September 2017 Moms

Bitchfest 4/17

2

Re: Bitchfest 4/17

  • @wyomama0427 I'm so sorry about your DH's aunt, that's awful. I truly hope it's not cancerous. 

    @DaphneMoon1 Holy shit. What on Earth would possess someone to share that kind of information at that moment and with customers?! 

    Me & DH: 31  |  Married: 5.4.13  |  TTC: April 2016  |  BFP: 1.8.17  |  EDD: 9.13.17

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  • Taxes. Headaches. And my DS being sick  :'( Today can go take a flying leap. 
  • edited April 2017
    @DaphneMoon1  people are just so ignorant. And weird. I had a friend in elementary school who had an older brother who died as a baby. She liked to show the photo album from his open casket funeral to her spend the night company.... we were 8! Keep in mind, she had to get the album from her mom, so her parents knew she was showing us. 
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  • @Jamiern01 How far along are you?  I had really bad pubic bone pain around 17w or so, and it lasted about a week.  I took Tylenol (which is on an approved list of pain meds from my midwife), and it helped a lot.  I hope it goes away soon for you!
    I'm 18+1. I might have to break down and take Tylenol. Sitting all day at work has been rather uncomfortable. It actually feels better if I stand. 
  • @DaphneMoon1 People suck!

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Me 34 DH 34 
    PCOS

    DS1 born September 2017
    Baby number 2 due 4/11/20
  • Mine is small compared to some of what you all are going through--hang in there!--but I have had a sore throat, cough with gnarly phlegm coming up, and/or stuffy nose with huge amounts of phlegm coming out when I blow it for the past 17 days. I just want to be able to breathe normally again. 
  • My H has been arguing with me on and off for four hours now about our hot water. We are trying to change out the valve for our clothes washer, which he was supposed to take care of back in August. He has issues with being wrong or rather being held responsible for things that go wrong. It's fun times over here.
  • My bitchfest is fibroids...just when I thought this sucker degenerated and I was on the mend it reared it's ugly painful head again. ER visit today instead of back to work, was there for 5 hours. Positive side is I had sweet relief for a few hours from morphine, and my OB stopped in after visiting with ER doc and I have an appt with MFM Wednesday. 
  • @DaphneMoon1 um. Wtf? That is obviously NOT something you say to a pregnant woman who is excited and celebrating her children!! Especially since SO many pregnant women have issues with wondering "what if?" 
  • @IsItTacoTuesday oh no, I am sorry to hear that you're experiencing that level of pain again. Morphine is amazing. Are you taking colace? Morphine can cause constipation, so you may want to take some in advance. I hope you don't have to go to the er anymore.
  • My BF is all transportation related. My truck in the past two weeks decided to stop reversing (thanks transmission) and now suddenly the ABS is coming on for no reason and grinding. I haven't had the chance to take it in yet but I'm sure I'm looking at several thousand dollars. The longer story includes my bank redoing how they finance things. I used to just be able to take out an unsecured loan if I needed to for vehicle maintenance and now (literally starting April 1st) I'll have to actually put a lien on the truck if I decide to go that route. Not the worst thing ever, but it means I'll have to find the title which is somewhere...Safe. Never put things in safe places, you'll never find them again.
  • My BF is from yesterday, but I am still mad. It goes to my SIL. She is always a bitch. However Easter was even worse than usual. She did not say one word to me about my pregnancy not even a congrats. However we were sitting on the floor cleaning up the kids mess and my mom took a picture. She puts her hand on her hip trying to be cute and I tried to turn away. My brother laughed and she said loud that she doesnt care about pics she knows she isnt the one getting fat.WTF who says that next to a pregnant person. I didn't say anything but I was so mad that I skipped the pie I have been thinking about.
  • @cchenal07 That would pretty much make my blood boil. I would have a very difficult time not saying something to her. Did anyone else say anything to her? What a TW.... That is so sad that her outburst made you skip the dessert. :( 

    My SIL also says some ridiculous things. Once she called my daughter's name "so weird" in front of her and asked me why I named her such a hippy name. :| Yesterday SO had his head in my lap and we were in the living room hanging out while everyone else milled about. Her dad had some bible movie on that ended and the next one was some old gospel movie with singing from Johnny Cash. I didn't change it cause I don't really care what's on the TV and she was like "what in the world are you WATCHING? Do you want the remote??" I politely said "that's okay." And she replied, "you are literally the STRANGEST person I have ever met." 

    I just replied, "wow. Thank you SO much. I will take that as a compliment." 


  • @HollyGolightly09 Thankfully my DD did not care at all. SIL's husband and my SO both said that she was wrong and that DD has a very beautiful name. 

    We just all choose to take everything she says with a grain of salt. 
  • My BF is just this day in general. I somehow slept through my alarm this morning, so I had to stay an extra hour late today. Then I get home to find my neighbors are in my cattle field and are dicking about with my fence on my property. Our fence lies two feet into my property line. The stupid neighbors were trying to use my current fence to hang their new fencing on my land. Not happening!

    So now I have to deal with pissy neighbors. Plus we will have to pay to have our property surveyed again because the assholes dozed my property marker at that corner while they were clearing the trees / brush. Since the neighbors are insisting that they must put up the fence on our property right now, we will have to get the surveyor out here ASAP so I have a legal leg to stand on. If they want to put up a new fence on their property, great. But you aren't going to steal 2000+ square feet of my land just because you don't want to have to pay to have your professional fence company do 4 sides instead of 3.

    All this just adds to my giant financial stress pile. The douchebags we bought the place from literally caused over $10,000 in damages to the property right before they moved out because they got a cash offer from the wealthy farmer who also owns the farm across the street from us and bought the house next door for his daughter. Apparently the farmer wanted to buy our house for his son and made a ridiculous cash offer $7,000 above asking price for the place as is just 6 days before we were set to close. So the previous owners did their best to fuck up the house so we would let them drop the contract for free. So DH and I got backed into a corner with no other options and got screwed with a ton of unexpected repair costs just to make the house live-able. 

    We ate up our savings making a few of the repairs, and now I am just so stressed out. I feel like every time I turn around there is a new hidden major expense, and I hate it.

    TL;DR: Missed my alarm. My neighbors are assholes. And today has me financially stressed and depressed.
  • On the topic of bad sister in laws, I can't stand mine at all. My son's name is Elias, everyone calls him Elias, except for her, she insists on calling him Eli. Except she draws it out in this fake southern accent, and it irritates me to no end. We live in Georgia, and both grew up here, no one I know sounds southern as we live near Atlanta, but she puts on this fake southern accent, and it irritates me so much, but especially when she's decided to give my child a nickname that no one agreed to. I'm 100% sure she calls him Eli just to irritate me.
  • jessieR358jessieR358 member
    edited April 2017
    JNR6510 said:
    My BF is just this day in general. I somehow slept through my alarm this morning, so I had to stay an extra hour late today. Then I get home to find my neighbors are in my cattle field and are dicking about with my fence on my property. Our fence lies two feet into my property line. The stupid neighbors were trying to use my current fence to hang their new fencing on my land. Not happening!

    So now I have to deal with pissy neighbors. Plus we will have to pay to have our property surveyed again because the assholes dozed my property marker at that corner while they were clearing the trees / brush. Since the neighbors are insisting that they must put up the fence on our property right now, we will have to get the surveyor out here ASAP so I have a legal leg to stand on. If they want to put up a new fence on their property, great. But you aren't going to steal 2000+ square feet of my land just because you don't want to have to pay to have your professional fence company do 4 sides instead of 3.

    All this just adds to my giant financial stress pile. The douchebags we bought the place from literally caused over $10,000 in damages to the property right before they moved out because they got a cash offer from the wealthy farmer who also owns the farm across the street from us and bought the house next door for his daughter. Apparently the farmer wanted to buy our house for his son and made a ridiculous cash offer $7,000 above asking price for the place as is just 6 days before we were set to close. So the previous owners did their best to fuck up the house so we would let them drop the contract for free. So DH and I got backed into a corner with no other options and got screwed with a ton of unexpected repair costs just to make the house live-able. 

    We ate up our savings making a few of the repairs, and now I am just so stressed out. I feel like every time I turn around there is a new hidden major expense, and I hate it.

    TL;DR: Missed my alarm. My neighbors are assholes. And today has me financially stressed and depressed.

    I think if your neighbors want a fence then they can pay to to have a surveyor come out. Or I would call the police and say someone is trespassing on to your property if they try that again. For 1.5 acres we paid over $500 for a surveyor to come out. It's not cheap. 

    Edit: I just reread and saw you already paid for a surveyor. Yeah, they bulldozed it over, they can pay for a surveyor. I hate shitty neighbors.
    We have one who is not allowed to step foot on our property because of crazy stuff he has done about our dogs. 
  • @JNR6510 oh jeez. I wish I could tell you something that could help, but I have nothing. Except.. people suck. Not helpful, but seriously. Sometimes certain people just need to be kicked in the face a little. I can almost feel your stress reading your post. I'm sorry you're so stressed and have so much to deal with.  <3
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  • My bitchfest is about money. My maternity leave is completely unpaid, and we keep getting farther and father behind on where we should be with what I budgeted for saving per month.

     It's so BEYOND frustrating, because several of the setbacks are totally unforeseen and not in our power. The latest? DH's car needing a $1500 repair. FIFTEEN HUNDRED DOLLARS. That's cool. I basically just see two weeks of time with my boys, gone. 

    It's like can I catch an effing break? I go back and forth between wanting to scream and wanting to cry under my covers and never come out.

    Is anyone else facing this unpaid leave nonsense? What are you doing to make sure and save enough?
  • @angeladowns1 I got AFLAC when we first started trying so I'll get 6 weeks paid and 6 weeks unpaid. I'm taking all 12 even with the six unpaid. DH will take off at least a month, preferably longer as well, all unpaid. It's crappy. I have giant rants about the ridiculous state of maternity/paternity leave in the United States. We're going to be able to delay some of our bills by three months which is super helpful. But it's so stressful. But the biggest thing will be trying to reduce expenses while we're out.
  • Good evening ladies,

    I apologize that I don't post nearly as much as I'd like to. I have read many of your posts and my heart goes out to all of you and your loved ones. Im also in aggreeance that stupid people in the community just don't know when to keep their mouths shut. 

    I thought several times tonight about posting a BF about coming home to the smell of stinky shrimp after a long day of work, but then I thought that was too minor. Clearly my DH heard me out and wanted me to have a reason to participate. I am still up after midnight and seeing red. After getting into an argument about me never being in the mood when pregnant, DH passive aggressively took himself bed. I let my pregnancy hormones get the best of me and I sat up mad crying and how selfish he is. Then when I calmed down enough to come to bed, he calls my name as I'm walking into the bedroom. I asked what he was doing. In a drunken stupor he replied, "I'm peeing." Only he's not in the bathroom - he's on my side of our bed peeing all over my end table. The end table was holding my business phone, tv remotes, both phone chargers, three bottles of water, and precious ultrasounds from current pregnancy and a framed one from my DS #1. The current ones were not protected by a frame. He instantly started yelling at me that he did not pee on it. So we go through the argument of what is it then? He tries to lay back down in bed. Me seeing red I just say "wrong choice - clean this mess up." He wipes down the end table with a paper towel, leaves the rest of the mess for me, and goes to sleep on the couch. I've had to stay up cleaning the wall and the floor and all the individual items. I am beyond furious. Normally I think of how I'd get even and then don't, because I think I'm a good wife and try to stay cool, calm, and collected. Tonight I have honestly had it. So I took it upon myself to play a little game. Now DH can go on his own private belated Easter egg hunt if he wants to find any of the things he should need to get ready for work tomorrow (i.e. Deodorant, keys, wallet, toothbrush, etc.). May the odds be ever in his favor. 
  • @angeladowns1 I also bought supplemental insurance for that purpose. I get six weeks paid at 50-60% (varies based on length of time with the company) from my work with vacation time supplementing the additional percentage and then the supplemental insurance will kicking after that.
  • My bitchfest is about money. My maternity leave is completely unpaid, and we keep getting farther and father behind on where we should be with what I budgeted for saving per month.

     It's so BEYOND frustrating, because several of the setbacks are totally unforeseen and not in our power. The latest? DH's car needing a $1500 repair. FIFTEEN HUNDRED DOLLARS. That's cool. I basically just see two weeks of time with my boys, gone. 

    It's like can I catch an effing break? I go back and forth between wanting to scream and wanting to cry under my covers and never come out.

    Is anyone else facing this unpaid leave nonsense? What are you doing to make sure and save enough?
    Yup, I'm able to take as much time off as I want but it will all be unpaid. To save we are moving into a less expensive apartment in July (renting from SO's parents) and both working as much overtime as we can get right now. I feel your pain because while it will be so nice for me to be able to stay home with the baby, SO will have to work even more hours to make up for my lack of income. So frustrating and stressful. Hang in there!
  • @mbates87 I have to agree with JessieR. I don't know anything about your marriage, but I was married to an alcoholic before I met DH. This sounds like he would have done. I hope your H gets some help if this is a drinking problem. 

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Me 34 DH 34 
    PCOS

    DS1 born September 2017
    Baby number 2 due 4/11/20
  • @angeladowns1 I only started at this company a year ago, so I will not have very much saved up in terms of sick/ vacation leave.  I was completely denied short term disability insurance (bc I was pregnant when I took the physical), but I'm fighting it.  So, for the moment, we're just saving as much as we can from every paycheck.  It's not a lot, but it should be enough to get me to 8-10w of maternity leave, if my STD insurance appeal is denied.  I'm lucky also, in that we can build up to a week of 'credit' hours that I can also use towards leave.  I wish we'd be able to wait longer before trying for another, so I could have more vacation/ sick time, but this is just how it's worked out!
    DS1: Born 11.18.15
    DS2: EDD- 09.08.17

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  • @mbates87 I agree with what everyone else has said. Sorry you are going through this. Keep us posted. Hope you are able to work through this.




  • @mbates87 I'm so sorry! What a traumatic thing to go through while pregnant (or any time). I hope he gives you a really good apology and is truly remorseful, and I also hope that's not a normal thing he does. If it is, maybe you should video him and let him watch it when he's sober. I hope he's embarrassed enough to not put you through that agin. 

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  • @mbates87 aw hell no! We'd be having a serious talk. His drinking would absolutely need to change before the baby comes. Good luck lady! 
  • @mbates87 I echo what others have said. The only real insight I have to this, is my brother. he was shit housed drunk and in his drunken stupor lifted the countertop off the bathroom vanity and while holding it up peed under the sink area, but it wasn't vicious, he seriously thought it was the toilet...a very hard one to open. His wife wasn't amused and he spent the next day cleaning and replacing the vanity. 

    I hope you 2 can come to terms with whatever you are going through, because that is not healthy behavior at all. 

    @angeladowns1 i am a 1099 employee on commission only income. I have zero paid leave, zero short term disability benefits, NADA. So I totally feel your pain. We've had some not so awesome things come up financially that has depleted savings, and every time I get it back to where it was something else comes up. We are also moving 8wks after baby is born, which is right before the holidays. I am in full panic, as I also do not know where we are moving to yet, so I cannot even begin job hunting. I feel your pain mama. 
  • @divinemsm620 I'm in the same boat  except no sore throat. I've been coughing and dealing with plegm nonstop for almost 3 weeks now.  Someone said it may be allergies, but I'm going to ask my doctor about it Friday during my appointment. 
  • @mbates87 I'm so sorry you had to deal with that. He needs to accept that things change during pregnancy, and you certainly didn't get pregnant by yourself so there are changes that you both have to deal with. It certainly isn't permanent and he needs to grow up. But I definitely agree that he owes you one hell of a good apology! 
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  • @mbates87 I agree with everyone that his behavior is not acceptable at all, but is there anyway he didn't realize what he was doing while peeing? Similar story to @labby18, my BIL once got up in the middle of the night, peed in their closet, and when my sister woke up she was like WTF are you doing? and he responded scrubbing and went back to bed and knocked out. She then had to get up and clean the closet in the middle of the night while he was knocked out.  He was drunk, they had a newborn and she let him go out for his best friends birthday, and he overdid it and drank too much. He woke up the next morning having no idea what happened. Not typical behavior for him and he felt super bad the next morning. I feel like sometimes boys pee in weird places while drunk. 

    Anyway - i hope he apologizes b/c that's not cool at all but he also could be totally unaware of what happened. 
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