Unpopular Opinion (UO) Thursday 2/15

princesslockness · February 2018

100% agree with @Firemanswife11. I will let anyone who knows about safe handling and storing to come check out our set up. I will submit to re-applying for our guns if new guidelines are put in place. My argument is that, not everyone will, and there is no way of knowing who all of those people are to make the be re-evaluated.

Anything that comes out of new gun laws will be difficult to implement without a door-to-door search.

mrsbubbles-2 · February 2018

@princesslockness - that's so true.

legallykate · February 2018

princesslockness said:

100% agree with @Firemanswife11. I will let anyone who knows about safe handling and storing to come check out our set up. I will submit to re-applying for our guns if new guidelines are put in place. My argument is that, not everyone will, and there is no way of knowing who all of those people are to make the be re-evaluated.

Anything that comes out of new gun laws will be difficult to implement without a door-to-door search.

While I agree with this, I very much disagree with the mentality that if we can't prevent 100% of gun incidents then we shouldn't bother preventing any at all. I say if we can implement new policies/regulations that will prevent even one incident, it's worth it to do so.

hfooter · February 2018

lalala2004 said:

coffeecocktailsandcake said:

WTH! Does that girl have twins or is she two weeks past due???? Maybe her arm is making her bump look much bigger than it is....lol. Well, I will definitely not be showing up like that to a sprinkle, lol

I think we can agree we would never comment on one another’s bumps like this, right? Just because it’s a random Internet pictures doesn’t make commenting on her body OK. Sure, comment on the weird flower belt. It’s fugly, that’s why the picture was posted.

Thank you @lalala2004 that comment about twins pissed me off. With my first I was asked this 5 times by strangers and by the 4th and 5th time I yelled at the women telling them you never ever ask a women if she is having twins. So rude and disrespectful. The fact that we even comment on “how big” women are getting grossed me out.

I’m for more gun control. I cannot believe this is something that is even a UO but I shouldn’t be surprised considering who was elected into office.

if it were easy to move to another country and start over DH and I would be out of here. I’m tired of this bullshit. American is not great and it’s continuing to get worse. And yes mental health plays into it but what’s going on? Oh right universal healthcare is blasphemy. So what do we get? Shitty health care at astronomical prices. We pay $1100 a month for shitty health care and it pisses me off each month.

I dont care if people have second showers. Whatever. It’s weird we get so wrapped up in what other women choose to celebrate in regards to their babies. Like why? What’s the point in side eyeing someone for celebrating a new life coming soon? Doesn’t make sense.

princesslockness · February 2018

@legallykate When did I say don't make the laws? I was just explaining why it won't be 100% , as people (at least around my area) think it will be. I will not willing submit to mandated door-to-door. I will voluntarily have someone with the proper knowledge and position come to check, but if it was ever mandated I will stand my ground. You (general you) have not right or reason to require a home inspection from everyone.

F47 · February 2018

princesslockness said:

@legallykate When did I say don't make the laws? I was just explaining why it won't be 100% , as people (at least around my area) think it will be. I will not willing submit to mandated door-to-door. I will voluntarily have someone with the proper knowledge and position come to check, but if it was ever mandated I will stand my ground. You (general you) have not right or reason to require a home inspection from everyone.

But, to be fair, @legallykate didn’t say she recommends door-to-door searches, so that’s kind of a moot point. I think what she’s saying is that there’s no reason to not bother with regulations just because they won’t be followed 100%. People don’t always follow speed limits, either, but they’re in place for a reason and serve a purpose.

lalala2004 · February 2018

Firemanswife11 said:

msmonalisavito said:

I do have to ask, because I don’t know, if there is any protocol in place to ensure that those who have purchased guns legally are, in fact, responsible gun owners?

Anyone who obtains a gun legally can say they are responsible but is there any follow-up on that? Are their rules and regulations of where guns must be stored in the home? Or are we taking someone’s word that they are responsible?

@msmonalisavito not really, no. I mean, I can legally buy a gun, load it, leave the safety off, take it home and set it on the counter for anyone to grab. I'm not going to DO that, but who is stopping me?

I'll go out on a limb here and say that most people with children (specifically) are probably as safe as they can be with guns in the home, and I'd personally be willing to let whomever come on in and check out our situation to prove we're "responsible" gun owners. I was raised around guns and use them now. I practice to keep myself comfortable and familiar and when my gun is out of the safe, I have it holstered, on my person, with the safety on, unless I am actively practicing.

All of those things (and much more) are about being a responsible gun owner. Simply having a safe with guns in it doesn't mean you're responsible. I think a lot of people think they're responsible but there's no checking on anyone or anything like that.

FWIW, I am very much of the opinion that it's time to change the ease of access to guns, fix our horrible mental health access, and get guns out of the hands of people who have no business having them. Our children are so much more important than needing a pile of guns at home.

Not totally sure where I went with all of this. I'm angry. I'm sad. I think as a gun owner/carrier I can still think it's time for the government to help us out here. Sitting on our hands and quoting the 2nd Amendment isn't helping anyone.

Most people isn’t enough when there were 141 children who died due to this last year alone. https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.usatoday.com/amp/95209084

Firemanswife11 · February 2018

@lalala2004 I don't disagree with you in the slightest. That number should be 0.

vinerie · February 2018

alinafed said:

Just gonna throw it out there: in Canada we have bullying and 1/5 people have mental health issues just like in the USA. However we have had seven school shootings in our history going back to the 70s, and only two in the 2000s, some of which were at colleges and not high schools.
By all means better support the mentally ill and reduce bullying, but I don't think mental health and bullying are the reason you guys have school shootings with the frequency that you do.

Correct. Here is a graph that is quite illuminating on the topic. Access to guns is STRONGLY correlated with mass shootings. I support evidence-based solutions and the evidence is crystal f***ing clear. I cried on my drive home hearing about this. I simply do not understand this country's allegiance to guns.

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/24/3xwj69ji9ct3.png

princesslockness · February 2018

@vinerie No other country has had the political upheaval of the US in the last 10 years either. Some deep seated beliefs, faiths, or ideals have been challenged, set aside, or completely trampled.

alinafed · February 2018

princesslockness said:

@vinerie No other country has had the political upheaval of the US in the last 10 years either. Some deep seated beliefs, faiths, or ideals have been challenged, set aside, or completely trampled.

You know in 2016 alone Brazil and South Korea impeached their presidents, there was a failed coup in Turkey, and Britain voted to leave the EU and totally change its political system right? Ever heard of the Arab spring and then the rise of ISIL? Followed Russian and Eurasian politics in the last 20 years? To think the USA is the country with the MOST political upheaval in the last ten years (I'm not even talking about countries experiencing civil wars or, you know, Syria or anything) is mind-blowing to me.

lakesideknitter · February 2018

@princesslockness No other country? Including the ones in the middle of civil wars?

I haven't been able to add much today, but I've been following as much as possible. I am all for improving mental health conditions/access, but I'm fucking disgusted with the Republican politicians using that as an excuse to not talk about gun control and then DOING NOTHING TO IMPROVE MENTAL HEALTH. Let's see some real changes in both aspects.

Edit: TB ate half my post

juliebird6 · February 2018

princesslockness said:

@vinerie No other country has had the political upheaval of the US in the last 10 years either. Some deep seated beliefs, faiths, or ideals have been challenged, set aside, or completely trampled.

I'm not sure what type of upheaval you are specifically referring to, but I don't agree with the notion that other countries aren't currently in the midst of their own crises. I would argue that there are several other counties experiencing similar political upheaval - England, Spain, Venezuela, the Philippines, I could go on and on. And while some are also dealing with violence issues, those have overwhelmingly been labeled as terrorist and not domestic terrorism like mass shootings in the US.

alinafed · February 2018

There have been 2 new countries created in the last ten years, and other regions trying to secede - if that's not upheaval I don't know what is.

If you believe there are political reasons that people are killing others that happen to only apply to the US that is one thing, but to make a sweeping claim that applies to almost 200 countries....

princesslockness · February 2018

Excuse me, I must live under a rock. None of that news has made it into my local papers, news broadcasts, or any discussions I have overheard or participated in.

legallykate · February 2018

I'm failing to grasp the link between school shootings and political upheaval. From everything I've read, these teens aren't killing either teens (or younger kids in some cases) due to any political leanings/ideologies/etc, they are troubled young adults who have access (whether legally or otherwise) to weapons that allow them to carry out mass murder in a matter of minutes.

lalala2004 · February 2018

princesslockness said:

Excuse me, I must live under a rock. None of that news has made it into my local papers, news broadcasts, or any discussions I have overheard or participated in.

Is this sarcasm? You haven’t heard of the Syrian refugee crisis or ISIS?

princesslockness · February 2018

lalala2004 said:

princesslockness said:

Excuse me, I must live under a rock. None of that news has made it into my local papers, news broadcasts, or any discussions I have overheard or participated in.

Is this sarcasm? You haven’t heard of the Syrian refugee crisis or ISIS?

Its not sarcasm. I had not heard of any of that until I saw the responses. I'm leaving this thread for a bit to catch up on things that don't make it to the news where I live.

lalala2004 · February 2018

princesslockness said:

lalala2004 said:

princesslockness said:

Excuse me, I must live under a rock. None of that news has made it into my local papers, news broadcasts, or any discussions I have overheard or participated in.

Is this sarcasm? You haven’t heard of the Syrian refugee crisis or ISIS?

Its not sarcasm. I had not heard of any of that until I saw the responses. I'm leaving this thread for a bit to catch up on things that don't make it to the news where I live.

Yeah, I strongly recommend expanding your sources of news. It’s one thing to not be informed, but you can’t claim the US is the only country experiencing political upheaval when you simply don’t know anything about any other country.

satin_doll · February 2018

@hezzer78 Ughhh, I love backyard parties so much that it hurts. The music, food, and sun gives me so much life! I hope my baby shower looks something like one.

I am new to the bump as this is going to be my first child but I imagined that I would learn from and relate to a large group of different types of women for as long as possible. I get that some women want to make deeper connections with consistent users but I also understand that I some women only engage when they are engaged. Anywho, I just think it may be too early for the private groups. I just want to learn as much as possible, right now.

derbysquirrel · February 2018

I'm a FTM, and I've never been to a baby shower. Actually, I did once when I was 12. I tagged along with my mom. I didn't know until joining this group that baby showers were only for first babies. I assumed that they were to celebrate any new baby. Are gifts really required? I know it's customary, but if I were to have a shower I'd rather have people show up and have a good time without bringing a gift than to stay home. Making gifts mandatory really does make it sound like a gift grab rather than a celebration of new life. If I have a shower it will mostly be an excuse to have a get together with my friends and have a good time.

princesslockness · February 2018

I have now done a quick Sparknotes catch up with printed articles for my weekend reading. I apologize for my grossly ignorant and blanket statement. I was operating under the impression that my local channels' news program and news papers were covering the major world events. I do not have anything other than local news readily available, and will be finding a source with a more global outlook.

In response to Legally Kate, I was trying to point out that with all of the major changes that have happened in the US's politics has caused major upheaval in areas of the US. I personally have heard parents *preaching* to their children about how 'the world is ending and we are all going to die due to ______________' Then asking about how the kids plan to change it. One response has been to draw attention to their beliefs nationally.

mrsbubbles-2 · February 2018

@derbysquirrel I think the reasoning behind it is that the purpose of a shower is to shower the new Mom / bride to be with gifts. That’s why they call it a sprinkle for a 2nd baby, it’s typically smaller than a shower.

You can totally do a get together with no gift expectation, but if you call it a shower people usually come with gifts.

pghctwife · February 2018

derbysquirrel said:

I'm a FTM, and I've never been to a baby shower. Actually, I did once when I was 12. I tagged along with my mom. I didn't know until joining this group that baby showers were only for first babies. I assumed that they were to celebrate any new baby. Are gifts really required? I know it's customary, but if I were to have a shower I'd rather have people show up and have a good time without bringing a gift than to stay home. Making gifts mandatory really does make it sound like a gift grab rather than a celebration of new life. If I have a shower it will mostly be an excuse to have a get together with my friends and have a good time.

Usually yes, gifts are kinda required. The idea is to shower the mother with the stuff she needs to help the family. And to celebrate!

I thunk that you can totally do a sprinkle and word it carefully as ‘celebrating mom and baby’ but I think ppl will bring gifts unless it’s made very clear.

I think a sprinkle to pamper mom and maybe some diapers or something is a nice idea for s+tm but a fullshower... yeah it seems gift grabby (with a few exceptions)

derbysquirrel · February 2018

@pghctwife
I mean, I'll totally take the gifts! I love presents, but that's not a requirement to come to my party. I'd rather see my friends and have them celebrate with me than to have them stay home because of a stupid gift. I'm not selfless enough to say "no gifts" though

lalala2004 · February 2018

@princesslockness do you have a local source for NPR? They tend to do really well covering local and global news. And since they are generally public radio stations they aren’t as influenced by advertisers.

jsnakehole · February 2018

That girl I've mentioned who is having her second tax-payer funded baby this year posted that the real cause of school shootings is the "pussyfication" of America. Her comments hurt my brain so much I can't even think of a way to tell her how dumb she is.

mrsbubbles-2 · February 2018

@jsnakehole I had that same word used in my feed today. I’m over here like

msmonalisavito · February 2018

Showers are to shower the mother-to-be with gifts so it’s expected and known to be a gift giving event.

I think if you want to have a get together with friends, family, and food, just have one and leave the title “shower/sprinkle” out of it. If someone wants to give you a gift, they don’t need an event to do so.

ecwk · February 2018

princesslockness said:

Excuse me, I must live under a rock. None of that news has made it into my local papers, news broadcasts, or any discussions I have overheard or participated in.

Where do you live again? I’m not being facetious here, I really cannot believe that you haven’t heard of any of this. I’m not the most au fait with current events and politics by any standard but I really thought that issues like the Syrian refugee crisis and Brexit, for example, are inescapable and permeate all levels of the media. Our local news here in Boston covers these things, but maybe that’s not the case everywhere?

@derbysquirrel if you feel at all uncomfortable with this idea of receiving gifts or having a party that implies people must bring them, you could consider a “sip and see” after the baby is born. People can come hang out, meet baby, and have a good time. Some people love it, it sounds like my idea of hell tbh, but it’s something you could consider!

elsieisamoocow · February 2018

@jsnakehole @mrsbubbles-2 I had my own SIL post something that said the same thing today. After she hijacked my post on fb yesterday demanding we protect our kids now, while saying that gun control won't work. At least I learned that she did not in fact vote for our president, which I had previously suspected. But I'm gonna have to unfollow her if she posts anything like that again.

princesslockness · February 2018

@lalala2004 I do, I just can’t have radio playing in my classroom. So I get 5 minutes snippets every morning and evening.

@ecwk southern Idaho. Fairly small town, with like 2 gas stations and 5 four way stops.

lalala2004 · February 2018

I don’t really debate gun control much any more. I’ll debate specific issues like people who think teachers should carry guns (yeah, no thanks). Because this is something that people who have strong feelings about won’t change their views. Not at this point. The 2nd amendment being what it is, only small changes are possible, and whenever small changes are made, gun sales go up, increasing gun accidents. I do support more gun control, I do support more mental healthcare, training, etc. There are a LOT of factors in these attacks. I just think that it’s gone on so long and so many guns are out there, it’s just never going to be fully resolved. I wish that weren’t true, I know that’s cynical, and I hope I’m wrong, but I don’t feel like debating it will change much. People talk about other countries, but most countries aren’t as large and none have the amount of guns we already do, and I don’t know of any that have a constitutional amendment protecting them. I’ll do what I can with my vote, joining advocate groups, raising my children, and teaching my students, but arguing with people who think nothing should be changed is a waste of my energy. And y’all know I love a debate

This is just too emotional for me to really get into it.

F47 · February 2018

@princesslockness I just want to commend you for your research and subsequent apology for your statement about political upheaval. That takes a humble person and I respect it.

princesslockness · February 2018

@F47 thank you. I am very strong willed, and can definitely be an ass about things. I’m working on it.

alinafed · February 2018

princesslockness said:

@F47 thank you. I am very strong willed, and can definitely be an ass about things. I’m working on it.

Wow, I totally commend you on your answer - that is hella impressive that you are so open-minded to learn new things. There are at least 40 armed conflicts and 5 genocides currently going on in the world - I am so glad you are interesting in broadening your perspective!

7425cait · February 2018

Been MIA. Just catching up.
100% there should be stricter gun control. There is no reason that anyone should own anything more than a hand gun for protection and a 2 shot hunting rifle. It's should take a longer time to be approved with serious background and mental health checks. Hell, to become a substitute teacher I need to have a background check. In order to work at a local restaurant as a server, I need to take a quiz that assessed my honesty. And if I hear "thoughts and prayers" one more time, I'm gonna scream.

As for a private FB group, I am not interested in participating in one. Also, the private bump group I'm in didn't even really get started until we we're almost at our due dates, if not after we delivered. Why the rush to separate? Because of a couple pop ins that provide me entertainment? Unless we start sharing identifiable or incredibly personal information about ourselves, I don't think a private group is necessary.

kburg15 · February 2018

Whew just got caught up. I will add 2 things:

Beyond “mental health” I really think that one thing that doesn’t come up often enough in these debates is toxic masculinity and societal expectations/norms placed on boys and men. As an honest question, have there been any mass shootings committed by women? I haven’t done enough research to know, but I think and our patriarchal society is an even bigger issue than the blanket term of “mental health.” Probably a UO.

Also I won’t be having a second shower, unless it’s specified no gifts and we just have a few of our couples friends over for food and hanging out though. We do that frequently enough and I love it, so any excuse to get together works for me! When I was pregnant the first time I wish I would’ve stood my ground and had the type of shower I wanted (couples, no games, no big 30 mins of gift opening where everyone watched as I sweated profusely, etc). My friend is having an open house style bridal shower for all family/friends and I love that type of idea.

lakesideknitter · February 2018

@kburg15 @lalala2004 posted a really great article above (I think it was in this thread) about that very topic.

ecwk · February 2018

lakesideknitter said:

@kburg15 @lalala2004 posted a really great article above (I think it was in this thread) about that very topic.

Link:https://byrslf.co/thoughts-on-the-vegas-shooting-14af397cee2c

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