Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Weekly Randoms│11/20
I ordered a sweatshirt from a shop on Etsy two weeks ago that says "the turkey isn't the only thing in the oven." I had to have a custom listing made so we had multiple messages back and forth and I asked if I would be able to get it before Thanksgiving, even offered to pay for rush shipping. She said I would get it and I didn't need to rush it. I leave on Wednesday afternoon to travel to WI for family events and IT HASN'T EVEN SHIPPED YET! I am going to be legit pissed and demand a refund/return if I don't get it in time because it is kind of specific to this weekend! I politely messaged her asking if she can provide an update because maybe USPS hasn't updated the tracking info because there is a tracking number but it still says awaiting item for shipment.
On another note, I also kind of don't want to tell people yet. I had an ultrasound (two actually) and everything looked good, solid heartbeat both times but I still have this anxiety that something went wrong. I really wish I could have another u/s right before telling more people to make sure everything is still ok in there. Not that I wouldn't want their support if something did go wrong, I mean were talking about telling my in-laws and my dad and his wife, but I would just be heartbroken to have them get excited and then take that away. Also I don't really like people being excited for me. I'm not exactly excited. I'm terrified that everyday I have done something wrong and that will be that. I don't like having all of the responsibility on me. I don't think I will be excited until it is in my arms.
Sorry for the novel. I guess I need a Monday BF.
DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
TTC #2: 12/2019
Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18
Also, I restarted NaNoWriMo yesterday and wrote a hefty 8400 words in one day! I'm proud of myself.
This morning I'm having some twinges on my left side. I'm hoping I just to rest. I pretty much cooked, cleaned and entertained all weekend.
Its weird this is my first time not having an appointment for weeks, as I've been to the doctor ever week since my BFP. While I'm happy to not have issues warranting appointments anymore, its nerve wrecking to wait another month to see the baby.
Lastly, I want DH to just tell me how he wants to find out about the gender! He's being so nonchalant about it, and I feel like at the last minute he's going to change his mind. I'd like us to find out together, but when they call with the results (next week most likely) I don't want to be like "let's just wait until X date/ until this happens" I can't wait that long. So if he wants to be surprised together we need to set up NOW. I'm not going to be able to wait for someone else to put it together.
TTC: 08/2017 EDD: 6/11/2018 FTM
First Son - born 2013
Third Son - due June 9, 2018
DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
TTC #2: 12/2019
Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18
LOL Pregnancy dreams.
First Son - born 2013
Third Son - due June 9, 2018
@krashke I've been having similar thoughts. its been a wk and ahalf since our last ultrasound and I've been all 'oh no, what if something happened since then! and we already told DS!' I'm starting to think these thoughts won't go away till movement is felt often.
DS: born oct 2012
TFAS: BFP #1 aug16. miscarriage sept16
BFP #2 nov16 MMC dec16. d&c jan17
BFP #3 sept17 EDD 5/31/18
fingers crossed for our rainbow baby
First Son - born 2013
Third Son - due June 9, 2018
Married March 2016
DD: born 7.22.16
DS EDD: 6.23.18
@miz_liz thank you!
DS: born oct 2012
TFAS: BFP #1 aug16. miscarriage sept16
BFP #2 nov16 MMC dec16. d&c jan17
BFP #3 sept17 EDD 5/31/18
fingers crossed for our rainbow baby
Married March 2016
DD: born 7.22.16
DS EDD: 6.23.18
DS: born oct 2012
TFAS: BFP #1 aug16. miscarriage sept16
BFP #2 nov16 MMC dec16. d&c jan17
BFP #3 sept17 EDD 5/31/18
fingers crossed for our rainbow baby
DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
TTC #2: 12/2019
Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18
Married March 2016
DD: born 7.22.16
DS EDD: 6.23.18
Me: 30 | DH: 34 | DSS: 14 | DS: 4
PG #2, EDD 10/12/2023
Edit- found the board and am caught up!
But the next night he brought it up on his own and asked if the baby was still in my belly. And wanted to know when his baby would come out. And if my belly has gotten any bigger. And he’s kissing my belly and stuff daily now. Which is cute. He thinks he/she will come out of my belly button. Haha. I need to work with him on that as we get closer.
But hes also being almost purposely more rough with me/my belly since he found out. Wanting to jump on my belly, kicking, hitting, etc. which is really not normal behavior for him. So I’m kind of worried about that. Like is he really trying to hurt the baby?
I will need to start working with him more on age appropriate specifics of it since we are planning a home birth and there is a chance he may be awake if I don’t give birth in the middle of the night. So I want him to be prepared.
After we announce to everyone this weekend, I will start working with him on knowing that the baby is actually in my uterus, not my belly - but for now I won’t correct it since I know this weekend when people are taking to him about it, he will say it’s in my belly (and so will they).
DS: born oct 2012
TFAS: BFP #1 aug16. miscarriage sept16
BFP #2 nov16 MMC dec16. d&c jan17
BFP #3 sept17 EDD 5/31/18
fingers crossed for our rainbow baby