@natleilynn oh I didn't take it as negative! I was just pointing out that I didn't mean to sound so deep.
And I agree with you! We let our girls wear what they want and play with what they want. The other day DD1 wore superman jammies and sparkly shoes to the grocery store.
i say sex over gender bc i want to not offend. but for gender reveal i tend to say gender bc sex reveal sounds weird. like i am going to reveal a sex tape or something haha. THIS IS WHY I DONT DO SEX REVEALS OK!?
Meh, I think when you know better you should do better. If you know that using the term gender could be hurtful to a group of people who are struggling with their identity, then it's kind of an asshole move to continue using it because it "doesn't matter to you and they mean the same thing".
But I'm pretty much in that boat when ti comes to almost every topic. Just because YOU aren't personally affected by something or it's not important to YOU, doesn't make it not important.
Words definitely matter. So many people have their own personal lists of words that "you can't say that around me!," but then in turn get mad when someone else asks those people for the same level of respect in refraining from using some words.
It is all about effort, not perfection in execution.
*Siggy warning - loss mentioned* Preemie ID DDs; then DS; then natural M/C; now due 10/17 High risk for pre-term: weekly Makena injections
I think when it's about a baby everyone knows people are referring to the assumed gender so I don't get all hot and bothered about it. Like, I know our Sloan's sex is female so I assume her gender is as well because that's the default. Obviously if I observe signs that she's leaning more male then we'll have a conversation about it to make sure she has the vocabulary she needs to let us know what she's feeling. But I need to assume her gender now in order to even refer to her as "her" since our language doesn't have a non-gendered pronoun that is immediately recognizable to most people. I'm exhausted today so this might not make sense but I'm trying to say I don't see the harm in saying gender because obviously it's just an assumption but it's one we kind of need to make just to talk about the babies.
It is all about effort, not perfection in execution.
Yes, I agree. I slip up and use words in ways I don't like. The difference between what irritates me and an honest mistake is the whole "it doesn't matter" attitude if you are called on it.
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I heart theSkimm I heart YNAB --------- “Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light." - Albus Dumbledore
I see everyone's points about sex versus gender. Especially when it comes to referring to a baby.
I think the turning point for me (in not using gender for both) was getting to know people whose gender and sex didn't match. For the vast majority of people, they match and that's great. It doesn't really matter whether you say gender or sex. But on the off chance you are talking to someone who was transgender, it would really matter to them. So I use sex when talking about whether LO is a boy or girl. It is likely that his gender will match his sex, but if it doesn't, that's okay too.
i say sex over gender bc i want to not offend. but for gender reveal i tend to say gender bc sex reveal sounds weird. like i am going to reveal a sex tape or something haha. THIS IS WHY I DONT DO SEX REVEALS OK!?
Let me tell you the shit I would have had to deal with from my ILs and DH's old school grandparents if I had sent out invites saying "join us for a sex reveal!". Yeah, no thanks.
My UO. I feel like everyone in the world in general is getting overly sensitive on usage of words and phrases and everything is becoming politically incorrect. Words are often hard for me and I'm not eloquent. (Maths & Science brain here).
I'm glad my autocorrect fail brought some chuckles I'm pretty sure my phone just outed me for my dildo talk via text.
Me: 31 DH:35 TTC #1: March 2011 Fur-children: 3 dogs + 2 cats (all rescued) dx: Endometriosis and Fibroids 2 Laps and 1 Abdominal Myomectomy 6 rounds of clomid 5 rounds of iui IVF #1 Gonal F, Menopur and Cetrotide ER 12/1/2016:Retrieved 22 eggs 12 fertilized, developed moderate OHSS 4/4 day 5 embryos were normal for PGS!!! 2 boys/2 girls FET 1/10/2017 Gallbladder surgery 1/10/2017 FET 2/2 BFP 2/7/17 Beta#1: 594!!! Beta#2 1630!!! Having a girl! EDD 10/21/17
I think exotic sports cars are ugly. And I love a nice sports car. But I'll stick with the middle of the deck, average-Joe luxury sports cars over the Ferrari or Maserati. I can't get over how ugly the "elite rich" realm of cars are. DH on the other hand would be all over them if we were magically super rich and I would probably cringe
If you're in the grocery line and you don't put the grocery divider after your goods, you're a freaking jerk and i'll help myself to staring at your total.
Oreo cookies are getting out of hand. They have 2415374 different flavors now. I just saw an ad for "firework" ones that are made with popping candy. Original and double stuffed are the only acceptable oreos.
June 2017 Siggy Challenge: "You had one job to do!"
My UO: I flippin cannot stand the cliché phrase "I love you to the moon and back." I hate it...When I see it written as a caption or something I feel bile raising in my throat.
Related- my bestie and my sister are planning our baby shower and we're going with a "good night moon" theme. I think it's adorable and DH and I have long talked about a celestial/outer space subtle themed nursery.
I am so worried that someone will buy me a sign or onesie with "I love you to the moon and back" on it!!! Ugh.
I really despise anything with wording on it. Whether or not it's clothes, wall art, decor, etc. Anything that says, "Live, Love, Laugh" etc. makes me want to vomit. It's so cheesy.
Oreo cookies are getting out of hand. They have 2415374 different flavors now. I just saw an ad for "firework" ones that are made with popping candy. Original and double stuffed are the only acceptable oreos.
Correction: double stuffed are the only acceptable Oreos
I rarely use OMG, GD, etc. mostly because I'm not very religious and it doesn't have much meaning to me. DH grew up slightly more religious than me and went to Catholic school and takes the Lord's name in vain all the time. It bothers me mostly because it is a reminder of our religious differences.
We do both have potty mouths and probably won't change that around baby, but will teach her as she gets older about inappropriate times to use those words. In general. I try not to use words or phrases that offend people. However, I have a lot of friends of different backgrounds so I tend to repeat things they say like "FOBY" or "they're on Indian time" and I realize it could come off as racist or at least stereotyping.
Calling people "sweetie" or "honey" really bothers me unless you are talking to your SO. My dad does it to waitresses all the time and I find it so offensive. I expect he will do it to my kid, too, but I'm gonna shut that down as fast as I can.
I prefer honeydew to cantaloupe but I'm okay with both. In fruit salad it usually tends to be under ripe and therefore less delicious.
I forgot to address the "bestest husband ever" opinion... I don't say that sh*t cause I expect greatness from my husband. Doing the expected (e.g. flowers on Valentine's Day) doesn't make you the best. It makes you average.
I also hate when AWs communicate with their SO on social media when it should be a private convo. None of that "Thanks for the flowers!!!!! You are the best husband ever" crap, please.
SIL and MIL went through a phase where they were obsessed with "I love you to the moon and back", so there is a ton of stuff SIL had her son make for MIL sitting around their house. Oh hate I loathe it.
Double stuff all the way. And the only way.
It makes me wonder how miserable someone's marriage must be if they feel the need to "brag" about their spouse on social media. My husband and I hardly ever comment on each other's posts or post about each other. We'll tag in photos we post or funny things we see, but we tell each other in person we appreciate them. Not blast it in social media
Well private declarations are totally different. It's the public FB flaunting "perfect life" which in turn screams "ehhhh so that relationship is on the rocks..."
DH has asked me why I don't post mushy public declarations of love on his Facebook. I think he just sees other people do it and thinks it's normal behavior. He honestly wishes that I would but I just can't bring myself to do it! Barf.
also agree that Oreo is out of control....but I do enjoy the lemon ones with the vanilla cookie.
I'm totally guilty of the omg thing, I'm also pretty sure I did it on a thread yesterday, sorry for that! I agree with a pp that I don't feel it's on the same level as some of the other words spoken about in this thread, but I also agree it's still best avoided if possible.
On that note, I effing hate rape jokes. I always speak up when I hear them, even though it's always super awkward. Things like "that test raped me." Words are powerful things, and a word as ugly as rape should never be desensitized by being used in that kind of joking way. The more we hear a word, the more normal it seems, and sexual assault should never be normal. I also dislike the "everyone is becoming too sensitive and pc" argument.
On a lighter note: I also love cantoulope while hating honeydew, my husband is the best in the world, I love the dildo jokes, hate most cheesy sayings and love my mundane Hyundai way more than any fancy sports car.
If you're in the grocery line and you don't put the grocery divider after your goods, you're a freaking jerk and i'll help myself to staring at your total.
I'd never really heard "love you to the moon and back" until someone gave us the book about the nutbrown hares. Is that where it comes from? I find that book kind of tedious to read.
Cookie part of Oreo is way better than stuffing. I'm cool with the chocolate stuffed ones too.
Re: UO
And I agree with you! We let our girls wear what they want and play with what they want. The other day DD1 wore superman jammies and sparkly shoes to the grocery store.
May Siggy Challenge: Parenting Fails
It is all about effort, not perfection in execution.
Preemie ID DDs; then DS; then natural M/C; now due 10/17
High risk for pre-term: weekly Makena injections
also i feel like i am going to say "this" so much more lololzzz sorry @MamaStreeter it makes me giggle now.
May Siggy Challenge: Parenting Fails
I heart YNAB
---------
“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times,
if one only remembers to turn on the light."
- Albus Dumbledore
I think the turning point for me (in not using gender for both) was getting to know people whose gender and sex didn't match. For the vast majority of people, they match and that's great. It doesn't really matter whether you say gender or sex. But on the off chance you are talking to someone who was transgender, it would really matter to them. So I use sex when talking about whether LO is a boy or girl. It is likely that his gender will match his sex, but if it doesn't, that's okay too.
**June Siggy Challenge: You Had ONE Job!**
LO#2 EDD October 18th
TTC #1: March 2011
Fur-children: 3 dogs + 2 cats (all rescued)
dx: Endometriosis and Fibroids
2 Laps and 1 Abdominal Myomectomy
6 rounds of clomid
5 rounds of iui
IVF #1 Gonal F, Menopur and Cetrotide
ER 12/1/2016:Retrieved 22 eggs 12 fertilized, developed moderate OHSS
4/4 day 5 embryos were normal for PGS!!! 2 boys/2 girls
FET 1/10/2017
Gallbladder surgery 1/10/2017
FET 2/2
BFP 2/7/17
Having a girl! EDD 10/21/17
Related- my bestie and my sister are planning our baby shower and we're going with a "good night moon" theme. I think it's adorable and DH and I have long talked about a celestial/outer space subtle themed nursery.
I am so worried that someone will buy me a sign or onesie with "I love you to the moon and back" on it!!! Ugh.
I really despise anything with wording on it. Whether or not it's clothes, wall art, decor, etc. Anything that says, "Live, Love, Laugh" etc. makes me want to vomit. It's so cheesy.
@dumbledoredies YES live laugh love is the anus of all home decor.
My UO? I don't like double stuffed oreos. The cookie part is way better then the filling IMO.
We do both have potty mouths and probably won't change that around baby, but will teach her as she gets older about inappropriate times to use those words. In general. I try not to use words or phrases that offend people. However, I have a lot of friends of different backgrounds so I tend to repeat things they say like "FOBY" or "they're on Indian time" and I realize it could come off as racist or at least stereotyping.
Calling people "sweetie" or "honey" really bothers me unless you are talking to your SO. My dad does it to waitresses all the time and I find it so offensive. I expect he will do it to my kid, too, but I'm gonna shut that down as fast as I can.
I prefer honeydew to cantaloupe but I'm okay with both. In fruit salad it usually tends to be under ripe and therefore less delicious.
@ChocolateIsLife pretty much made my day with that typo.
I also hate when AWs communicate with their SO on social media when it should be a private convo. None of that "Thanks for the flowers!!!!! You are the best husband ever" crap, please.
May Siggy Challenge: Parenting Fails
May Siggy Challenge: Parenting Fails
I dont hate it.
*O17 June Siggy Challenge - You had 1 job!*
Double stuff all the way. And the only way.
It makes me wonder how miserable someone's marriage must be if they feel the need to "brag" about their spouse on social media. My husband and I hardly ever comment on each other's posts or post about each other. We'll tag in photos we post or funny things we see, but we tell each other in person we appreciate them. Not blast it in social media
May Siggy Challenge: Parenting Fails
May Siggy Challenge: Parenting Fails
also agree that Oreo is out of control....but I do enjoy the lemon ones with the vanilla cookie.
*O17 June Siggy Challenge - You had 1 job!*
I'm totally guilty of the omg thing, I'm also pretty sure I did it on a thread yesterday, sorry for that! I agree with a pp that I don't feel it's on the same level as some of the other words spoken about in this thread, but I also agree it's still best avoided if possible.
On that note, I effing hate rape jokes. I always speak up when I hear them, even though it's always super awkward. Things like "that test raped me." Words are powerful things, and a word as ugly as rape should never be desensitized by being used in that kind of joking way. The more we hear a word, the more normal it seems, and sexual assault should never be normal. I also dislike the "everyone is becoming too sensitive and pc" argument.
On a lighter note: I also love cantoulope while hating honeydew, my husband is the best in the world, I love the dildo jokes, hate most cheesy sayings and love my mundane Hyundai way more than any fancy sports car.
Oh and
This.
May Siggy Challenge: Parenting Fails
*O17 June Siggy Challenge - You had 1 job!*
May Siggy Challenge: Parenting Fails
Cookie part of Oreo is way better than stuffing. I'm cool with the chocolate stuffed ones too.
I'm cool with the listeria part, but slimy lunch meat just isn't my jam.
*O17 June Siggy Challenge - You had 1 job!*