I have felt very similarly to what most have expressed here. I didn't feel connected at all until about 19 weeks, because I was just so scared of something bad happening. I have alot of anxiety about what could happen, and often think in my head "if I wasn't pregnant I could...." I feel so guilty for thinking that, because I truly want this baby very much, but it is how I feel sometimes. I find myself wishing these days away, so I can get back to or change the things I can't now. I am also struggling with bringing a baby home and not having enough time with dd1, which makes this pregnancy not as exciting.
It's so, so important to talk about mental health, wtg to everyone who has expressed their feelings here. You're not alone!
Couple days late! Yes I was sick for a while last time, way longer than first tri but it was more of a "I can't eat that/anything, eew" after a while, rather than "I'm gonna puke if you touch me", like this time. Plus I worked way more and never even felt desperate enough for drugs. Now I'm just weaning off Diclegis at 23 weeks and I still don't think I'm quite ready. Feeling a lot more hopeless about it this time too! As for early breastfeeding it's definitely a slog, but I wound up breastfeeding my daughter literally forever and it became second nature. Hoping no new issues pop up like a tongue tie (no jinx) that complicates matters this time, but I think I took it soooooo personally last time that I be perfect at it, that I can't possibly hold myself to that high of a standard this time.
I also love this thread. Part of my loves being pregnant, especially after infertility. But part of me finds it uncomfortable and weird. Nothing wrong with that!
Also, I wanted to share that doing something I love for baby made me feel more connected to her in case anyone is interested in trying that. I'm a knitter- been doing it for over 15 years and I recently knit her two baby hats. I picked yarn I love the feel of and the colors of and patterns I really like in my style. I made them and just focused on the excitement of creating something for my child when she is born.
Maybe if anyone is in to art like painting or crafts or even just decorating the nursery that is a nice way to connect without feeling like you have to love being pregnant. Also because it is more focused on the end result than the pregnancy. Just throwing that out there.
I also love this thread. Part of my loves being pregnant, especially after infertility. But part of me finds it uncomfortable and weird. Nothing wrong with that!
Also, I wanted to share that doing something I love for baby made me feel more connected to her in case anyone is interested in trying that. I'm a knitter- been doing it for over 15 years and I recently knit her two baby hats. I picked yarn I love the feel of and the colors of and patterns I really like in my style. I made them and just focused on the excitement of creating something for my child when she is born.
Maybe if anyone is in to art like painting or crafts or even just decorating the nursery that is a nice way to connect without feeling like you have to love being pregnant. Also because it is more focused on the end result than the pregnancy. Just throwing that out there.
I’ve been starting to sing and play guitar to her (so she’ll get used to it anyway) but also, a little guilty here: I notice she seems to settle down and pay attention if I sing to her (at least right now when I guess it’s new to her). And I sometimes do it when her activity is distracting:/ I do want her to move around if she needs to, but sometimes I DO sing to make her chill out lol
I know this is an old thread now, but I just wanted to share how much I appreciate all of your honesty! I hope we would never ever have anyone come in here and judge how a woman is feeling about the experience of being pregnant. Pregnancy is a super personal journey, and there is no right or wrong way to feel.
And I'm also here to say every pregnancy is different. I wouldn't say I connected immediately with DD. But I did LOVE feeling her movements. It was my absolute favorite part. This time I find myself thinking more about how strange it actually is that a small human is moving around and messing with my insides. And how weird it is that there is this insane process happening inside of my body, and I almost feel like a bystander to it all. Yes, it is my body helping her grow and develop, but I don't see or actively participate in any of that process. It makes me feel like just a vessel in some sense.
Moral of the story - pregnancy is weird, and no one should be judged on their thoughts / feelings / reactions to the process.
Hugs ladies!
Me: 28 DH: 26 Married: November 2015 TTC#1: January 2016 BFP #1: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16 BFP #2: 10/06/16: 6 - EDD: 06/20/17 DD Born 06/23/17 TFAS: April 2018 BFP #3: 03/21/18 - CP BFP #4: 04/23/18 - EDD 01/04/19
Re: Depression?
It's so, so important to talk about mental health, wtg to everyone who has expressed their feelings here. You're not alone!
Also, I wanted to share that doing something I love for baby made me feel more connected to her in case anyone is interested in trying that. I'm a knitter- been doing it for over 15 years and I recently knit her two baby hats. I picked yarn I love the feel of and the colors of and patterns I really like in my style. I made them and just focused on the excitement of creating something for my child when she is born.
Maybe if anyone is in to art like painting or crafts or even just decorating the nursery that is a nice way to connect without feeling like you have to love being pregnant. Also because it is more focused on the end result than the pregnancy. Just throwing that out there.
And I'm also here to say every pregnancy is different. I wouldn't say I connected immediately with DD. But I did LOVE feeling her movements. It was my absolute favorite part. This time I find myself thinking more about how strange it actually is that a small human is moving around and messing with my insides. And how weird it is that there is this insane process happening inside of my body, and I almost feel like a bystander to it all. Yes, it is my body helping her grow and develop, but I don't see or actively participate in any of that process. It makes me feel like just a vessel in some sense.
Moral of the story - pregnancy is weird, and no one should be judged on their thoughts / feelings / reactions to the process.
Hugs ladies!
Married: November 2015
TTC#1: January 2016
BFP #1: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16
BFP #2: 10/06/16: 6 - EDD: 06/20/17
DD Born 06/23/17
TFAS: April 2018
BFP #3: 03/21/18 - CP
BFP #4: 04/23/18 - EDD 01/04/19