Poll: When will you publicly announce?

Mattel · August 2017

(Hope this is okay to start, didn't think it fit anywhere else.)

Which week or milestone are you waiting for before you publicly announce (FB or another manner) your pregnancy? Or have you already announced it?

Interested to see the various responses and rationale.

We haven't decided yet so I don't yet have an answer.

knottie20260dd9310d77a0 · August 2017

12 weeks. Have told grandparents(6weeks)

lindsye · August 2017

I usually tell my parents right away (we see them every day and there's no way I could keep it from them anyway; no wine with dinner = preggo), all close family after viability ultrasound and Facebook/the universe after 12 weeks.

StephieMK · August 2017

Told our parents right away. Only recently started telling some close friends and family. I may wait until around 14wks to post on social media, as I did with DD.

Sissy42 · August 2017

We've already been telling family and close friends. If I m/c, they are the people I'd tell that news to as well.
The bigger "public" will wait until after our u/s just before 9 weeks.

irenejean · August 2017

We've told friends as we've seen them, everyone knows we've been TTC, so my not drinking would have been a giveaway. We're telling my in laws when they visit next week, I'll probably tell my mom this weekend. Had to tell my boss because I have to set my yearly goals for the fiscal year, and I'm planning to be on leave during the last quarter. I think We'll make it more public after our doctor appointment at 9 weeks, and we'll make it social media public around 20 weeks.

ngolimento · August 2017

Ok, a little bit of a long story here, but bear with me.

With my kiddo, we announced a little after first tri, because I wanted to post on our wedding anniversary, using the wine glasses we used in our wedding ceremony. During the ceremony, we mixed a white and red white together, and toasted each other with the rose. I made custom glasses for it, and we toast each other every year on our anniversary. That year, I posted a pic of the glasses with mine full of water, his full of wine, and a bottle of milk between them. So this go-around I would like to post them with a sippy cup for DD, and another bottle for the new kid.

We have already told our immediate family, so this is just for friends and extended family.

LuckyInIreland · August 2017

Told parents last week, will tell everyone else in a few days

maureenmce · August 2017

Haven't 100% decided yet, but I think we'll publicly announce on my birthday (a simple "I'm eating cake for two" post or something like that.). At that point, I'll be 14 weeks and, assuming all goes well with genetic testing and what not, I'll feel good about everyone knowing.

We're gonna tell my mom two weeks earlier because she has a visit planned then, and we'll tell our DD's godparents one week earlier because we happen to already have a dinner party planned with them. Kind of nervous about that one because there are struggles with infertility there, but they're really close friends so I'm hoping it's happy news and goes well.

But I guess the first to know outside of me and my husband will be my boss, who I'm gonna tell after a (hopefully good) ultrasound next week, so I can get all my appointments cleared.

psuxray07 · August 2017

@ngolimento that sounds really cute!

Our parents know, and just a few other family members. My coworkers know because I work in radiology, so definitely not gonna hide it there, lol. A few select friends also know. We are going to announce this weekend on facebook to the rest of our friends/family after my first ultrasound. We're going to use a picture of DS with his batman mask and cape and a shirt that says "Every superhero needs a sidekick! Mine arrives 4/2018." (He loves superheroes and just had a superhero birthday 2 weeks ago, so it fit and he had fun doing it

We told DS the night before we had the pictures done so he would know what he was posing for, haha. And apparently he wants a sister.

maureenmce · August 2017

@psuxray07 Okay the every superhero needs a sidekick thing is really cute! Making me think I should put some effort into coming up with something fun like that instead of my lazy "I'm pregnant and eating lots of cake on my birthday" idea, lol.

klburke88 · August 2017

We're thinking around the beginning of October, something Halloween related. I'll be roughly 14 weeks by that point.

riversdoctor · August 2017

I don't announce before the anatomy scan. So whenever that ends up being is when I will tell, provided all is good. Nothing on Facebook until baby is born and all is well. I've done that ever since my pregnancy with my daughter.

Tw With my first pregnancy I announced after my ultrasound at 8 weeks and miscarried the following week. Never want to go through that again. The only people who knew about my second miscarriage were dh, my 2 best friends who live across the country, and my coworkers since I took a couple days off. End tw

So far dh knows and one of my best friends. I will tell the other when I see her this weekend.

bossmom11 · August 2017

Told my mom and siblings this weekend because they were visiting. I won't see them again until Thanksgiving and it was nice telling them in person. Will tell my in laws this weekend for the same reason.

Outside of family, my running partner knows, since I have been nauseous in the morning and my pace has slowed and our closet friends (husband/wife) since we have no family in the area they would be the ones to take care of my DD in an emergency.

For everyone else, not sure. Definitely waiting on a US. Maybe doing it on MH's bday 10/22. Haven't figured out how yet.

sparklingdiamond · August 2017

My parents and a few close friends know. I am waiting until 12 weeks to tell everyone else.

whatabout2ndbreakfast · August 2017

I told my parents and sisters already, but are waiting until after the first u/s to tell DH's family. Then we will probably wait til 12 weeks to tell family and last time we waiting until 16-18 weeks to put anything on facebook

ngolimento · August 2017

@psuxray07 I love the superhero idea! So cute!

btm013 · August 2017

I told my immediate family and very close friends pretty early. The not drinking would be a giveaway! We did not tell my nieces or nephew yet. Probably after the first or second ultrasound we will tell them, neighbors and other friends. Ever since DS was born, I became much more private on social media. I got rid of my Facebook account and only have Instagram. I post maaaaybe once a month. I don't think we will do an announcement post this time around. For my first, we posted after the 20 week scan. To each their own mamas ✌

julzy · August 2017

My mom and best friend know already. I'll tell the rest of the immediate family and close friends (the ones I'd want to lean on if TW happened again) after my next appointment next Friday at 8 weeks if everything is looking okay. The rest of friends and family we'll wait until after 1st trimester is over and will likely do a cute photo with DS with something rainbow. But I also want to acknowledge the hurt some people might feel seeing it. After my last MC and the long 8 months it took to get pregnant again, I literally had a meltdown every time someone announced their pregnancy on FB. I'll prob wait awhile to post on FB and would want to write something to honor my warrior sisters still facing infertility or loss.

Dumbgurl04 · August 2017

that is a cute idea @ngolimento I love how you mixed two wines at your wedding to do your toast.

Well our parents just found out Tuesday. We waited until we had an ultrasound cause I found these picture frames that you put the ultrasound in and it has a poem about a new grand baby on the way. What's really fun is on Tuesday I had lunch with my mom and she had no idea. It was fun getting those calls from my parents and MIL with how excited they were.

For the rest of the world we are waiting until after 12 weeks, so one of the last two weeks of September. We are going to do something sort of like @psuxray07 but it will be Star Wars related. DD has a shirt that looks like Darth Vader's suit and it even has a cape. So going to have her wear that maybe give her a light saber and have a sign that says "Every Master needs an Apprentice, mine arrives April 2018". We did Star Wars announcements with DD so it just seems fitting to do them again.

viggie17 · August 2017

We probably won't do a FB announcement... however I could see getting tagged in some photos in December for an xmas gathering or something, but besides that probably not much. I have this thing about people that are friends on fb but are now more like acquaintances in real life knowing too much of my personal life lol... I know, that's weird! I may set up a custom privacy setting and only have family and really close friends on it for later on though, because we don't live that close and some of my family will go to my uncles house and his wife (my aunt in law) will show them facebook photos to get caught up on pictures of kids and stuff.

dirtyboots · August 2017

We told family at 5 weeks. Told any friends we saw after that, and made it "fb official" at 9 weeks. We are of the opinion that every life is to be celebrated and wanted to share with everyone even if, God forbid, it ends in mc. And if it it did we would we would tell everyone that news as well. We have a very supportive circle of family/friends so telling them early was what we did.

8bithearts · August 2017

Fb publicly around 20w. My bf had several losses with his ex and he's pretty nervous about it.

jodes727 · August 2017

We have told immediate family already and a couple of friends who were there supporting me during our IVF journey. We will tell extended family and close friends in a few weeks (I have a 3rd u/s next week).
Other than that, I don't think I'll do a fb announcement. After dealing with secondary infertility, I want to share our success with everyone who will listen and at the same time I want to be sensitive to others who are struggling.
We are just so excited when we do share!

hedgepig · August 2017

We are thinking we will tell family, close friends and work maybe next weekend (11 weeks), now that we've had a good U/S. We won't be doing a FB announcement, partly because we're pretty private, but also because of what @julzy mentioned - as someone who has had losses, I don't want to hurt people who may be struggling with losses or IF.

scuba_chic · August 2017

I told my 2 bestfriends and DH literally the day I got my first positive. Ended up having to tell parents, my boss and some friends around week 4 because DH and I were supposed to go with those friends to Aruba the following week. I convinced DH to still go, but my boss and our parents would have to know some good reason why I wasn't going.

As far as FB and the rest of the world, I just realized that week 20 for me falls during Thanksgiving week! Might be a fun way to post what I'm thankful for in announcement form.

mrs_massie · August 2017

We decided we wanted to keep it a secret for as long as we can this time. Two girls I work with know because one asked me if I was pregnant before I even knew if I was and then she helped me determine if the test was positive and the other announced she was pregnant days after I found out that I was, so I just had to tell her. DH and I are going on an anniversary trip for 5 days next week and the day after we get back we have another ultrasound. I will be 9 weeks 3 days and if all goes well then I'm going to buy this shit and put it on our DS and see how long it takes for everyone to read it and figure out. I think I will announce it on Facebook just because we both have a lot of family that we don't necessarily see often and its the easiest way to let them all know. But, we will probably wait till around Halloween to do that.

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angiek1 · August 2017

We told family at 8 weeks and are telling friends as we see them. I'm not making it FB official for a while because I start a new job on Friday and I haven't told the new employer. Long story, I got laid off in July and in the same month found out I was pregnant. My new company has bent over backwards to hire me and I just don't want them to freak when I tell them I am expecting.

And this brings me to my soap box. How insane is it that we fear telling our jobs about an amazing life moment?! I think the leadership team at my new company will be cool about my pregnancy, but who knows. I just hate that women getting pregnant is this awkward conversation. Guys can start a new job and announce their wife is pregnant with no worry. Women (or at least I do) have this odd guilt when I tell an employer.

Back in Feb. my aunt passed away from Lung Cancer. My previous company was drowning in work and guilted me into not going to her funeral. After that moment, I vowed to never let a company make me feel bad for having a personal life. And that I would never miss major things for any job. So I have made that resolve, but yet I'm still super nervous to let the cat out of the bag about the new baby.

whatabout2ndbreakfast · August 2017

@angiek1 I completely agree. One of my coworkers retired and another just got a new job this week, and I'm dreading telling my boss that I'm expecting.

jenotontx · August 2017

@angiek1 omg that's horrible! I can't believe they would have the audacity to ask you not to go and then they laid you off 5 months later?! That's sick... although I'm sorry to hear you got laid off it was probably a blessing in disguise.

My H and I are planning to start telling family and close friends after my first appointment next week (I will be 9 weeks). I will probably start slowly telling people overtime after that but I don't plan to tell anyone at work until after first tri. I'm also thinking about announcing to our larger extended group of friends and family in a holiday card. We would also know the sex by then so it would be a cute way of announcing it to everyone. Facebook wouls come sometime after... maybe a Christmas day announcement if people haven't already spilled the beans on there by that point. lol

irenejean · August 2017

@angiek1 that's so terrible about your previous company, goo don you for getting yourself on out of there!

Dumbgurl04 · August 2017

I feel you on that @angiek1 on not telling your boss. I'm dreading telling him, not only because I feel my work load will be lighten a lot (because it did last time) but with some of the craziness that has happen with some position movements there really isn't someone who will be able to fill in for me after I have the baby. I know legally they can't treat you differently but it still happens there is such a stigma when it comes to pregnant women working. Plus with your old job not letting you go to your Aunt's funeral is terrible I can't believe that did that to you.

angiek1 · August 2017

@Dumbgurl04, @irenejean @JJMNO1616 I'll just say - major life lesson learned about how not to prioritize a job over family.
@Dumbgurl04 @peppersmith22 - good luck on telling your work people. Hopefully it goes better than we all are anticipating

sapphires-and-diamonds · August 2017

@angiek1 So ridiculous your last company would guilt you for something like that.

So far only my sister and best friend know. I'll probably tell my parents, brother, and in-laws after we hear a HB (1st Dr appointment isn't until 9/11, but I am going to start looking for HB tomorrow with my doppler). As far as FB I don't know if I will announce. If I do it will be much later, around 24 weeks. Last time someone posted some pictures of me at my baby shower at 36 weeks and people were like ummm...whaaaat?

BarefootContessa · August 2017

DH and I may be the odd ducks here. We've told just a few close friends but no family yet. Granted, it's very early (I'm only 5w5d). DS's birthday party is this weekend as well as other Labor Day festivities and it will be so hard to dodge suspicion from everyone bc I won't have a cocktail.

We aren't ready or comfortable to announce yet. I honestly don't know when we will be. It will likely happen after our first ultrasound (9 weeks) bc this being my third baby and the fact that I'm only 5'2 means I'll be showing like woah!

whatabout2ndbreakfast · August 2017

@angiek1 Fingers crossed! I'm worried about how the team will take it. There's only 7 of us so I think I'm going to just wait it out until the 2 open positions are hired before I stir the pot haha

vannesmarshall · August 2017

@angiek1 That is awful!! It really is a shame, the way businesses make pregnant women feel. And (correct me if I'm wrong, anyone) this is mostly a US problem, as far as I know. Maternity is met woth a lot more joy from employers in other countries, I've heard.

We told my parents and brother at 6 weeks, when we were in town for the eclipse. We're going to tell my in-laws this weekend, since they're visiting us for the holiday weekend. Trying to tell everybody in person when you no longer live near anyone is hard.

We're holding off on anyone else, but I think DH has plans to eventually announce on FB with a baby carrier on his bicycle. Which I think is adorable, because he's such a cycling geek and one of the first things he told me after the BFP was how excited he was to teach his kid how to ride a bike, and get all the cool bike-dad stuff!

whatabout2ndbreakfast · August 2017

That is so adorable @vannesmarshall

turcs · August 2017

We are planning to tell immediate family next week - we will be 7 weeks. We have an out of town family wedding, and no way I will get away with not drinking
Without them knowing. For the rest of my extended family they will find out at thanksgiving (Canadian) and Like my first I won't announce on social media.

SharonKristin · August 2017

I'm trying to wait until 12 weeks to tell my family. Only my mom and my grandma know right now. I probably won't be doing a Facebook announcement. I was thinking of just having the kids hold an annoucement in their Christmas card picture that I sent out. But we will see.

scuba_chic · August 2017

angiek1 said:
And this brings me to my soap box. How insane is it that we fear telling our jobs about an amazing life moment?! I think the leadership team at my new company will be cool about my pregnancy, but who knows. I just hate that women getting pregnant is this awkward conversation. Guys can start a new job and announce their wife is pregnant with no worry. Women (or at least I do) have this odd guilt when I tell an employer.

My boss unfortunately is an older, childless women who chose to make work her life...literally. She is married, but her job is her first priority and she works 24/7 and lets everyone know she does. When she is forced to take vacation time, she lets us all know it wont be much of a vacation because she has so much work to do. I was nervous telling her because I think in the back of her mind, she expects me to be like her.

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