Labor Buddy

SaphireSweetie88 · April 2017

Since we're getting closer and closer to that time I figured we should start discussing labor buddies (now that we all know what that means on TB lol). That way we know who our labor buddy is.

I have a randomizer that I can use to randomly pair people together (if you don't care who you're paired with). I figure we'd wait until MAY 15th (unless there's a reason to wait longer) to give people a chance to say yes or no to wanting a labor buddy and then go from there.

I added a spreadsheet you can fill out to make random pairing easier. If you have a preference (ex: want to be paired with a c/s if you're having a c/s) please let me know!

Any other ideas?

Edit: added spreadsheet

MrsLa3 · April 2017

I don't like the idea of being randomly paired. My last BMB had a list to go by, if you didn't want to be paired randomly, and you can also pick your labor buddy. Depending on how many people want to join in labor buddies. And we should make a cut off date.

FTM/STM
Number of children
Singleton/twins
RCS /CS/vaginal delivery
How active they are on the board (you don't want a regular paired with a semi lurker)
Grouped in 2 or 3

Things along those lines. For instance I can say I want to be paired with another mamma having an RCS (twins or single doesnt matter) that already has multiple small children at home. That's not my final desicion just giving an example.

Eta tb ate half my post

And I also think the PG should get to pick first, whether they want to choose or paired by list.

SaphireSweetie88 · April 2017

@MrsLa3

I figured we'd have a cut off date. I just don't know what it would be yet. Figured that date would be open for discussion.

I like you're idea. That way there is some more control over who gets paired together. That would be easy enough for me to set up an excel / spreadsheet if that's the way we go.

Did your last group have groups of 3 people paired together? I like that in case 2 people go in right at the same time. I am thinking of how we can best TRY to avoid a situation where 2 people are in labor at the same time (although I know it's not 100% avoidable)

MrsLa3 · April 2017

@SaphireSweetie88 some were only 2 in a group some were 3. I had three in mine and one didn't even participate so me and the other girl were a little sketchy when it came to sharing anything with her.

I also edited my first post again if you missed it. I think those in the PG should get first pick at labor buddies.

SaphireSweetie88 · April 2017

Also, I was thinking maybe a cut off date of mid May. Maybe May 15th? What do you think?

SaphireSweetie88 · April 2017

@MrsLa3 - I like the idea of PG members getting first pick.

I will start an excel and add it to the OP here then edit it as needed.

glitterfish-2 · April 2017

I thought we were just doing this in the PG?

MrsLa3 · April 2017

GlitterFish said:

I thought we were just doing this in the PG?

There might be people not in the PG that want a labor buddy. But shouldn't be paired with those in the PG.

MrsLa3 · April 2017

@SaphireSweetie88 it unavoidable. My last LB went into labor the day as my RCS and she wasn't due for another 2 weeks.

glitterfish-2 · April 2017

MrsLa3 said:

GlitterFish said:

I thought we were just doing this in the PG?

There might be people not in the PG that want a labor buddy. But shouldn't be paired with those in the PG.

Right, I hadn't read your response about picking first in there. I had to double check where I clicked!

longhairdntcare · April 2017

I started a discussion in the PG

SaphireSweetie88 · April 2017

MrsLa3 said:

@SaphireSweetie88 it unavoidable. My last LB went into labor the day as my RCS and she wasn't due for another 2 weeks.

I know it's unavoidable but I'd like to try haha

Dcwtada · April 2017

I agreed, I'd rather not be randomly paired unless you are ok with it. Me and my labor buddy had each other's DHs cell number and we were friends in Facebook so they could update from texts or updates posted via Facebook so that is obviously not something I'd be comfortable sharing randomly. My DH was terrible at updating (he may still have not texted her my DD was born) so she could also see my moms and family's posts.

Obviously you don't have to do that but it took pressure off mom trying to update multiple people - not that it has to be real time but it is so exciting it's hard to wait for hours to hear news while mom recovers and starts bonding!

SaphireSweetie88 · April 2017

I added the spreadsheet.

cssme13 · April 2017

I guess I missed out on the private group.

But another thing to keep in mind is c/s moms who schedule theirs, I know some hospitals don't have their surgery schedules yet so that may determine whether c/s moms are labor buddies because if their surgery is the same or too close it would be a little difficult to update everyone.

DarkSerendipity · April 2017

I would love a labor buddy, and I'm good with being paired with anyone. Sign me up!

SaphireSweetie88 · April 2017

DarkSerendipity said:

I would love a labor buddy, and I'm good with being paired with anyone. Sign me up!

@DarkSerendipity - Sounds good. Once I do the pairings, I will let you know who you're paired with. Fill out the spreadsheet if you haven't already.

BabyBump2 · April 2017

cait32 said:

Sorry, but I think I missed the explanation of the point of a labor buddy. Can someone clarify? Isn't it just as easy to just update TB on mobile if we want to?

And I'm guessing I'm labeled as a "semi lurker" at this point, but I just have to air that all the private group talk feels pretty crappy. There are people in this group, lurker or not, who want to participate as they're able. If the PG wants to set up a labor buddy system, why even do one in the whole group, unless a "semi lurker" wants it, in which case we could set one up here without the PG?

I'm legitimately not trying to be rude. It just feels super weird that the PG gets discussed in the main July group, especially in an "us vs them" way, such as only having labor buddies that are also in the PG. Couldn't the PG just do its own thing if its members aren't interested in partnering with non-PG members?

Preach.

AdaByron · April 2017

Yeah the way all this went down feels icky to me.

BabyBump2 · April 2017

I honestly have no idea why the PG is even part of any discussion in here. Completely rude. Sorry not all of us can be on here all the time and be part of the regulars.

If it was already your plan to have labor buddies in the PG, there's no reason to bring it up here.

longhairdntcare · April 2017

@cait32 yes, a labor buddy is someone you will update during labor/delivery that can then update the group and let them know why you're mia.

I don't think it was it was anyone's intention to be rude or make it seem like "us vs them" and I'm sorry you feel that way. It obviously hadn't been discussed in the PG first, which is why there was some confusion.

longhairdntcare · April 2017

@cait32 for sure. That definitely wasn't anyone's intent.

SaphireSweetie88 · April 2017

I did not intend to upset or offend anyone with this discussion. I am very sorry if I did.

I started it here because I am active in both areas and I personally would not mind if my LB was someone who is a "semi-lurker". I honestly was only trying to get LB set up for all of us who would like one. - regardless of level of participation / activity.

That being said, I'd still love to set up a pairing for LB here if anyone wants to participate and have a LB.

BusyZee · April 2017

SaphireSweetie88 said:

@MrsLa3 - I like the idea of PG members getting first pick.
I will start an excel and add it to the OP here then edit it as needed.

Right.

PurplePoppy424 · April 2017

BusyZee said:

SaphireSweetie88 said:

@MrsLa3 - I like the idea of PG members getting first pick.
I will start an excel and add it to the OP here then edit it as needed.

Right.

You trying to start an argument? This thread died and you're coming back now to start this. I think the point has been made.

MrsLa3 · April 2017

**Removed for TOU violation**

AdaByron · April 2017

**Removed for TOU violation**

I think this is mean and unnecessary, considering that most of the hurtful comments earlier in the thread came from you as well. Maybe it's time to let this die.

MrsLa3 · April 2017

AdaByron said:

**Removed for TOU violation**

I think this is mean and unnecessary, considering that most of the hurtful comments earlier in the thread came from you as well. Maybe it's time to let this die.

I didn't realize I said anything hurtful in this thread, I apologize for any feelings hurt.

I feel like busyzee trying to start something about me saying the ladies in the private should be paired with each other is unnecessary as well.

AdaByron · April 2017

MrsLa3 said:

AdaByron said:

**Removed for TOU violation**

I think this is mean and unnecessary, considering that most of the hurtful comments earlier in the thread came from you as well. Maybe it's time to let this die.

I didn't realize I said anything hurtful in this thread, I apologize for any feelings hurt.

I feel like busyzee trying to start something about me saying the ladies in the private should be paired with each other is unnecessary as well.

I think you saying the PG should be paired with each other is what caused some hurt feelings in this thread. And if someone wants to call you out on that, I'm sure you can take it as well as you dish it. And I actually thought BZ was trying to call out saphiresweetie, not you. I think your last comment crossed a line though. That's all I'm going to say about it.

postywiththemosty · April 2017

@BusyZee FTR, I think trying to call out SaphireSweetie after she apologized was a jerk move as well.

ginger1228 · April 2017

I think everyone needs to move on. At this point I'd say close this thread and start a new one once the PG has made their matches. I think otherwise the focus will just stay on the drama instead of the point of the thread. Just let it die.

BabyBump2 · April 2017

AdaByron said:

MrsLa3 said:

AdaByron said:

**Removed for TOU violation**

I think this is mean and unnecessary, considering that most of the hurtful comments earlier in the thread came from you as well. Maybe it's time to let this die.

I didn't realize I said anything hurtful in this thread, I apologize for any feelings hurt.

I feel like busyzee trying to start something about me saying the ladies in the private should be paired with each other is unnecessary as well.

I think you saying the PG should be paired with each other is what caused some hurt feelings in this thread. And if someone wants to call you out on that, I'm sure you can take it as well as you dish it. And I actually thought BZ was trying to call out saphiresweetie, not you. I think your last comment crossed a line though. That's all I'm going to say about it.

Hilarious

And I will say it's the same people who come to every thread to try and be the last person to leave an unnecessary snarky comment.

This isnt towards you @AdaByron

BumpAdmin · April 2017

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