Thanks @kayjay44! I think I might stick to my plan then. The last time I was around a baby was when I was 10 years old and dealing with my little brother. He turned 20 last July. H has even less experience than me, so we'll need all the help we can get.
I didn't mention doing a hospital tour, but yeah. That's definitely on my list. As for food, our favorite Mexican place AND favorite Thai place are in walking distance so we're good on that end!
DS born 2/18/2019 DD born 4/1/2023 Baby #3 EDD 11/21/2024
@grebretso - I’m happy to answer any other questions you have!!
Our friends own Un Bien and brought us our first meal after the baby was born - I’m going to ask them to do it again because it was the best thing I ever tasted. After DD, I had my ILs bring me Dick’s. Second best meal I’ve ever had
Ohhh man don't even mention Dick's. It takes every ounce of me not to go there every day, by far my biggest craving. I've heard good things about Un Bien, but I've never been! We tried going once, but H and I always go out to eat Mondays and that's the one day they're closed. Someday!
DS born 2/18/2019 DD born 4/1/2023 Baby #3 EDD 11/21/2024
For all moms interested in breastfeeding, now is a great time to look for a local lactation consultant and support group like Le Leche League. They welcome pregnant moms to the meetings, and they are free!
@sjnsjnsjn - with my first, we watched the office. I was having back labor and blacking out from the pain. The episode where Michael outs Oscar came on and the “f-word” (not fuck, which would have been better - the slur for gay people) keeps getting repeated and I remember clearly thinking “oh god, they aren’t going to let us take this kid home after this” but was in so much pain I couldn’t change it. Luckily, they still let us take DD home
Ok... Random thought. What week did you start noticing milk come in. I am not there yet buty ocd brain would like to have some idea if possible. I know it can vary but even a range is helpful
Ok... Random thought. What week did you start noticing milk come in. I am not there yet buty ocd brain would like to have some idea if possible. I know it can vary but even a range is helpful
I noticed crusty colostrum (yum) on my nips from around 34w and on.
As as far as my milk coming it, it wasn’t till a day’ish post delivery (c-section).
@hnbergeron - With my first, I didn't leak colostrum until at least 35 weeks and it wasn't much. With my second it was earlier and more, but I don't remember exactly when. I wouldn't be surprised if it happens early again since I've already fed two babies.
Dumb FTM question related to milk coming in: If your milk doesn't come in until a day or three (like it seems is normal) after birth, do babies just... not eat meanwhile? I know nothing about breastfeeding it turns out!
DS born 2/18/2019 DD born 4/1/2023 Baby #3 EDD 11/21/2024
I’ve been leaking colostrum since 24ish weeks! But only out of my right boob... Is that weird? And that’s a good question about what do babies eat until the milk comes in. I’ve always heard that your body produces what your baby needs but it does seem odd!
Dumb FTM question related to milk coming in: If your milk doesn't come in until a day or three (like it seems is normal) after birth, do babies just... not eat meanwhile? I know nothing about breastfeeding it turns out!
That’s what the colostrum is for. It’s the “pre-milk” and super nutrient rich.
Getting baby to breast early and often helps to stimulate milk production. It helped me to really look at things as supply & demand - the more I do it, the more it tells my body to produce.
Like @okayestmom12 said the days before your actual milk comes in they are getting colostrum which is there immediately for them. It’s high calorie and high nutrient (what is often referred to as ‘liquid gold’).
My actual milk didn’t come in until 5 days post delivery and my baby was fine on colostrum during that time. It also helped she was almost 10lbs at birth.
It just depends on your body and each reaction to each baby. I never leaked with either of my first two. With DD, my milk took 3-4 days to come in. With DD, my milk came in on day 2. The more you nurse in the beginning, the more you stimulate those glands. Until the milk comes in, your baby is getting plenty of colostrum to keep them growing and thriving.
@grebretso- That is a very valid question, and I only learned the answer to that question and many many others at the BF class I took at the hospital. Mentioning since I know you were considering it anyways.
Who would of thought BF is more complicated than I thought
I remember people telling me how “natural” it was with my first. And on one hand, it absolutely is. But on the other, it was the most unnatural thing ever because there was such a learning curve.
That being said, it became SO EASY for myself and my son once we got the hang of it. Surround yourself with support, gather some knowledge, and you’ll be good.
And... bonus! You’ll have a bunch of us who have nursed before to troubleshoot as needed.
A lactation consultant told me that people always talk about how natural breastfeeding is making it sound like it’s always easy. But she said think about it like walking, that is completely natural but you still had to learn to do it and you had help along the way. It made me feel better about all the trouble I was having in the beginning. I viewed it more as learning as I went as opposed to it just happening like that and being perfect.
All I know for certain is that babies will keep you guessing. My mom never went into labor naturally, and all her kids were big and late. I have a LOT of her genes and my last pregnancy was very similar to hers so I was sure I was going to be the same way. Plus, they say FTMs tend to go later into pregnancy. DD surprised me by breaking my water at 38 weeks exactly, though I never technically went into labor either, and she was on the smaller side. I also needed a C-section, which my mom never had, and DD went to the NICU, which never happened to me or my siblings. I am a big planner, and tend to consider the what-ifs and the unexpected, and was still caught off guard. Ever since, DD sure has been keeping me on my toes lol
ETA while we're on that vein, I had "planned" (hoped) for an ummedicated water birth at a birth center. LOL! I didn't even get a chance to try ANY of the pain management techniques I had practiced because I was strapped to a fetal monitor the entire time and literally could not move or else the monitor would slip out of place and not work. So just fyi that that can happen.
@hnbergeron I was never diagnosed with hg, and while I'm pretty sure I didn't have it with DD, I was close. I wish I had a magic answer for you because that shit is MISERABLE. And I didn't technically have hg so i know those who do have it even worse. I tried all the tricks. Ginger. Sea bands. Nibbling saltines/trying to avoid an empty stomach. I took zofran but was skeptical on whether it really did anything. In the end, you just bite down and bear it because you don't have a choice. The good news is that there is an end. This will not be your life from here on out. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, so do whatever you gotta do to just keep swimming, and eventually you'll get there. I am not as bad with the nausea/vomiting this go around, though it is still ever present and not fun at all. I echo @kayjay44 in that i kept/keep stashes of barf bags EVERYWHERE. Last pregnancy I was in my sister's wedding so I had to stash them in my bra that day. I work at nights so luckily not around (awake) people for the most part, but I also work in other people's homes so I do the best I can to be as discreet and neat as possible when puking.
I am so sorry you are dealing with this. I don't wish it on my worst enemy.
ETA if you are having any heartburn induced vomiting. Keeping a good posture/sitting upright helps to not make it worse for me. Which kind of sucks because when you feel like crap all you wanna do is slouch and lie down. But there it is.
Ok... Random thought. What week did you start noticing milk come in. I am not there yet buty ocd brain would like to have some idea if possible. I know it can vary but even a range is helpful
I noticed crusty colostrum (yum) on my nips from around 34w and on.
As as far as my milk coming it, it wasn’t till a day’ish post delivery (c-section).
Pretty much this. After I first noticed the crusty colostrum, if I cleaned it off and expressed I could get maybe a drop (I was curious, but didn't push it farther than that because I didn't want to encourage leaking if I didn't have to yet lol). I also had oversupply though.
Who would of thought BF is more complicated than I thought
I remember people telling me how “natural” it was with my first. And on one hand, it absolutely is. But on the other, it was the most unnatural thing ever because there was such a learning curve.
That being said, it became SO EASY for myself and my son once we got the hang of it. Surround yourself with support, gather some knowledge, and you’ll be good.
And... bonus! You’ll have a bunch of us who have nursed before to troubleshoot as needed.
This was my experience too. But just know that it is very common for breastfeeding to not work out for SO many different reasons. Until hearing the experiences of some of my bmb buddies, I never realized how many things need to "go right" for breastfeeding to work. Kind of like getting pregnant. Some people seem to get pregnant effortlessly. For others, it takes a lot of planning, trial and error, assistance, and even then it doesn't always work out. But that doesn't mean there's anything "wrong" with you (or baby). It's just how life works sometimes and you are certainly not alone in any sense
One thing I didn’t know about BFing - cluster feeding, especially the second night (which was actually first night for us bc DD was born in the morning). It’s the stuff nightmares are made of. She was on my boob the entire night. I was exhausted. She’d wake up within minutes of being laid down. H had to stay awake to make I stayed awake while I was nursing. We finally had the nurse take her out for two hours (my finest new mom moment - rolling my eyes and being annoyed when the nurse brought her back two hours later to be fed again. ).
So make sure you get rest throughout the day - I was so high on adrenaline the entire day, but this time I’m definitely making an effort to sleep and turn people away if needed. Have nurse take her if you need - baby can sense when mom is around and naturally want to nurse more (even if not getting anything).
My hospital doesn’t have a nursery but they still took her out just so we could get a little rest.
@ginger1228 yes to the cluster feeding! Definitely a rough night. I also had many times in the first few weeks where we would be cluster feeding and it was so exhausting. I felt like all I did was bf.
My youngest went on an eating binge the night before I was going to be discharged. He was going to have to stay because his bilirubin levels were still too high. He ate all night long and the nurse was shocked when they took his levels the next morning and he was good to go home with me. Guess he took it as a challenge!
@grebretso colostrum is milk. Mature milk is the thin white stuff you think or when you think of milk, that takes a bit to come in. With my first it took 10 days. With my second it happened sooner. Colostrum is extremely nutrient dense, and a newborn stomach is the size of a marble. Milk transitions from colostrum to more mature milk in those first days the more you put baby to the breast. It matches the demands of your baby. Milk changes throughout your breastfeeding journey as well and adapts to provide antibodies when your baby is sick.
Re: Ask A STM week of Oct 29
I didn't mention doing a hospital tour, but yeah. That's definitely on my list. As for food, our favorite Mexican place AND favorite Thai place are in walking distance so we're good on that end!
DD born 4/1/2023
Baby #3 EDD 11/21/2024
Our friends own Un Bien and brought us our first meal after the baby was born - I’m going to ask them to do it again because it was the best thing I ever tasted. After DD, I had my ILs bring me Dick’s. Second best meal I’ve ever had
BFP 6.8.2018 EDD 02.18.2019
DD born 4/1/2023
Baby #3 EDD 11/21/2024
BFP 6.8.2018 EDD 02.18.2019
As as far as my milk coming it, it wasn’t till a day’ish post delivery (c-section).
MMC 2.12.11 @ 8w
PVM 5.8.12
GWM 3.17.15
RPM 2.21.19
BFP 6.8.2018 EDD 02.18.2019
*TW*
TWIN LOSS 7.2.15
BFP 9.7.15 CP
BFP 12.31.15 MC 2.28.16
BFP 10.14.17 CP
BFP 3.10.18 D&C 4.13.18
DD born 4/1/2023
Baby #3 EDD 11/21/2024
And that’s a good question about what do babies eat until the milk comes in. I’ve always heard that your body produces what your baby needs but it does seem odd!
Getting baby to breast early and often helps to stimulate milk production. It helped me to really look at things as supply & demand - the more I do it, the more it tells my body to produce.
MMC 2.12.11 @ 8w
PVM 5.8.12
GWM 3.17.15
RPM 2.21.19
My actual milk didn’t come in until 5 days post delivery and my baby was fine on colostrum during that time. It also helped she was almost 10lbs at birth.
That being said, it became SO EASY for myself and my son once we got the hang of it. Surround yourself with support, gather some knowledge, and you’ll be good.
And... bonus! You’ll have a bunch of us who have nursed before to troubleshoot as needed.
MMC 2.12.11 @ 8w
PVM 5.8.12
GWM 3.17.15
RPM 2.21.19
ETA while we're on that vein, I had "planned" (hoped) for an ummedicated water birth at a birth center. LOL! I didn't even get a chance to try ANY of the pain management techniques I had practiced because I was strapped to a fetal monitor the entire time and literally could not move or else the monitor would slip out of place and not work. So just fyi that that can happen.
I am so sorry you are dealing with this. I don't wish it on my worst enemy.
ETA if you are having any heartburn induced vomiting. Keeping a good posture/sitting upright helps to not make it worse for me. Which kind of sucks because when you feel like crap all you wanna do is slouch and lie down. But there it is.
So make sure you get rest throughout the day - I was so high on adrenaline the entire day, but this time I’m definitely making an effort to sleep and turn people away if needed. Have nurse take her if you need - baby can sense when mom is around and naturally want to nurse more (even if not getting anything).
My hospital doesn’t have a nursery but they still took her out just so we could get a little rest.
Edit for spelling