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Surrogacy

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Re: Surrogacy

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    I hate that we are all in this situation having to make these decisions but glad to hear you found an agency/attorney you felt comfortable with and signed a contract. The waiting hasn't been too bad, it's been a nice break from things actually. I just hope we're not left waiting too long! 

    Did you end up going with an agency or just an attorney?

    AFM- I think the metformin has started to work which I know doesn't mean much in terms of conceiving but it's nice to know my body is working somewhat correctly. Had a cycle back in July and looks like AF is making another arrival here any day 

    @liljoy-2 the costs are stomach churning for sure and like @angrybull said finding someone you know can decrease costs, it's still doesn't make it inexpensive. DH and I had to make some sacrifices in order to feel comfortable with the expense but i think it will be worth it in the end. 
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    I ended up going with a small law firm that also has their own agency (I think that's similar to what you did). The agency and law firm are one-in-the-same to me, but I guess they're technically two different entities for legal or business purposes?  Doesn't really matter to me.  But the woman who started the firm was the pioneer for developing surrogacy law in my state and has tons of experience, and I got along well with her and the 2 other attorneys that work with her.  When we left our initial consult I was overcome with a feeling of just complete relief. I remember just turning to my DH and saying "we can totally do this" and he felt the same way.

    I know it's only been a month, but I completely agree: the waiting hasn't been bad at all! For the first time in a long time I feel completely relaxed about everything. Not having the constant pressure of taking pills/shots, following a protocol or trying to figure out "next steps," or going to all those clinic appointments has been fantastic! I eat what I want, do the work outs I want, we have sex when we want - it's like being a normal person again. I'm referring to this as our "honeymoon phase" - it feels like everything is going to turn out just fine in the end, and we haven't really had to start doing any of the hard work. I know the scary stuff is coming at some point but for now all is calm.  And I really am completely at peace with the choice we made.

    The attorney said average time to match can be anywhere from 4-7 months, so we're just enjoying the break. But I know what you mean about not wanting to wait too long! I'm hoping by maybe the end of the year we'll at least be talking with potential matches. Have you had any updates on how the search for your GC is going from your attorney?

    And I'm so glad to hear the metformin is working! It's great that you're getting cycles. Has your RE measured your lining at all now that you're getting cycles? You never know - it could start to creep up.  But even if it doesn't I'm sure it's a relief to know your body is working correctly. Of course the downside is now you have to deal with AF  :D
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    No updates yet! We checked in with our attorney at the end of August but nothing new. That's great you found such a great place!! It is nice to not have to worry about appointments, pills, shots, etc

    My RE did have me come in for a scan in August but everything was still at baseline, which I figured my cycles weren't going to be 30 days but it was worth a shot. She actually wants to do a trial FET this month just to see if my body reacts any differently to the estrogen now that I'm somewhat getting cycles and possibly go ahead with a transfer if I respond well. DH thinks it's worth a shot so I'm game but don't have high hopes. It's nice knowing that if it doesn't work, we've already started the process of surrogacy so I don't think I'll be as stressed.  AF in July was fairly light so I'm guessing my lining didn't get very thick at all. 
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    ** Lurking** good to hear from both @angrybull and @mtpbadger! I know I am not in the exact same position as you ladies, but definitely cheering you on since we are also involved in this really fun part of IF that requires third parties to get our babies :) maybe we should have started a Third Party reproduction board since there are so few of us (thankfully). Anyways, just wanted to say hi and send lots of good vibes and prayers your way!
    History in Spoiler

    Age: 32 (same with DH). Together since 2006, Married June 2013 and TTC since August 2015
    Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive)
    March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN 
    June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary.
    August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN
    Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN
    January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze :(), BFN
    May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline :(
    Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid :(
    Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp
    Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated
    Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone
    Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues :(
    Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin
    Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e
    Back for # 2!
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    @jamieh2000 hello! I lurk on the donor egg cycle all the time and was so sad to see your news the other day! I'm glad that your clinic is behind you and you were able to find another donor! 


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    hello @jamieh2000! I too have lurked and followed your journey a bit. And I just have to say I am so sorry about what happened at your baseline appointment. Honestly, it made me so angry! I have a hard time understanding how other people can be so irresponsible. I know it's hard for someone who isn't IF to truly understand and be completely empathetic, but come on! Have a little decency. I think you are incredibly strong and are making the right decision, going with a known donor. I wish you tons of success - and hopefully very soon!
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    @mtpbadger and @angrybull- thanks so much for the kind words! Sometimes I still can't believe that what happened at baseline actually happened, but just hoping somehow it was part of a master plan of all of this! It looks like we should be hopefully getting our new match confirmation today! Still waiting to hear on how open the new donor is to exchanging info, but hopefully she will be. I am going to continue to lurk on this thread and really hope to see some good news for both of you ladies soon!!
    History in Spoiler

    Age: 32 (same with DH). Together since 2006, Married June 2013 and TTC since August 2015
    Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive)
    March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN 
    June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary.
    August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN
    Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN
    January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze :(), BFN
    May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline :(
    Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid :(
    Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp
    Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated
    Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone
    Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues :(
    Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin
    Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e
    Back for # 2!
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    Hello girls! I should say I found this thread so helpful! @mtpbadger thank you so much for sharing your journey step by step. I'm new to surrogacy. I know only basic information about it. Thanks to this thread it will be easier for me to search for an agencies, clinics, lawyers, etc. I wish all of you all the best with your journey! I hope you'll keep posting updates here.

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