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July 2018 Moms
stillcozy
member
Unpopular Opinion 1/4/17
stillcozy
member
Please share! I'll only judge a little
April Siggy Challenge Social Distancing
Re: Unpopular Opinion 1/4/17
My UO- kids are washable, the world will not end if they touch a germy surface or if *gasp* some clueless stranger touches them. It's ok to go out with your newborn, you don't even need the little yellow caution sign on their car seat warning people not to touch your baby, it will be ok.
@ashbub714 I actually like the fish filet too. Won't eat it all the time (I prefer a Big Mac, extra sauce). However, the fish filet sounds good every once in a while. Now I want McDonald fries...
@runsomewhere there's definitely precautions to take sometimes, but you're right! I hate seeing kids who can't play outside because their parents think they'll get too dirty. UGH. I regularly babysit a little girl, she's now two. We would take her outside.. can't remember how early, but after a year old.. she was scared of the grass, she didn't know what it was and when she fell she would cry for us to pick her up because she didn't want her hands to get dirty. Her mom is a HUGE clean freak. HUGE.
@amylu914 DH and I were out on a patio at a restaurant with DD the Tuesday after she was born (Friday night) because it was taco Tuesday and it felt right. We also went to an Oktoberfest festival when she was like 2 weeks old. Of course I was careful when she was so young and washed hands when touching her and other common sense things but it really is fine! I feel that women are bombarded with so much fear mongering and dated info that it causes FTMs a lot of unnecessary anxiety and causes them to be isolated at home which can lead to PPD.
ETA: interesting to read all the taking out the newborn stuff. As a ftm, I don’t know what’s what yet....
On the the topic of taking out newborns i didn’t do it much for the first month because i was recovering from a c section. Other than that i was mostly just careful with overly dirty people touching or kissing him. We still took him out (had to for jaundice). He still gets sick a lot especially when teething. He’s already gone through some contagious things but we survived. He’s at least vaccinated.
edited because i clicked post too soon
Also, damn you YouTube for not having this clip online, so I can link the hilarity!
Kind of goes hand in hand with allergies and early exposure like @christycalifornia said about animals.
Also I'm with you guys on getting out and about. I took DS to the pumpkin patch about 5 days after he was born. We were in the hospital for most of them, so we just needed fresh air, ya know? @zombiehoohaa That us totally my husband's and my thinking with our son, lol. I never did pacifier wipes, just a little brush off on the shirt. Kids with colds around constantly. He sticks something in his mouth, DH and I just look at eachother and shrug saying "immune system." It just comes down to common sense, at least with a healthy child, and anything beyond that is overkill for me, personally. But hey, to each their own, right?
I hate dirt and being dirty, but my kids definitely do not. I guess it's a good thing. I'm just constantly wiping them down and making them wash hands LOL
Married: 6/27/2008
DS: 3/14/2010 Planned, PG first try
M/C 6/2012
DD: 4/22/2013 Planned, UnDx Infertility, PG on our own
BFP: 10/28/2016 Unplanned, HUGE SURPRISE!
M/C 12/12/2016
BFP: 10/27/2017 Unplanned, HUGE SURPRISE
EDD: 7/2/2018
But who knows. July is beautiful here and not too hot - though we are hoping our landlord will put in AC before the summer. That's the ony thing stressing me out about giving birth in July right now.
I keep having dreams he will be here at the end of June, but it's clearly a dream as I know the first one is usually late.
The book talks about the "forth trimester" and trying to ease the baby into the world. It also revolves around the mother and how important self-care and proper nutrition is. It stems from some Asian cultures in which families come together when a baby is born and take care of the mom as well as the baby full time. Again, a lot of information may not work for me, but I still find the book very valuable.
One thing I really like is the book's approach to nutrition, focusing on easily digestible foods to help the digestive system and GI tract post partum.
After those two weeks I felt so much better and I was able to get into the Christmas spirit and focus on that, in addition to DS, so it was nice to have something to do.
Who knows what will happen this time - will I be early again, go full term, or be overdue? Will I feel differently after birth since it’s my second, or because it’s summer? Will I feel I have to “do more” since I will have a 20 month old? I’m going to see how it goes. But thankfully I have a great support system so I know they’ll take cues from what I need and help me through it.
So, TL;DR, I am all for a dedicated period of time for “rest” and respecting the fourth trimester, if that is what works for you!
Lab Mom (x2): Sept/Oct 2014
Married: August 2015
DS: Nov 2016 (36w)
Baby H #2: July2018 (Team Pink!)
My UO is that I hate the threads where you "need" to copy the questions into your response. 99% of the time I'm on mobile and that's a PITA in my UO.
I just want to point out that taking care of yourself, for some women, is getting out and about.
I was in bed and around the house for two days. Then, we had to go out to take care of a tongue and lip tie on the third day. After that, I had a little bit of "baby blues" and I would be weepy and sad during the day unless I went out of the house. For me, I needed to feel normal and like myself, which meant putting on pants and makeup and getting out of the house. I feel like it's a waste to put on makeup if I'm just staying home, and putting on makeup and pants and staying home isn't the same thing.
So I went out and about almost every day. To the library or just to get a couple items at the store. It was important for me. I wore her a lot and even in the car seat, people never tried to stick their heads in. And she was breastfed, and breastfed babies tend to get sick less. She never did get sick from any of that.
And yes, by "rest" I mostly mean not straining myself, making too many plans, or committing to things too soon. I should add I tend to overcommit to things and pack my schedule and then getting anxious about it and regret it , so I've been working on doing the opposite!
Due to DH's work we have had very busy social schedules which we love but we already know that's going to change with the babe (although luckily everyone around me is popping babies out these days!!). I know my mom is excited to be here because she lives in another country and this is her first grandchild so imagine that...but she is making arrangements to be in her own place so she won't necessarily feel like imposing since our place is too small for 3 adults!
I know that the "staying in" after birth is kind of a popular new age-y thing and more common in certain cultures. However I'd like to point out that this concept stems from a time when we did not have the medical care, sanitation or other luxuries that we do now. Women were at a huge risk for infection and similar complications. Therefore staying at home or in bed for a month were rational precautions.
By no means I'm going to be in bed the whole time but I definitely don't want to feel pressured to do things and see people and go out to eat just because I'm healthy enough to do it (IF that ends up being the case-let's hope so) and/or the babe is doing well. I'm getting nuggets of information from different resources and will do what works for us based on how things go. 26 weeks to make my head explode with information, lol.