PAIF graduates - New Mommies - September

Tulips29 · September 2017

We were strict with visitors. We only let parents/siblings come over during the first month. No one else was allowed. After 1 month we let friends come over individually but not in large crowds. Always asked everyone wash their hands as soon as they walked into the house.

JWatt5 · September 2017

Defiantly all about the hand washing and hand sanitizer. I have sanitizer everywhere and use it myself a lot. We've only had immediate family hold him. Our best friends came over but only the girls held him - we were also strict with those who smoked. My In laws and father know they also need a clean shirt if they plan to hold the baby. With flu season coming - I need to remind myself to ask even my mom to wash up quick.
I'm sad to not be going to the cottage for thanksgiving but someone is always sick and with it being the beginning of October (Canada) he won't have any shots.

2legbaby · September 2017

@janejane-2 our sleep consultant recommended the lectrofan (we have plug in and portable version).it doesnt 'loop' like the others we jad that do lights and lullabies etc and you will not be driven crazy by the sound looping!

Congrats @omarismyhomeboy!

Stars2016 · September 2017

Hi ladies! I'm so happy to be joining you over here on this board! Weston is 3 weeks and it seems like time is already flying by. Things have been going well, sleep is our main issue. We were having a lot of trouble getting him to sleep at night and he also needed to constantly be held to sleep, but that is slowly getting better. However, he is now getting really bad congestion in his nose and chest when he sleeps and sounds horrible. The doctor told us this was normal and suggested elevating him to sleep, using a humidifier, using a nose frida, and saline solution. We tried all of that but it does not seem to do much. His breathing and sounds get so loud it keeps me awake and I usually end up getting him up because it makes me nervous. Does anyone else have this problem?

janejane-2 · September 2017

@Stars2016 - congratulations!!! One of my twins had the same issue. Pediatrician made the same recommendations which we followed and they didn't really work. The congestion basically disappeared around 16(ish) weeks. It initially worried me too and I was hoping that there was some basic procedure where the dr.'s could clear it but nope. I actually forgot how bad his congestion was until I read you post but I feel for you. He's a twin and his twin didn't have the issue so it was that much more prominent to us. I was afraid he couldn't breath and the humidifier with the Vick liquid while clearing everyone else up didn't seem to help. Hang in there.

omarismyhomeboy · September 2017

Thank you all so much- I really appreciate it

for what it's worth, I have generalized anxiety disorder to begin with so its definitely not out of the ordinary for me and its something DH and I are definitely watching.

Stars2016 · September 2017

@janejane-2 Thanks for your response! I'm glad to know it's normal and that there will eventually be an end in sight.

tiffanyw1783 · September 2017

Ok ladies, I need recommendations for bottle warmers!! I ordered one that was great according to reviews and I hate it, it takes forever for it heat the bottle. I also bought a Munchkin one b/c I hated the one I ordered and I could buy it at Walmart. It either doesn't heat the milk or it scorches the milk!!!!!!! So aggravating!

tvh1982 · September 2017

Kettle!
Boil warm water in a kettle and put it in the fridge to cool down.
Boil water and keep it in the thermos and mix the two when needed. Soooo quick!
I do this for night feedings and on the road.

Colleen0516 · September 2017

@Stars2016 my daughter had the same congestion. She aslso snorts a lot lol I was worried for a while and they told me it's totally normal but that they will watch it. Well, it turns out she has a milk protein allergy- the congestion could have been a sign of it. She didn't show any blood in her stool until her 2 month check up. Regardless, she was fine before that. She was never visably in pain or struggling. Just keep an eye out and test her stool when you go to the ped.

Drove2u · September 2017

My daughter has a heart condition so the doctor told us to be careful going out in public too much until she had all of her RSV vaccines. But we allowed friends and family to visit after two weeks and only asked them to wash their hands and of course not to come if they feel sick. It was difficult for us to avoid public places with her so we still took her out and would just use the "hood" on the stroller to cover her. She's now almost 9 months and hasn't gotten sick yet. Knock on wood. Her heart has been improving slightly but we find out more this Thursday.

tvh1982 · September 2017

Crossing my fingers for you for Tuesday @drove2u!

JWatt5 · September 2017

@tiffanyw1783 - I got the Advent one. Little more money but defrosts froze milk, heats bottles, food and does it evenly. I was using the kettle but this makes sure things are evenly warmed (water circulates) with a timer. Less fuss.

@Drove2u - hope all turns out ok. My best friend had this with her little guy. He's a year now and they are doing great. She just had to be cautious.

Drove2u · September 2017

Thanks @jwatt5 and @tvh1982 I think the only thing we skipped was a kids birthday party when she was only two months old. We just didn't want her being around so many kids before her RSV vaccines were done. But otherwise we take her everywhere and do everything with her. We want her to experience life even though she is only 8 months. Ha!! But we also don't have help unless I'm at work three days a week and we refused to stop our lives just because we have a baby. We've modified a little of course but we just take her with us and it's been great!

latershrader · September 2017

Hi all! This is my first post on the new mom's PAIF board. Eli was born just about 2 weeks ago. We've had a rough time breastfeeding. I had a lactation consultant come over last week and she got us started with a supplemental feeder system. It's been very difficult to use but we are trying. Otherwise things are going well. DH went back to work today so it was a long day. But no major issues. Hope everyone is having a great Monday!!

tiffanyw1783 · September 2017

@JWatt5 how long does it take for the warmer to heat milk? And does it fit a wide array of bottles? One of my girls only takes Dr Browns and the other doesn't like skinny nipples so she does avent or occasionally Tommee Tippee bottles.

kelrauh · September 2017

@tiffanyw1783 - I am a horrible mom and I do the old fashion microwave way. 10 seconds and shake really well. After waking up with 2 at night I called it quits on the warmers. The biggest danger is hot spots, but if you shake it really well they go away. I couldn't stand waiting 5 minutes with a baby who is screaming waking up the other one.

tiffanyw1783 · September 2017

@kelrauh to be honest, at night I do that too if I don't get up right when one of them starts fussing! One of my twins is very laid back and basically just fusses when she's hungry. The other one screams like someone is shoving needles under her fingernails within 10sec of waking up if she's not fed right then! I definitely don't think you're a bad mom. If you think about it, warmers haven't been around very long and all those babies that were fed with bottles out of the microwave are probably perfectly fine!! My sister made fun of me for going through all of that with the warmers, her youngest child is 11 and oldest is almost 16. She only had the microwave for warming and her kids survived.

Drove2u · September 2017

One of my friends who has older kids told me she never warmed bottles because then they get used to it and sometimes you're out and just won't be able to warm them. So we've been giving V room temp bottles since she's been born and it's been great. She doesn't eat anymore at night but when she did I would prepare the bottles the night before with just water and take the formula upstairs with me. Basically I did as much prep work as I could. If you're breastfeeding or bottle feeding with breast milk this is probably harder to do.

tvh1982 · September 2017

No bad mum @kelrauh. I actually use warm tap water too.
Lately I have boiled water in the night bottles and one already cooled down and I sleep with it under my pj's. Sometimes even with the formula in it. The bottle has the right temperature and I don't really need to wake up.
Mind you, my LO is 10,5 months and not a newborn

Welcome @latershrader, and congratulations!
I never managed the breastfeeding, all I can say 'hang in there, crossing my fingers it'll get easier and remember "enough is enough, don't let it take over how you feel". '
Sending good vibes your way

ale9687 · September 2017

@kelrauh def not a bad mom! I only use my bottle warmer to sterilize new nipples. Ds takes most bottles room temp but he's also taken them cold from the fridge. If I'm taking a bottle from the fridge I'll stick it in my cleavage or pocket while I change his diaper and then he takes it.

JWatt5 · September 2017

@tiffanyw1783 - it takes about 5mins and fits all sizes (we have the wide and narrow). I usually pop it in before a diaper change or something but honestly except for Parker's night time bottles I don't always leave it in there the whole time. Parker takes his top ups straight from the fridge and doesn't seem to care (and then he stays awake for his bottle too).

tiffanyw1783 · September 2017

I just wanted to put this out there, b/c I just learned it. I've been feeling kinda sickly so I decided to increase my vitamin C over the last few days. I can't afford to get sick with 6 week old twins. Well I noticed yesterday and today that I'm not getting as much when I pump as usual. So I did some investigating and apparently excessive amounts of Vitamin C can decrease your supply, or this is what I read online. Just an FYI.

JWatt5 · September 2017

@tiffanyw1783 - thank you!! I'm always on the watch for anything that can hurt my supply because I pump exclusively. Sounds like when you get a cold - it's like being pregnant, not much good you can take.

omarismyhomeboy · September 2017

@latershrader yeah girl, breastfeeding is rough. I quit direct nursing and I'm exclusively pumping. Best of luck to you in whatever you decide. As long as Eli is getting fed, it will all be fine

Question about the babies start sleeping a bit better at night? My June is a little over 2 weeks. She is an OK sleeper until about 3:30 or 4 am and then she is up! I don't know if I am doing something wrong or if this is just how it is until she is older.

ale9687 · September 2017

@omarismyhomeboy from my experience that's normal. The first stretch of sleep is nice and long then it's unsettled/restless sleep. I think they just need to learn to get themselves relaxed again and back into a nice deep sleep. Some things that helped were no eye contact, no talking, no lights, really no stimulation

LynnNJ · September 2017

I haven't posted in a while, but finally have a chance to check in. Dylan was 8 months old on the 13th. Congrats to all the new moms!

After reading about all of the feedings, I remember it well. Although I am married, my husband really was not very involved. He was working a lot at the time and there was other stuff going on. After going through a panic after a couple days at home, I figured out what I was doing and honestly I felt like I was the only person who knew Dylan well enough to know what he wanted.

Because Dylan had lost a lot of weight, I often had to wake him every 3 hours to feed him (or when he cried the food) . Then I hoped he'd go back to sleep so I could sleep. In the beginning of the feeding, I had to try to keep him awake. I was breastfeeding and supplementing with formula. Feedings would take forever. After a few days, I knew I had to flip things around so that I'd use formula for most feedings and would nurse when I could. That was the only way I could get through it, get any sleep, and stay sane. Although he didn't do much, I would ask dh to feed him so I could shower. That was the only way I felt like I could get away. So of course, I didn't have much of a supply after that, but I tried hang on as long as I could, even when he would get just drops milk from me. I switched to 100% formula after 2 months. I was a little sad, but enjoyed him looking into my eyes as he took the bottle. It was really sweet, so we still had a nice bond.

After the first week, I was tired but was no longer feeling a constant panicked feeling and crying. After 2 weeks, I felt like myself and the pain from the c-section was basically gone. I started to develop a routine and started to notice patterns with the feeding times. I would be up most of the night, but noticed that Dylan would sleep longer stretches as it was closer to dawn. Between then and noon was when I caught up on sleep.

At about 3 or 4 weeks, I tried to schedule his feedings so that I'd feed him every 2 to3 hours during the day. If he didn't wake up on his own in the middle of the night, I'd wake him after 4 hours (if I was lucky to have him sleep that long.) I was more worried or him losing weight, so had to keep up with the feedings.

Once he was on track with his weight, I let him sleep as long as he wanted at night. I was lucky when he slept 4 hours. That eventually became 5 hours. I would still wake him during the day. I was trying to get him on a schedule. When he was 8 weeks old, I moved him to his crib. Soon, he started sleeping 5 to 6 hours. Many times, I'd hear crying, but when I'd get to his room, I'd notice that he was actually not really awake. By the time he was 10 weeks old, he was sleeping from 11 pm to 5 or 6 am. From there we started getting on a schedule that shifted around for a while, but he was sleeping longer and longer at night.

I tried warming the bottles in the beginning by running them under hot water for a while. I noticed that the bottles were still cold and D didn't seem to care. So I would usually give him the bottle after made it or would take it out of the fridge when I was getting ready to feed him. He still took the bottle, (and read that it's just a matter of preference) so I continued doing that.

He started daycare in August (at 6 months) and I went back to work (teacher) a couple weeks ago. It's been a different kind of stress, since I'm tired from beginning of the school year stuff. Although he sleeps through the night, he sometimes cries for a minute at night, but didn't fully wake up. There have been sleep disruptions because he's been getting sick from daycare. A few weeks back, he had horrible diaper rash and he was pooping like crazy, so every couple hours I had to check him in the middle of the night. Or if I heard him make a sound, (where I normally see if he stops),, I had to check his diaper. Then I had to do a couple of diaper changes over night where he'd been crying from pain. He was fine after that and would go back to sleep.

Now, he is all over the place and it's hard to change his diaper and dress him if he is extra active. So while I'm glad he's sleeping longer, there are other things that are tiring. He wasn't bothered by most of the colds, but the one right before the rash (when he was also getting his bottom teeth) was pretty bad. He wasn't drinking or eating much. He choked on his formula from the congestion and threw up the rest. Then he wouldn't drink anything. Then having him screaming during diaper changes (from the rash) and again when I tried to suction out his nose. I found ways to do it, but I just feel like the difficulty times in the beginning weeks helped me stay patient for these times.

It's so hard but so much fun at the same time. Dylan is a great baby and is usually very happy.After the first couple of months, time flies by before you know it.

JWatt5 · September 2017

@omarismyhomeboy - Parker was like that too. Around 3 weeks he calmed but then went through his 5 week mental leap (based on his due date) and we had a rough couple nights. Now he's doing well again with 3-4.5 hour stretches

latershrader · September 2017

@omarismyhomeboy Eli is the same at almost 3 weeks old. He sleeps great from about 10-1am but then is up crying/grunting until 4 or 5 in the morning. It's ROUGH! It's completely normal from what I gather. I think our problem is gas from the formula. But if I stay on top of his gas drops then he does better. Hang in there Mama!!

persnickity · September 2017

I think every baby is different, just like adults, when it comes to sleep. Some sleep great, others not so much. Some weeks for us, she sleeps in 3.5-4 hour stretches and other weeks, she's up more often because she's growing out going through a leap and needs to nurse more.

At 3 weeks, she was definitely growing and was nursing a lot more.

tvh1982 · September 2017

Babies will sleep long stretches in the beginning of the night.
So if you want a 'proper' sleep you should go down to sleep at 7/8 with them.
You could try to avoid this by giving a 'dreamfeed' at 11. As in, you pick the baby up, don't wake it! Feed it while it's sleepy and put it back. BUT this is no guarantee you get a long stretch of sleep.
A baby sleeps through the night when it sleeps 6 hours. Most babies do this from 3 months and sleep 8 hours straight from 6 months.

But those are textbooks and it just might not happen, or you are lucky and gave one that sleeps a full night from day one.

My baby thinks I'm still awesome at 10,5 months and likes to see me at least once a night. I could be annoyed by it, or just accept it. Sure it's exhausting and sometimes I think 'seriously kid, you don't need it!' But as long as she "attacks" the bottle I guess she really is thirsty/hungry...so I haven't done too much to get rid of it besides reducing the amount of formula.
She did start STTN in July, but got sick so night feeding came back, then in August she suffered from a jetlag after our USA trip, and now she just was sick again which added lots of feedings.
So I just started since yesterday with reducing the size of bottles.
I am lucky though that I'm back in bed within 10 minutes. She eats and falls asleep right away!

latershrader · September 2017

It's 4:30am on Saturday morning where I am right now. My little guy has been up for 2+ hours, not sleepy at all. This is the first week DH has gone back to work. We talked about how on the weekends he'd let me get longer stretches of sleep (more than 2-3 hours at a time) since I am doing 100% of the waking/feeding during the week. But guess what, I'm awake with the little man and DH is snoring beside me. He did wake up initially but he went back to sleep after the baby finished his bottle. And call me crazy selfish but I am so super resentful right now. Sorry for the vent/rant. Any advice on how to handle the resentment??

JWatt5 · September 2017

DH does the same thing after making the deal to help. He's finish up a bottle, try to put Parker down and when he didn't - I was getting up. We had to re establish what it meant. For us - it means you have a 3-4 hour shift. Whatever happens in that time is all for you haha. Hopefully Parker is easy peasy but if he's not - learn to deal. It took us a bit but we've gotten back in to a good place. Took a couple difficult convos and eventually a few tears from me. it's all just a huge adjustment

persnickity · September 2017

@latershrader like @JWatt5 said, you guys need to have another conversation and spell out exactly what you need. Even if that means you say for a specific length of time. Then, if YH goes back to sleep and the baby doesn't, wake YH up and make him handle it.

Drove2u · September 2017

So Viktoria at 8.5 months has some nights where she sleeps all night and other nights she may get up once. The doctor said at her six month appointment to stop feeding her in the middle of the night. He goes "you don't wake up at 3am and have pizza" I wanted to be like "you don't me" hahah but I see his point. She now drinks 8oz before bed and that's it. It took us two nights to get her off the middle of the night feedings. He also said not to feed her while she's laying in bed and we're still working on that. She won't eat in my arms anymore. :-(

Drove2u · September 2017

Also our doctor suggested the cry it out method and we just can't do it. We lasted a whole minute before going up. Most of the time she just needs her pacifier and sometimes finds it herself. When she can't we just put it in her mouth and go back to sleep. I always think it could be worst so I don't mind it too much. I also go to sleep at 9:30 and up between 6-6:45. So I feel pretty well rested most of the time.

tvh1982 · September 2017

I don't do CIO. It's their way of communicating and up to me to figure out what it is.
Of course she's playing me sometimes, I can tell by the big smile she gives me!

ale9687 · September 2017

@drove2u I do cio during naps bc he had a hard time going back to sleep after 45 min and now he cries for a second and goes right back to napping. We did let him cry once during the night and it was a disaster.

Right now A has a horrible stomach bug. His appetite is hardly there so we’re just giving him formula and pedialite little by little through the day. Hopefully we’re on the mend. The thought of dehydration is so scary. Luckily he’s not cranky at all.

LynnNJ · September 2017

I let Dylan cry for a little while, but not endlessly. I agree with @tvh1982 that there is a reason they cry. However, there is a balance between crying it out and picking him up every time he cries. That's what I try to do. When he cries at bedtime, I check his diaper again if he doesn't settle down in a few minutes. Many times after I've turned off the light and he had started crying lately, I turn on the light and his eyes are closed. He might just be trying to get comfortable and stand even seem to realize I'm there. Sometimes I sit him up for a minute or feel his forehead and feet to see if he's too warm or cold. I don't always say something, but if his eyes are open, I just say, "what's wrong?" I rarely take him out of the crib, but if I do, I usually do after he's calm. I might show him his empty bottle and ask him if he was he wants it and see if I get a reaction. However, most night I just turn the light on and use a calm voice or spin his mobile around a couple times. If I turn the light off again and he starts crying, I remind him they I'm here. If after a couple minutes the crying settles to just vocal sounds or quiet crying, I know he's good. Even if the crying escalates, sometimes if I leave the room, he'll calm down. So its just trial and error the me. He used to go to sleep without the crying, but since he's really gotten interested in exploring more, rolling around like crazy, and attempting to crawl and climb all over me, that's what he'd rather do. If he just rolls around in his crib playing and goes to sleep when he feels like it, I'm fine with that. Sometimes it works out like that. But I'm trying to teach him that I am there to figure out if something is wrong and comfort him, but it is bedtime and he need to be in the crib at that time if nothing else is wrong. This works at 8 months. Once he's a toddler or little kid, I think this is something I can stay consistent when he isn't confined to the crib and starts climbing out of bed. Some nights I end up sitting in his room longer and just look on my phone, but I don't need to interact with him much. When he had a really bad cold last month, I broke a lot of these rules and I spent more time comforting him.

If he cries or whines in the middle of the night, I listen on the monitor to see if he calms which he usually does. The only time I jumped up immediately in the middle of the night was when he had a horrible diaper rash and every diaper needed to be changed immediately.

omarismyhomeboy · September 2017

@latershrader I made the same deal with DH- and we had a bit of a hiccup early last weekend. I got worked up about it but it was honestly miscommunication so even though I was kinda pissed I was able to have a conversation with him and we figured out where things went wrong. He corrected immediately after and things have been good now. Sometimes its just a matter of reiterating and communicating better which is admittedly REALLY hard when you're exhausted and hormonal, haha. Hang in there.

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PAIF graduates - New Mommies - September

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