I forgot to do any formal style check in last time, so I took this format from the September 2019 BMB.
This check-in will be posted every Monday. Welcome all new members. No TW needed here for loss discussions, but please use a TW to discuss living children.
How far along are you/EDD?
Current mood?
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable.
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs?
Rants/Raves/Dear Diary?
GTKY: What’s your favorite movie (or movies if you are like me and can’t pick one lol)
TW: MMC
BFP1 12/24/14 - EDD 09/07/15 (D/C 8w1d)
BFP2 6/12/15 - EDD 2/22/16 (D/C 10w3d)
———
Diagnoses and Treatments
PCOS (myo-inositol, excercize)
Indeterminant levels of APS IgM antibodies (baby aspirin)
Sub-septate uterus (hysteroscopic septoplasty 12/18/15)
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BFP3 05/02/16 EDD 01/09/17 DS born 01/05/17
BFP4 01/28/19 EDD 10/?/19 🤞🙏
Re: PGAL (pregnant after loss) check in 2/18/19
How far along are you/EDD? 7w+/Oct 3
Current mood? Exhausted. Stupid cold. I broke out in a full blow sweat last night from breaking a probable low grade fever, which of course put full blown PgAL brain in effect even though I *know* low grade fevers are totally normal when linked to colds
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable.
*TW LC mentioned* MC before DS1. CP late December 2018.
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs? MW official intake on Thursday. I should walk out with a MFM referral after that (I’m homozygous MTHFR with some clotting protein deficiencies which sticks me in the high risk category)
Rants/Raves/Dear Diary? it’s a mix of all three- I’m counting down the days until next week when I can break out the doppler. I’ll feel better about things after that, I hope
GTKY: What’s your favorite movie (or movies if you are like me and can’t pick one lol)
Ah man, it’s been so long since we’ve watched a real movie 😪
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BFP #2 5/4/14, EDD 1/15/15, DS1 1/19/15
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@cmbt2 what type of doppler do you have? I'm planning to get one once I know things are going well and I can safely use it at home.
How far along are you/EDD? 4+5 / Oct 23
Current mood? Oddly okay /calm....
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable. 2018 brought 3 losses my way. A MMC in Feb, CP in Sept, and a MMC in Oct
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs? The anniversary of my first loss is the 28th. I think I'm going to be okay, but perhaps a little sad when I look at the "what ifs" and "should haves". I think re:my CP I've made it. My betas had a 32 hr doubling time so that was great peace of mind there. My biggest milestone is going to be seeing proper growth at my 7wk US. That's the point where things keep going wrong. Both of my MMCs stopped growing at 6+5 and we had already confirmed HB on the 2nd (but measuring 10 days behind).
Rants/Raves/Dear Diary? It's still snowing. My dad didn't plow our driveway last storm and after a few days and driving on it, it's basically all ice. Now it can't be plowed. I'd fire him but then I'd have to find someone and legit pay them..... 😂
GTKY: What’s your favorite movie (or movies if you are like me and can’t pick one lol) I don't have a favorite. I can watch cheesy rom coms repeatedly though.
@prpl11butterfly - I have a sonoline B doppler. Best $40 I ever spent.
How far along are you/EDD? 6ish weeks
Current mood? This weekend was really tough for generalized anxiety. Being too tired to exercise is taking its toll.
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable.
TW living child
I had two MMC 6 months to the day apart in 2015 before having my son in 2017. One (blighted ovum) was diagnosed at 8 weeks. The second was diagnosed at 8 weeks but it stopped growing at 6w1d and we never saw a heartbeat. I waited two weeks to pass it, but I gave up and had a D&C somewhere around 10w3d by LMP.
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs? I got my BFP this time just after the anniversary of loss two. We saw a yolk sac on ultrasound so I have passed the blighted ovum risk, but I am currently right around when things stopped growing with my second loss.
Rants/Raves/Dear Diary?
GTKY: What’s your favorite movie (or movies if you are like me and can’t pick one lol)
I love musicals (Rent, Les mis, Singing in the Rain) and typical super hero movies (X-men, Avengers, etc).
BFP1 12/24/14 - EDD 09/07/15 (D/C 8w1d)
BFP2 6/12/15 - EDD 2/22/16 (D/C 10w3d)
———
Diagnoses and Treatments
PCOS (myo-inositol, excercize)
Indeterminant levels of APS IgM antibodies (baby aspirin)
Sub-septate uterus (hysteroscopic septoplasty 12/18/15)
———
BFP3 05/02/16 EDD 01/09/17 DS born 01/05/17
BFP4 01/28/19 EDD 10/?/19 🤞🙏
How far along are you/EDD? 6w4d
Current mood? Blah
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable. Natural MC in April 2015. Led to discovering a large cyst, surgery to remove the cyst along with the damaged ovary and tube and an endometriosis diagnosis.
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs? First appointment is 2/25 no betas this time or anything extra...which feels weird. I'm not allowing myself to really get attached to the idea of this being real, but I'm relatively calm about it.
Rants/Raves/Dear Diary? Non pregnancy related, but February is a hard month. My dad passed away 11 years ago on 2/5 and his birthday is 2/18. I always get a little down during this month. We were very close and it just sucks so much.
GTKY: What’s your favorite movie (or movies if you are like me and can’t pick one lol) I don't have an all time favorite. I like a lot of different genres and can't commit.
BFP1 12/24/14 - EDD 09/07/15 (D/C 8w1d)
BFP2 6/12/15 - EDD 2/22/16 (D/C 10w3d)
———
Diagnoses and Treatments
PCOS (myo-inositol, excercize)
Indeterminant levels of APS IgM antibodies (baby aspirin)
Sub-septate uterus (hysteroscopic septoplasty 12/18/15)
———
BFP3 05/02/16 EDD 01/09/17 DS born 01/05/17
BFP4 01/28/19 EDD 10/?/19 🤞🙏
How far along are you/EDD? 6+3/Oct 11
Current mood? Tired and lazy
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable. I had a MMC in Nov ‘17. Started spotting at 11 1/2 weeks and confirmed by ultrasound the next day that the baby had stopped developing at 8 weeks.
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs? We have an ultrasound on Friday. Seeing a heartbeat will help but we did see one with my MC so it won’t alleviate all worries.
Rants/Raves/Dear Diary? I’m so thankful to DH for not saying a word at all the takeout we’ve been eating or my lack of housework, but wish he’d help a bit more 😬 I feel bad complaining though because he’s been awesome
GTKY: What’s your favorite movie (or movies if you are like me and can’t pick one lol) All time favorites...That Thing You Do, You’ve Got Mail, The Holiday, Amelie, Almost Famous
@kfarr26 I’m sorry February is rough. I have hugs.
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BFP #2 5/4/14, EDD 1/15/15, DS1 1/19/15
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How far along are you/EDD? 7 + 5 days/ Oct 2
Current mood? Anxious AF
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable. After TTC for 2 years for our first and one year of IUI/IVF, we got pregnant last July. At my first ultrasound at 7 weeks, the heart beat was slow and baby measuring behind. 4 days later there was no growth and we prepared for MC.
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs? My first ultrasound is tomorrow. I have some PTSD from just seeing the look on the ultrasound techs face from last time. My original EDD was early April so I think I will be ok when that date rolls around as long as this pregnancy sticks
Rants/Raves/Dear Diary? Anyone else lagging in the way of symptoms? I’ve been exhausted, increase appetite, and burping a ton.. but no morning sickness, boobs not really sore anymore.
GTKY: What’s your favorite movie (or movies if you are like me and can’t pick one lol): I love horror movies and cheesy rom coms. Also comedies, ok I think I like all movies .. although my husband always gives me crap for falling asleep during them lol
BFP1 12/24/14 - EDD 09/07/15 (D/C 8w1d)
BFP2 6/12/15 - EDD 2/22/16 (D/C 10w3d)
———
Diagnoses and Treatments
PCOS (myo-inositol, excercize)
Indeterminant levels of APS IgM antibodies (baby aspirin)
Sub-septate uterus (hysteroscopic septoplasty 12/18/15)
———
BFP3 05/02/16 EDD 01/09/17 DS born 01/05/17
BFP4 01/28/19 EDD 10/?/19 🤞🙏
@leilee101 I hope you have a good appointment tomorrow. As far as symptoms mine come and go, being worse in the evening, but it's really messing with my PGAL brain.
How far along are you/EDD? 5+5/Oct 16
Current mood? Depends on the moment honestly, I'm all over the place
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable.
2 early losses 8/17, 1/18 followed by 9 months of TTC
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs? I have an U/S on Thursday, I know seeing a HB doesn't guarantee anything but both my losses were preHB so i'm hoping it will alleviate some anxiety.
Rants/Raves/Dear Diary? I wish I could stop symptom spotting. ***TMI*** This morning I had a horrible constipation issue but then I have had 4 diarrhea spells today. This ramped up my symptom spotting because I remember very clearly have severe diarrhea with my losses. Now Dr. Google says there is a correlation but not enough to associate the two together and that it's likely from the increase in progesterone. Doesn't help my brain though when my boobs are pretty normal today.
GTKY: What’s your favorite movie (or movies if you are like me and can’t pick one lol) Can't say it really depends on my mood. I never tire of Dirty Dancing, How To Lose a Guy In 10 Days, Selena or Disney and Pixar movies though
HX
DSD: 17
DS: 4(Nov'14)
MMC:8/17
MMC: 1/18
BFP: 2/7/19 EDD:10/16/19
Tickers
How far along are you/EDD? 6ish?
Current mood? Anxious and on edge AF. At our 6w u/s on Friday, there was sac, but no heartbeat. RE said I am likely behind their projection and this week's u/s will be more telling. "Cautious optimism" is what she said.
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable. TW: DD 07/2013. She took almost a full year to conceive. MC at 5w 04/2015. And then a whole journey until now.
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs? U/s on Friday. I'm really hoping we see a heartbeat. If not, my RE said to prepare for m/c.
Rants/Raves/Dear Diary? I currently have a BV infection, so discharge freaks me out. Symptoms wise I am SO TIRED. Like fatigue will hit me out of nowhere. I also feel bloated all the time, like it's my new normal.
GTKY: What’s your favorite movie (or movies if you are like me and can’t pick one lol) . Oceans 11 (my fav) - 13. Love Actually.
@christis8 I absolutely refuse to have an ultrasound before 7 weeks because there it's often just too early for the heart to start and I know I would just stress myself out. Fingers crossed that everything looks perfect Friday
How far along are you/EDD? Due October 13
Current mood? Optimistic today
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable. I have two children (now are 5 and almost 7) and we have been trying for over 2 years to have a third child. I have had two missed miscarriages (blighted ovums discovered at 8 week sonogram) as well as a miscarriage where embryo stopped growing at 6 weeks (never saw heartbeat). All these times my numbers were perfect and normal. I passed all the miscarriages naturally at the time and really not wanting to do that again!
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs? I had my first sonogram appointment today and we saw a heartbeat so I actually will now say I am pregnant. A positive pregnancy test for me means little since I had been there so many times with no results, so to see the embryo and hear a heartbeat today was very exciting!
Rants/Raves/Dear Diary? Just nervous for everything. My kids are older than we thought they would be with the third, I am older, just feeling older!!! A lot to be anxious about.
GTKY: What’s your favorite movie (or movies if you are like me and can’t pick one lol) Good Will Hunting
How far along are you/EDD? 7w 2d
Current mood? Nervous
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable. I have 2 beautiful boys and had a miscarriage this past November, very early, just shy of 6w.
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs? Had an ultrasound this morning...saw the embryo but didn't see a heartbeat. My dr said I might just be a few days behind where we thought and that could make a difference. I am cautiously optimistic but also nervous, Waiting a week for another ultrasound will be torture.
Rants/Raves/Dear Diary?
GTKY: What’s your favorite movie (or movies if you are like me and can’t pick one lol) So many. I love the Usual Suspects, Dirty Dancing, Goodfellas , Four Christmases, Dallas buyers club. Totally random!
How far along are you/EDD? 6w 2d
Current mood? Anxious and stressed - had some brown spotting this morning, and I don't think my OB is going to be able to fit me in today or tomorrow. Just really makes me nervous because this is how everything started the first time, just a few days earlier in the pregnancy.
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable. MC January 4 of this year at exactly 6 weeks
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs? Crossing my fingers I'll be able to get something on the books for today or tomorrow, but if not, my first scan is this coming Tuesday, 2/26.
Rants/Raves/Dear Diary? Well, I cried in the shower this morning. Mostly because I was mad at myself for being so excited that we made it past the point we did last time. Just feeling pretty down and distracted right now.
GTKY: What’s your favorite movie (or movies if you are like me and can’t pick one lol) Love Actually, 500 Days of Summer, The Graduate, Good Will Hunting
I’m going to step away for a few weeks. I had an ultrasound today that didn’t go as expected. There was a gestational sac but no yolk sac. My MFM doctor was very optimistic that I just ovulated much later than we thought, I didn’t track my cycle in January. I am a lot less optimistic, This whole appointment was very triggering as this is very similar pattern to my first loss. I hope I’m wrong and will return in a couple weeks. If I don’t return I wish you all rainbows.
HX
DSD: 17
DS: 4(Nov'14)
MMC:8/17
MMC: 1/18
BFP: 2/7/19 EDD:10/16/19
Tickers
@kindbytealikat I'm so sorry you didn't get the news you were hoping for today. Doing the math though 6 weeks can be too early to see the HB. Plus if your O is off a few days.... I know what a crapshoot this is and you're trying to prepare your heart. I'll be thinking of you and sending big hugs! (Also, FYI - constipation AND diarrhea were totally something I dealt with too)
@kindbytealikat will be praying that your doc is right to be optimistic and we'll be seeing you back here soon! Please take care of yourself.
My 7 Year Journey ***Tw in spoiler***
IVF #1 - September 2018; Follistim, Menopur, Cetrotide & Lupron/HCG combo trigger; PGS; ICSI
Back on Levothyroxine
FET #1 - October 2018; cancelled, all PGS aneuploid
FET #1 - November 30th, transferred anyway
Wondfo BFP 5dp5dt, CB Digi 6dpt,
1st Beta on 7dpt 93
2nd Beta on 10dpt 510!
TTC #1 since 2011. Tried for 5 years before we knew there was a one year rule.
Diag w/MS 2016; w/PCOS & IF 2017
New RE 2018; PCOS diagnosis taken away, IF due to ovary adhesions, but prev. RE insists PCOS IF
IUI
IUI #1 July 2017 w/100mg Clo+trigger; BFN; benched w/big cysts
IUI #2 October 2017 w/50mg Clo+trigger; BFN; benched w/big cysts
IUI #3 February 2018 w/5mg Femara+trigger; low P
BFP February; mc March; Subclinical hypothyroid started Levothyroxine
IUI #4 March 2018 w/7.5mg Femara+trigger; BFN
Medicated cycle & TI April 2018 w/7.5mg Femara+trigger; BFN
Tried several cycles on our own; all BFN
Current mood? Scared AF scared to get happy, scared to tell anyone, scared to get comfortable
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable. Started spotting at the start of a three day weekend. Finally got in on Tuesday and found out that development and heartbeat had stopped and that I had a missed abortion. My doctor was great and got me in for my D&C the very next day.
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs? My first appointment is this Wednesday. Im in knots about it.
How far along are you/EDD? 7w1d / Oct 10th
Current mood? Anxious, nauseous (if that’s a mood lol), scared.
If you haven't already/want to again, please share your loss history, if comfortable. Found out about our first pregnancy in 7/2018 after 5 months TTC. At first US, I was supposed to be 8w3d by LMP but was only measuring 6ish weeks and no FHR. I started bleeding 2 days later and took many many months to start healing emotionally.
Any upcoming appointments, milestones, loss anniversaries, EDDs? My SIL is due with her first in April, which is when I should have been due as well. My next US for this pregnancy isn’t until end of March for FT screening.
Rants/Raves/Dear Diary? I don’t understand it but I’m still triggered by pregnant family members, coworkers, even celebs! I realize I don’t know what their journeys were like, but it still makes me sad/mad.
GTKY: What’s your favorite movie (or movies if you are like me and can’t pick one lol) The Princess Diaries!
It's a goodbye for now. No growth. Emotionally I am actually OK, but waiting for the physical part to happen is utter angst. I appreciate the support and outlet from this board.
Wishing everyone the best for their rainbows.