@DeansGirl14 I'm a FTM, so I can't speak to the actual experience of labor, but it does sound like you're being a bit naive---and I'm a runner/marathoner as well. It's like saying that because you're a runner you don't have to train for a triathlon. Sure, some stuff will cross over, but you've got to practice and work on swimming and biking, etc. I'd just say if it's really important to you to go unmedicated to not just rely on your running experience. Just my two cents.
@donehue I don't think I ever had to deal with real pain so I have no idea how to prepare myself. I also have not had any BH so I don't know what contractions feel like. I'm in for a big surprise!
@DeansGirl14 I'm a FTM, so I can't speak to the actual experience of labor, but it does sound like you're being a bit naive---and I'm a runner/marathoner as well. It's like saying that because you're a runner you don't have to train for a triathlon. Sure, some stuff will cross over, but you've got to practice and work on swimming and biking, etc. I'd just say if it's really important to you to go unmedicated to not just rely on your running experience. Just my two cents.
Well, the way I look at it is that women are supposed to "practice" meditation, right? For me though, running always was my meditation. Going to various kinds of yoga classes, for example, was never my thing. I get what you're saying, but we can't train for labor itself, only our brains. I feel fairly confident in my mental game. But also... while an unmedicated birth is my desire, it's not like, be-all end-all important to me. If it were, I'd find other ways to practice meditation and fine-tune my mental game, yes. Two things could happen though- a. due to medical complications I may have no choice in the matter or b. things could go on so long and so painfully that I give up and request medication. (I could compare this to training to finish a marathon and training to Boston-qualify, lol. I'm just looking to cross the finish line.)
@DeansGirl14, I've never done an ultra, which is likely a closer comparison I'm pretty sure I could deal with 90% of labor (everything pre-transition) if it was guaranteed to be as "short" as a marathon! A lot of my mind tricks involve counting down the miles/dividing the miles into manageable pieces and with no guaranteed/planned delivery time my left-brained mind can go to dark places. If I could just tell myself "20 more contractions and he'll be here", that would be helpful, but unlikely lol.
I can vividly remember waiting to be checked/admitted with my first. I was about 7 hours into my 12 hour labor and thought I was dying. I didn't want anybody to talk to me or touch me - I just wanted the pain to stop! I don't remember the pain with the second as vividly, but my husband swears he actually thought I was dying and that my brain is just blocking out the trauma. I do think that not knowing what labor feels like puts you at a disadvantage for preparation, and having some coping "plans" in place, even just a few, could help. It is never too late to start! The recovery was just so much better without the epidural and the memory of what natural "pushing" feels like is a feeling I am going to try and meditate on. Hoping others have some suggestions too!
@shyviolet thanks for the lemongrass suggestion. I'm really interested in aromatherapy and need to do a lot more research. I always get so caught up in deciding which brand/company to use and then give up.
@DeansGirl14 I am not a runner but was a competitive athlete in high school. I went into my labor with DS with a similar view to what you have. I was able to do it, but my labor was quick with most of it happening in the last 2 hours. I also tore pretty bad and I think part of it could have been caused by having a hard time relaxing my body. This time I want more resources to call on when I need them. I am also not big in to meditation but I find doing it a few minutes before bed worth the time. I don't get into a meditative state but I do like the deep breathing practice and clearing my mind.
@lewliv I had nothing with DS until labor started so it was all a surprise for me. The only time I wanted pain meds was during transition, but as I had previously requested, my doula let me know that is what was happening and being aware the end was close made it manageable.
@donehue I went to the local co-op to smell the different fragrances.
@shyviolet101 I can't remember if I've already said this, but that fast of a first labor is pretty crazy! No wonder you are expecting to go fast this time too.
I never had painful BH in my other pregnancies either. At least you will probably know real labor the second it hits, @lewliv
@donehue I had DS 45 min after we got to the hospital, so I have read your story with some concern. But we are only 10 min from the hospital and for me the trigger was my water breaking. Now that I know that my body goes fast we will move a little quicker. I just didn't want to be one of those people who was sent home last time.
No baby here yet, 38 weeks on Tuesday. Impatiently waiting! She's "very" engaged, in perfect position (LOA), and I'm having lots of lightning crotch and feeling the way you do right before you start the period. But also telling myself that could still mean weeks ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Anyone have insight on engagement and when labor arrives?
Home birth prep: Birth kit is here and ready, tub is inflated, and have lots of good labor food on hand (pudding, Popsicles, fruit squeezies, bone broth, etc).
You know your husband is a home birth husband when... When our midwives gave us the list of random things we should have on hand, DH saw "bendy straws" and, with a look of terror asked, "Um, what are these used for?" The MWs had a giggle explaining that they're literally just straws that make drinking easier! I can only imagine where his mind went.
Also have lots of positive affirmations that I need to find a place to hang. I emailed some of my girlfriends and asked them to send me "love notes" for labor, so those will go up as well. So excited and ready! It's like training for a race and knowing you just can't train anymore, so you just have to wait for race day.
How is everyone else doing?! Including you @lyndshurt!
Being engaged and in position is a great sign! Of course, nothing is a guarantee sign of how soon baby will come, but that's a step in the right direction. Are you still having contractions?? Sometimes prodromal labor can last for days/weeks. Hopefully that's not the case for you! Try to rest as much as you can do you're ready for game time
I am feeling behind this time. LO is not in the pelvis yet so I think I have awhile but I'm so uncomfortable already! Last time I had everything ready to go and was just waiting on a baby for the last 2 weeks (which made the mental side hard!). This time I will be grinding until this baby gets here. School is starting for the whole fam: I am figuring out a new position, DH is starting football season, and DS is starting pre-school next week (tears!). We crushed some baby prep in the past few days. I'm 37 weeks on Wednesday so the essentials need to be done by then. I want to prep freezer meals and smoothie packs but I haven't gotten to it.
Home birth prep - I have my birth kit, prepped my bed, sterilized my pump parts, & have my postpartum items mostly ready. Still need to make some padsicles. Gotta buy birth snacks! {Died at the bendy straw story haha}. I've been forming my pandora station but no birth art/affirmations yet. I'll probably just print some out that I found on Pinterest lol. We did a hypnobirthing meditation exercise at birth class on Saturday that was supposed to help you release any fears you may have. I felt like I dug deep and couldn't find any thing mentally/emotionally/spiritually that were roadblocks so that was positive. I had a breakdown around 38 weeks last time but I don't anticipate that this time (unless it sneaks up on me). I do some visualization exercises of birth and I'm feeling really good about it.
I had my baby! But my water broke at 37+3 the morning I was supposed to go for a version to try and turn her. I went to a chiropractor and was doing some exercises but she was firmly breeched, head up (just like I was as a baby) and I ended up with a c-section with an OB from the practice my midwife is in. Buuuuuut there was lots of drama between them, because the OB wouldn't wait 10 mins for my midwife to be there. (It wasn't an emergency and she could have waited.) I got none of the things that I wanted from my birth plan except a beautiful healthy baby. It was just the perfect storm of bad timing that contributed to it, but I'm a lot more at peace with it all than I thought I would be.
I had my my baby over the weekend and had a successful un-medicated hospital birth. All my breathing exercises helped because the nurses were shocked at how far along I was when I got there, for how mellow I was. It was not until I had 2 contractions really close together that she stopped the intake paper work and checked me to find I was fully dilated. My doctor was amazing and let my push on my hands and knees because I was so far along and flipping me back did not make sense. I had a moment of panic while I was pushing because I knew there was no asking for pain meds at that point. But I pulled it together focused on breathing and had her out in 4 pushes.
@mrsmatt1212 I think about 8.5 hours. I was having "gas pains" in my sleep and did not realize they were contractions until I woke up and noticed how regular they were. My labor with DS was about the same length so I was expecting it to go quick.
Congrats, @shyviolet!!! That sounds so ideal! How far along were you? I hope you are recovering nicely! I've been dying to hear successful med-free stories for inspiration.
I have felt so sick for the past week and am afraid that I won't have the strength to cope with contractions if I don't start feeling better soon. With two kids at home and a full-time job that I am trying to prep for my leave there is no such thing as rest! I've been trying to get lots of water, Vitamin C and garlic (and raspberry leaf tea, but seriously, who wants tea in August??). Luckily I am only 38w2d so fingers crossed that I feel much stronger by the time he decided to come.
@donehue so sorry you're feeling sick! Rest as much as you can, even if it's not sleep. And I have to have my RRL tea iced, I was dying drinking it hot!
My doula just sent me some pictures and I love this one of me stopping for a contraction on the way into the hospital. I probably had the baby 40mins after this was taken and you can see how calm and focused I was even then.
so i spent almost 9 hours at the birth center last night only to come home new babyless. i started having contractions at 8 last night not regular or tunable by ten they were five min apart lasting 30 seconds each. i decided to go to bed and see if they progress and try to get some sleep by 1:30 they were three min apart around a minute long so i texted my midwife and she told me wait thirty min then come up there. i take a shower DH and i head to the center an hour away. on the way there the contractions pretty much stayed the same when i got there MW checked me and i had only progressed to 5cm ( i was 4cm at my appointment earlier that day and had a membrane sweep) she told me to sleep and if they got worse to let her know by 7 that morning they were completely irregular but still painful and by 11:30 they'd stopped. MW gave me black and blue cohosh and some walking instructions to help contractions to start again.
@mrsmatt1212 and @lyndshurt Thanks, looking back at the timing I can't believe how close I am in the picture. I had just told DH I hoped when they checked I was at least 8cm because I didn't think I could be much more then that based on how calm I was.
Re: Homebirth/Birth Center Mamas
I get what you're saying, but we can't train for labor itself, only our brains. I feel fairly confident in my mental game.
But also... while an unmedicated birth is my desire, it's not like, be-all end-all important to me. If it were, I'd find other ways to practice meditation and fine-tune my mental game, yes. Two things could happen though- a. due to medical complications I may have no choice in the matter or b. things could go on so long and so painfully that I give up and request medication. (I could compare this to training to finish a marathon and training to Boston-qualify, lol. I'm just looking to cross the finish line.)
I can vividly remember waiting to be checked/admitted with my first. I was about 7 hours into my 12 hour labor and thought I was dying. I didn't want anybody to talk to me or touch me - I just wanted the pain to stop! I don't remember the pain with the second as vividly, but my husband swears he actually thought I was dying and that my brain is just blocking out the trauma. I do think that not knowing what labor feels like puts you at a disadvantage for preparation, and having some coping "plans" in place, even just a few, could help. It is never too late to start! The recovery was just so much better without the epidural and the memory of what natural "pushing" feels like is a feeling I am going to try and meditate on. Hoping others have some suggestions too!
@shyviolet thanks for the lemongrass suggestion. I'm really interested in aromatherapy and need to do a lot more research. I always get so caught up in deciding which brand/company to use and then give up.
DD#1: 5/29/12
DD#2: 1/14/15
Baby #3 on the way due 8/19/17
@lewliv I had nothing with DS until labor started so it was all a surprise for me. The only time I wanted pain meds was during transition, but as I had previously requested, my doula let me know that is what was happening and being aware the end was close made it manageable.
@donehue I went to the local co-op to smell the different fragrances.
I never had painful BH in my other pregnancies either. At least you will probably know real labor the second it hits, @lewliv
DD#1: 5/29/12
DD#2: 1/14/15
Baby #3 on the way due 8/19/17
Has anyone in this group had their baby?
For birth center/home births, how is preparation coming along?
We are getting so close!!
No baby here yet, 38 weeks on Tuesday. Impatiently waiting! She's "very" engaged, in perfect position (LOA), and I'm having lots of lightning crotch and feeling the way you do right before you start the period. But also telling myself that could still mean weeks ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Anyone have insight on engagement and when labor arrives?
Home birth prep: Birth kit is here and ready, tub is inflated, and have lots of good labor food on hand (pudding, Popsicles, fruit squeezies, bone broth, etc).
You know your husband is a home birth husband when...
When our midwives gave us the list of random things we should have on hand, DH saw "bendy straws" and, with a look of terror asked, "Um, what are these used for?" The MWs had a giggle explaining that they're literally just straws that make drinking easier! I can only imagine where his mind went.
Also have lots of positive affirmations that I need to find a place to hang. I emailed some of my girlfriends and asked them to send me "love notes" for labor, so those will go up as well. So excited and ready! It's like training for a race and knowing you just can't train anymore, so you just have to wait for race day.
How is everyone else doing?! Including you @lyndshurt!
Being engaged and in position is a great sign! Of course, nothing is a guarantee sign of how soon baby will come, but that's a step in the right direction. Are you still having contractions?? Sometimes prodromal labor can last for days/weeks. Hopefully that's not the case for you! Try to rest as much as you can do you're ready for game time
I am feeling behind this time. LO is not in the pelvis yet so I think I have awhile but I'm so uncomfortable already! Last time I had everything ready to go and was just waiting on a baby for the last 2 weeks (which made the mental side hard!). This time I will be grinding until this baby gets here. School is starting for the whole fam: I am figuring out a new position, DH is starting football season, and DS is starting pre-school next week (tears!). We crushed some baby prep in the past few days. I'm 37 weeks on Wednesday so the essentials need to be done by then. I want to prep freezer meals and smoothie packs but I haven't gotten to it.
Home birth prep - I have my birth kit, prepped my bed, sterilized my pump parts, & have my postpartum items mostly ready. Still need to make some padsicles. Gotta buy birth snacks! {Died at the bendy straw story haha}. I've been forming my pandora station but no birth art/affirmations yet. I'll probably just print some out that I found on Pinterest lol. We did a hypnobirthing meditation exercise at birth class on Saturday that was supposed to help you release any fears you may have. I felt like I dug deep and couldn't find any thing mentally/emotionally/spiritually that were roadblocks so that was positive. I had a breakdown around 38 weeks last time but I don't anticipate that this time (unless it sneaks up on me). I do some visualization exercises of birth and I'm feeling really good about it.
@shyviolet yay!!! That sounds wonderful! How long was your labor all total? So glad it went so well for you!!
I have felt so sick for the past week and am afraid that I won't have the strength to cope with contractions if I don't start feeling better soon. With two kids at home and a full-time job that I am trying to prep for my leave there is no such thing as rest! I've been trying to get lots of water, Vitamin C and garlic (and raspberry leaf tea, but seriously, who wants tea in August??). Luckily I am only 38w2d so fingers crossed that I feel much stronger by the time he decided to come.
DD#1: 5/29/12
DD#2: 1/14/15
Baby #3 on the way due 8/19/17
home new babyless. i started having contractions at 8 last night not regular or tunable by ten they were five min apart lasting 30 seconds each. i decided to go to bed and see if they progress and try to get some sleep by 1:30 they were three min apart around a minute long so i texted my midwife and she told me wait thirty min then come up there. i take a shower DH and i head to the center an hour away. on the way there the contractions pretty much stayed the same when i got there MW checked me and i had only progressed to 5cm ( i was 4cm at my appointment earlier that day and had a membrane sweep) she told me to sleep and if they got worse to let her know by 7 that morning they were completely irregular but still painful and by 11:30 they'd stopped. MW gave me black and blue cohosh and some walking instructions to help contractions to start again.
Eta: I just realized this was not the birth story thread.