Oh mom, why oh why are you so...you? I believe my mother is going through a mid life crisis, this is the only thing that can explain how she's been behaving. My brother told me that our dad said "She's a hot mess". So there is that.
So things had started to get better in the mother/daughter relationship land...well more like i'm just biting my tongue. Thennn Sunday happened. We had a fine conversation, but she basically shoved me off the phone because...because I still am not sure why. 3 minutes later she calls back in a panic that she just got this text from my brother and she has to read it verbatim to me so she's getting her glasses (side note, my SIL has a history of severe depression and has attempted suicide multiple times and my brother has had to get her admitted many times, so I thought it had to be something SUPER serious like this), once she she finally gets her glasses she reads it to me...my brother and SIL are deciding to get a divorce...for the 3rd time now in like 2 years. Now, I dont think my mom realizes that my brother and I talk on a regular (my brother isnt a very social guy) and that I already knew things were getting to this point again. So I responded calmly...."oh, okay, that sucks..." and before i could get to "If that is what he wants and will make him happy I support him 100%." she FLIPS THE HELL OUT that I don't care about our family and that I am so insensitive and selfish and she starts bawling her eyes out saying really mean things to me, so I hung up.
I have talked to my brother to make sure he doesn't get the wrong message of my reaction from mom, and have offered that when we move back to VA he can move in with us. My mom is losing it. I think the whole concept that her youngest (me) is having a kid is freaking her out, or the fact that she is turning 55 this year is freaking her out, IDK she's lost some marbles lately and everyone has noticed but her.
@labby18 this is my mom every day of her life so I can relate. Also why we do not talk. I'm sorry you have to deal with it. It's so stressful and unnecessary. At least we know how NOT to act as mothers!
@labby18 could she possibly be pre menopausal or menopausal? Every mom around this age right now is acting so strangely and my mother in law is going through menopause (I like to think this is why she has been so selfish but who am I kidding she's always been selfish) but with the intense mood swings and borderline bipolar reactions it could be hormonal? Maybe?
Mom problems are not fun I can totally relate. My bestie(who is a new real estate agent) was showing my mom houses for a couple saturdays, and then my mom goes and buys a house under another agent. They haven't spoken since obviously, but now there is a school function and our kids go to the same school and I want my mom to help and volunteer.... it sucks
it probably is menopause, but it's scary crazy. the other day she asked how i was doing and then answered how she was doing without letting me even open my mouth to respond. I was just like "oh ok then..." she used to be cool, and i could talk to her about anything, and now...now she's just bat shit crazy, and God forbid I need to talk to her about something other than herself. ugggh. maybe when we move back to Virginia it would be as bad because there won't be the distance causing strain? idk, hopeful thinking.
eta: @bridge-and-wall she used to not be so difficult...it's so random. Literally since I told her I'm pregnant she's gone coo-coo
I found my mojo guys. It came (heh... lol) in the form of DH. He is not the stereotypical male who can't find the clitoris. He knows where it is and he knows how to sweet talk her. So lately, he lets me finish before we even start... which reeeaally helps.
@labby18 yeah my first thought was menopause, too. Hopefully that means it will eventually get better, at least. I'm sorry you're having to deal with that, though.
My TW is a soon-to-be former co-worker who has been majorly bad-mouthing our workplace upon announcing she's leaving. I'm not trying to be the company mascot or anything but she's being anything but graceful in her exit.
@labby18 hey, I hear ya. I don't know how close you live to your mom but at some point (maybe after baby is here) you might want to consider doing therapy together. It could really make a world of a difference. I hate how stigmatized it is and think there are so many positives that can come of it. Just a thought, sounds like it could clear up a lot of pent up emotions. Hang in there!
@labby18 I'm sorry about your mom. She definitely sounds pretty unstable. Hopefully things get better when you move closer. It's a good thing you talked to your brother so that there wasn't any miscommunications about what your intentions were.
My TW is the chick who didn't order my lunch for the company picnic today. She was all oh hey sorry I forgot your lunch. I set your allergy notice off to the side and must have forgot. NBD, right? You can have a cookie or jellybeans.
Forgetting to feed the only pregnant lady at the office at a company event where we are expected to participate in their 5 mile hike / scavenger hunt is a big deal. And no I can't have the cookie or jellybeans because I have insulin issues and don't feel like having to call EMS due to a blood sugar problem.
I'm just grateful we got to leave a little early so I could go pick up some fast food. I was starving!
@JNR6510 That makes me so mad for you! They should have traded food with someone else who wasn't pregnant. Or something. Did you leave and get your own food?? Insanity. Sounds awful.
Me: 27 years old DH: 27 years old Type 1 Diabetes since 2001, MTHFR hetero A1298T Dogs: Raider 4 yrs, Dex 4 yrs
Married in July 2014
TTC #1 since late Feb 2016
BFP #1 3/29/16 MMC: 5/5/16 BFP #2 7/6/16 SCH, D&C 8/4/16 BFP #3 12/26/16 EDD: 9/6/17 My Chart / My Diabetes/Pregnancy Blog My Type 1/TTC/Pregnancy Podcast: Juicebox Podcast Episode 118 A1Cs: 1/12/16 6.7% 5/25/16 6.0% 11/2/16 6.1% 3/22/16 5.8% 4/27/17 5.4% 6/13/17 5.3% "Sugar Fancy Tutu"
@wyomama0427 that's the one! Ha. I can't even get to where I want DH to try.
Edit cause it posted too soon
I find I need to act like we're dating again. When I used to spend hours getting ready for a romp sesh. I don't quite go that far but a nice warm shower and a shave, smooth arms and legs and such, some smelly good lotion, and I can feel frisky. If I feel bad about myself tho, it's pretty much a no go
I've told DH that I'm having some body image issues and that I need him to give me positive affirmations about how I'm looking (which sounds SO LAME when I type it out, but I wanted to be direct with him about how I'm feeling). But I think this has made him a little overly cautious, because he probably translated that as "I don't want you to touch me" when in fact I meant it as "I don't feel sexy so I'd like you to make me feel sexy". So, long story short, no action whatsoever as of late.
@coastalmomma yes, students are allowed to be called TWs
TTGP history (*TW*):
Started TTC Oct 2015 BFP #1 June 2016: EDD 16 March 2017, MC July 2016 Re-started TTC Aug 2016 Started IF testing Nov 2016 Spontaneous BFP #2 January 2017: Rainbow Baby Boy September 2017 BFP #3 November 2018: Baby #2 expected August 2019
I know it's Thursday, but the lady in front of me in the 12 items of fewer line is a TW. She has 20 items. I have 7, this has been a long day, and I would like to go home.
Re: TW Tuesday! 5/23
So things had started to get better in the mother/daughter relationship land...well more like i'm just biting my tongue. Thennn Sunday happened. We had a fine conversation, but she basically shoved me off the phone because...because I still am not sure why. 3 minutes later she calls back in a panic that she just got this text from my brother and she has to read it verbatim to me so she's getting her glasses (side note, my SIL has a history of severe depression and has attempted suicide multiple times and my brother has had to get her admitted many times, so I thought it had to be something SUPER serious like this), once she she finally gets her glasses she reads it to me...my brother and SIL are deciding to get a divorce...for the 3rd time now in like 2 years. Now, I dont think my mom realizes that my brother and I talk on a regular (my brother isnt a very social guy) and that I already knew things were getting to this point again. So I responded calmly...."oh, okay, that sucks..." and before i could get to "If that is what he wants and will make him happy I support him 100%." she FLIPS THE HELL OUT that I don't care about our family and that I am so insensitive and selfish and she starts bawling her eyes out saying really mean things to me, so I hung up.
I have talked to my brother to make sure he doesn't get the wrong message of my reaction from mom, and have offered that when we move back to VA he can move in with us. My mom is losing it. I think the whole concept that her youngest (me) is having a kid is freaking her out, or the fact that she is turning 55 this year is freaking her out, IDK she's lost some marbles lately and everyone has noticed but her.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Me 34 DH 34
PCOS
Baby number 2 due 4/11/20
it probably is menopause, but it's scary crazy. the other day she asked how i was doing and then answered how she was doing without letting me even open my mouth to respond. I was just like "oh ok then..." she used to be cool, and i could talk to her about anything, and now...now she's just bat shit crazy, and God forbid I need to talk to her about something other than herself. ugggh. maybe when we move back to Virginia it would be as bad because there won't be the distance causing strain? idk, hopeful thinking.
eta: @bridge-and-wall
she used to not be so difficult...it's so random. Literally since I told her I'm pregnant she's gone coo-coo
Me: 35 | DH: 38
Met: 2007
Married: 2013
BFP #1: 06/21/16 MMC: 08/04/16
BFP #2: 01/08/17 DD: 09/23/17
BFP #3: 06/10/20 EDD: 02/11/2021
My TW is a soon-to-be former co-worker who has been majorly bad-mouthing our workplace upon announcing she's leaving. I'm not trying to be the company mascot or anything but she's being anything but graceful in her exit.
Edit cause it posted too soon
Forgetting to feed the only pregnant lady at the office at a company event where we are expected to participate in their 5 mile hike / scavenger hunt is a big deal. And no I can't have the cookie or jellybeans because I have insulin issues and don't feel like having to call EMS due to a blood sugar problem.
I'm just grateful we got to leave a little early so I could go pick up some fast food. I was starving!
Type 1 Diabetes since 2001, MTHFR hetero A1298T
Dogs: Raider 4 yrs, Dex 4 yrs
BFP #2 7/6/16 SCH, D&C 8/4/16
BFP #3 12/26/16 EDD: 9/6/17
My Chart / My Diabetes/Pregnancy Blog
My Type 1/TTC/Pregnancy Podcast:
Juicebox Podcast Episode 118
A1Cs:
1/12/16 6.7%
5/25/16 6.0%
11/2/16 6.1%
3/22/16 5.8%
4/27/17 5.4%
6/13/17 5.3%
"Sugar Fancy Tutu"
Me: 35 | DH: 38
Met: 2007
Married: 2013
BFP #1: 06/21/16 MMC: 08/04/16
BFP #2: 01/08/17 DD: 09/23/17
BFP #3: 06/10/20 EDD: 02/11/2021
BFP #1 June 2016: EDD 16 March 2017, MC July 2016
Re-started TTC Aug 2016
Started IF testing Nov 2016
Spontaneous BFP #2 January 2017: Rainbow Baby Boy September 2017
BFP #3 November 2018: Baby #2 expected August 2019