@May14th2011 Oh! I think I did see this condition on a show in the UK called 'Embarrassing Bodies' where people encounter the show's doctors to deal with things that are controversial or, well, embarrassing. It definitely did look very painful. I would certainly understand correcting for something like that, especially if it runs in families!
I'm sure a lot of this does come down to personal experiences, too. So far all I have to go by is that H is circumcised as is my dad, but my brother is not. He's now 21 and has never had a problem. H is convinced that it needn't be done, so it's more of a "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" kind of stance, lol.
My confession is that I probably get an unhealthy amount of joy reading the hot mess threads that pop up on the bump. There is a great one over on high risk pregnancies right now with one of those "all the tests and blood tests are negative but I know I'm pregnant" deals. I'm trying to restrain myself from commenting so I don't end up in bump jail.
Me: 28 Husband: 31 TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016 Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
@NamelessAria Oh man, I just tried to hop over there for the juicy details but OP's post was some serious TL;DR. I ended up just reading the response to get an idea.
@May14th2011@silvergreen the term is phimosis. It can be very painful, especially during an erection. I'm not sure how common it is to need a circ later in life, but its very painful
AFM- I don't want to open gifts one at a time at a future shower. It takes forever, and if most people buy off your registry, everyone knows what you're getting. So everyone has to sit and watch you open gifts forever. I dislike everyone staring at me and I'm sure most everyone is bored. But I guess I'll be sucking it up and doing it. Haha
@bearmoons Yes, it does look terribly painful! The show even showed the procedure and *TMI warning* a lot of smegma had been trapped under there because it was that tight. It was probably one of the most shocking things I wasn't prepared to see, lol. I just did a quick search (thank you for sharing the name of the condition) and Mayo Clinic lists it as rare (less than 200,000 cases a year), so that's certainly reassuring!
@silvergreen I did a rotation with an awful pediatrician that thought EVERY uncircumcised boy had phimosis. He was obsessed. He would scold the parents and just yank back the foreskin. Ugh. But boys started getting erections around 2/3, and if they actually do have phimosis, poor kiddos! Makes me glad I don't have a penis!
@bearmoons my cousin is a nurse in pediatrics and just had a 5 yr old boy come in with an injury that required circumcision. She said it was awful all around, poor kid.
@bearmoons Ugh, that's bad. I definitely would circumcise my son if it were medically necessary. But I wonder how he imagines the rest of the uncircumcised population (that's two-thirds of the male human race) survive, lol. It's a shame doctors feel they can behave in that judgmental manner, whatever their stance. They really shouldn't voice their opinion unless solicited by the patient/patient's guardian.
We’re having a boy and I’d prefer to circumcise, I plan to let DH make the decision so i know we’ll probably skip. DH is not circumcised he’s the only guy I’ve ever been with that’s not. sexually/personally I don’t like it. DH once (about 5 years ago) got an infection because of it and I had to get checked, I didn’t have it, but it bothered me that he had something that could effect me. It makes for extra work during sex as well. The random sex anywhere anytime is more of an issue for uncircumcised men (but they still want to do it). So for my own selfish reasons I’m pro circumcising.
@ffw0617 I would ask, but I don't want to pry or get too TMI about it, lol. Totally okay if it's a sexual preference of yours. I kind of hesitate on the whole infections argument because I assume any risk is akin to yeast infections in women - after all, we do have more skin/folds.
I did do a quick Google search since your post interested me and came across this article by Psychology Today, which seems to debunk the myth that infections are common in uncircumcised males: More Circumcision Myths You May Believe: Hygiene and STDs I was also pretty shocked to see phimosis shouldn't be diagnosed in young infants since the foreskin is naturally fused to the head of the penis and doesn't retract until at least the age of 3 and up until puberty. Maybe you should let that pediatrician know @bearmoons!
On the whole circumcision topic: My husband and I were very back and forth. We were leaning toward having our son circumcised. Mostly our reasoning was my husband and his brother were never circumcised and while my husband never had strong feelings one way or another on the issue his brother was exttemely resentful of having grown up "different." I told my husband I would go with whatever he wanted to do because I feel he is slightly more qualified to make decisions like that as I know nothing about having a penis. Our son ended up being born with a twisted raphe. We were told if we wanted to curcumsice we would need to wait till our son was at least 6 months old because he'd need to go under general anesthesia while the fix the twisted raphe and then circumcise afterward. Apparently the twisted raphe is a purely cosmetic issue if you aren't having the child circumcised. We didn't feel right about having such an involved procedure done for something that is probably more cosmetic than anything so we ended up not having our son circumcised.
I have no judgement at all for anyone's decision on circumcision. I think everyone just does what they feel is best.
Me: 28 Husband: 31 TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016 Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
@NamelessAria Thanks for sharing! I really enjoy hearing from other people about their experiences and reasons why they did or didn't. We're team green so we don't even know if we have to encounter this decision, but we do want to be prepared. I agree with you that it's definitely a personal decision.
For me, I did ask around since it wasn't something common where I grew up - I've read that the US is the only country in the world to practice routine circumcision for non-religious reasons. Most of my searches on the topic seem to boil down to religious, cultural or cosmetic reasons more than anything else. There seems a lot of excitement around health issues, but most of them are fairly rare, and from what I understand hygiene is no more challenging than it is for girls. To get further "real life" perspective I read a lot of comments on circumcision articles; some men are grateful they were circumcised, but I found more of the comments leaned towards disappointment that their parents made the choice to circumcise them (they don't usually disclose full reasons why). I've read that the foreskin is similar to the female clitoris in that it is rich in nerve-endings in addition to adding friction, so perhaps it's mostly for sexual reasons? Personally, there's just so many things at play that H and I came to the conclusion that we feel too conflicted about making that kind of decision for another human being even though he himself is circumcised. I guess we've ultimately decided (barring any medical issues) that we don't see any harm in letting our baby make the decision for himself one day.
I posted a video in the Pregnancy and Parenting thread which played a very large part in the decision we made not to circumcise DS. I was set to let DH decide, but he said he would honor my decision. I attended a baby fair at a local hospital, and passed a booth manned by members of Saving Our Sons and Intact Kentucky. After reading some leaflets they provided, I realized that I was about to make a decision that would impact the rest of my son's life, and that I almost did it without the least bit of research. The majority of my research led me to believe that it was medically unnecessary and largely cosmetic. I also am a firm believer in teaching my kids consent and it seemed to me that it would be hypocritical for me to teach my son that his body belongs to him, except when it comes to his genitals. I got a lot of grief from my extended family, but MIL said she regrets deciding to and wished that she had been better informed, that back then it was just assumed that the procedure would be done. Ultimately, what anyone chooses to do in this arena is none of my business. We did what we thought was best for our family. The reasons we chose not to are ours, and I would not impose my thinking on anyone else. You do you. These are just my two cents.
@kfren Wow, I just finished it and it pretty much confirmed most of what I've thought/read and then some. I was thinking it might be biased in some way, but his research and arguments really back up every opinion he had. I actually wanted to cry through some parts of it that were too difficult to watch.
TMI (real life sex anecdotes) @silvergreen I’d liken it to my first and only UTI i told my mom I had a UTI (I was 17) and she said “you can’t hold it in after sex, you have to pee.” And the dr said “well if you’re wiping front to back, the likely cause is waiting too long to clean after sex” and sure enough earlier that week I was sneaking around with my bf at the time and avoiding the bathroom bc I didn’t want to make it obvious we’d just had sex on the drive over. Similarly with uncircumcised men they cannot go long without properly cleaning after sex, it’s much more likely to lead to infection. And let’s just say that means no rainforest in Puerto Rico sex (lol). It wouldn’t be a big deal if you’re with a guy who didn’t think about sex on a hike in the rainforest, unfortunately that’s not my husband. And you have to say “no, there’s no where for you to wash up” and it kills the mood lol.
@silvergreen. Here’s just a few examples (please note I’m not trying to convince anyone to circumcise their child, as mentioned above my son will most likely not be circumcised- just sharing some of my personal experiences with a uncircumcised husband. And I never had these issues or worries with other circumcised men. So my it’s just my personal preference. I clearly still married my husband, it’s not a deal breaker, just differences).
“There are a couple of medical conditions specific to foreskin owners. Infections are somewhat common, and can often be confused with sexually transmitted infections (STIs). Posthitis is an infection that creates redness, swelling, and discharge. Balanoposthitis is accompanied by inflammation and irritation. Both have the tendency to recur, and can lead to serious complications.”
We decided not to circumcise LO. As an American, most of my sexual partners were circumcised, and seeing
uncircumcised penises was kind of weird at first. However, after
thinking more about it, that is purely cultural/cosmetic, and my opinion
on the whole thing has since changed quite a lot. My partner isn't circumcised, and it also is not common to circumcise where we live, so I don't think my son will grow up feeling different because of it. I also think circumcision for cosmetic reasons is...well...unnecessary, and making a pretty big decision on behalf of your baby that he might not approve of later in life, like @silvergreen says. I've read some articles by men who are afraid their circumcisions removed some of the feeling in their penises, which is sad.
The chances of needing circumcision for medical reasons are slim to none, but if LO does need one later in life - we'll deal with that if and when we need to. Or he can decide for himself. Circumcised men do need to be a little more conscious about their hygiene, but retracting the foreskin for some extra rinsing in the shower really isn't a big deal. (Though indeed, you can seriously hurt them by trying to retract the foreskin for cleaning as babies/toddlers!)
@=caenis= Regarding losing sensation in their penis: this appears to be true. The Georgetown professor in the video that @kfren posted on the Parenting Resources thread explains that the 15-20 square inches of tissue removed during circumcision contains 15,000-20,000 nerve endings - pretty significant. He uses the diagram below to show the sensitivity of an uncircumcised vs circumcised penis, with the red and purple locations having the highest sensitivity:
ETA: I'm assuming the 15-20 square inches he is referring to is the size of the foreskin as a fully mature adult male.
Re: FFFC 1/12
I'm sure a lot of this does come down to personal experiences, too. So far all I have to go by is that H is circumcised as is my dad, but my brother is not. He's now 21 and has never had a problem. H is convinced that it needn't be done, so it's more of a "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" kind of stance, lol.
TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016
Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss
Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
Baby #2 due June 12, 2018
@ramblebee Lol at pack a lunch. That’s no joke!
AFM- I don't want to open gifts one at a time at a future shower. It takes forever, and if most people buy off your registry, everyone knows what you're getting. So everyone has to sit and watch you open gifts forever. I dislike everyone staring at me and I'm sure most everyone is bored. But I guess I'll be sucking it up and doing it. Haha
TTC: 08/2017 EDD: 6/11/2018 FTM
I did do a quick Google search since your post interested me and came across this article by Psychology Today, which seems to debunk the myth that infections are common in uncircumcised males: More Circumcision Myths You May Believe: Hygiene and STDs I was also pretty shocked to see phimosis shouldn't be diagnosed in young infants since the foreskin is naturally fused to the head of the penis and doesn't retract until at least the age of 3 and up until puberty. Maybe you should let that pediatrician know @bearmoons!
My husband and I were very back and forth. We were leaning toward having our son circumcised. Mostly our reasoning was my husband and his brother were never circumcised and while my husband never had strong feelings one way or another on the issue his brother was exttemely resentful of having grown up "different." I told my husband I would go with whatever he wanted to do because I feel he is slightly more qualified to make decisions like that as I know nothing about having a penis. Our son ended up being born with a twisted raphe. We were told if we wanted to curcumsice we would need to wait till our son was at least 6 months old because he'd need to go under general anesthesia while the fix the twisted raphe and then circumcise afterward. Apparently the twisted raphe is a purely cosmetic issue if you aren't having the child circumcised. We didn't feel right about having such an involved procedure done for something that is probably more cosmetic than anything so we ended up not having our son circumcised.
I have no judgement at all for anyone's decision on circumcision. I think everyone just does what they feel is best.
TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016
Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss
Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
Baby #2 due June 12, 2018
For me, I did ask around since it wasn't something common where I grew up - I've read that the US is the only country in the world to practice routine circumcision for non-religious reasons. Most of my searches on the topic seem to boil down to religious, cultural or cosmetic reasons more than anything else. There seems a lot of excitement around health issues, but most of them are fairly rare, and from what I understand hygiene is no more challenging than it is for girls. To get further "real life" perspective I read a lot of comments on circumcision articles; some men are grateful they were circumcised, but I found more of the comments leaned towards disappointment that their parents made the choice to circumcise them (they don't usually disclose full reasons why). I've read that the foreskin is similar to the female clitoris in that it is rich in nerve-endings in addition to adding friction, so perhaps it's mostly for sexual reasons? Personally, there's just so many things at play that H and I came to the conclusion that we feel too conflicted about making that kind of decision for another human being even though he himself is circumcised. I guess we've ultimately decided (barring any medical issues) that we don't see any harm in letting our baby make the decision for himself one day.
The majority of my research led me to believe that it was medically unnecessary and largely cosmetic. I also am a firm believer in teaching my kids consent and it seemed to me that it would be hypocritical for me to teach my son that his body belongs to him, except when it comes to his genitals.
I got a lot of grief from my extended family, but MIL said she regrets deciding to and wished that she had been better informed, that back then it was just assumed that the procedure would be done.
Ultimately, what anyone chooses to do in this arena is none of my business. We did what we thought was best for our family. The reasons we chose not to are ours, and I would not impose my thinking on anyone else. You do you. These are just my two cents.
@silvergreen I’d liken it to my first and only UTI i told my mom I had a UTI (I was 17) and she said “you can’t hold it in after sex, you have to pee.” And the dr said “well if you’re wiping front to back, the likely cause is waiting too long to clean after sex” and sure enough earlier that week I was sneaking around with my bf at the time and avoiding the bathroom bc I didn’t want to make it obvious we’d just had sex on the drive over. Similarly with uncircumcised men they cannot go long without properly cleaning after sex, it’s much more likely to lead to infection. And let’s just say that means no rainforest in Puerto Rico sex (lol). It wouldn’t be a big deal if you’re with a guy who didn’t think about sex on a hike in the rainforest, unfortunately that’s not my husband. And you have to say “no, there’s no where for you to wash up” and it kills the mood lol.
TTC: 08/2017 EDD: 6/11/2018 FTM
“There are a couple of medical conditions specific to foreskin owners. Infections are somewhat common, and can often be confused with sexually transmitted infections (STIs). Posthitis is an infection that creates redness, swelling, and discharge. Balanoposthitis is accompanied by inflammation and irritation. Both have the tendency to recur, and can lead to serious complications.”
TTC: 08/2017 EDD: 6/11/2018 FTM
The chances of needing circumcision for medical reasons are slim to none, but if LO does need one later in life - we'll deal with that if and when we need to. Or he can decide for himself. Circumcised men do need to be a little more conscious about their hygiene, but retracting the foreskin for some extra rinsing in the shower really isn't a big deal. (Though indeed, you can seriously hurt them by trying to retract the foreskin for cleaning as babies/toddlers!)
My 2 cents.
ETA: I'm assuming the 15-20 square inches he is referring to is the size of the foreskin as a fully mature adult male.