@bieberm04 my son just turned 17 months, so we’re in the same boat!! This LOs due date is 5 days before DS turns 2. UGH.
Im stressed about it too, but I try to remember how close they’ll (hopefully?) be when they grow up. That tends to calm me down. I’m sure that first year is going to be brutal though, and it really scares me
Hello, I am new to this group my 1st daughter is 19 months and I think I am more freaked out the 2nd time around. I am a OCD planner and we were not planning on having another baby so quickly ( or possibly at all) and i have had a lot of issues I didn't have with my first. I keep telling myself that woman have babys alot closer in age then I will but im still freaking out and starting to get depressed by it.
I think this is a normal response - we weren't trying either so I vacillate between being happy and wondering what the hell we've done. Have you talked to your OB and/or your spouse about how you're feeling? A therapist might be helpful, too.
Thanks @kayjay44! You're probably right about it being a friable cervix, it's crossed my mind before. I had my first 1:1 today after the US, when I did the vag swab I bumped my cervix once very gently and the cotton bit was literally saturated with blood. A couple hours later and I'm spotting again, now it's brown/beige. The fact that it looks exactly like my previous spotting makes me think it was likely from my cervix earlier too.
Also, we had sex once a few weeks ago and I literally had blood running down my legs. I know it's not dangerous, but it looks hella scary! Stupid sensitive cervix.
DH isn’t getting any here until the nausea subsides. If you’ve never had to stop having sex to vomit (I have!), it’s pretty much the worst, unromantic, unsexy thing in the world.
@BourbonBiscuits Yup. Not to mention the heavy bleeding and cramping (which was definitely NOT from my cervix) I had at week 4-5. I was certain I lost the baby then, because it looked and felt exactly like my previous CP. Luckily I was able to get my HCG checked at that point, and the numbers almost tripled. This pregnancy has had a really rocky start! It will take some time to actually let it sink in that today's US was as textbook perfect as it could be. I'm so relieved you have no idea. Actually, you all probably do know exactly how relieved I am. That's the beauty of this group! I'm so thankful for you all!
I have an extensive history. Started at 4 years old. Just wanted others to know you're not alone, and you're stronger than you know.
Already this pregnancy is different from last because I have experienced infertility in between and didn't realize how much that would/did affect me. I'm like others here that I have trouble connecting this time because I'm constantly expecting something bad to happen because of course.
I a complete stress case right now. I am 10 w with hopefully kiddo two. Kiddo one is nearly two years old. My list of constant worries includes: how we are going to afford child care and everything for a second kid, considering we are barely making it with the one; where said baby is going to sleep at the start, since our room has giant windows and skylights and is bright starting super early; whether this baby will be ok since I am 42 and ya know #oldeggs; how we will deal with my toddler surrounding the labor/delivery situation because we live nowhere near family and our friends here aren't that kind of friends unfortunately... the list goes on and on! Anxiety wtf!
Hey girls-
Send up some prayers or good vibes or whatever you believe in. TW maybe? I’m having some really heavy bleeding and am honestly in a ball panicking at my doctors office waiting to be seen.
Hey girls-
Send up some prayers or good vibes or whatever you believe in. TW maybe? I’m having some really heavy bleeding and am honestly in a ball panicking at my doctors office waiting to be seen.
Your good vibes worked! Baby is doing great - strong heartbeat and was wiggling like a wild thing. Still waiting for the doctor to call and explain the bleeding, but baby is happy and healthy. Thank you guys so much for thinking of us ❤️
I am so relieved for you @BourbonBiscuits! Been refreshing the app like crazy for an update! Hooray for a strong little baby!!! Fingers crossed the bleeding stops soon if it hasn’t already!
I have an extensive history. Started at 4 years old. Just wanted others to know you're not alone, and you're stronger than you know.
Already this pregnancy is different from last because I have experienced infertility in between and didn't realize how much that would/did affect me. I'm like others here that I have trouble connecting this time because I'm constantly expecting something bad to happen because of course.
I hear you about the expecting something bad to happen. I conceived my son the month after a D&C to resolve a mmc, and I was very traumatized by that. I spent my whole pregnancy with my son on emotional pins and needles. I am already feeling that way again with this one... My goal is to try to do things that relax and me and remember that fear are only that.
@lifeislove87 thank you!! I just about cried when I saw it kicking around in there. I was so relieved. And now DS carries the US pics around and says “baybeeeeee baybeeee”
I'm still pretty new to the group but I am trying to post more as I get more Bump access I have been really struggling the last two weeks after my BFP. This pregnancy was completely unplanned. I really dislike pregnancy and I was not mentally prepared to go through this again. I hate that pregnancy all of the sudden gives society a free ticket to make comments about my body size, sex life, try to touch me, etc. I just honestly hate it. I wish I could hide in my house every day. Each day I wake up and feel like crap and it fuels my sadness and disappointment that I am pregnant, again, unexpectedly. I've cried quite a bit. I feel guilty that I don't feel connected or even a little excited about this LO. DS is almost 16 months. How will we pay for daycare? Did I rip away his babyhood? How do I love another little human as much as I love him? All this to say- I'm struggling. DH has been very supportive but he is SO excited and it's hard for him to really understand the way I am feeling. I feel alone.
@bww_0331 - I’ve got similar feelings sometimes. This wasn’t planned and I’m finding I am having a hard time getting excited like I was with the others. I’m mostly just anxious about it and wondering if I (because my brain tells me this is all my fault when I know rationally it takes two to make a baby) fucked everything up. We hadn’t committed to having a third and were going to discuss it this fall. I’m just anxious when I should be happy. And I’m projecting on DH. It sucks. You’re not alone.
I can tell you though, as a mom of two, you will absolutely love #2 just as much - it’s just different. Also my first two are two years apart - now at 4 and 2 they play together and have developed a wonderful relationship. And typing all of this out is making me feel better about my own situation....
It’s very interesting to me that so many of us are unplanned pregnancies. I’ve been struggling, as well. Seeing the baby on the ultrasound has helped a little, but I’m still super stressed and anxious about it.
Like @kayjay44, this is our third child. I have a 4yo and an almost 1yo (he turns 1 on Tuesday). I can back up @kayjay44 100%. I love my son just as much as I love my daughter, it’s just a different love and different bond. The love they have for each other is just so amazing to witness. They have such an awesome bond already. Ultimately, I know this new baby will end up the same way. It’s just really hard to remember some times. I catch myself frequently scared and anxious for the exact same reasons. You are definitely not alone.
@bww_0331 it is very common for one to have lots of anxiety about any pregnancy situation, including the specific worry about not loving #2 as much as #1. I have heard that so many times, and every time, once #2 was born, that worry was completely gone.
Not to diminish your anxiety/depression. It is very real and can be very tough to deal with. But I hope it helps to know you are very much not alone. Also, most guys just don't get it, unfortunately.
If you are really struggling, I hope there is a professional you are able to turn to; if nothing else, then your PCP. I have been seeing a psychiatrist regularly since I was 19 and I wish there wasn't such a stigma attached to getting help, because I feel like so many wait to do so until it's too late. I'm sorry you're having a rough time. Don't forget to take care of yourself
Mine was planned and I am having a lot of those same questions/anxieties! Very normal. But I am in therapy and have been for years. Highly recommend that.
Re: Mental Health Check-in (7.16 - 7.23)
Im stressed about it too, but I try to remember how close they’ll (hopefully?) be when they grow up. That tends to calm me down. I’m sure that first year is going to be brutal though, and it really scares me
BFP 6.8.2018 EDD 02.18.2019
Also, we had sex once a few weeks ago and I literally had blood running down my legs. I know it's not dangerous, but it looks hella scary! Stupid sensitive cervix.
BFP 6.8.2018 EDD 02.18.2019
Already this pregnancy is different from last because I have experienced infertility in between and didn't realize how much that would/did affect me. I'm like others here that I have trouble connecting this time because I'm constantly expecting something bad to happen because of course.
BFP 6.8.2018 EDD 02.18.2019
BFP 6.8.2018 EDD 02.18.2019
BFP 6.8.2018 EDD 02.18.2019
BFP 6.8.2018 EDD 02.18.2019
BFP 6.8.2018 EDD 02.18.2019
Like @kayjay44, this is our third child. I have a 4yo and an almost 1yo (he turns 1 on Tuesday). I can back up @kayjay44 100%. I love my son just as much as I love my daughter, it’s just a different love and different bond. The love they have for each other is just so amazing to witness. They have such an awesome bond already. Ultimately, I know this new baby will end up the same way. It’s just really hard to remember some times. I catch myself frequently scared and anxious for the exact same reasons. You are definitely not alone.
Not to diminish your anxiety/depression. It is very real and can be very tough to deal with. But I hope it helps to know you are very much not alone.
If you are really struggling, I hope there is a professional you are able to turn to; if nothing else, then your PCP. I have been seeing a psychiatrist regularly since I was 19 and I wish there wasn't such a stigma attached to getting help, because I feel like so many wait to do so until it's too late. I'm sorry you're having a rough time. Don't forget to take care of yourself