PGAL Check-In - 8/3

becausescience · August 2017

Just one day late.
This is a safe space for those who are pregnant after a loss. General TW for this thread.

Image: https://media.giphy.com/media/3M4NpbLCTxBqU/giphy.gif

How far along are you?

Any appointments coming up?

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given?

becausescience · August 2017

How far along are you?
6w2d (this is my loss milestone)

Any appointments coming up?
u/s next week Wednesday, first appt with OB 8/22

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
I'm trying to remain hopeful, but the only symptoms I have really are fatigue and heightened sense of smell. I know symptoms don't mean anything, but it is hard when you're PGAL and don't have them. (or they lessen) I'm scared for the u/s next week, but also excited. So that's weird.

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given?
Just ask - the worst that could happen is that they say "No".

pghctwife · August 2017

8w today, follow up u/s after measuring small last week is this afternoon. Primarily for my peace of mind, my mw isn't worried.

Im feeling extremely terrible this morning so that helps my nerves slightly.
If we see a minimum of 1 week growth the baby will be bigger than when it stopped growing last fall (mmc measured at 7w1 and I should be at 7w2 or more).

hullabalou · August 2017

How far along are you?
10w1d

Any appointments coming up?
Ultrasound yesterday went well, I go back in another 2 weeks then will switch to every 4 weeks through second tri I think.

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
I'm doing okay. Physically still feeling like crap but my nausea seems to be calming down a little. Mentally, I go back and forth between feeling 100% calm and joyful and 100% freaked out and anxious.

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given?

The hardest part is getting started. Just a pick a place and go for it.

heatherdubrow · August 2017

@pghctwife good luck today!

How far along are you?
10 weeks today

Any appointments coming up?
Next is 8/15

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
Had a big scare yesterday with a large gush of bright red blood. Ultrasound showed a healthy baby and low lying placenta. But when it happened I just went completely stoic. Like ok, I guess this is happening again. I was really convinced that was it. I wonder when I'll feel secure in this pregnancy?

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given?

Put on your own oxygen mask first. It's so true, you can't take care of others if you don't take care of yourself.

hullabalou · August 2017

@becausescience good luck at your US next week, I hope you have a busy weekend to occupy yourself until then.

@pghctwife I hope you have a good update this afternoon!

becausescience · August 2017

@pghctwife I'll be thinking of you today.

justkeeptrying · August 2017

How far along are you?
6w3d

Any appointments coming up?
Went for bloodwork yesterday (having HCG checked weekly still). First appointment is 3 weeks from today.

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
I have lots of symptoms - mainly my nausea has picked up and I'm throwing up 1-3x per day. But I hate when people say that's a "good sign". I threw up 4x a day with both of my losses. So vomiting really doesn't make me feel better.

I also wish this first appointment was sooner. And that my OB called with results from my weekly bloodwork. I'm assuming no news is good news from her office and trusting my HCG is rising.

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given?
Not really advice. But I'm doing everything I can to stay pregnant. Taking my
prenatals, my progesterone, my thyroid meds. The rest is out of my hands and I need to just trust and have faith that I am capable of growing a healthy baby again.

GG620 · August 2017

How far along are you? 7w 4d

Any appointments coming up? 8/9/17 last u/s with RE

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here). I am doing okay. Last 2 days I have been having some (what I think) is RLP, but if freaks me out and I get so nervous. My feeling good high from the last u/s has teetered away and next wednesday seems so far away. I've surpassed 1 loss milestone, and my next is Monday. I think I will feel slightly better once I overcome that hurdle.

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given? To believe in myself. I was never very confident and I think it held me back in a lot of ways.

@becausescience I feel the same way about my upcoming u/s. I am always excited and so terribly scared at the same time. I hope the week goes quick and you have an awesome u/s

@hullabalou ahh 10 weeks! That is so exciting!

@heatherdubrow I can't imagine how you must have been feeling, but so, so glad that everything was fine. I am not sure when I will feel secure in this pregnancy either

justkeeptrying · August 2017

@becausescience, these loss milestones are hard. Mine is in 2 days for my MMC. Thinking of you and hoping your appointment goes well!

@pghctwife, good luck today!!!

pghctwife · August 2017

Thanks, all.

@heatherdubrow I missed your posts till just now, terrifying. I'm glad it's ok but omg, you can't take that fearful feeling before away. It stays with you.

Id love to know the answer too. I hope it's nt birth... I hope maybe first tri or kicks? It's my last baby and I so want to soak it all in and enjoy it.

SoraLk · August 2017

How far along are you? 6 weeks 4 days

Any appointments coming up? OB visit at the end of the month.

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
Just meh. I feel mentally and physically exhausted. I am so tired that I didn't even realize Sunday is my loss milestone. Just hope that I can make it without too much anxiety.

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given? My father has always told me to never rely on just one thing, always make sure you have multiple options. He would always tell me this for applying to jobs, but it can really help in multiple aspects of life.

eller-2 · August 2017

How far along are you? 6w6d

Any appointments coming up? Tomorrow morning! Ahh.

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) I'm struggling today. I'm tired and so emotional (which could be pregnancy symptoms, but also could just be because first appointments are terrifying and anxiety is exhausting). I know logically that I will be okay whatever tomorrow brings, but I'm struggling to believe that today. I'm also feeling unproductive in all areas of life, which is not boosting my mood (and if anything adds to my anxiety, because I work a job where I have to bill my time, so there's no faking it!).

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given? If you're not happy with something, make a change. Along the lines of no risk, no reward.

@becausescience, @GG620, @justkeeptrying, @SoraLk, hope the loss milestones are not too painful... and that passing them causes PGAL brain to settle down a bit.

@GG620, I've also been having what could be (maybe?) RLP, and it's freaking me out too. I was getting frequent on-and-off twinges on the right side of my pelvic area for about 24 hours (when I was sitting still, which doesn't sound like typical RLP). After googling it too much, I think/hope I'm just feeling RLP or normal uterus stretching... who knows.

@justkeeptrying, I'm sorry you're feeling so sick and that it's not even an encouraging symptom for you. I would assume no news is good news re the blood tests.

@heatherdubrow, I'm so sorry you had such a scare yesterday. I can't imagine. But also so glad there's a good explanation and you were able to get in quickly to get checked out/get some peace of mind. I'm also wondering when I'll feel secure in this pregnancy... I'm afraid I have quite a long way to go.

@hullabalou, I'm happy that you're at 10w and had a great appointment yesterday. I hear you on the extreme back-and-forth emotions!

@pghctwife, good luck today!

and @becausescience, I'm right there with you trying not to read into my lack of symptoms! It's tough.

mdfarmchick · August 2017

How far along are you?
I think around 9 or 10 weeks

Any appointments coming up?
Dating ultrasound today

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
I don't feel anywhere near as bloated for the past two days so I'm trying not to Google.

I had four days of the worst nausea over the weekend and traveling back so that was fun. I'm trying not to freak out that I've felt better the past couple of days. That was my first sign of my MC in June. But my boobs still hurt and this pregnancy headache will not go away. So good signs right??

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given?
since I have become a parent, I have been reminded you can't fill from an empty cup. Like @heatherdubrow said you have to take care of yourself first so you can keep the little humans alive.

@becausescience I know that today is hard--I was pretty much numb for the week where I would have been around my MC from the previous pregnancy. Sending hugs your way.

and my mantra when my symptoms change is this: Every pregnancy is different. Loss of symptoms does not equal loss.

@pghctwife GL with the ultrasound today! Sending you good vibes for some peace of mind.

@hullabalou I'm so glad you had a good ultrasound yesterday and that I'm not alone in going from one set of extreme emotions to the other.

@heatherdubrow it might not be until we are holding these rainbows. But I am so relieved that everything was okay yesterday. Keep taking it easy.

@justkeeptrying Could you call your OB's office and ask for your numbers for some peace of mind??

@GG620 I have had what I think is RLP this pregnancy too and I keep freaking myself out because the way that everyone describes it to me doesn't match exactly how I feel. Lol. Hopefully next Wednesday helps ease your mind a little.

@SoraLk he exhaustion is real over here too. Hoping that you are able to get past your loss milestone without too much anxiety.

SoraLk · August 2017

@eller-2 @mdfarmchick Thank you both, I'll do my best.

@GG620 @becausescience @justkeeptrying Thinking of you all as well. Hopefully passing our milestones makes things even a little easier on our PGAL minds.

@heatherdubrow It's calming to know everything looks to be okay. Please take care of yourself regardless.

mintea · August 2017

How far along are you? 6w3d

Any appointments coming up? In 2 weeks

How are you doing? I just don't feel very pregnant and that's freaking me out. Also, I am feeling sad because I didn't keep any good notes of my previous pregnancies - when I felt sick, when I stopped fitting in my pants, I can't even remember the date of my previous MC or exactly how far along I was. I need to start writing stuff down - I always think I'll remember every detail and I don't.

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given? Go to yoga

hullabalou · August 2017

@mdfarmchick good luck at your dating US today!!

mintea · August 2017

OK correction, I went back in my google calendar. What do you count as the date of a m/c or how far along you were when you m/c? For me I had an empty gestational sac at 9 weeks u/s, a repeat ultrasound at 10 weeks still empty, and then naturally things evacuated at 11 weeks. So what milestone do you normally mark?

hdaley · August 2017

I remember the date of my first ultrasound when the world came crashing down and the date I actually miscarried.

hdaley · August 2017

Doctors will say I miscarried at 5 weeks, but I was 10 weeks with a 5 week baby. I hated that in the ER with them saying you are so early at 5 weeks. I wanted to scream "but I am 10 weeks!!!!"

justkeeptrying · August 2017

@mintea, my story was complicated. I went in for my 12 week appointment and found out baby was only measuring 6w5d. So that date was a huge milestone for me. I opted to miscarry naturally, but after 5 weeks nothing was happening so I took meds to induce labour essentially. I miscarried at 17 weeks. So that date is also significant.

With my second loss, I woke up to cramping and bleeding. I miscarried in the hospital while waiting for an ultrasound. I was 15 weeks.

I think the date doesnt matter so much as whatever was significant to YOU. For my first loss, both dates were equally significant but for different reasons.

GG620 · August 2017

Having a tough day today ladies. So many loss posts and my heart is breaking for them. I have been crampy today and I try to tell myself it's normal, but then wonder if I'm just kidding myself.

*TW DD ahead - having had 2 losses and never any children I sometimes feel so hopeless. I am terrified of every little feeling and find myself having ugly thoughts that maybe I'll just never be a mother. I am so, so thankful to be pregnant (especially after our diagnosis and treatment etc.) But i am just hoping I'm not being set up for failure again. I don't know what I would do/how I would handle another loss. I still want to cry when i see a baby because I don't know if that will ever be me. I want to have a Christmas not just DH and I. I want to be a mother so bad it hurts*

Sorry for the DD. Just a hard day

mdfarmchick · August 2017

@GG620 It's okay to have a hard day. I'm praying that this is your rainbow, take home baby. I think a little cramping is normal. I've had it a few times this pregnancy and my bean was jumping around this morning. Cramping just means baby is growing and your uterus is growing and everything is okay.

You only need to worry if you are bleeding.

eller-2 · August 2017

I'm sorry you're having a tough day, @GG620. I was having similar ugly thoughts this morning, thinking about how devastating it would be to get bad news at my first appointment. I'm attached to this baby and afraid of this pregnancy not ending well, but I'm also afraid that I'll never be a mom to living children. They're kind of linked fears for me. I think it's so hard to make yourself vulnerable again after a loss, but maybe especially when you've never experienced an easy pregnancy or one that ended happily.

One thing that's helped for me is trying to recognize where my black-and-white thinking isn't realistic. That's often reminding myself that: yes, it's possible that my body can't produce healthy babies, but that doesn't mean I'll never be a mother. And then I also try to counter the first part and remind myself that I'm pregnant today and things may go just perfectly in this pregnancy.

The whole journey sure is hard, though, and the longing for a baby is real. Sending you hugs.

chasingroygbiv · August 2017

How far along are you?
Apparently 11+3, I figured at least 11 because of ovulation dates, but they completely changed my due date today from 2/27 to 2/19.

Any appointments coming up?
Just saw Genetics and MFM today, supposed to see generals OB Monday, but I'm going to call and see if they still want to do that. If they do that's totally ok, but I don't want to get there and them look at me like a dork for keeping both appts since they were so close together. I do usually do shared care, but have never had the two different docs so close together.

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
I'm good, but it's always, always in the back of my head. Mat21 blood work was also done today so I'm nervous about that and will probably only get worse as days pass. My cousin thought her baby was healthy and at 23+ weeks found out otherwise and delivered shortly after. The thought of that absolutely shakes me to the core and my heart still breaks for her. On a happy note though baby was a happy little baby today on u/s, kicking away, putting its little hand by its mouth. I'm sure I was smiling ear to ear the entire time. Looked like a real life baby!

DH has been looking at baby names since, but I told him to take it easy still. He likes to move forward and think 100% positive. I love that about him, but it doesn't make my fears go away. He also was one that thought all of my last 3 pregnancies would be "just fine" when my gut knew otherwise.

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given?
Just to repeat to myself "today, I am pregnant" and to remember that worrying takes the joy out of today and won't stop anything from happening if it's going to. All true.

chasingroygbiv · August 2017

So many hugs to those struggling today.

August is a crummy crummy month filled with loss milestones for me. It's a different kind of pain. Love your way @becausescience

and also to @GG620

Good luck at your appt tomorrow @eller-2 and anyone else with upcoming appointments.

mdfarmchick · August 2017

So guys I'm trying not to freak out... we had a great heartbeat and a wiggly little alien but baby measured 5 days off from where I think I am. I went back and looked at my calendar and I took a 50 or 100 miu HCG test with afternoon urine 3 days before my possible missed period so I'm just finding it highly unlikely that I could be 5 days off. Am I obsessing for no reason? I know with DS I was pretty sure my EDD would be 30 August and the first ultrasound at 6 weeks measured me 4 September. But then I didn't have another ultrasound with measurements until the anatomy scan, where they adjusted to 31 August EDD.

sorry if this post is inappropriate. I will delete if it is.

chasingroygbiv · August 2017

@mdfarmchick Not inappropriate. Honestly I know they say early ultrasounds are most accurate, but the tech today said the slightest mis-measurement or baby isn't in the best position for measuring it can make for inaccurate dates. Hang tight. Call your doctor and ask for a follow up to make you feel better if you don't have one scheduled. Hugs.

mdfarmchick · August 2017

@chasingroygbiv my follow up won't be until 31 August and I doubt they'll do an ultrasound just because I don't agree with their dates. My insurance is kind of a PITA about those being medically unnecessary. I didn't temp and I didn't have a LMP due to the MC. I'm just more looking for reassurance that 5 days isn't a big deal and maybe that it's not super accurate this early?? Is this something to push about?

mommytron · August 2017

How far along are you?
10 weeks today, due 3/1!

Any appointments coming up?
My next appointment is in 3 weeks. We will hopefully get to hear a heartbeat on the doppler. I am getting anxious just thinking about it. *TW* My 13 week appointment in january is when I found out I had a missed miscarriage at week 9. **End TW**

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
Today I am doing well! I have been seeing my therapist every few weeks rather than monthly for anxiety and it really has been helping.

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given
Live in the present moment.

chasingroygbiv · August 2017

@mdfarmchick If it's enough to cause you excessive worry, yes, push. If a doctor works with PGAL women they tend to understand, that said I've been told several times unless the date is a 7+ day difference there is generally no concern. Does that make sense?

mdfarmchick · August 2017

@chasingroygbiv yes. And I actually feel better. I think I'll keep my original date and talk to him about it my next appointment unless something else happens.

I think maybe the little cherry/strawberry is just a little smaller like it's brother. Overall I don't have a bad feeling yet.

pettycrocker · August 2017

How far along are you? 8+1

Any appointments coming up? Nothing until 10wks

How are you doing? I'm doing ok but PGAL brain is creeping in since my appts are finally slowing down. I keep questioning if baby is ok in there. I want to ask the OB for the Panorama test at my next appt

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given? Cash rules everything around me, C.R.E.A.M, get the money, dollar dollar bills y'all. -Wu Tang Clan

ishmoney · August 2017

Sorry I'm late to the party. Today was work and then I was extremely tired.

How far along are you?
6w5d (updated by doc yesterday)

Any appointments coming up?
Just had the one yesterday. Next one will be first with midwife on 8/26 (at 10 weeks).

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
The fatigue and nausea are kicking my butt. I had to cancel class tonight because I did not think I would survive. I haven't cancelled a class for illness in the 6 years I've been at that college.

I feel a lil defeated by the f and n and overwhelmed by the things I have not been able to accomplish. I'm thankful for being pregnant, every day.

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given?
Ask for help. Allow people to help you.

XO to everyone! I'm praying tonight for all of your concerns.

savykay · August 2017

Hi ladies! This is my first week participating in this.

How far along are you?
7w2d according to my LMP

Any appointments coming up?
Not until the 16th, when I'll be 9 weeks, which I think is ridiculous considering I have a history of loss. Just let me see my baby!

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
Symptoms wise I have fatigue and nausea, which means my kids are watching entirely too much tv

Loss wise, I just passed the date of my MC (6w5d) so that's good, but we lost our first child, a little boy, when I was 22w2d, which means I spend basically the entire pregnancy terrified because I don't feel like there's any point where I'm "out of the woods"

GTKY: What is the best advice you've been given?
Make the most of the little moments.

justkeeptrying · August 2017

@mdfarmchick, I got my positive with DS 4 days before my period was due. He measured 4 days behind at my first ultrasound (around 8 weeks). I was super worried. My OB said there is nothing to be concerned about if they're measuring less than a week off. By his 20 week anatomy scan he was measuring 10 days ahead.

Some people just have HCG doubling faster than others, and therefore a positive test sooner. The HCG in my system with him was already at 395 before my missed period. Some people don't even have it at 10 by the time their period is due.

I know it's hard not to worry, but try not to. Important part is seeing that strong heartbeat. Focus on that.

mdfarmchick · August 2017

Thank you so much @fullofhope25. And I loved seeing your ultrasound picture!

ishmoney · August 2017

Since no one answered in weekly questions, is anyone using ACV for heartburn? I'm having difficulty eating anything with nausea and disinterest in food.

mdfarmchick · August 2017

@ishmoney I have not. My previous BMB moved to Facebook and has a bunch of pregnant ladies on it and we just discussed. The overall consensus seemed to me that it didn't really help? I took Zantac when I was pregnant with DS during the second half of my pregnancy. Hope this helps.

eller-2 · August 2017

Just left my appointment. It was good, I think, but I'm not feeling terribly reassured. (Is that just PGAL brain?) Baby is measuring 6w5d with a heartrate of 120. I was expecting 7w based on when I ovulated... glad we just had the conversation about dates being somewhat off! I was also hoping for a higher heartrate for peace of mind, but I think the news is good.

They're bringing me back in a week because I would be 8w5d today based on my LMP. Hopefully the two ultrasounds together will help me relax!

ishmoney · August 2017

FX and prayers for the next u/s @eller-2! One victory at a time. The peanut was in there with a beating heart! Give them time to catch up (if that's what's needed).

Thank you @mdfarmchick. I'm just so despondent...I need a first trimester food/life coach. Feel like I just want to close my eyes and wake up in 6 weeks and hope for a change.

PGAL Check-In - 8/3

Re: PGAL Check-In - 8/3

Choose Another Board

Search Boards