Hey guys! Sorry for not following the format but there is a potential for a c-section for me as I LO was breech at last appt. DH was asking (because of course he was) how long until sex after c-section because its not a vaginal birth. Dr. Google just says the incision won't heal for 6-8 weeks and not to do it til cleared by doc and you "feel ready" but just wondered what your experiences were with this, and when you were cleared by your doc/when you had sex for the first time. I assume the pain from the incision will definitely keep you out of the game for awhile.
@SmashJam i was cleared around 6 weeks at the usual appointment but honestly sex was the last thing on my mind. However with my other less invasive abdominal surgeries (endo and appendix) I felt good enough within a month but was cleared at 2 weeks.
@SmashJam I was cleared at 6w last time. The concern is the internal wound in your uterus where the placenta attached in regards to infection so the interval is typically the same as a vaginal birth. I was surprised to have a lot of pain and discomfort the first few times with penetration... Took a lot of lube and patience for it to be comfortable! The pain from my incision was minimal by the 4w mark.
@gingerbride26 I wonder if your husband could go down to recovery? That way he can be there why you wake up and be there with baby. I know in my case they just had my husband do skin to skin right away in my room while i was down in recovery.
@lindsayleigh1989 good question. I was assuming he'd be in recovery, but I'm second guessing that now a bit. They just said they keep baby with mom in the OR, and since it's general i'm also assuming they won't want me holding a baby unsupervised coming out of meds lol plus I would assume they'd want to release the nurse back to other duties ASAP and would hand off to father if couldn't hand off to mother. Of course we all know what happens when you assume ;-) UO/confession - totally half joked to a friend today "wonder if they can just do a tummy tuck while they're in there" lol
@gingerbride26 regarding the tummy tuck joke i recently read something that it doesn’t not always give the expected results because your uterus is still not down to it’s normal size. So they are just working on an already swollen body.
@wildtot I was thinking that too - esp since I heard you sometimes look MORE pregnant after a CS because of all the air the gets in. I've def heard of double wammy tummy tuck and hysterectomy though - but let's wait another 10-20 years for that please.
@gingerbride26 I’ll be getting my tubes tied for now at my CS and then go for a full hysterectomy in about 1-2 years once I’m done BF and can manage recovery with two kids around. This baby making machine is closed!
Posting and ghosting most of the time but I didn't mind the stomach massages this go around (I honestly don't remember them from DD). I am 90% less sore from this c section than with DD though, so I'm sure that contributes.
1. Are you definitely having a c-section, considering one, or more likely than average to need one? If already scheduled, when are you having it?
I was for sure having a c/s due to breech presentation, but baby turned. Now I have hypertension and most likely delivering at 37 weeks, which starts on Saturday for me.
2. Why are you having or possibly having a c-section?
Hypertension/AMA
4. How do you feel about having or potentially having a c-section?
I actually feel calmer about a c/s than a vaginal delivery. I was willing to try vagina delivery, but I've always preferred to get a c/s.
QUESTION:Do you guys have a csection recovery band or binder?? How soon can you put one on?
@coco305 my hospital provided one. I didn’t put in on until day 2 or 3 I believe. Most of day 1 I wasn’t actually getting out of bed, so it wasn’t until I was walking around more that I felt like I needed it.
question for previous c-section mom's - DH is now asking/suggesting if maybe he should delay his leave until I get out of the hospital instead of starting day of c-section (he would still take off the day off but go back to work the day after until i'm discharged). His thought is that while i'm in the hospital I have the nurses, but when I'm home I'm alone and will need him more there... He was already going to be going home at night to take care of DD and furbaby. At first I'll be honest I flipped out about it, but as the hormone rage ebbs I think he might have a point... plus he gets restless in the hospital and I can't deal with cranky hubby post op ;-)
@gingerbride26 Are you saying you will be in the hospital alone the rest of the time? H stayed with me the whole time and it was nice to get his help with the diaper changes at least. I didn’t want to use the nurses all the time so that we could get in our own routine and learn. Now with this baby, he personally wants to be there the whole time, but it’s more of a bonding reason. He will be taking a day away to be with DS and my mom will be in the hospital with me.
@wildtot yea pretty much - he'd come for a few hours in the afternoon/evening with or without DD but would work most of the day and go home with DD at her bedtime for the night. My mom-mentor at works says she honestly wished DH wasn't there because he just whined and the nurses are great about helping and make you get up and move around anyway so it shouldn't be a big deal and she'll come visit me if I want to help out.
@gingerbride26 if he’s gonna complain or whine after the first day I’d say yeah you don’t want to deal with that. Personally I’d probably be the one complaining and annoying H lol. But i don’t see anything wrong with it if that’s at you prefer. He will at least be with your DD.
@lindsayleigh1989 DD will be at daycare from like 7 or 8 until 6:30 (unless he picks her up early and brings her to hospital with him every day, but honestly she's 2 with short attention span so might be more handful than worth). He was thinking he'd go into work early and leave a bit early to be at the hospital for a couple hours, then go home with DD at night. While I was flipping out he said something about he could have his parents come over after he puts DD down and come to the hospital then - but idea of MIL unsupervised in my house gives me agite.
Its sounding like in-hospital alone is (while not ideal) doable and he'd be more helpful at home after so I'm not overdoing it - which I'm sooooo prone to without adult supervision.
@gingerbride26 I’m creeping and not planning on a c-section at this point but I have an anecdote.
My bff had an unplanned c-section in April and her husband wasn’t able to be at the hospital with her much unless it was in the evening and I wasn’t able to be with her hardly at all because I always have my kids and it’s against the rules to have non-siblings in rooms, and she lives across the country from family. Anyways. While she said it was fine to not have him there, she definitelt overdid it a little bit trying to take care of baby right after surgery alone. The nurses are helpful but can’t be with you 100% of the time.
Logically I would want more time with my H at home than I would in the hospital but I would be sad to be alone for several days (minus however long H came to visit) and have a hard time doing it all at the hospital.
@gingerbride26 Hospital recovery after my first c section was rough. I couldn't hardly get out of bed, and definitely needed assistance to do so. DD cried a lot and there was zero sleep so it was nice having someone else help that wasn't a nurse. With my second c section, recovery has been much easier and a lot less painful. However, DS was in the NICU and I couldn't have done it emotionally without DH. I'm not saying complications are a guarantee, more that nothing is a gaurentee and it was nice to have my support person there for me. The c section also happened 5 days ahead of schedule and the person set to watch DD couldn't so we had to find other plans. Eventually, I told the two people to just figure it out together. It was a difficult delivery emotionally and I just had faith DD would be fine, and she was - even though it wasn't how we planned it.
I guess all I'm saying it do what works for you. If you need DH there, I'm sure your current LO would be fine with your MIL - even if it's not what your originally planned. And if DH is going to be a better support person at home, then do that. Go with your gut!
I personally would plan for best and worse case. I’m just a big planner though. With DS my incision opened so i was restricted to the bed longer so H had to do more with baby. At the same time i would like DS to have someone familiar around (H) when possible because i fear he’ll get sad and he’s not use to my parents much since they are from out of state.
I can’t imagine getting through the first 12 hours post surgery without help. Also, my hospital wouldn’t allow baby to stay with you in your room overnight after a c section if no one was staying with you
I agree with plan for best and worst - I am a PM after all ;-) -Best case he'll stay day-of and then work W-F, worst case if there's complications he'll stay days and go home nights (assuming that's still possible). I'm really ok sending the baby to the nursery except for feedings at night, and it's really important to me that DD's routine is disturbed as little as possible - which means going to daycare as usual and getting a good night sleep - which isn't going to happen if MIL is watching her - woman still hasn't really figured out the carseat 2 years in and can't seem to put DD down for the night without her waking up 5x which is so out of character.
@gingerbride26 honestly I can’t imagine not having someone there in the hospital with me. Yes, the nurses will help and they’re amazing, but there were so many little things that it was nice to have help with but I never would have rang the nurse for. For example, if I couldnt reach the phone to order food, needed the table slid in a different way to eat, wanted some more water from the pantry room, etc.
If he stays in the hospital with you, how much time would he still get off work and at home with you post-discharge?
Is there someone else that could come stay with you for at least the first day or two? Not during delivery itself, but when he goes back to work. By the time I was discharged I was moving around a lot better. There was a lot more pain and limited movement those first couple days in the hospital.
@tarheelgirl8 it's 1:1 for his time - so 3 days upfront equal 3 less days on the backend. He gets 6 weeks paternal and then can use another 15 days I think vacation/FMLA over the next year - so good for dr appointments, sick baby days etc. And honestly no, there is no one else. I guess we'll wait and see once we're in it - I'm getting a lot of mixed opinions that are equally strong and opposite.
@gingerbride26, 6 weeks of paternal leave is awesome! Personally, I would much rather have the three days of help in the hospital and only have 5 or 5.5 weeks of DHs help at home. I’m only 3 weeks post c-section and am 100% healed and operating as normal except for the lifting restriction. But that’s just my preference. It’s totally personal. Whatever works for you.
Something I’ve asked my medical team about (but they’ve only given me vague answers) is how long the swelling will last after a c-section. I know I will likely swell more than I have been (ugh, I am not looking forward to that), so I’m planning on wearing sandals to the procedure so my feet can fit into something on the way home.
For those who have had a c-section, when does the swelling go away?
@sm05-2 i don’t remember too much swelling in my legs and feet because they still make you walk and put on some nice massage things on your legs. I wore sandals and slippers during my stay but mainly for comfort.
@sm05-2 I didn’t really swell at all after my section. I think I counted at least 5 bags of fluids too so it wasn’t like they went easy on me in that department lol. I did make my DH help me put compression socks on as soon as I was out of recovery, which may have helped.
I didn't swell this time around. Also a warning about binders, I have been using the hospital one. it is definitely helpful but I think it has been making it difficult for my digestion to pick back up. my dr also said to really only wear it a week or it can weaken the abs and stomach muscles from strengthening again on their own
@lindsayleigh1989 that interesting. After DS i wore it on and off the first few weeks but i used it a bit more once i started to slowly work out. I felt more secure when running or any jump movement (like keeping my guts in because of the diastasis. The binder i had didn’t really fit at first anyways. It kinda makes sense like when you lose muscle and strength with a cast so probably not a good idea to use it for too many hours in a day.
With my first, my feet were so swollen that walking felt like I was being stabbed with little needles, and after 2 weeks of drinking large amounts of water, it was back to normal. I'm hoping with a planned c section this time around, the swelling will be less severe, and from what my doctor has indicated, my swelling was pretty extreme that first round and less common than most. My guess (and hope) is 2 weeks is a worse case scenario but that a planned c section will go more smoothly resulting in less discomfort, exhaustion, and pain overall.
I scheduled my c section for July 24th. Ish just got real. I am so nervous and can’t contain myself. Have you ladies scheduled your dates yet? How are you feeling about the date arriving soon?
@ssthomps i have mine scheduled for Friday and overall feeling ok about it for now. The spinal is what usually what makes me shiver. My DS was also scheduled and it went smoothly overall so I’m hoping this one will just be an even better recovery knowing what to expect. Ask all the questions you have and if your nervous maybe they’ll give you some happy meds to relax you.
Re: C-section check in and questions
@gingerbride26 I wonder if your husband could go down to recovery? That way he can be there why you wake up and be there with baby. I know in my case they just had my husband do skin to skin right away in my room while i was down in recovery.
UO/confession - totally half joked to a friend today "wonder if they can just do a tummy tuck while they're in there" lol
@TalesOfASocialIntrovert oh good that gives me hope!!
1. Are you definitely having a c-section, considering one, or more likely than average to need one? If already scheduled, when are you having it?
I was for sure having a c/s due to breech presentation, but baby turned. Now I have hypertension and most likely delivering at 37 weeks, which starts on Saturday for me.
2. Why are you having or possibly having a c-section?
Hypertension/AMA
4. How do you feel about having or potentially having a c-section?
I actually feel calmer about a c/s than a vaginal delivery. I was willing to try vagina delivery, but I've always preferred to get a c/s.
QUESTION:Do you guys have a csection recovery band or binder?? How soon can you put one on?
Its sounding like in-hospital alone is (while not ideal) doable and he'd be more helpful at home after so I'm not overdoing it - which I'm sooooo prone to without adult supervision.
My bff had an unplanned c-section in April and her husband wasn’t able to be at the hospital with her much unless it was in the evening and I wasn’t able to be with her hardly at all because I always have my kids and it’s against the rules to have non-siblings in rooms, and she lives across the country from family. Anyways. While she said it was fine to not have him there, she definitelt overdid it a little bit trying to take care of baby right after surgery alone. The nurses are helpful but can’t be with you 100% of the time.
Logically I would want more time with my H at home than I would in the hospital but I would be sad to be alone for several days (minus however long H came to visit) and have a hard time doing it all at the hospital.
I guess all I'm saying it do what works for you. If you need DH there, I'm sure your current LO would be fine with your MIL - even if it's not what your originally planned. And if DH is going to be a better support person at home, then do that. Go with your gut!
If he stays in the hospital with you, how much time would he still get off work and at home with you post-discharge?
Is there someone else that could come stay with you for at least the first day or two? Not during delivery itself, but when he goes back to work. By the time I was discharged I was moving around a lot better. There was a lot more pain and limited movement those first couple days in the hospital.
For those who have had a c-section, when does the swelling go away?