Pregnant after IF

2nd Trimester Check in - week of Feb 12

edited February 2018 in Pregnant after IF
How's everyone feeling this week?

How far along?
Appts this coming week?
Don't forget HDBD on Wednesday!

Mommies to be:

@ReesaAnne16 EDD 5/15 GIRL!

@Hopeful_mom EDD 6/6 

@FuzzyDust EDD 6/8 BOY!

@Holls214 EDD 6/14 BOY!

@TravelingCouple EDD 6/19 GIRL!

@Aera11 6/21

@mtpbadger EDD 7/4?

@coco305 EDD 7/14

@jr102217 EDD 7/15

@cseley321 EDD 7/22 GIRL!

@safire3 EDD 7/23 BOY!

@irisheyes81 EDD 8/4 GIRL!

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Re: 2nd Trimester Check in - week of Feb 12

  • Happy Monday!! I can’t belive I’ll be 20 weeks on Wednesday!! I have my fetal echocardiogram Thursday and just a telephone appt with my OB to follow up from my MFM last week. I was supposed to have an appt today but she didn’t think it was necessary to see me since the MFM did everything she would have done, which I appreciate - get to save a few hours of leave!

    Will also be having our gender reveal on Saturday!! Lately I’ve been thinking it’s a girl, can’t wait to find out! Little one was moving and grooving yesterday which is always reassuring! 

    Anyone have plans for Valentine’s Day? We don’t usually do anything since my bday is the 15th - we’ll go out to dinner Friday night for that. My poor DH. His moms bday is the 13th, valentines day and then my bday. Thankfully this little babe won’t have a bday around too many others in our family!
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  • @irisheyes81 welcome, nice to see a familiar face from Nov FET!

    AFM, I am 17 weeks now and still feeling fine. I am a STM but carry far back so I just look bloated still. Can't wait until I actually look pregnant instead of just looking like I just ate a huge dinner!

    I have an appointment this week, but no US or anything fun
  • So exciting about your gender reveal and fetal echo @mtpbadger!!  Let us know how both go :)  I have my echo the end of the month and am looking forward to seeing baby again.

    Welcome @Irisheyes81!  RLP is the worst, especially when it catches you off guard.  

    AFM, 22 weeks on Thursday.  We did a little social media announcement yesterday...that made everything feel so real.  I was so against it because of PGAL-brain but I think doing it is forcing me to have a positive outlook and that I will get to hold a baby in a few months.  Infertility and loss really mess with your head. 

    I had a check up tomorrow but nothing special, just a regular one.

    I think we'll go to dinner or get carry out, nothing crazy for valentine's day.  DH leaves on Friday for a wedding in Arizona and then I'll be in San Diego the next week for my sisters bachelorette party, so keeping it low key this year.


  • @mtpbadger Woohoo almost halfway! I'm excited for you to find out :) I never would've thought to have a gender reveal if my friend hadn't asked me if she could throw us one..and I'm so glad we did! It was so fun and special. Have fun at yours!!

    Welcome @Irisheyes81 congrats on your baby girl!

    @cseley321 I think I just recently started popping more and I'm a STM too. It looked like bloat for a while. I'm carrying so differently this time around than with my DS though! It's so funny.

    @Aera11 Yay for it feeling more real! 

    AFM, 22 weeks tomorrow. I had my follow up U/S today because they couldn't get all the measurements they needed during my anatomy scan since baby girl wouldn't flip over. She was in the correct positioning that they needed this morning so I'm all set with that! She confirmed that it's definitely a girl and I got to see the little girl parts this time. I saw her two little feet too, and her hands were behind her head. So adorable. I can't wait to smother her in kisses!

    We don't really celebrate Valentine's Day that much. If anything, we'll have a nice dinner at home.

  • *lurking bc I'm excited to join you all here next week!

    @Irisheyes81 Hi!  So great to see you here.  Congrats on the baby girl!
    History and blog link in spoiler
    2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 
    2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
    moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
    Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP!  baby boy born 8/22/18

    May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
    Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
    May 2020 FET; BFN
    July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
    Oct 2020 BFP! 

    Take a look at my blog


  • @laurad75 Ahhh, YAY for 2nd tri next week!

  • @laurad75 Great to see you! How are you feeling? Congrats to YOU 

    @travelingcouple I bet it was so much fun to get the anatomy scan and then another 'bonus' ultrasound.  She sounds totally adorable. 

    @Aera11 Congrats on the announcement. I bet there was some anxiety about that but how fun! How did you do it? 

    @cseley321 It's great to see you! It's so hard to be in the awkward stage of growth. I always wonder if people think I'm just eating too much cake or something. 
    • Me: 36 DH: 33
    • TTC since June 2016
    • Me: PCOS DH: Morphology 1%
    • 3 TI with Famera and trigger shots-BFN
    • 3 IUI's with Famera and trigger shots- BFN
    • IVF August 2017 25 eggs retrieved, 19 mature, 13 fertilized (ICSI), 5 frozen, 3 PGS normal 
    • FET November 2017 Transferred one 6 day blast (a little GIRL) BFP EDD 8/4/18

  • jr102217jr102217 member
    edited February 2018
    How's everyone feeling this week? Ok, but weird -- I don't know how to describe it, but I think I'm just anxious about how the baby is when I can't feel anything happening. Pretty sure now that all those aches and pains were actually round ligament pain instead of flutters or baby movement. =/ 
    Also, I started a couple baby registries so this is starting to feel real (and expensive LOL). However, while everyone says "let me know when you have a shower or where you're registered", no one's asked to host a shower for me and the baby. Not sure if all my girlfriends think another girlfriend will do it. Anyways, if it comes to it, I'll ask my mom to host a big one -- is that okay shower etiquette for the grandma-to-be to host a shower?
    How far along? 18w1d
    Appts this coming week? YES! Follow-up OB appointment is tomorrow. Finally get to hear the heartbeat again after 4 weeks. Then we have the anatomy scan on Thursday, so this is a full week! I'm not bringing DH with me to my OB appt but I scheduled our anatomy scan on Thursday after his workday so he can definitely be there. 

    mtpbadger Happy early birthday and have fun at your gender reveal! We don't have plans for Valentine's Day. I used to work in a restaurant so I know it's the busiest day of the year, aside from Mother's Day, so I avoid going out to eat on or around Valentine's Day. LOL That said, DH's birthday is in a few weeks so we'll probably go out then, nothing too fancy though because we need to save money for my medical leave. 

    Welcome, @Irisheyes81

    Aera11 congrats on the social media post. It took me a long time to agree to making one and it was like a sigh of relief afterwards, especially to read positive and encouraging comments. I hope you felt encouraged too!

    @T
    ravelingCouple glad your u/s appt went well! Very exciting!

  • @TravelingCouple thanks for keeping us going here!!  Glad you go to see the baby again and all is great - we cant ask for more!

    @mtpbadger happy 1/2 way how exciting!!  Glad things sound calm and hope they stay that way!  Hope your family, I believe your dad is doing better too!!  Have so much fun at your gender reveal you'll have to share how it goes down - enjoy the moment!!  You've been through so much to get here and I'm so happy you get to enjoy this journey...enjoy meaning carrying the baby knowing your prior struggle ;)

    @irisheyes81 hey lady welcome!  SO nice to see you here!!  Trust me I was scared to join or say anything about my pregnancy...still sharing the news slowly with friends as they see me...I'm a ball of nerves.  Glad you're here!  Congrats on your princess too :)

    @aera11 awww you bit the bullet yay took the big social media plunge!  How did you do it.  I don't think I'll even get that brave!  You really have a lot going on so enjoy the down time you will have.  I have a party for a friend next weekend and I have no desire to go and its a car ride away I can't even imagine having to get on a plane for it!

    @laurad75 we'll be ready with open arms :)  I like the fruits you have there for the size of the baby...mine was never a peach.  I'm more the size of an ear of corn...even though I don't really think that's accurate either ;)

    @jr102217 I have to say the first time I felt a lil kick was more 18/19 weeks so I have a feeling once you really feel one you'll know it.  I first feel flutters now when its they baby is turning or doing the samba :)  I was up one night all night waiting for the baby to move.  Its just with what we've been through we are always a bit more paranoid!  I can't say what will make you feel better as I'm still trying to figure it out!

    @cseley321 i'm laughing about eating make u look bigger as I look like I'm a month farther along after I eat.  In the morning I look chubby but give me some food and its like pow!!  This week I feel like my thighs are even bigger SML!!  Not where I need it to be!

    AFM:  Will be 24 weeks on wed woohoo.  Headed to MFM on wed where I believe its more measuring the anatomy and getting the results of the baby's echo...so praying all still looks as it should!!  I find it hard to sleep through the night besides having to get up to go to the bathroom my hips hurt after an hour or so and I have to flip over.  I'm already sleeping on pillows so not sure what else I could really do.   


    History of TTC in spoiler box
    TTC since 2014
    Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30
    7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN 
    IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle :( RE thought I would get at least 10.
    IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN
    IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F,  3DT)-BFP  with TWINS // MC both at almost 10wks  :'( 
    IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP  (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal  :'( 
    IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!! :)
    IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!! :)
    IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!

  • @mtpbadger enjoy the reveal and birthday!
    @Irisheyes81 yay!! You're here!! We all had the same fears - don't worry, you're in good company!
    @cseley321 I must carry far back too. I just have a muffin top. Still wearing my regular jeans & my flowy tops. 
    @jr102217  I'm in the same boat shower-wise. No ones offered, I know my mom can't handle giving one, and honestly, not sure if I want one :/ I'm quite ok, staying low-key. But I have started a registry :) 
    @TravelingCouple  yay for a good scan. 
    @Aera11
    I think we're the only board hesitant about social media announcements. But I'm glad you were able to do it and glad it helped make it real! 

    Afm: 18+2, no appt until 20wks. Right now hubby is congested and he just took his temp and it's almost 99. So I sent him to urgent care for a flu test. Fingers crossed it's just a dumb cold and that I'm just super paranoid
  • I was briefly on the first trimester check in when I first go pregnant but have had a hard time staying on as much so I just have been lurking, following all you ladies :) Thought I'd try and jump back in! 

    How far along? 22 weeks, 5 days (CRAZY?!) 
    Appts this coming week? Yes I have my first appointment with a perinatologist on Thursday. At our 20 week scan they measured one of my little man's tubes running from one of his kidneys (real scientific terms, I know) as a millimeter bigger than the other and so it put it just outside the normal range. My doctor isn't worried about it at all and said it usually resolves itself, if not by the next utlrasound, then by the time they're born and doesn't sound like there's real complications, just not in the "normal" range. So they're doing a level 2 ultrasound, I think remeasuring everything we did during the 20 week. As long as my little man is ok (since it seems to be such a small thing), I'm just excited i get to see him again :) Then another appointment next week with my ob. 

    We're finalizing our registry which is mind blowing. I still can't believe that we are here! (And I know you ladies get that). One of my closest friends here is pregnant, 3.5 weeks behind me (naturally and happend the first time they weren't trying not to be) and just found out they're having a boy too! It's been a blessing and a challenge sharing this time with her. I love having someone who can relate and to go through this with but it is hard to have comments made about "something in the water" around here due to us being due at the same time. IF made something that I'd want to be special anyways something that is even more special and it's hard when people don't understand the lengths it took. 

    I think I'm on a different page than some of you ladies because the lack of IF facebook posts is what made me feel the most alone. I haven't done a great job but I've been trying to be open about our journey and think I might do a post this week detailing our IVF journey. I waiting until I was almost 16 weeks to post about our pregnancy and haven't posted much else so I am with you on being terrified of saying anything before it felt a little more secure!

    Me & DH: 28  |  TTC since May 2016  |  DH: Morphology 0%  |  2 IUI's with Clomid - BFN  |  IVF ICSI Sept. 2017
  • @travelingcouple same here! When we told one of our good friends, that's the first thing out of her mouth "Can I do a gender reveal!?" So we went with it! We aren't telling family until the following week though. It's my dad's 70th bday on the 24th so DH and I are flying home to surprise him (my sister is the only one that knows we are coming) and are going to have my nephew walk in ahead of us with a balloon that says "it's a girl/boy". 

    @hopeful_mom I hear you on the sleep! I toss and turn all night and wake up with sore hips from laying on them. I now build a little fort of pillows around me and that seems to help at least a little bit. I'm sure it's only going to get worse! 

    @cseley321 I hate that inbetween! I feel like I'm starting to look more pregnant but I'm still not out at work so having to get creative to hide it and really hoping it just looks like I've gained a few pounds. 

    Thank you all for the early bday wishes and concern about my dad! He's home from the hospital and doing well - on dialysis for the foreseeable future but he's a trooper! I'm really excited to see him next weekend and let him know if he's gonna get another grandson or granddaughter! 
  • Didn’t make it here until the weekend last week so I just lurked lol. I have been doing more or less ok. I was referred to a Pulmonologist and cardiology because I’ve been having some palpitations and feeling like my heart is racing for no reason. I kind of thought that was normal pregnancy but I think they wan to be extra cautious because I have other health issues.

    Baby is definitely giving me some little nudges every now and then which I love (17+1 today). Next appointment is not until March 6th now for anatomy scan.

    It interesting that you guys are talking about social media since I’m in a tough spot today. My husband really wants to announce tomorrow on Facebook. He is the most optimistic person I know so I don’t even think it occurs to him that something could still go wrong at this point. My mom is against a Facebook announcement. She is very superstitious and thinks that putting it out there can invite jealously and bad wishes from other people. She also told us she would tell some of my family who live close to her ‘when the time is right’ and she still hasn’t told them (they live in another country so I don’t see them often). I think they would be upset finding out via Facebook. I personally don’t care much about a Facebook announcement but I don’t want to hide my pregnancy either. People are already asking questions based on pictures where I didn’t even think I looked pregnant and we will be attending a big weeding in 3 weeks and I’m sure there will be lots of pictures of me online with an obvious belly. Not really sure what to do. Don’t want either one to think I’m siding with the other over them. 

    TB ate my responses twice already so I’ll just split up this post...

  • @mtpbadger Happy birthday in advance and congrats on hitting the half way mark! Can’t wait to hear what you are having!
    DH and I went out to dinner on the weekend. Don’t want to deal with the Vday crowds tomorrow. 

    @Irisheyes81 awesome to have you here! 

    @Aera11 Im glad you’re feeling positive after your announcement. It gives me hope lol! I keep trying to remind myself that every day I get to carry this baby is a miracle and I should try to enjoy it!

    @TravelingCouple yay to getting to see baby girl again even if due to her stubbornness lol. 

    @laurad75 yay to second tri next week! Can’t wait for you to join us!

    @jr102217 I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the grandmother hosting the shower. I may even do mine myself since all of my close friends live far away. 2 friends have offered to host it but they can only be here when I’m 36 weeks which is way too late for me. 

    @Hopeful_mom congrats on hitting viability!! I’m nowhere near you and I’m already having the same sleep issue. I can’t sleep on my back or belly of course but on my side my hips start feeling sore within 2 hours and I have to turn around. I end up tossing and turning all night instead of sleeping. I just ordered a body pillow in the hopes that it will help. 

    @coco305 I hope your H feels better soon and it’s not the flu!

    @loverin great to have you here. What you describe sounds like mild hydronephrosis which is very common and usually resolves by itself just like you said. Plus it’s awesome to get to see him again! 
    You are completely right about the lack of IF Facebook posts. I would like to do something similar eventually but maybe after baby is born. 
  • cseley321cseley321 member
    edited February 2018
    Regarding the baby shower, when a friend asks when it is, just respond with something along the lines of letting her know that no one has offered to throw it yet. Word may get around

    I don't see any problem with mentioning it to your mom if you think she may want to host it. 
  • My DH is actually helping with the planning of my baby shower. I really don't want my mother in law to throw one and no friends have stepped up and all of my family lives out of town, but when he contacted a few friends, they said they were willing to help. So I made the suggestion that while he plans the majority of it, to have their names on the invite and maybe have them receive the RSVPs. My mom threw my sister one when she was pregnant so i don't think that's tacky at all!

    OMG, I haven't even started to think about a registry! I better get on that, huh? 
  • Hi Ladies,

     I feel like I can take a breath now and join the 2nd trimester club. 

    I’m 14w+2d, EDD 8/12/18.  Just came back from the doctor this afternoon and so relieved to hear that little baby heartbeat.  I’m still not quite convinced this is all real.

    @mtpbadget we are keeping it low key for valentines day.  We are going out to a little local woodfire pizza place.  Normally I love them for their excellent cocktails, this year I think I’ll be ordering a Shirley temple!  Happy almost birthday.

    @Irisheyes81 so good to see you!  I can related to the superstitious thing I’ve wanted to keep everything underwraps in real life the boards have been just about my only release to talk about it.  I’m going to share with friends later this week/weekend and extended family and still so nervous to spread any word.

    @jr102217 I think its fine for a mom to host the shower.  I read in etiquette books it’s a no go but I have been to several showers that have been hosted by the mom or mother-in-law and I never thought anything of it.  I would say if your mom wants to host go for it!  A baby is a celebration and I would say whoever wants to throw a party should throw a party!

    @aera11 congrats on your social media announcement I think that’s going to be a big hurdle for me to get over too. 

    @coco305 the flu is no joke this year.  Keep yourself healthy and hope he feels better. 

    @loverin I have a friend due less 1.5 weeks before I am.  They also got pregnant on the first try I actually haven’t told her I’m pregnant yet.  It’s just frustrating that I spend so much time in worry mode and she’s doing facebook announcements at 6 weeks, 6weeks?!? It was the day she peed on the stick...  Ignorance really is bliss.  To be fair she isn’t a super close friend and so she doesn’t know what we went through but it’s hard to see the contrast up close in real time.



    Me:38 DW:33 
    TTC History in Spoiler ***Trigger Warning*** Losses/Child Mentioned 
    Dx: My wife has no sperm  :D and apparently my embryos aren't as good as they look
    2016

     * April IUI#1 - BFN
     * June IUI#2 - BFN
     * July IUI#3 - CP  :'(
     * Sept IVF#1 - 4 Retrieved & Mature, 4 Blasts.  Fresh Transfer 1  - CP  :'(
     * November FET #1 - Transferred 1 Blast - CP  :'(
    2017 Switched REs - Recurrent loss testing for me - all normal, remaining 2 frosties sent for PGS - both abnormal
     * April/May IVF#2:  9 retrieved, 8 mature, 7 fertilized, 7 blasts!  Sent for testing - 2PGS Normals (0 remaining)
     * November IVF #3 12R, 8M, 6F, 4 blasts! - All 4 PGS normal!
     * November FET# 2 (Transfer a PGS normal from IVF#2) - BFP!!!
    2018 DD born 8/20/18
    2019 5PGS frosties ( 4 remaining)
      * September FET#3 (1PGS normal) - Beta#1: 139.7  Beta#2: 322.6

  • @2MomsHoping welcome to 2nd tri congrats!!
    @safire3 hey chica!  u know I couldn't remember if 24 or 27 is viability week...well its after midnight so I am 24 wks woohoo!!!  Of course i've been having these strange pains in my tummy on the right low down all day...of course panicking s i'm happy i'll be at the dr in a few hrs.
    I give anyone all the credit in the world doing the whole social media thing - i just can't do it!
    Last week I posted going to a cardiologist myself as I just felt as if I'm breathing for someone ready to give birth rather then someone 1/2 way there, through this process we can never be too careful...an extra check up is always good!
    @mtpbadger I give you credit for flying anywhere - I just can't do it...I'm terrified of just taking a long car ride.  You're surprise sounds so fun I hope someone will have the video ready to go!! 
    I also sleep on a bunch of pillows so I'm kind of at a loss of what to try next.  As for your shower that sounds like a great idea adding friends names!  No pressure for anyone!!

    Is there really shower etiquette?  Girls we have worked so HARD to get here, whatever you desire go for it!!

    @coco305 glad things are good - really hoping hubby doesn't have the flu and its just a bad cold that he heals quickly from!!

    @loverin HEY LADY!!!  good to see you here!!!  Yay on your prince!  Scary there are things to watch but hoping as you go things do resolve on its own!! Are you having singleton or twins...maybe the way I was reading your update I wasn't sure...either way such a blessing!! 
    You know you are correct about the lack of IF post on social media in my neck of the woods as well...probably why I have no desire to share my news....I'm so scared all the time and getting here was so hard people won't get it.  I have maybe 2 friends that had issues that I can talk too but many others it was just like poof!!!  I do have some pregnant people around me and it was a whoops for one, and the other literally was like I want to get pregnant in May and literally it happened the first month she tried.  Its hard cause she does whatever she wants nothing with restrictions.  Shes sick as a dog and will go workout at the gym...which its great that shes so blissfully happy and everything is so easy going.  I had spotting early on so for me walking is as much as I will do and I try to not over do that either.  She just doesn't get it.

    History of TTC in spoiler box
    TTC since 2014
    Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30
    7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN 
    IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle :( RE thought I would get at least 10.
    IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN
    IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F,  3DT)-BFP  with TWINS // MC both at almost 10wks  :'( 
    IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP  (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal  :'( 
    IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!! :)
    IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!! :)
    IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!

  • @jr102217 I was almost to the point of hosting my own. I have no family in the area but have had many people asking when one was happening, just no one had offered. I didn't like the idea but i also didn't want to miss out on that experience with my friends here and wouldve regretted more not having one. Do your own thing, I don't think 95% of people would think twice! 

    @mtpbadger We just started ours 2 weeks ago! It's overwhelming so we've taken our time with it. 

    @safire3 They didn't name our issue so THANK YOU for that! I'd wanted to look into it just a little bit but could only describe it lol I get why people don't say anything about IF on social media, absolutely no judgment for that because IF sucks and putting it out there for ignorant people to comment on is hard. We had a conversation with a couple right after we announced that we'd just met where they asked if we knew it was coming. We explained we'd done IVF so yes, it was planned. The guy proceeded to tell us about how they started trying and he had a young friend pass away who left only his wife. They'd intentionally not had kids but this guy then proceeded to tell me and my husband that seeing this widow made him realize how awful it would be to not be able to have kids and a legacy in them and then started worrying about whether or not they'd have trouble. When he got home his wife was pregnant :angry: My husband and I were baffled that after telling you we had to go through reproductive medicine to have kids (which means we likely wouldn't be able to have kids on our own otherwise) that you'd share how horrible those 2 minutes in your life were when you thought about our 2 year reality. Seeing that reaction made me question if I even wanted to open myself up to people like that but it's people like that that make going THROUGH IF and being in the process that much harder. I want to prevent that for any other girl if I can or at least make people think before they open their mouths. 

    @2MomsHoping it didn't feel real to me until 18 weeks. That's when I started getting a noticeable bump and he started moving around the same time. Until then it was a constant game of reminding myself that I'm really pregnant! My pregnant friend knows all that we went through to get here and has been super gracious this whole time. It really is such a blessing that she's behind me, it would've been super hard if she was ahead of me. This way I get to kind of do everything first and experience it as if I'm the only one for a little bit before she does (as selfish as that sounds). She also had spotting and some scares in the first trimester, where as I didn't, so I think she's kept it more to herself than she would have otherwise. It's less hard with her understanding but more just a frustration that everyone else thinks that we planned this or it was just so easy. Getting tied into someone who didn't have to struggle means that our struggle feels a little forgotten, even if no one intends for that to be the case. Even being pregnant I still struggle with the anxiety that came with IF and people minimizing the risks and leaps we took in hopes of having this baby by joking about pregnancy "being contagious around here" don't help(even people who know that we had to do IVF!). 

    @hopeful_mom hey mama! I haven't seen, do you know what you're having? I've been having the same sleep issues that you described, super tired but can't stay comfortable long enough to sleep well. 

    It's just my little boy, we transferred 2 but only 1 took! 

    Yeah social media is tough, especially when people don't understand. I was scared enough in the first trimester and I didn't really have anything happen, i can't imagine how much worse it'd be with spotting. I'm sorry that's added to your stress and worry! How're you feeling this far along? 


    Me & DH: 28  |  TTC since May 2016  |  DH: Morphology 0%  |  2 IUI's with Clomid - BFN  |  IVF ICSI Sept. 2017
  • Aera11Aera11 member
    edited February 2018
    thanks everyone!  @Irisheyes81 & @hopeful_mom I'll post the pic when I am back on my phone :) 

    @jr102217 I did, everyone was super positive/excited!  

    @safire3 same!  I saw my ob yesterday and I told her I finally feel like I might actually get to meet this baby!  She was like, "yes, you will!"  I think accepting that that is the end result and not something else has been the hardest.  I am still nervous to buy anything large (crib, car seat, etc) or start a nursery.  In my head I am always like 'what if'.  

    welcome to the second tri @2MomsHoping!  and so glad you got to hear the heartbeat, it's always a huge relief.  And it was a huge hurdle.  I didn't think it was exactly necessary to share for the sake of sharing but more so that I wanted control over my news and I have a lot of upcoming events for my sisters wedding where I'll be in pictures, so it felt like a good time to share.

    *eta
  • loverin I have a friend that is due a week after me and I completely relate to you! This is her second child and they didn't struggle at all with infertility.  I went out to lunch with her about a week after I found out I was pregnant. We are very close friends so I told her the transfer worked.  She had NO idea how difficult it was for me and said she went off the pill.  She was pregnant too.  It's just mind blowing how different it is after all we go through.

    @hopeful_mom Happy 24 weeks! That is so exciting.  I remember your pregnancy announcement.  Time flies even though it feels like it’s standing still.  Have an awesome ultrasound today and fingers crossed for the echo.  Maybe a specific pregnancy pillow will help your hips.  That is miserable. I am SUCH a stomach sleeper and since about 12 weeks, sleeping on my stomach makes me have to pee.  I use a pillow to prevent me from rolling and then needing to get up a lot. 

    @mtpbadger Hey! I used to internet stalk your story so much! So glad to see you! What an adorable idea for a gender reveal. Happy Birthday!! So glad your dad is doing well  

    @coco305 great to see you! 18 weeks! moving along.  J I hope your husband doesn’t have the flu!!

    @cseley321 I am only 15 weeks but I still look like I ate too much.  I don’t know about carrying in the back but my love handles are REAL.

    @aera11 have people been giving you unsolicited advice since your announcement.  I told a distant relative and he asked if I was having a home birth.  I replied that I haven’t discussed that with my doctor or husband yet but he would be the FIRST to know once I did.  Insert eye roll.

    @coco305 and @jr102217 I bet you get a lot of stuff even without a shower so it’s great you did a registry. I don’t think there are any rules about who throws a shower. 

    @safire3 how exciting you are feeling movement! So many people have mixed feelings about posting on social media.  I am not going to just because I have a lot of infertility friends who really don’t need to see ANOTHER pregnancy announcement.  I don’t post much though so it hasn’t been hard.

    @2momshoping HI! Great to see you! Congrats on 14 weeks and being able to start sharing and getting more excited.  I’m so glad you decided to join this board. How fun that you heard the heartbeat today. I wish every day was ultrasound day.

    • Me: 36 DH: 33
    • TTC since June 2016
    • Me: PCOS DH: Morphology 1%
    • 3 TI with Famera and trigger shots-BFN
    • 3 IUI's with Famera and trigger shots- BFN
    • IVF August 2017 25 eggs retrieved, 19 mature, 13 fertilized (ICSI), 5 frozen, 3 PGS normal 
    • FET November 2017 Transferred one 6 day blast (a little GIRL) BFP EDD 8/4/18

  • Oh man @Irisheyes81, I always had snarky responses when people would ask us about having kids.  Like mind your own damn business.  So far it's been okay.  DH mom asked us about names & we said we weren't sharing any & reakkybdidny have anything concrete yet, but she responded "just send me a list when you do".  Lady, did you not hear us just say we wouldn't be sharing?  I also had one of DH good friends EX- girlfriend text me, which I've ignored so far...is that rude?  I would've been polite & responded but she felt the need to say to she knew for a while & didnt know if it was 'common knowledge yet'.  
  • Wow lots going on this week. Welcome new ladies and congrats on the second trimester. We have also been asked a ton about names. Yes we have a list and mind your own business people haha. We don’t want your input on names... ;) 
    My best friend is planning my shower it’s actuallt next weekend which is super early but the only time my Mom will be in town from Arizona. It’s going to be small as not a lot of people can make it I guess. Oh well. 
    Had a check up today and have to get my cervix remeasured as it’s smaller than it should be so they are worried about early labor argh. They wanna see how much smaller it really is and make sure it’s accurately measured too. Then in 2 weeks I get the diabetes test. 
    I feel you all on sleeping. It’s gotten harder being 23 weeks and is only going to get harder which sucks for us all. I toss and turn all night and have weird dreams. 
    Hope everyone has a Happy Valentine’s Day! It’s our 11 year dating anniversary so we are making a nice dinner at home. :) 
    TTC 4 years. 7 failed IUI's with either Clomid, Femara and/or Trigger Shots. Started IVF journey in February 2017. Polyps removed in May. 1st IVF Transfer September 26th. BFP. Expected due date 6/14/18. Baby boy born 5/25/18 at 6 lb 9 oz. My bundle of joy. 
  • **lurking** As for the baby shower thing, I'm actually tempted to just plan my own one. I find it kind of a huge ask of someone to host, pay, and plan a shower. And I think my SIL might bail on hosting since she is so tied up right now. :( I'm almost 29w so if I do plan one myself (which means getting a room at a restaurant since we don't have a home) I need to send invites out fast. I don't plan on calling it a shower, it will be a "celebration"! To heck with antiquated etiquette. Not everyone is lucky enough to have a family member or friend do this kind of thing.
    My TTC journey:
    Me and DH: 30-35
    Unexplained infertility
    TTC #1 since 2015
    11/2015 - BFP!     12/2015 - MC  :'(
    IVF #1 July 2017 freeze all (20 eggs, 15 mature, 10 fert, 6 blasts, 4 PGS normal)
    FET #1 TBD  Surprise BFP 9/2017 while waiting for FET... hoping for the best!

    Pregnancy Ticker


  • @helloworld9 I almost did the same thing... I think that sounds like a fun idea. I think planning your own is great. Even though my friend is hosting mine I plan on paying for it as I don’t want to burden people with that. 
    TTC 4 years. 7 failed IUI's with either Clomid, Femara and/or Trigger Shots. Started IVF journey in February 2017. Polyps removed in May. 1st IVF Transfer September 26th. BFP. Expected due date 6/14/18. Baby boy born 5/25/18 at 6 lb 9 oz. My bundle of joy. 
  • @holls214 happy 11yr :)  I'm sure the ur nervous about the cervix but as long as they're keep a watch hopefully all will be fine.  Look at it as more time to ease your mind and see the baby...thats what I tell myself with all these extra appt.  I swear the crazy dreams are just too much!!  I wake up to go pee and I"m like what the hell am I dreaming its so odd!!!  Have a great shower glad your mom is here for it!!

    @helloworld9 i'm sorry but r u kidding with your SIL, not to be a hater but come on...why offer.  Not that you need her I think your plan is spot on!!  Enjoy yourself!!

    @loverin I believe I have an idea from US but its still under wraps...OH doens't want to know....but I have my suspicions :)  I wish I could be the optimistic one, I think just having the rug pulled out from me the last time I'm just terrified at every turn.  Every time I got to the bathroom and wipe I pray theres no blood...sorry TMI thats just my reality.  Each day that passes I pray will get easier, I just keep dreaming about holding this baby and its being healthy and perfect!!

    @Irisheyes81 I was laughing reading your post remember how I was just a tummy sleeper and then 3 years ago I started telling myself that I need to start training my body to sleep on my back (didn't know the whole side thing) so I would be ready once I got pregnant.  Didn't think I'd need 3 years to get there ;)  I was so sick through the first trimester it was hard to find a good spot to sleep too...I'm on a cloud of pillows to help get through!  Wanna laugh about my echo, I asked my dr the results and she tells me they must've have not come in and the hospitals are sometimes delayed with them...but if there was an issue they would've called already  OK  Fast forward to me talking to reception telling them they may need to reach out to the hospital to get my results.  They look up my name to tell me the results are here and the dr signed them so she did see them.  OK great.  Glad she checked my file before seeing me.

    WHOEVER said my love handles are real OMG dying over here!  I was really hoping the baby would just pull mine forward but not so much :D

    AFM: Happy to report that baby is looking good and everything is on point weighing 1.5lb :)  I'm in the 50% so not too big or small, just on point.  Trust me I was thrilled to hear!  Since I've been having pains these last fews days and panicked I had her double checking my fluid and everything.  I'm just so freaked...I hate that.  I'm usually not that person, and I hate that my past has turned me into this person!  SO far the dr did assure me that everything I was explaining about my pains sounds exactly right on with regular ligaments stretching so I should try to relax.  I'm trying it just tough at times. 
    I was a lil disappointed that they dont do 3d US...only if something is wrong and they need to do one for the baby...really??/  Not what I wanted to hear.  Obviously I dont want anything to be wrong but I would like one.  I see so many people have them, didn't know it was this big thing!!
    Hope everyone enjoyed valentines day...or as my niece likes to call it, happy love day!!  G-d do I love that kid!!  


    History of TTC in spoiler box
    TTC since 2014
    Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30
    7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN 
    IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle :( RE thought I would get at least 10.
    IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN
    IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F,  3DT)-BFP  with TWINS // MC both at almost 10wks  :'( 
    IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP  (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal  :'( 
    IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!! :)
    IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!! :)
    IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!

  • Regarding the baby shower, a friend offered to do one for me on my first. I bought all the food, drinks, cake, etc. Basically anything that cost money. She already had a bunch of fold up tables and chairs so she just brought all of that, the games, and decorations she made (and i bought some stuff at dollar stores and crap). We both set up together at my house and she took over once the party started. I know it's not proper etiquette, but imo I couldn't of slept at night putting that cost on her shoulders. 

    If you want to have one and no one offers to host and pay, at least try and find someone to keep things moving and oversees things!
  • @helloworld9 you could always host something after baby is born, like a Sip n' See.  People can come see the baby & you can have drinks/apps.  I think we'll do that with my DH side bc his family is all I'm Savannah & I don't really think we'll get there before the baby is born.  Plus we don't know what we're having so it'll be fun to do something after he/she is here. I had friends offer but they don't live near me & they're not all in the same group, so my mom is hosting a brunch at a restaurant & they are taking on invites, dessert, decor, etc. 
  • Thanks everyone. I'm really miffed at my husband's sister for offering to throw a shower, and then being really wishy washy while I'm approaching 29w this weekend. Not to mention, I chipped in (a lot) for her bridal shower and bachelorette party, and then we also got her a generous wedding gift and she didn't give us a wedding gift at our wedding!! WTF!!!!! My husband knows I have a dislike for his sister (LOL! poor guy).

    I guess I could do a sip and see, but I'm a little hesitant to invite a bunch of people over while the baby is still so young and expose him to a bunch of potential germs? Is that crazy?

    @Hopeful_mom That's great news about your appointment!!
    My TTC journey:
    Me and DH: 30-35
    Unexplained infertility
    TTC #1 since 2015
    11/2015 - BFP!     12/2015 - MC  :'(
    IVF #1 July 2017 freeze all (20 eggs, 15 mature, 10 fert, 6 blasts, 4 PGS normal)
    FET #1 TBD  Surprise BFP 9/2017 while waiting for FET... hoping for the best!

    Pregnancy Ticker


  • @helloworld9 ugh I hear you on SIL's...my DH sister is so narcissistic.  She didn't acknowledge our announcement and wrote something then deleted it.  She hates for the spotlight to not be on her, god forbid.  
    I'd do a Sip n See around 3months, that's our plan for the one down south.  But you need to do what you're comfortable with!  I don't think I'll even invite my SIL or any of DH family to mine.  They can offer to host their own or just do the Sip n See.  
  • I’ll have to catch up with everyone tomorrow when I’m on the computer but just wanted to update on my echo...,,heart looked “beautiful” and little one was wiggling away! Still in the same position so no change on the amniotic band. Going to go to the pool this weekend to see if being in there helps get him/her to change positions at all. 

    DH also got me a pregnancy pillow for my bday so trying that out tonight!!
  • Quick update as it’s the middle of the night and a random sound woke me up... I had a good OB follow-up on Tuesday and she assured me it was okay that I had fallen asleep on my back, despite my anxieties about it LOL but that I should try to start sleeping on either side. The u-shaped pillow has definitely helped with that, thankfully! Now if only I could sleep well through the entire night!  

    And then on Thursday we had our anatomy scan!!!!! Baby was moving and turning and waving hands/arms and for the most part cooperating but they want me back in a month due to my advanced maternal age (why does that always make me feel so ancient?!) and because they didn’t get as great of shots for some measurements. Overall though, baby is doing well. <3 We found out the gender because my husband really wanted to know and felt it would help us prepare, while I really didn’t want to find out, but since it meant so much to him, I agreed. My stipulation of finding out is to not tell anyone, and to avoid the questions, we’re just saying that we’ll all find out the gender after I deliver. Everyone still tries to guess, especially my MiL, so we’ll have to be careful to not let it spill! Since DH attended the anatomy scan appointment, I gave him the option to opt out of attending the follow-up anatomy scan and he said he wanted to come. I was slightly surprised and definitely pleased, and I think this is his way of seeing how the pregnancy is real. 

    After all the IF stuff, this pregnancy truly feels real. I still have a lot of anxieties over it and DH and I say we’re always cautiously optimistic, but it’s such a beautiful thing to be pregnant. I hope you ladies are all doing well!
  • cseley321cseley321 member
    edited February 2018
    @helloworld9 you're not crazy at all. I don't care for sip and sees for that very reason. Also with my first I was so exhausted from having a newborn, sluggish from the c section, there's no way I would have wanted to entertain guests. Some people have an easier time, and kudos to them, but I was completely spent! 
  • Hey guys. Quick question. When did you guys start to feel the baby move? I am 16 weeks and haven’t felt anything that I know of. The books say around now but I wanted your feedback....


    • Me: 36 DH: 33
    • TTC since June 2016
    • Me: PCOS DH: Morphology 1%
    • 3 TI with Famera and trigger shots-BFN
    • 3 IUI's with Famera and trigger shots- BFN
    • IVF August 2017 25 eggs retrieved, 19 mature, 13 fertilized (ICSI), 5 frozen, 3 PGS normal 
    • FET November 2017 Transferred one 6 day blast (a little GIRL) BFP EDD 8/4/18

  • I don’t think I felt it/noticed it till closer to almost 18 weeks. 

    We had a gender reveal and its a GIRL!! I’m a little in shock. Everyone we know has boys so it’ll be an adventure! Telling my parents in person next weekend!
  • @mtpbadger awww very exciting!!! Congrats! Also how was the pregnancy pillow? Which one did you get? I love my u-shaped pillow! 

    @Irisheyes81 I’m 19w tomorrow and FTM, and I haven’t felt the baby move or kick, and the dr told me not to expect anything until 19w at the earliest. They say that second time moms can tell the difference between flutters and gas, and I’m thinking I had flutters Thursday night since it wasn’t gas. LOL I’ve heard many FTM say they didn’t feel anything until 20+w. 

    @helloworld9 @Aera11 This is the first I’ve heard of “sip and see”! What is it exactly? Usually my girlfriends will let us visit when they’re ready and we’ll bring food and hold the baby. During this flu season, people are very cautious (and rightly so) about visitors so I would then you just try to make sure the people who visit are people you trust and are healthy.

    @helloworld9 That really sucks about your SiL. :( Sorry that happened to you. 

    @cseley321 @loverin thanks for the baby shower advice!

    @Hopeful_mom glad your dr was reassuring about your current pains! It’s confusing sometimes what’s supposed to hurt and what’s not supposed to be painful. I don’t know when they decide to do 3D. Baby kept moving around for me so I don’t know if that was a factor. Maybe it’s based on the dr/office or insurance?

    @Aera11 your story about names is hilarious! It’s like when we first told family members that we wouldn’t share the gender and my great-aunt replied, but you’ll tell me, right? What part of “no one” did you not understand? LOL Now we just say we’re not finding out the gender at all and we’re definitely not sharing our name ideas. I can’t believe a friend’s ex would even follow up with you! 

    @coco305 I’m sorry that’s happening with you too, but at least the registry stuff is fun (when it’s not overwhelming!). :)

    Sorry if I missed any replies, but I’m going to post this reply before it gets accidentally deleted on me again. Ha! 

     




  • Happy Chinese New Year for those that celebrate!!!

    @Irisheyes81 I'm a FTM and the first kicks are so hard to tell.  16wks no way, not me.  Dr said I probably wouldn't feel anything till week 20.  I would say "I thought" I felt my first kick week 18/19... so don't stress! Also note wherever ur placenta is located could play a roll on when u feel it too! After week 20 I could start to feal it more.   Best feeling in the world, trust me
    when it starts really happening ull know.  I try and ask this sweet baby to kill and dip me all day :)

    @mtpbadger awwww congrats on ur princess! How was it revealed?  So happy for u!!

    @jr102217 great that u r sticking to ur guns and made ur hubby happy at the same time! U go girl!!!  I'm started to think of names for both sexes but won't be asking opinions either ;)
    History of TTC in spoiler box
    TTC since 2014
    Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30
    7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN 
    IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle :( RE thought I would get at least 10.
    IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN
    IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F,  3DT)-BFP  with TWINS // MC both at almost 10wks  :'( 
    IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP  (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal  :'( 
    IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!! :)
    IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!! :)
    IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!

  • @Irisheyes81 I'm a STM and with my first I started feeling tiny little bubbles around 17 weeks. His placenta was posterior. With this pregnancy I barely felt anything until around 19/20 weeks and now at 23 weeks I feel movement daily. This placenta is anterior. So placenta has a huge factor in it! Do you know where yours is positioned?
  • Happy Sunday everyone! DH did not have the flu and is all better, it was a sinus/ear infection. Poor guy. Thank you all for the well wishes. 
     @IrishEyes81 i felt flutters once in the 17th week, and nothing since. I'm 19+1 and I'm still waiting. Dr said probably nothing until 20 weeks. Def check for placenta position. My co-worker, who is a week ahead of me, said she felt bubbles. 
    @mtpbadger yay for a girl!! What a wonderful surprise. 
    @jr102217 I'm also AMA, I had anatomy scan #1 at 16 weeks and getting my 2nd one at 20weeks. Also there were things that they couldn't measure because it was too early. At least we get to see the baby again:) 

    I finally just admitted to myself that i don't like baby showers, and i avoid attending them at all
    costs (you guys can relate right? All the hurt that comes with seeing other women achieve this so effortlessly) so I don't think I'm going to have one. I may consider doing a type of couple's party with our friends, something fancy casual like a champagne BBQ. A last hurrah to having minimal responsibility. 
    As for Sip & See's I used to see the pros to them, but now that I'm pregnant, I don't think I want that many people around the baby all at once. Plus, I'm Hispanic and people love to crowd and overstay their welcomes, plus have zero regard for a baby's wellness. I'm so paranoid,  I'd probably have a nurse at the door administering flu and TDAP shots to all the visitors. 
    So I'm 19 weeks, almost half way through, with a baby the size of a large mango and it hit me: I'm gonna have to push this baby out & I freaked out!! I feel guilty for sounding so ungrateful, but child birth has always scared me, and it's becoming real.

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