September 2018 Moms

STM/Toddler thread March

245

Re: STM/Toddler thread March

  • Well, I feel like I semi-started this whole thing because I asked a question in the randoms thread and people were kind enough to reply! Shame on all of you for being helpful and insightful!  ;)

    The bigger question is...my son doesn’t turn one until Friday. Am I allowed to post here since he’s technically “not quite” a toddler?! Where do I post?

     :D  :D:D
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  • @Wishilivedinflorida happy birthday to your son!  First birthdays are so much fun. Are you guys having a party?

    I think its it’s safe to say we welcome all in this thread. Even those without toddlers who just want a previews of toddler life :)
  • @nackie We are! Just a close family/friend thing (about 30 people, and that’s only part of DH’s huge Italian family). There are a few people who don’t know I’m KU again so we will completely reveal then. We have to, I’m definitely showing and into maternity clothes. I’m hoping DS doesn’t get freaked out and enjoys his cake!
  • nlc8424nlc8424 member
    edited March 2018
    @Wishilivedinflorida happy birthday to your DS because I'm sure I don't remember then! First birthday party is so fun! My DS loved his cake, hopefully yours will too. And yes, small for us was about 30 people as well.

    *spelling 
  • @Wishilivedinflorida get out of here with your baby talk!! Lol! 

    Happy birthday to your DD!! Mine just turned 1 in February. Isn't it awesome!? I hope the party goes well! 

    My DD didn't start consistently STTN until we weaned from breastmilk to formula, and then even more consistently when we switched to milk. Maybe it was a coincidence and she just mentally got there, but it was a noticeable difference.
  • arbell615arbell615 member
    edited March 2018
    @stothi and others who’ve replied: thank you. Sometimes it’s just good to hear I’m not alone. DD will be 3 in July. When she’s well rested and her routines are interrupted she’ll (usually) get a little upset and insist that we do it again. If she’s tired.....20 minutes of crying and freaking out can happen. Bath time has become a make or break it point many nights. (Sooo we don’t have bathtime as much as we probably should) I think I’ll reach out to our pediatrician just to see if we should be concerned/look into an early intervention eval. Working in the mental health field I’m super sensitive to signs of things...probably to my detriment. I’ll keep everyone posted once we hear from the pediatrician. 

    *Edited to add what the app cut off. 
  • And now my little has a fever, runny nose and is asleep on me (usually only one nap). Ugh hate when they don't feel good.
  • Despite having a 102.3 fever before bed last night and going to sleep an hour earlier than usual, my little STTN last night too. However, over thinking/protective mama did not. This is so typical of me lol. Guess I'll nap when he naps today (as if I don't do that already haha).
  • We also STTN last night!  And then woke up all wet after peeing through his diaper. One thing at a time I guess. 
  • After her up-constantly and not napping stint last week dd also went back to sttn, but is pretty much done w naps... which, I realize I’m fortunate they have lasted this long, but I’m not sure we can handle cutting them out, earlier bedtime to make up for it just doesn’t happen. So, lately it’s she sleeps till 7:30/8a, “rest/naps” 2:30/3:30-4:30/5/5:30, bed anytime between 10p-11p. It’s ridiculous, but it works for us, and we’ll probably end up homeschooling, so I don’t see it changing until DH has a job that allows him to be home before 7/8pm. 

    Mama needs her space, I’m not ready to lose those precious nap hours! 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    bfp#1-10/29/12,EDD: 7/3/13. nothing found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 12/10/12. "Bean"

    bfp#2-5/10/13! EDD: 1/18/14. "Peanut" Arrived 1/13/14. Diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis

    bfp#3- 9/26/14. EDD: 5/7/15. no heartbeat found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 10/23/14. "Little Bug"

    **Psalm 139:16**

  • Oh, sleep :confounded:

    DD had to be touching me or her dad in some way to get sleep and it suuuuuuucked. She ended up being in bed with us until just before she turned 4...and we still wake up with her in bed with us most mornings. I'm a bit worried about what's going to happen if this baby is a cuddler as well.

    There was a time from about her first birthday until 16 months where she would wake up screaming around 3 am. She was inconsolable and would just scream for 2 hours until she went back to sleep. 

    DD gave up naps at 19 months. I fucking mourned and nearly lost my shit every time someone would try to suggest I force the nap. Sorry, no, I'm not fighting my kid for an hour to maybe get a 20 minute nap. No.

    Oh and my family loves to tease us about DD's early bedtime. But seriously, no matter when you start bedtime it will take anywhere from 1.5 to 3 hours.

     Fun story, my mom kept her for a week so I could pack up our apartment. My mom got almost no sleep because she didn't follow my sleep instructions and then complained when DD wouldn't get to sleep until 1am but would still wake up at 7am.
  • @knitknitread I’m so sorry you lost nap so soon!! I have been giving dd a visual timer on the ipodtouch (out of reach) and she has to stay quiet on her bed for the first half hour, then she can look at books for another half hour, and I at least catch a break that way. Once upon a time, she took a 3 hr nap every day... it was magical. 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    bfp#1-10/29/12,EDD: 7/3/13. nothing found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 12/10/12. "Bean"

    bfp#2-5/10/13! EDD: 1/18/14. "Peanut" Arrived 1/13/14. Diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis

    bfp#3- 9/26/14. EDD: 5/7/15. no heartbeat found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 10/23/14. "Little Bug"

    **Psalm 139:16**

  • @jhjocelyn my son randomly has maybe 3 or 4 times taken a 3 hour nap. Omg! They are magical!  You actually have time to rest or eat and do something for yourself, maybe clean something or work on a project. I'm so sorry you lost naptime :'(
    One of my mom friends has a kid that goes to sleep at like 7:30/8:30pm, sleeps straight through the night, reliably, until 7/8am and then takes a 3-4 hour nap daily with no fuss. They seriously just put their child in bed, say night night and walk away. That's the whole process. And the child then sleeps. I asked them what all the do, did they sleep train, what techniques, all that. Nothing. Their kid just sleeps like that. They didn't do anything. I honestly can't even imagine what that feels like. Like, you could actually still have a life and like shower and clean your house and be like an actual human! And people would be willing to babysit overnight! When they want to go do stuff, people are always like, sure, we'll totally babysit for 4-5 days. No problem. There's only 2 people willing to babysit my child overnight and it has been declared that they can't do it more than 1 night by themselves because it's too exhausting. Whenever people tell me I should get a babysitter and go on a vacation cause that's what they do, I just laugh (sadly) to myself. Yeah. That's not really an option for me :/
  • @stothi **whispers: my kid is like that** now I’m going to run away before you all hate me forever. I’m fully anticipating a horrible sleeper for #2 since DS has been so amazing 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Pregnancy Ticker
  • Lcardinal04Lcardinal04 member
    edited March 2018
    @stothi @AdmiralKitty yeah that’s mine too... so I have been lurking and silently commiserating but as someone mentioned, I forget who, it is horrendous to have people with good sleepers give advice. Not that mine was always a good sleeper, she started sttn at 10 months, but still. 

    Im also fully anticipating number two being the opposite. 


  • @stothi **whispers: my kid is like that** now I’m going to run away before you all hate me forever. I’m fully anticipating a horrible sleeper for #2 since DS has been so amazing 
    Lol!!! I don't hate you, I just want my kids to sleep too! I want what you have :)  You never know, you might luck out with another good sleeper. I sure hope you do cause the whole baby that doesn't sleep thing is painful. I have no idea what to expect from this new baby. I'm super hopeful I'll get a better sleeper but most days I'm just filled with dread at the thought of another 2+ years without sleep.
  • chillmama1518chillmama1518 member
    edited March 2018
    @stothi **whispers: my kid is like that** now I’m going to run away before you all hate me forever. I’m fully anticipating a horrible sleeper for #2 since DS has been so amazing 
    We have one of these magical unicorn sleepers too. However, he was polar opposite for the first 14 months of his life. Like rocked him to sleep for every sleep, up 2-4 times at night and rocked him for nap and got like a 27 min nap out of him max. Then one day...bam. Sleeps through the night, just hug and kiss and tuck him under a blanket and he’s happily in bed for the night. And 2-3 hour naps most days. I am terrified of what number two will be like because those first 14 months were so very trying on this tired mama. 
  • Yeah, DS currently sleeps 8pm-8am and takes an hour long morning nap and a 1.5 hour afternoon nap. We did have to do some mild Ferberization with him when he was younger, and he didn’t night wean until 10 months (but did so on his own). Which is why I wondered if he will hardcore regress later...or if he will generally stay a good sleeper. Time will tell!

    @AdmiralKitty and @Lcardinal04 I’m also bracing myself for a poor sleeper this time. Lightening doesn’t strike twice, right?
  • So tell me more about transitioning...we aren’t moving soon and DD#2 has slept on her own since she was a newborn. She slept in RNp, then bassinet, and now PNP. When we move I really don’t want to feel like a shit parent and keep her in the PNP, and I’m thinking about getting her a bed, but do I want a twin bed or toddler bed? 


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    BFP#1: 11/15/2010 * Missed M/C 12/28 * D&C 12/29/2010
    BFP#2: 3/31/2011 * IT'S A GIRL! * Born 11/17/2011
    BFP#3 CP 11/15/2014 
    BFP#4 9/3/2015 * Team Green turned PINK * Born 05/16/2016
    BFP#5 12/26/2017 *SURPRISE* Due 09/02/2018
  • It took us 2.5 years to have a simple bedtime where DD will sleep through the night 90% of the time. We coslept (for survival, not by choice) for a long time, then about a year ago transitioned to a crib. That process involved playing upstairs, 3 books, and nursing or rocking to sleep, followed by ninja placing DD in her crib, covering with a blanket, and walking out slowly and silently. Typically followed by an upset toddler 2-3 hours later who came back to our bed for the rest of the night. It took a one week stay with my mom and suddenly it’s snuggle, goodnight! See ya in the morning! Here’s hoping a shift comes for so many moms still not getting any good sleep. It was a process for us. Mostly giving up and giving in until DD showed us (my mom) she was ready for less. The only thing that helped me keep my sanity was knowing that when DD woke up and we showed up to comfort her it reinforced that she was safe. (So many nights I just wanted to run away!! Anywhere quiet, with a bed I could have all to myself!!) The love and patience I see from everyone here is so beautiful, your kids are lucky to have mommas who care so much. 
  • @megnwingate we are doing a toddler bed for space reasons. If we had a bigger room for buddy chances are we'd go to a twin mattress on the floor and get him a bed frame closer to 4/5.
    We are also doing a toddler bed just because I like baby stuff. I'm not really ready to go to a true big boy bed. But that's just about me. If we had more space and I was in a mood to be more practical, we'd go straight to that twin.
  • @arbell615 you don't know how many nights when I was ready to lose it, I'd think, he'll only be this small for a short time, someday I'll wish I could solve his problems by hugging and rocking him, and like you said, my baby knows he is safe and loved so this is all worth it.
    I've also thought the same "he knows he is safe and loved," after giving comfort and deciding it's time for him to go back in his crib and for me to go back to my bed, whether or not he felt like he was ready to go back in the crib... That's usually after a really short check-in/comfort session at like 5am after the 3rd or 4th wake up.
    If he would actually sleep in my bed and not just go crazy, I guarantee I would have been bed sharing a long time ago.

  • @megnwingate does your DD fit well in the PNP still? I guess I wouldn't be in a huge rush to move out of that until every one is ready. What does your room space allow for? A twin/regular sized mattress has the advantage of not having to upgrade again later on down the road, but a toddler bed might be a little more confining which is what she's used to.

    So I'll admit that I haven't given a ton of thought to when DS is out of his crib where he will go. I'm irrationally sad about the thought of moving DS to another room that's slightly farther away because his baby2 should go in the one closest to us. We need to start giving this some good thought, along with cleaning out our guest bedroom and figuring out what we're going to do with closets since we have too many clothes and not enough storage for all of them. I'd love to feel productive on this part but right now it's just easiest to ignore it. 
  • We also HAD one of those unicorn sleepers until about two years of age. Placed DD 1 in her crib at 8pm and she would wake up around 8am plus a consistent 3 hour nap. Then around 2 years of age we moved her to her big girl bed when we moved houses. She still slept great for awhile until we had DD # 2 and then suddenly started waking up in the night and trying to come into our bed. We fought it for so long trying to put her back to bed in the middle of the night for so long sometimes taking hours, all while also getting up multiple times with a newborn that was a shitty sleeper. Eventually DD 2 became the magical unicorn sleeper, and DD 1 now comes in our bed consistently at 3 am and they both sleep until 8. It came to a point where sleep was so precious and absolutely not worth the fight at 3am just to get her to sleep in her bed for only a few more hours and sometimes less. 
  • @nlc8424 she sleeps great in her PNP now. We are currently living camper life right now and move into our house slowly over the next few weeks. I’m thinking about a toddler bed because the bedrooms are 11x11 and I think #2 & #3 will share a bedroom. #1 is going to be 7 in November and probably needs her space 


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    BFP#1: 11/15/2010 * Missed M/C 12/28 * D&C 12/29/2010
    BFP#2: 3/31/2011 * IT'S A GIRL! * Born 11/17/2011
    BFP#3 CP 11/15/2014 
    BFP#4 9/3/2015 * Team Green turned PINK * Born 05/16/2016
    BFP#5 12/26/2017 *SURPRISE* Due 09/02/2018
  • @megnwingate your call then. I know a lot of toddlers start pushing boundaries about staying in bed once they are in a toddler/regular bed and that can be a battle. You won't know until you try? My guy is constantly pushing his limits but is really good about our bedtime routine, so I still plan on keeping him in his crib as long as possible.
  • Oh, what was all that about my unicorn sleeper? Jk, he was up around 1030 screaming his head off and would only calm down on my chest for a good hour. Ibuprofen and even a bottle were offered. Ugh. I have a feeling teeth are the culprit. Oh, and DH has the nerve to complain as he remained in bed while I did the soothing, even though DS almost never does this. Then random whines happened all night that were *just* loud enough to wake us up every hour. 

    Fevers are so scary, @nlc8424. I’m glad to hear it broke!

    Benefit to 2u2...#twocribsforlyfe! Or, until DS learns to climb out....
    Good luck with the move, @megnwingate! I’m glad you’ll soon have more space!
  • megnwingate We went straight to a twin bed because I didn’t want to buy a second crib mattress when DS is born... but I feel like it is totally personal preference.

    DD has been ‘pushing the boundaries’ and getting out of her bed during the first part of her nap. She generally just looks at her books or plays quietly so that works for me. 

    Both DD and I came down with colds yesterday. Not being able to take much to treat the symptoms sure is sucking! We are just chilling out on the couch this morning and watching TV. Whatever. Lol! 

    Also... only like 1/2 of my previous post posted! So weird. All I really added at the end of that one was that I think that all of you that have tough sleepers are total rockstars. 
  • Dont worry. Little buddy will get a party someday! I really hate throwing parties but the first birthday comes with a big party expectation from both our families, so here we are. After that, it will likely be a special outing or immediate family gatherings only until DS is old enough to make requests. 

    All right, I’m leaving this thread until Friday, when my INFANT will magically start to toddle.  ;)
    Happy early birthday to your DS!!

    We're doing the same with birthdays. We did a big party for DS's first but will drop to immediate family only for now on. Since this LO will also have a September birthday DS may get a big third birthday party by default because we'll most likely throw #2 a big first birthday party and we're not going to ignore DS!

    Our invite list was immediately family plus grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and a few friends and hit 85 people!! Thankfully actual attendees ended up in the 40-50 range, but I am not inviting everyone every year!!
    _______________________________________________________________________________________________
    MMC 8/5/15 at 8 weeks
    DS born 9/13/16
    BFP 1/13/18 - EDD 9/20/18 - It's a boy!
  • @megnwingate Both my kids went from crib to twin-sized mattress on the floor for 1 year, until they didn't roll around. Then we bought them the bed frames/headboards. This worked out great.
  • @Wishilivedinflorida Obviously not a doctor, but MOTN waking screaming for us was 95% of the time an ear infection. 

    DD will be 18/19 months when this kiddo is born, and around 2 when we move new kid to the crib. I really, really do not want to buy a second crib. I'm hoping to do the mattress on the floor starting about 1-2 months before we need the crib...if DD doesn't adjust, we'll buy a second crib at that time. If she does, then I win. 
  • I got my son one at Walmart, it's probably their brand My Sweet Love I think? Super cute, eyes open and shut, and came with one of those bottles that "empties." I think she was $10, maybe $15? Size of maybe a 1 or 2 month old.
    _______________________________________________
    Me: 33
    DH: 32
    Married 7/18/15
    1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
    Team green turned BLUE!
    2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18 
    Team green turned PINK!
    Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Pregnancy Ticker
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