in October, and we watch the Twilight Zone marathon and drink champagne on NY Day, to name just a few.
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc.
MMC & MC both in 2012, Stillbirth 1/26/18 at 23w due to genetic abnormalities (x-linked genetic mutation discovered)
Status: TWW
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R?
I’m pretty good. I had a physical today with my family doc and she said I’m in perfect health from her perspective. It was nice to hear her say “I hope the next time I see you is to confirm a pregnancy”.
Any testing coming up/any recent results?
Not planning to test this month, will wait for AF.
GTKY: Do you have any unusual or unconventional yearly traditions
We have family traditions for specific holidays like Christmas/Thanksgiving etc. Other than that I would say going to the rodeo, our city hosts a huge festival/fair around it in the summer. DH and I go to the chuck wagon races every year.
@shamrocandroll It’s awesome to hear that you and your H are making the most of your “time on the bench”!
@emeraldcity1214 Hope you can find a distraction!
@ruby696 I love your traditions!
@emeraldcity1214 i like the idea of walking around the parks when they are empty! do you know about the wizard of oz park that is abandoned? like where they filmed it or something? i’ve always wanted to go to that, but that is more like ruins than just an empty amusement park. maybe it used to be an amusement park? hm.
@shamrocandroll i’m with everyone above— glad to hear you’re doing it, doing it, doing it right.
@ruby696 it’s... i want to say funny but that’s not the right word? but it’s funny to read about how we all have these, like, goals before we turn a certain age. we all do it, but it just sucks so much when we miss our deadlines. i hate the stigma around age and ttc too because no matter what you read about the chances being good once you hit 35 you can’t forget that you’re 35 and then every hear after feels like ahhhh even though the numbers are on our side for a good while.
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. CP 10/18; MMC w/ D&C 2/19
Status: benched / probably wto still?
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? hiiii okay a lot i’m sorry but i missed y’all & i’ll try to keep it relevant-ish: i am at the miami airport back in the US after my post-loss vacay to Jamaica, where we didn’t have wifi/phone access from Thurs. til... well, now, really. I am super glad we went but also super glad to be going home and to be back HERE with y’all. I tried to normalize the conversation around my recent loss while I was there, talking about it with my Mom and bro at times bc they both knew (bc we cancelled and then rebooked the vacay). My mom stayed with this herbalist down there before she met up with us (she was there longer and has stayed w/ these ppl before) who gave her the name of this tonic and all these instructions that she said might help me, which I actually thought was sweet. she told my mom about her experience with loss, which i also appreciated. We stayed elsewhere tho so i didn’t get to meet those peeps just the story and tonic name from my mom. I also read a good chunk of a book on mc (and rpl) that arrived just in time before we left called NOT BROKEN that if anyone wants a brief (lol at myself thinking i can be brief) review of i’m happy to share my thoughts! books are helpful to me, personally.
Any testing coming up/any recent results? n/a
GTKY: Do you have any unusual or unconventional yearly traditions? we live in Louisiana now sooo... Mardi Gras! Which is nottthiinnggg like it’s depicted in pop culture and really different depending on which parade/event you go to when/where in the state etc. it’s coming ul next week!!
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. MMC 3/2016, CP 1/2019
Status: TWW
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? I went to my first therapy session with my work's EAP today. It was weird basically spilling my guts out and crying in front of a complete stranger but felt good to have someone to listen to me that isn't biased or judging. She made me feel like all my feelings I have about my losses are valid. I told her I would see how I am feeling in the next couple months in regards to TTCAL or possibly being PGAL and see if I need another session. I only get 5 sessions a year so need to make them count!
Any testing coming up/any recent results? Deciding if I want to test early or wait for AF- Having the CP makes me wish I never tested but is it better to know about the loss or have ignorant bliss?
GTKY: Do you have any unusual or unconventional yearly traditions? Every June my hometown has a Greek Festival- Greek Food, music/dancing. I've been going with my friends almost every year since high school. Just funny because hardly anyone there is actually Greek but just a good excuse to have fun and drink!
@kagesstarshroom Going to New Orleans was one of my favorite trips we ever went on- I hope to go back to Louisiana again one day!
@emeraldcity1214 I am sorry your test results aren't back yet- I hope they arrive soon.
@doraleigh35 I am happy your doctor was able to make you feel positive about your health and possibility of having a successful pregnancy in the future.
@ruby696 Yay for getting off the bench!
ETA: Words
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: 2 losses, MMC @ 8wks 8/2018 & MMC/D&C @ 9wks 2/2019
Status: benched
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? Finally stopped bleeding from my D&C so that's great. Also booked our trip to Paris this weekend. So excited to go. We need a break after all we've been through.
Any testing coming up/any recent results? Waiting on blood tests.
GTKY: Do you have any unusual or unconventional yearly traditions? Every year after Xmas we take a short a trip to Las Vegas. I shop at the outlets for after Xmas sales and then we gamble and eat up.
@kagesstarshroom great to hear you enjoyed your vacay. Let me know how you liked the book. I've been looking for books to read. I got one titled "Trying Again: A guide to pregnancy after loss" but haven't started reading yet. Too much schoolwork getting in the way.
@spartanrd4 glad to hear your session went well. I'm waiting on my referral to get my sessions started. Hoping it helps.
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? I am not in a good headspace right now and my work is shit. I've come to the conclusion that there are people in your life who may be tolerant of your situation (that may not be toxic) and supportive ones. My supervisor and boss are definitely just tolerant. Yesterday was my first day at work and it was tough and they didn't really give a shit. I've been off for a week since surgery and they didn't ask how I was or if I needed anything. They will do things like let me have a chair because I have a dr note (I stand at my desk) but they will leave it up to me to find it. It's simple, stupid petty stuff that just adds up to an environment that doesn't make me want to come to work. TW: LC
@dolewhipper I am sorry that you aren't getting support from people at work- when I talked to the counselor yesterday, that was one of the things we talked about was how difficult it is that people don't understand your feelings and sometimes it is hard because they are toxic or they just don't know the right things to say or do. Its difficult to understand someone's situation until you are in it. My DH is away from work a lot too so I know how you feel about not having help. I hope things get better soon- what I learned is you just have to take things one day at a time.
I feel super late to the thread, but I’ll try my best to catch up.
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. 6 losses. 12/13, 1/17,11/17, 4/18, 9/18, 2/19
Status: wto but I don’t think we are putting in the effort this cycle.
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? Just came back from our trip and idk if we are getting sick or if all the pollen down south is affecting us. Regardless, I sound like a man lol. It was nice to get away and clear my head though. The losses are becoming routine at this point, as weird as that sounds.
Any testing coming up/any recent results? Appt with RE in March. She’s got a long list to go through and lots of questions to answer.
GTKY: Do you have any unusual or unconventional yearly traditions? In the fall I drag dh to all the craft festivals. I love all the handmade goods. I also grew up in the fife and drum community and prime time for that is in the summer. It’s big in the northeast (where I’m originally from) so we try to get up there for it if we can.
@emeraldcity1214 I can’t believe you’re still eating for this results. Let’s hope they come in soon and you’re able to get some answers.
@ruby696 so happy you’re getting off the bench soon! I’ve always wanted to go to Disney around Halloween!
@kagesstarshroom I’m so glad you had a nice trip! So nice of your mom to do that. I hope talking about it with your family helped some.
@Spartanrd4 so glad you decided to go to the therapist! I loved being able to talk to a third party about my loss situation and not get the same responses that I would from my friends or family.
@maserrano714 Paris! How exciting! When do you go?
@dolewhipper I’m so sorry you are having a tough time at work. That was my biggest hurdle mentally after my first loss. I agree with spartan about just taking it one day at a time.
@kbrown2385 I just want to give you a hug right now. 6 losses is a lot and I'm so sorry that they feel routine.
@kbrown2385 we go to Paris May 5-May 11. We'll be celebrating our 21st anniversary from when we first met. It's a nice way to stop thinking of all these losses and TTC and clear my head just like you said about your trip. I hope you feel better and it's just allergies and you're not getting sick.
@maserrano714 I hope you have a wonderful
time! We are hoping to do a trip to Europe for our 10 year wedding anniversary. Paris is definitely on our list of places to go.
@dolewhipper I'm sorry you're having a hard time at work. I hope it gets easier for you soon. Re: hcg testing - I never had betas tested before this loss and it was always fine. This time, I called my doctor after I got a positive hpt 6ish weeks post loss while benched. If you're not benched and will be trying right away, you may want to check with your doctor so you don't risk a false positive.
@kbrown2385 I hope your RE appointment gives you some reassurance. Mine gave me enough hope to try for a few more cycles.
@ruby696 I hope you're pleasantly surprised by how quickly it happens after coming off the bench. We also only get 2 cycles off the bench before MH turns 39. I know it's not exactly the same, but we always planned on being done before he turns 40 and it's really hard to not have things go the way you imagined.
@doraleigh35 The rodeo must be fun! I've never been to one.
@kagesstarshroom I'm glad you got some things to try! I'm interested in hearing about the book if you wanna PM me about it! Also, Mardi Gras is on my bucket list!
@Spartanrd4 Glad you're finding therapy helpful! I struggle with the test/not to test dilemma myself after my last CP. It was so hard to go from pregnant to loss within 3 days. But then not knowing would be hard for me, too.
@maserrano714 Oh my gosh, have so much fun in Paris!!! Glad you get to start focusing on some positive!
@dolewhipper I am so sorry your work environment isn't supportive. That must make an already difficult situation so much more difficult. Do you guys have any therapy resources made available to you through work? I've been debating contacting ours, but I haven't yet. I don't have an answer about hcg, but hope you get an answer on that soon. Your family tradition sounds so cool!
@kbrown2385 Big hugs. That's just so much loss, and it breaks my heart that it's become routine. I hope you can get good answers and a good plan from your RE.
Also, wanted to add that I told my parents about my losses. I did it via text after totally failing at trying to tell them in person 2 weekends in a row. I feel like a little bit of a chicken sh*t, but they understood. They asked if I wanted to talk about it, and I said no, which I don't really with them because I don't think they'll totally get it and I feel like it's just a recipe for them saying something they shouldn't and me getting upset about it. But it's out there and it feels good to have it off my shoulders. I see them for the first time this weekend and we'll see how it goes, I guess. We don't ever plan on telling my ILs.
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
@emeraldcity1214 I'm sorry that you're still waiting on test results. How can it take so long?!
@shamrocandroll Mmm, ale! Good for you for telling your parents, even if it was via text. I still haven't told my mom about any of my losses...mainly because I don't want to talk about it, and she would ask too many questions and not let it go.
@ruby696 Fx for zero HCG! I love how many traditions you guys have! I really need to get on starting more of them... I always have so many ideas and then don't execute on them.
@doraleigh35 It's always nice to get a clean bill of health. Hopefully you'll see your doc soon again for confirmation
@kagesstarstorm Sounds like you had a great vacation and were able to talk to your family comfortably about loss. Super cute that your mom got some info on a tonic for you!
@spartanrd4 Super jealous of the Greek festival, yummy! I totally agree about therapy. I only went a couple of times, but being able to unload and say whatever you want to an unbiased person is very helpful (for some people).
@maserrano714 Paris, fun! It's so nice having something to look forward to. We just booked our summer trip to Denmark, but we're visiting my inlaws, so it's a bit different
@dolewhipper Ugh, I want to smack the people you work with. I'm sorry you're dealing with such insensitive and indifferent people. As for the HCG issue; I had a D&E, and the only reason I had my HCG tested at six weeks is because we want to do another IVF cycle. My doctors said that otherwise, as long as AF came back within six weeks, there wasn't a need to test. Maybe your circumstance is different, and there are reasons for HCG not to drop, but that was my experience (twice actually).
@kbrown2385 Sounds like you had a good trip, but sorry you're not feeling great.
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. Four losses since November 2017, most recently at 16 weeks last month.
Status: TWW (I think). My temps are all over the place, so relying on OPKs.
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? Some days I'm still having a hard time accepting our most recent loss. I'm "excited" to be signed up for another round of IVF, but also feeling pretty pessimistic about the results. I'm 41, I didn't expect to be still trying....
Any testing coming up/any recent results? Saline u/s showed no scarring, but AFC was low so that was depressing.
GTKY: Do you have any unusual or unconventional yearly traditions? Nothing unusual really, I guess we're pretty boring! DH is Danish, so we have a couple of things we do around Christmas, but we're not the only ones doing them
Take out Indian food on NYE has been a "habit" for the last few years....
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc.
Hi everyone. First time poster in this group. Yesterday I was looking forward to my first appointment. Tonight I’m here. Tomorrow I get to cancel that first appointment.
Status: Waiting for MC to end. Want to get back at it right away. Will start temping once it has ended.
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? Struggling with all the things. Nothing gone well. I guess I’m thankful it happened so early, and on its own. My first appointment was to be 3 days before my bday. Glass half full, at least I didn’t find out at the appointment. Happy birthday. Also glass half full, at least I know we can get pregnant. But we hadn’t told anyone so I have nobody to talk to. Quite literally, since H has been at work before it all started yesterday and I won’t see him until tomorrow evening. Just me and the dogs. Also thankful I have a big project at work to use as an excuse to keep my door closed. Also impressed with how far pads have come in the nearly 20 years since I last used them. 😂 Unimpressed with seeing everyone and their mother at Target when I went to buy them! Really?!?! Sigh. So many thoughts and emotions right now.
Any testing coming up/any recent results? Nope
GTKY: Do you have any unusual or unconventional yearly traditions? Yes! Christmas Vacation must be watched repeatedly in the week leading up to Christmas! And every year we go to the Fort Worth Stock Show and Rodeo, where one of the booths there every year sells dog treats. Every year we get a happy meal for the doggos. 🐶 You can choose between a “cheeseburger” or “hot dog” and it comes with “fries”. And you can make it giant sized. Those are two that quickly come to mind. 🙂
While I am not happy to be part of the group, I do look forward to getting to know you ladies!
Hey friends. I’m not sure where or if I’m supposed to reintroduce myself somewhere on TB. I took a month off and feel most comfortable here in this thread for my first post back. Will add tags later—both comforted to see familiar faces and very sad at the same time, of course. Sorry to the new names I see here and for your losses. This is hard stuff.
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: A late loss at 18 weeks in 10/18. An early loss in 1/19. Thankfully, none of my medical team called it a chemical so I haven’t either.
Status: Waiting for the Fertile Week
How are things going? TheBump acted up for me for the last month so I could lurk but couldn’t “like” or “reply” to anything. It seems to have been a good thing to take a break & stop obsessing. Just got new test results indicating what may be another problem, but also new meds so hopeful that the next time will be successful.
Any testing coming up/any recent results? Recently learned that my ANA titers are borderline positive; this makes sense since I felt in my October loss/pregnancy that my body was attacking it. Confirmation feels good, somehow.
GTKY: Do you have any unusual or unconventional yearly traditions? It’s always warm here so the whole huge extended family goes to the beach after opening presents on Christmas Day. It’s a lovely way to spend family time together.
@keikilove I'm so sorry to see you back here! You were just leaving when I was new, but we interacted a little bit. So sorry about your losses. My OB referred to it as an early loss as well, which I was thankful for. Big hugs!
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
@keikilove so sorry for your loss and sorry you're back here. Sending you hugs.
@keikilove Sending hugs your way
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc.
~mmc/D&C 9/28/18; mmc- cytotec 2/9/19
Status: benched & waiting
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R?
~Hi ladies. I am also feeling a bit late to the thread this week. I have been feeling a little under the weather physically, emotionally, mentally....We had our first appointment with the reproductive endocrinologist last Friday. I was very happy with the doctor. He was amazing & honest about everything. I have to go get one more hcg test today & expect to be at zero. Then the RE will begin a complete blood workup. He said he doesn't technically consider me a fertility "issue" because I am getting pregnant; for lack of a better term, he said unfortunately at my age risk of miscarriage is higher & it is just "bad luck" to have chromosomal abnormalities. So, we are thinking we are going to try one more time. He is going to start me on vaginal progesterone after the blood tests come back. I am guessing I am going to cycle here soon, so I am trying to get in for all my bloodwork before my next ovulation. He said he would treat me as high risk; hcg tests every 2-3 days, u/s weeks 5,7,9...etc. OR we can try IVF & pick only the "healthy" eggs to reduce risk of chromosomal abnormalities. That, however, is not covered by insurance. So, my public school teacher salary is not happy about that. But honestly, I really am thinking that this might be a good option.
Any testing coming up/any recent results? hcg today
GTKY: Do you have any unusual or unconventional yearly traditions? Not really :-/
~Sorry for the long post. I got all emotional thinking about this. I will be back to revisit the thread & for tags. I must scatter off to get my 3rd graders from gym! AAHHHHH
@_khaleesi Welcome to the group, although I'm sorry you find yourself here. I am so sorry for your loss.
@shamrocandroll Hot Tip: Mardi Gras is a whole season, and it is easier to come down before actual "Fat Tuesday"-- like, cheaper to fly/book a place in Nola If you don't mind walking (which is half the fun for me, just being IN the city) you can stay in the Bywater (like at an airbnb) which is a nice walk to the quarter/Bourbon Street, or over by the stadium. (Stay in the Quarter is $$$$). We did that two years ago for the Thursday-Sunday before actual Mardi Gras day and it..... was epic. Also, the whole state does parades, too, and different things to celebrate. We did "Cajun Mardi Gras" or "Courier de Mardi Gras" last year while was.... very rural and VERY epic and amazing. Anthony Bourdain did one last year too (rest in peace)--there are two big ones, and he did the other one, the one we didn't do. Oooo i am full of Mardi Gras advice/suggestions i will stoppp. 💜💛💚
@maserrano714 I read a gooood chunk of Trying Again right after my loss. I really like Not Broken and would recommend it for sure. It is concise and well organized and I feel like i am getting a LOT of information in an easy to digest way that makes me feel hopeful and informed.
.
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020