Bye Mamas - maybe next month

nerdeebird · March 2018

DH and I have only been trying for a few months and got our first ever BFP 9 days ago and confirmed with my doctor last Tuesday. But it looks like I had a chemical pregnancy. I started bleeding Friday and proceeded to have what seems to be much like a period....I took a pregnancy test yesterday and it was negative.... I know so many women here have gone through so much trying to get pregnant and have had such great losses and that chemical pregnancies are so so common so I don't want to compare what I'm going through to what so many of you awesome ladies have been dealing with. But it was still really hard to have all the excitement I've been feeling this past week be dashed. In just a short time I had grown so attached to this pregnancy... I kind of feel a little silly now. I really still can't fully believe this happened. I think we're going to try right away again and I am going to try and keep my spirits high. Maybe I'll be able to join the Dec 2018 ladies.

Anyways, I've really enjoyed feeling apart of this community, even if for just a short time. If anyone has any words of encouragement for conceiving short after a chemical I really appreciate it! I have a really complicated graduate school schedule so we might have to take a break for a while if it doesn't work out this next cycle (which also made this last one not sticking all the harder to cope with...).

I hope you all have happy healthy pregnancies!

sarcaztic1016 · March 2018

I am so sorry for your loss. Don’t feel silly or like you shouldn’t feel any grief. Feel what you need to feel. CP’s are still losses and you can mourn the loss in any way and however long you need to. Sending hugs.

lifesabeach85 · March 2018

I’m so sorry for your loss. It is tough no matter when it happens. I hope you are able to come back soon!

thebobloblaw · March 2018

Very sorry for your loss, it is hard at any stage so don’t be hard on yourself

vrj0522 · March 2018

I am so sorry for your loss. You don't need to discount it, it's still a loss and painful and you don't need to be afraid of embracing that fact. Best wishes for the future.

offtoneverland · March 2018

I'm so very sorry for your loss. I do understand what you're saying about feeling "silly" about being so sad after a CP, as I felt that way too after my CPs. But a loss is a loss no matter how big the baby is, and it's devastating to have your hopes and dreams disappear in an instant. It's okay to feel sad and angry. Cry and yell at the world; whatever you're feeling is normal. Take time to grieve and do whatever you need to do. I have my fingers crossed that you'll get your sticky little bean soon.

KristoKekerooni · March 2018

Speaking as someone who has had way too many losses, don't try to compare things, darling. A loss is a loss, and it stings all the same. It's really important to remember you aren't just grieving the loss of a little poppyseed, you are grieving the loss of an entire future, and that shit sucks no matter how quickly it happened. Be kind to yourself.

pelorunningmama · March 2018

I am so very sorry. Please don't discount your loss. It is ok to feel sad and upset. Hugs!

mockingjay1 · March 2018

I am so sorry for your loss. I agree with PPs, don't feel like your loss is any less than anyone else's because it was a CP. It's still devastating to lose that future your were planning with a little one. Take the time to grieve and try and take care of yourself. Hoping you get your rainbow baby soon.

linz36 · March 2018

I am so sorry for your loss. Don't feel silly for growing attached too soon; you can never predict what is going to happen. I'm sending you hugs and positive vibes.

gingersnap-mama · March 2018

I am so sorry, hoping December is your month ❤️

suzycupcake · March 2018

@ecologyphdmama So sorry for your loss. Please come over to the ttgp group. There is a ttcal thread with many wonderful ladies supporting each other. Please take the time to take care of yourself. I know for me, I thought I was fine, but the hormone whack afterward (a week later; did not expect it or know it was coming) was enough to sit me down and feel sad about it. Don't be surprised if you feel not like yourself and ask YH or whomever to remind you that it will take some time to feel balanced again. Hugs

runningmom5 · March 2018

I, too am going through a chemical pregnancy. This is my second one in a row. I started bleeding today after my lines were getting lighter and lighter. I had a feeling from the beginning with both of them so I really do believe that women's intuition is very real! I hope we both have successful pregnancies in the near future and that everyone in the group has healthy pregnancies!

kecoff01 · March 2018

@ecologyphdmama and @Janie585 - so sorry for your losses. Hugs and hopes for December babies for you both.

nerdeebird · March 2018

Thank you all for your kind words of encouragement ladies. It really means so much to me. It's good to know that it's ok to feel the way I am feeling and that I'm not alone.

@Janie585 so sorry to hear about your back to back CPs... I wish I could say I had a feeling...but I really felt blindsided when it happened...and even was in denial hoping it was this "normal" spotting thing I hear about *sigh* hopefully we both get sticky babies soon!

suzycupcake thank you for the kind welcome to the TTC group! I've been mostly lurking but trying to engage that last couple days. your posts are so encouraging and always make me feel uplifted!

@KristoKekerooni I feel like you really nailed it...there is a definite grieving of the pregnancy itself but there is also so much grief around all the hopes and dreams and excitement for the future...

shastasky · March 2018

I am sorry for your loss, friend. This is a pain I have known. There is no measure on a loss when wanting a baby; the heart feels deeply. Don't minimize your CP loss, it's equally terrible. You are right on par with your feelings right now.

Don't give up! Pregnancy happens when you aren't looking. Best wishes.

patriciahomol · March 2018

Im so sorry for your loss and completely understand how you feel. I had a CP as well. Its hard having to grieve alone.

MommaEm3 · March 2018

I had a cp last month and got a positive this month, so don't give up. It can happen. Good luck

onechoctawgirl · March 2018

I had a CP in December, followed by another in Jan, then got pregnant the very next cycle for third time and it seems to be sticking. It definitely can happen. And I know exactly what you mean about feeling so attached so soon! It’s amazing how fast it can happen! I feel for you. Hang in there!

runningmom5 · March 2018

@onechoctawgirl I had a CP in Feb and now going through it again. My doctor says there is no need to wait to start trying again since she truly believes the back to backs was just really bad luck. I am going to try again when this one is all over. Congratulations on your pregnancy. Did you do anything different this time around?

nerdeebird · March 2018

@shastaskythank you for your kind words

@patriciahomolI'm sorry to hear you also had a CP. FX for our healthy happy pregnancies soon.

@MommaEm3 and @onechoctawgirl glad to hear you both were able to conceive soon after a CP. Hopefully that happens for me as well!

Bye Mamas - maybe next month

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