Baby Shower Thread

charlestonchew · January 2018

I think I'm going to go ahead and start this cause I see people posting about showers already. This is the thread for all things showers. Planning, ideas, pictures, etc. Should we sticky this?

lincbeesmom · January 2018

Personally I think we have a lot of stickies and i have to scroll through all of them to get to new threads since I’m always on the mobile app. Just my opinion!

Not sure what to contribute in here since my niece and SIL are planning the shower but she asked what food I wanted. I told her easy snacks like chips and dip, cheese and crackers, fruit, etc.

Is anyone having meals or just snacks?

charlestonchew · January 2018

@lincbeesmom Mine will probably be in March so we might barbecue and have some lunch. I'm fine with letting people drink too cause I feel like showers can be boring for guests.

JNCPro3130 · January 2018

@lincbeesmom, all the baby showers I've been to have all had snacks. If I remember correctly, at DS's shower we had fruit, cheese & crackers, chocolate dipped pretzels, cupcakes, and juice.

abhphilly · January 2018

Ours is going to be March 3 (I'll be 31 weeks), at our house, planned by my wife's cousins. I'm excited to know that much! But, that's all I know so far. Hehe.

jenbabymama · January 2018

I'm planning just snacks too. I'm also thinking February or March. I'd rather do it sooner rather than later but February is kind of dreary and March and spring always feel so joyful and optimistic about what's to come.... What do you all think about opening the presents at the shower? Yay or nay? I hate opening presents in front of other people but if people are excited about what they got me and love this tradition then I guess I'm up for it.

JNCPro3130 · January 2018

@jenbabymama, I'm kind of old fashioned but I think you should open your gifts. Showers are gift giving events so I always expect that presents will be opened.

lincbeesmom · January 2018

@jenbabymama I opened mine at the party for DS. People like to see all the little outfits and that you acknowledged receiving their gifts. I actually think it’s weird when people don’t open gifts at things like that.

suchaglencoco · January 2018

Our showers typically have light snacks and then a full blown meal followed by cake.
I also think gifts should be opened at the showers. People took time to pick out a gift, wrap it, and bring it to a 3 hour party where they make small talk with people they may or may not know, so they deserve to see their gift opened.
Honestly, I hate being the center of attention when I'm opening gifts, but people tend to focus on the gift more so than the person opening it. We also had a gift bingo going on so people focused on the gift and then tried to find the gift on their bingo card. That helped take off some focus from me.

charlestonchew · January 2018

@jenbabymama all the showers I've been to have opened gifts and one I went to the only event was opening presents and didn't have games or anything. I think its boring personally but people seem to like it.

I think mine will be towards end of march because my moms birthday is the 17th and that would be unfair.

mileswithmyles · January 2018

My bff is throwing me a sprinkle, probably March 10 or 11. We were going to nail down the date when she gets back this week. Other than that, I don’t think I’ll be much involved with the details. She’s a pretty awesome party planner and we’ve been friends since we weren’t 12, so she knows everything about me.

lincbeesmom · January 2018

Inspired by something I read about in the April 2018 baby shower thread, I don’t like the books instead of cards idea. It’s basically telling all your guests to spend and extra 6 or 7 dollars when they could have gotten away with buying you a 99¢ card. The argument that cards just get thrown away isn’t really valid because you could keep the cards! I have cards from my last baby shower, all of DSs birthdays etc. I like looking back and seeing who attended, etc.

charlestonchew · January 2018

@lincbeesmom HATE that. I hate it because it's you trying to dictate what someone brings or buys for you. I hated it as a gift buyer because I'm like, what if they get 3 of the same books. Hate it so much. I've been to one shower that tried that and I just refused and brought a card. And only like 2 people brought books and it was awkward.

mileswithmyles · January 2018

@lincbeesmom agreed! I save all my cards and it’s fun to go back and look at them. I actually just looked at ours from DS’s shower because I found the box while moving his room.

JNCPro3130 · January 2018

@lincbeesmom, I agree! In fact, the last shower I attended they asked for a book instead of a card. I got my friend a bunch of things (swaddles, bath towels, bath toys, etc). I got her a card with a sweet message inside instead of a book. I think it's a bit much to ask.

doubleblessings1124 · January 2018

Agree about NOT asking people to bring a book vs card as well as a pack of diapers for a raffle. I've seen that a lot. I've never been to any shower where gifts weren't opened. The one my family is throwing me they plan to do a game during it like baby bingo. My sister is also doing a fun trivia game that has funny scenarios/questions about hubby and I as babies and they have to guess which one. For food they are going to do deli wraps, fruit, salad and snacks etc and dessert variety. I'm lucky to be having 3 showers- family, in laws then lastly a casual joint friends/co-workers one. Mine will all be early, 23-27 weeks. But with twins...plus I work every other weekend so didn't have much dates open. I'm glad to have them early. I've heard too many stories of friends being 8/9 months pregnant at theirs and miserable then have to rush and make returns, open stuff, wash etc. Also as a NICU nurse I've seen moms sad they have to leave their baby's bedside to go to their planned shower because baby arrived early. Not to mention parents who didn't have anything ready at home. Just never know what can happen.

charlestonchew · January 2018

@doubleblessings1124 What don't you like about the diaper raffle? I was a guest once at a shower that did that and really liked it. I thought it was smart. And it wasn't being told what to bring like the book thing, it was just an option.

And leaving child in NICU to go to planned shower? I would just say have it without me.

doubleblessings1124 · January 2018

@charlestonchew I felt it was asking a lot to bring a pack of diapers and a book in addition to whatever gift you are bringing. I think if someone wants to bring diapers in general they will. And I've seen practically no one brings them when they do ask.

doubleblessings1124 · January 2018

@charlestonchew Thats nice your shower invite was worded as a suggestion, mine was similar to the book where it was telling you to. I think people need to be careful wording things

charlestonchew · January 2018

@doubleblessings1124 Definitely agree about the wording. The invite was kind of like "bring a pack of diapers if you would like to be entered in a drawing for a gift card!" I thought that was great and plan to do the same.

charlestonchew · January 2018

Does anyone have any idea on time of day if it's a Saturday? Would 11 or 12 be too early or maybe 1 or 2?

bjkay22 · January 2018

@charlestonchew FTM here but I think generally it depends on what you are serving. If it’s finger food, I would think after 1 is best. That was kind of the rule of thumb for bridal showers in some dumb etiquette book I read. My SIL had brunch type food at her shower and at it at 10:30 AM and I really liked that. I felt like I still had my day left after it was over.

alli392 · January 2018

My MIL and SIL are throwing me a traditional one but I really hate being the center of attention and opening gifts in front of everyone. So I told my mum that I wanted whatever they were doing for her side of the family to be more of a “celebration” than a shower. People can still bring gifts and we’ll have food but we’re going to do a cute onesie craft where we have onesies of all sizes and iron designs people can make for the baby. So rather than games people can be a little more relaxed and hang out more as opposed to it being structured. I’m really relieved. The people who planned bridal showers for me did a great job but It was my least favorite event of getting married even though I was really grateful.

sbaby2019 · January 2018

I totally agree with @bjkay22. The time will usually indicate the food amounts. If you do 11-12ish then people will expect lunch whereas if you do later then they will likely eat lunch and come for snacks.

lincbeesmom · January 2018

charlestonchew said:

Does anyone have any idea on time of day if it's a Saturday? Would 11 or 12 be too early or maybe 1 or 2?

We’re doing 2 pm

oywiththepoodlesalready · January 2018

@charlestonchew if you are serving lunch, then 11 or 12 would be fine. If it is just snacks, 1 or 2 would let guests know that there won't be a meal at the shower. For my SIL, I did a shower with lots of finger foods and cupcakes. We started at 1pm and per SIL request the intent was for people to be able to mingle and visit so the finger foods were perfect. I know the older generation likes to have a meal, I should clarify that this shower was for friends, the family shower was at 12pm and included a lunch.

oywiththepoodlesalready · January 2018

@charlestonchew regarding diaper raffle, it can add up to a lot of money in addition to a gift. I've also noticed that most parents have a specific brand of diapers that they plan/want to use and most people don't pay attention to that so you end up with random brands and sizes.

@allie0320 I felt the same way about my bridal shower so for our baby shower we did a couples shower so DH had to sit there and open with me. It made it so much better having two of us and went way faster because as one of us was handing a gift off, the other was already opening. I do think that people like and expect to see all the gifts at showers.

BertieMeetsGertie · January 2018

I’m not sure how my family shower is going to go. DH and I live 16 hours away from our families, so we would have to fly. But that also complicates things because I’m not paying to ship a bunch of stuff to our house. So, we’re either not going home for a shower but having the family throw us an “away” shower (I.e., just send us gifts in the mail) or if we fly back, they will have to only bring small stuff that we can check in a bag or give us gift cards with a picture of whatever they want us to buy. It’s so complicated!

tincupchalice · January 2018

My first shower was traditional at my parents house, gifts opened, food, etc.

My second featured an axe-throwing competition.

JNCPro3130 · January 2018

@tincupchalice, hahaha I'm going to need a story to go along with the axe throwing competition at a baby shower! I've heard of a lot but not that!

bwow615 · January 2018

I personally don't mind the book instead of a card, some of the fancier cards cost the same if not more than a simple board book. I have books that we received at DS's shower that the guests wrote notes in for us. It's nice to pop open a book and see the notes.

arteduc8 · January 2018

I'm firmly in the camp that it's awesome to ask for books instead of cards. Like @bwow615 said, there are many options for books (small board books from places like TJ Maxx or Amazon) that are way less than a lot of cards cost. We asked for books for our shower for DD and people loved getting her one of their favorite books. DD has a stocked bookcase now that she "reads" books from everyday multiple times a day. It is amazing and she loves her books. She got so many fun books that I never would have found on my own that she adores. I kept cards from my wedding and they are in a box collecting dust in my basement. DD uses her books everyday. I think it's money well spent IMO vs. cards.

cups4 · January 2018

But it's still extra money you are asking people to spend at an event, that is a gift giving one, that you have most likely already given your registry to direct what types of gifts you would like. I know some cards cost the same, but I am not someone who buys $5 cards anyway. I'm sure you have loved all the books you got as cards, because they are an extra gift you wanted.

lincbeesmom · January 2018

@cups4 my thoughts exactly. IMO that’s what libraries are for. I just don’t like telling people how to spend their money. And once your kid outgrows those books, there go all those sweet notes too. To each their own I guess.

jenbabymama · January 2018

Thanks, ladies! I will definitely open my gifts at the shower.

Also, what games or activities have you enjoyed at baby showers? Or which ones do you think the guests enjoyed? I definitely want to do " tips for new parents" on index cards and "who knows mommy the most".

lincbeesmom · January 2018

@jenbabymama we did one where everyone had to cut a piece of yarn the length that they thought I was around my belly (don’t know if that wording makes sense). Whoever guessed my circumference the closest won. Not ideal if your self-conscious about your size but fun to see people be totally wrong.

charlestonchew · January 2018

@jenbabymama I've heard and seen a lot of people do like a bingo card when opening gifts. I have been to multiple showers who do the candy bar in the diapers and I don't actually hate it but a lot of people say they do.

I am on the same page as @cups4 about the books. Do not tell me how to spend my money and it is way too stressful for me because I wonder if they will get the same book multiple times. And honestly, I don't even always get a card because I know people throw those away. I just write from on the bag.

sandbar517 · January 2018

My two cents: I agree with other people that said that time of the shower and food sorta go hand in hand. If you have a party (shower or otherwise) at a typical meal time, people expect a full meal. I went to a birthday party a few months ago that started at 5:00 pm and all they had were chips/pretzels and cake. So disappointing. As for the diaper raffle, my MIL did one for my shower and said something similar to what was mentioned, "Bring a pack of diapers if you'd like to be entered in a raffle" sort of thing, and we had a lot of people participate-I don't think we had to buy diapers for at least a few months after they were born, and we had twins so that was a lot of diapers. I did end up with one or two packs of "off" brands, but for the most part people just bought the ones included on my Target registry, or other name brands. (for FTM, I still firmly believe that up and up brand diapers are the best ones available.)
I agree that asking for cards instead of books is annoying, and if you want books, just put some on your registry. That being said, if you really want to do it, try to present that as an option as well, like "If you would like to help us build Baby's library, write a note inside your favorite childhood book instead of buying a card!" or something like that. Usually if I get an invitation that includes it I just kinda side eye it and go buy a card anyway, but I don't get angry or annoyed or anything.
Games: Generally I hate games. For my shower, we set a timer and whoever's gift I was opening when it went off got a little door prize, nothing big or extravagant-I think it was $5 starbucks gift cards or something like that and we did 3 or 4 of them, maybe. And that was it. I think the candy bar in the diaper game is disgusting, and I think the general consensus is that no one *really* likes playing games. I think the baby story one that someone mentioned (sorry, I can't find the post now) sounds really cute or asking for advice, but otherwise I think games should just be skipped.
@bertiemeetsgertie That is complicated. There's really no good way to word that you just want money or small gifts on your invitations, so maybe just don't put anything about your registry on your invitation and hope that people will ask when they RSVP so they can spread it by word of mouth.

tincupchalice · January 2018

@JNCPro3130 Hahaha! No super awesome story - I'm just really outdoorsy and so everyone figured it would be fun to just do a picnic sort of thing up on the mountain and throw axes around!

charlestonchew · January 2018

My bitchy is showing again when I say this but I think it's important to note the people who like the books instead of cards are the gift receivers and the people who hate it are the gift givers.

bwow615 · January 2018

@charlestonchew that's funny. But I actually don't mind buying books, it's nice to know that the book will get some use, and I like to find little cute ones that usually have some sort of meaning behind them or sentimental value.

Want a personalized experience?

Baby Shower Thread

Re: Baby Shower Thread

Choose Another Board

Search Boards