Trying REALLY hard not to be annoyed about this but...
MIL copied and pasted my entire Facebook announcement yesterday to her own page. Then she messaged me and said "Did you see my announcement got 100 hits?!"
I'm glad she's excited, but still kind of annoyed that she can't just let us have our moment.
--------
I heart theSkimm I heart YNAB --------- “Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light." - Albus Dumbledore
Trying REALLY hard not to be annoyed about this but...
MIL copied and pasted my entire Facebook announcement yesterday to her own page. Then she messaged me and said "Did you see my announcement got 100 hits?!"
I'm glad she's excited, but still kind of annoyed that she can't just let us have our moment.
This is what I hate. People feel like it's their moment. No, you had your babies. I understand Facebook wasn't around back then but you still got to announce your pregnancy. I feel like people do this for attention. I get they are excited but have some boundaries people.
Sorry she took the moment away from you. Some people just don't understand when they are overstepping.
@beezeemarie It makes no sense and I've given up trying to understand. DH has tried to explain that she can't get autism because a) that's not a thing and b) that's DEFINITELY not a thing when you're a 60 year old woman, but she's adamant that vaccines are evil and she doesn't listen. I'm torn between blowing up at her for being a crazy person and letting her continue in her delusion so I won't have to have her around right after the baby is born
This. I bet we could find some crazy, delusional "articles" to back up her point if you really want to commit to this.
I heart theSkimm I heart YNAB --------- “Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light." - Albus Dumbledore
I like to think that we're actually a fairly open minded, level headed, mature group of gals. I mean, adults should be able to discuss topics with differing opinions without complete meltdowns, right?
Don't let me down, y'all.
BFP#1: 12/3/13 EDD 8/15/13. Heartbeat found on 12/26/13, HB gone on 1/4/13. D&C 1/7/13
BFP#2: 4/19/13 EDD 12/28/13. Team Green for pregnancy and Baby Girl arrived 12/21/13. BFP#3: 2/9/13 EDD 10/18/17. Team Green for Round 2!
I like to think that we're actually a fairly open minded, level headed, mature group of gals. I mean, adults should be able to discuss topics with differing opinions without complete meltdowns, right?
Don't let me down, y'all.
Those who have the meltdowns don't typically act like adults anyway.
I've got a couple of gripes, but they all involve my MIL. She started off strong... we were getting along but she's losing her dang mind.
My rant today is that over the weekend, her and DH got into quite a serious discussion. She's 47 years old and lives with us, doesn't pay rent, is single after two divorces. She's completely dependent on us other then her meager bills that she covers with her job.
Well, she recently met some random guy on Facebook in totally another state. He's supposedly in his early 30s and has a son. They are easily over 1000 miles away. Well, somehow, she got it into her head that she wanted HIM to move in with US.
nope. Uh Uh. Not happening. So DH of course is livid and scolding her as if she is some high school girl. The kicker is she is always talking smack about her friends who do this and knows we have a little girl on the way. NO way in heck that I am letting some strange man near her or myself. DH felt the same way and made that very clear. If she tries anything stupid, she is out on her butt in the streets with whoever she wants.
There was another incident earlier this year. She was in a minor fender bender with some car. We had already taught her what to do (aka, call the emergency line for police) well, of course, she doesn't! She calls us. Luckily, the person who caused the minor accident stayed and was very cooperative. We were so upset because it was our anniversary, it was so minor you couldn't even see it, and she did not learn or do as instructed.
It makes me very uncomfortable leaving my child in her care. She's starting to prove herself questionable and I'm just not cool with that. I'm now having to face a difficult decision of whether or not I leave my girl with her or start trying to work from home. I'm even worried that if I bar her from having a car seat, she will just strap her up and drive anyway. ugh.
@VLillyV I've come to the crazy realization lately that we (meaning me and DH but I'm sure several of you fall under this as well) are now more educated in life than our parents which I really don't know how to take. I mean we are both college grads and none of our parents received higher education. Plus I feel like we are more up to date on current events and more open minded about people of different backgrounds than ours. All of this to say, a few of our family members have made questionable decisions lately and you have to think WTF are you thinking!?!? Then I don't know whether to be mad or just sad for them.
Mine is also about my MIL. DH and I announced on social media yesterday. DH had sent his mom my weekly bump pic, which is literally all bloat. She texted me and asked me if she could post it on her FB. I texted her back and said "if you must, I'm pretty sure your friends don't care to see my bloat though." So then she went on to not only post it but also tag me in the post. I know I could have been more direct and just said no, but obviously I wasn't thrilled about her posting it and definitely didn't want to be tagged in it. A bunch of my friends liked the pic which is super embarrassing, I shared like 3 bump pics total last pregnancy and they were actual bump pics not bloat.
@natleilynn I can't stand when someone has to share someone else's news. It is almost as if they need people to know that they are close enough to know the news before everyone else. Maybe thats too deep IDK lol, it just bothers me.
@jessafishy I'm sorry you were dealing with that. It sounds like a petty insecurity that she has, where she needs constant reinforcement from others that she is valued. Not fair of her to project that on to other people though.
@canonmom413 I feel like you need a day at the spa. You have such a busy life! It kind of reminds me of Claire Dunphy from Modern Family. God I watch too much tv.
My MBF: People who show up obscenely early to get togethers. We had a pretty busy weekend as well, and MIL volunteered our house to have everyone come for Easter, because she is fighting with half the family and no one else would host. Everyone was supposed to arrive 3 to 4ish, MIL showed up at 11am...of course I'm not ready, both DH and I are frantically cleaning the house because we like to procrastinate cleaning at all costs. While DH was outside, she told me she decided to come early so that I could help her put the Easter stuff together for the kids. I told her I couldn't, and I still needed to shower after everything. As soon as DH comes in, she told him that she came here early to help us clean, so whatever he needed help with, to let her know. As soon as he walked back out, she asked if I could go to the store to get drinks, since we aren't contributing as much as last year...the only thing we didn't bring was the ham, we prepared everything else (and we did have drinks). And of course at the end of the night, she left her huge mess of egg/confetti explosion without even offering to help clean it up.
Me: 31 DH:35 TTC #1: March 2011 Fur-children: 3 dogs + 2 cats (all rescued) dx: Endometriosis and Fibroids 2 Laps and 1 Abdominal Myomectomy 6 rounds of clomid 5 rounds of iui IVF #1 Gonal F, Menopur and Cetrotide ER 12/1/2016:Retrieved 22 eggs 12 fertilized, developed moderate OHSS 4/4 day 5 embryos were normal for PGS!!! 2 boys/2 girls FET 1/10/2017 Gallbladder surgery 1/10/2017 FET 2/2 BFP 2/7/17 Beta#1: 594!!! Beta#2 1630!!! Having a girl! EDD 10/21/17
@ChocolateIsLife That's so annoying! Plus I think even if I thought that someone didn't contribute "as much as last year" I wouldn't say anything, super tacky! And you guys hosted on top of that, yikes!
@natleilynn I can't stand when someone has to share someone else's news. It is almost as if they need people to know that they are close enough to know the news before everyone else. Maybe thats too deep IDK lol, it just bothers me.
@jessafishy I'm sorry you were dealing with that. It sounds like a petty insecurity that she has, where she needs constant reinforcement from others that she is valued. Not fair of her to project that on to other people though.
@canonmom413 I feel like you need a day at the spa. You have such a busy life! It kind of reminds me of Claire Dunphy from Modern Family. God I watch too much tv.
My MBF: People who show up obscenely early to get togethers. We had a pretty busy weekend as well, and MIL volunteered our house to have everyone come for Easter, because she is fighting with half the family and no one else would host. Everyone was supposed to arrive 3 to 4ish, MIL showed up at 11am...of course I'm not ready, both DH and I are frantically cleaning the house because we like to procrastinate cleaning at all costs. While DH was outside, she told me she decided to come early so that I could help her put the Easter stuff together for the kids. I told her I couldn't, and I still needed to shower after everything. As soon as DH comes in, she told him that she came here early to help us clean, so whatever he needed help with, to let her know. As soon as he walked back out, she asked if I could go to the store to get drinks, since we aren't contributing as much as last year...the only thing we didn't bring was the ham, we prepared everything else (and we did have drinks). And of course at the end of the night, she left her huge mess of egg/confetti explosion without even offering to help clean it up.
Yikes. I hate when people show up early too, but I can't believe she came that early to have YOU help HER. And I can't believe she volunteered your house.
I feel like this board needs an in-laws vent thread.
@nbcarlson and @oliveoyl2014 It really was a "yikes" situation We usually do all the cooking, drinks, ice, host, clean up afterwards etc, but it gets expensive, and DH has a pretty big family. It would be nice if people offered to help. She told DH it needed to be at our house or we couldn't have an Easter get together (because of all the different feuds she has going on).
2nd MBF: FTMs, did you guys get any "just you wait" comments over the weekend while around friends/family? Me and DH started counting because everyone seemed to have a question, following a "just you wait" story, and I couldn't stop laughing towards the end of the night. I'm thinking this is a rite of passage type of thing. It honestly didn't bother me, but the amount of times we were both told this over the weekend made it comical.
example: FIL: Are you more tired lately? me: A little, but its getting much better FIL: Just you wait, you don't know what tired is until you have a baby.
SMIL: When do you leave for your trip? me: in about a month SMIL: Just you wait, once baby comes, you will say goodbye to vacations. There is no such thing as a vacation once you have a child.
Me: 31 DH:35 TTC #1: March 2011 Fur-children: 3 dogs + 2 cats (all rescued) dx: Endometriosis and Fibroids 2 Laps and 1 Abdominal Myomectomy 6 rounds of clomid 5 rounds of iui IVF #1 Gonal F, Menopur and Cetrotide ER 12/1/2016:Retrieved 22 eggs 12 fertilized, developed moderate OHSS 4/4 day 5 embryos were normal for PGS!!! 2 boys/2 girls FET 1/10/2017 Gallbladder surgery 1/10/2017 FET 2/2 BFP 2/7/17 Beta#1: 594!!! Beta#2 1630!!! Having a girl! EDD 10/21/17
@bluejeanbabi05 one response should be selective vaccinations (doing some, but not all), and/or delayed vaccinations (slower time table than generally done).
October 2017 June Siggy Challenge -- "You Had One Job!"
@vlillyv oh my that is an intense situation with you MIL. I don't think I would be comfortable leaving my baby with her either, simply because she doesn't seem to be making sound judgment calls. How did she react when you told her she couldn't have her FB boyfriend move in?
Me: 31 DH:35 TTC #1: March 2011 Fur-children: 3 dogs + 2 cats (all rescued) dx: Endometriosis and Fibroids 2 Laps and 1 Abdominal Myomectomy 6 rounds of clomid 5 rounds of iui IVF #1 Gonal F, Menopur and Cetrotide ER 12/1/2016:Retrieved 22 eggs 12 fertilized, developed moderate OHSS 4/4 day 5 embryos were normal for PGS!!! 2 boys/2 girls FET 1/10/2017 Gallbladder surgery 1/10/2017 FET 2/2 BFP 2/7/17 Beta#1: 594!!! Beta#2 1630!!! Having a girl! EDD 10/21/17
@ChocolateIsLife YES and it drives me CRAZY! My FIL is the worst about this. DH loves to travel and is climbing Kilimanjaro in July and FIL keeps making comments about how he better enjoy it because it'll be his last adventure for the next 18 years. They make having children sound so dismal and joyless, it's terrible.
My MBF is about my mother. My cousin gave birth last Wed, very excited being her first child and yay I'm on Spring Break and can go visit. I was supposed to go with my parents (cousin lives 2hrs away in another state). I am only traveling with my parents cuz pregnancy makes public transport too uncomfortable for me. Well my mom's friend said she was tagging along, but insisted that we go and come back on Sat.
There was no way I could agree to that. It already takes me nearly 1.5hrs to get to my parents, then 2hrs on the road minimum to get to my cousin. To then repeat that again the same day with my nausea and motion sickness? So I cancelled the trip and said I won't join them unless they come back on Sun. Mom said no, her friend had to be back Sat night. I'm annoyed I won't meet the baby for a few more weeks.
It doesn't even end there. Mom calls me Sat evening to say that they decided to stay overnight after all. Top it all off, my godmother and uncle from a different town had also gone down to meet the baby. They missed my wedding in Nov because of a death in their family. They were also with their son who missed the wedding because he was deployed in the Navy. I feel like I got cheated on such a good mini family reunion because my mom wanted to accommodate her friend who ended up having no plans she needed to be back for. Plus my dad said he won't drive out there anytime soon so I'll have to either wait several weeks to meet the baby or suck it up and go public transport which will take over 4hrs
I can't remember who all I need to tag in this at this point and my brain is already gone for a Monday...
But here's the deal. Yes, your life will change once you have a kid(s).
No, your life is not over.
Date nights are still a thing. Getaways are still a thing. Socializing with friends is still a thing. Having fun (both with the kids and without) is still a thing.
Can you go out every night and get obliterated? It's frowned upon.
I've noticed that people like to give worst case scenarios about everything in life. "the first year of marriage is the worst!" "Having kids will destroy your social life!" "I was in labor for 129 hours before they gave me the epidural!" Bottom line, life is what you make of it. Kids are a game changer, but not the end.
BFP#1: 12/3/13 EDD 8/15/13. Heartbeat found on 12/26/13, HB gone on 1/4/13. D&C 1/7/13
BFP#2: 4/19/13 EDD 12/28/13. Team Green for pregnancy and Baby Girl arrived 12/21/13. BFP#3: 2/9/13 EDD 10/18/17. Team Green for Round 2!
@ChocolateIsLife Thanks for sympathizing, it's just such a messy situation.
Her reaction was to cry(sob) and ask my DH if he preferred her leave and be on her own. DH was calm and simply said it was her decision but that no stranger would be moving into our home.
@winterecho That is really such a huge let down. I'm sorry you're going through that right now. Big time horrible and I really hope that you at least get to see the LO soon
@migdala ahh that is so frustrating I think certain people get some sort of satisfaction from telling others that things will be less as enjoyable.
@natleilynn I couldn't agree more. We have no doubt that things will change (drastically) and be challenging/difficult/intense at times, and I know it is all easy to say this before hand. I want to do everything I can to have date nights and plan vacations. We are friends with a couple that we are really close with. I seriously love how they travel with their daughter so much. They always traveled before she was born, and everyone told them they were done once she was born, but they never slowed down, because that was such a big priority for them to keep traveling, and their baby girl loves it. I'm sure they lucked out a bit because she is such an easy going baby as well.
Me: 31 DH:35 TTC #1: March 2011 Fur-children: 3 dogs + 2 cats (all rescued) dx: Endometriosis and Fibroids 2 Laps and 1 Abdominal Myomectomy 6 rounds of clomid 5 rounds of iui IVF #1 Gonal F, Menopur and Cetrotide ER 12/1/2016:Retrieved 22 eggs 12 fertilized, developed moderate OHSS 4/4 day 5 embryos were normal for PGS!!! 2 boys/2 girls FET 1/10/2017 Gallbladder surgery 1/10/2017 FET 2/2 BFP 2/7/17 Beta#1: 594!!! Beta#2 1630!!! Having a girl! EDD 10/21/17
Re: Monday Bitchfest | 4.17.17
MIL copied and pasted my entire Facebook announcement yesterday to her own page. Then she messaged me and said "Did you see my announcement got 100 hits?!"
I'm glad she's excited, but still kind of annoyed that she can't just let us have our moment.
I heart YNAB
---------
“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times,
if one only remembers to turn on the light."
- Albus Dumbledore
Sorry she took the moment away from you. Some people just don't understand when they are overstepping.
I heart YNAB
---------
“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times,
if one only remembers to turn on the light."
- Albus Dumbledore
*gif of person creepily laughing*
*creepy sniffing gif*
Don't let me down, y'all.
BFP#3: 2/9/13 EDD 10/18/17. Team Green for Round 2!
My rant today is that over the weekend, her and DH got into quite a serious discussion. She's 47 years old and lives with us, doesn't pay rent, is single after two divorces. She's completely dependent on us other then her meager bills that she covers with her job.
Well, she recently met some random guy on Facebook in totally another state. He's supposedly in his early 30s and has a son. They are easily over 1000 miles away. Well, somehow, she got it into her head that she wanted HIM to move in with US.
nope. Uh Uh. Not happening. So DH of course is livid and scolding her as if she is some high school girl. The kicker is she is always talking smack about her friends who do this and knows we have a little girl on the way. NO way in heck that I am letting some strange man near her or myself. DH felt the same way and made that very clear. If she tries anything stupid, she is out on her butt in the streets with whoever she wants.
There was another incident earlier this year. She was in a minor fender bender with some car. We had already taught her what to do (aka, call the emergency line for police) well, of course, she doesn't! She calls us. Luckily, the person who caused the minor accident stayed and was very cooperative. We were so upset because it was our anniversary, it was so minor you couldn't even see it, and she did not learn or do as instructed.
It makes me very uncomfortable leaving my child in her care. She's starting to prove herself questionable and I'm just not cool with that. I'm now having to face a difficult decision of whether or not I leave my girl with her or start trying to work from home. I'm even worried that if I bar her from having a car seat, she will just strap her up and drive anyway. ugh.
*dear diary over*
Edit: the spelling
@jessafishy I'm sorry you were dealing with that. It sounds like a petty insecurity that she has, where she needs constant reinforcement from others that she is valued. Not fair of her to project that on to other people though.
@canonmom413 I feel like you need a day at the spa. You have such a busy life! It kind of reminds me of Claire Dunphy from Modern Family. God I watch too much tv.
My MBF: People who show up obscenely early to get togethers. We had a pretty busy weekend as well, and MIL volunteered our house to have everyone come for Easter, because she is fighting with half the family and no one else would host. Everyone was supposed to arrive 3 to 4ish, MIL showed up at 11am...of course I'm not ready, both DH and I are frantically cleaning the house because we like to procrastinate cleaning at all costs. While DH was outside, she told me she decided to come early so that I could help her put the Easter stuff together for the kids. I told her I couldn't, and I still needed to shower after everything. As soon as DH comes in, she told him that she came here early to help us clean, so whatever he needed help with, to let her know. As soon as he walked back out, she asked if I could go to the store to get drinks, since we aren't contributing as much as last year...the only thing we didn't bring was the ham, we prepared everything else (and we did have drinks). And of course at the end of the night, she left her huge mess of egg/confetti explosion without even offering to help clean it up.
TTC #1: March 2011
Fur-children: 3 dogs + 2 cats (all rescued)
dx: Endometriosis and Fibroids
2 Laps and 1 Abdominal Myomectomy
6 rounds of clomid
5 rounds of iui
IVF #1 Gonal F, Menopur and Cetrotide
ER 12/1/2016:Retrieved 22 eggs 12 fertilized, developed moderate OHSS
4/4 day 5 embryos were normal for PGS!!! 2 boys/2 girls
FET 1/10/2017
Gallbladder surgery 1/10/2017
FET 2/2
BFP 2/7/17
Having a girl! EDD 10/21/17
I feel like this board needs an in-laws vent thread.
2nd MBF: FTMs, did you guys get any "just you wait" comments over the weekend while around friends/family? Me and DH started counting because everyone seemed to have a question, following a "just you wait" story, and I couldn't stop laughing towards the end of the night. I'm thinking this is a rite of passage type of thing. It honestly didn't bother me, but the amount of times we were both told this over the weekend made it comical.
example:
FIL: Are you more tired lately?
me: A little, but its getting much better
FIL: Just you wait, you don't know what tired is until you have a baby.
SMIL: When do you leave for your trip?
me: in about a month
SMIL: Just you wait, once baby comes, you will say goodbye to vacations. There is no such thing as a vacation once you have a child.
TTC #1: March 2011
Fur-children: 3 dogs + 2 cats (all rescued)
dx: Endometriosis and Fibroids
2 Laps and 1 Abdominal Myomectomy
6 rounds of clomid
5 rounds of iui
IVF #1 Gonal F, Menopur and Cetrotide
ER 12/1/2016:Retrieved 22 eggs 12 fertilized, developed moderate OHSS
4/4 day 5 embryos were normal for PGS!!! 2 boys/2 girls
FET 1/10/2017
Gallbladder surgery 1/10/2017
FET 2/2
BFP 2/7/17
Having a girl! EDD 10/21/17
I had to get a TDAP for my job, I did not, repeat, did not get Autism from it.
*the more ya know*
ETA: because you can't post fun stuff on mobile
a) Yes I'm vaccinating, I'm not an idiot!
b) No I'm not vaccinating, are you an idiot?
BFP#3: 2/9/13 EDD 10/18/17. Team Green for Round 2!
TTC #1: March 2011
Fur-children: 3 dogs + 2 cats (all rescued)
dx: Endometriosis and Fibroids
2 Laps and 1 Abdominal Myomectomy
6 rounds of clomid
5 rounds of iui
IVF #1 Gonal F, Menopur and Cetrotide
ER 12/1/2016:Retrieved 22 eggs 12 fertilized, developed moderate OHSS
4/4 day 5 embryos were normal for PGS!!! 2 boys/2 girls
FET 1/10/2017
Gallbladder surgery 1/10/2017
FET 2/2
BFP 2/7/17
Having a girl! EDD 10/21/17
There was no way I could agree to that. It already takes me nearly 1.5hrs to get to my parents, then 2hrs on the road minimum to get to my cousin. To then repeat that again the same day with my nausea and motion sickness? So I cancelled the trip and said I won't join them unless they come back on Sun. Mom said no, her friend had to be back Sat night. I'm annoyed I won't meet the baby for a few more weeks.
It doesn't even end there. Mom calls me Sat evening to say that they decided to stay overnight after all. Top it all off, my godmother and uncle from a different town had also gone down to meet the baby. They missed my wedding in Nov because of a death in their family. They were also with their son who missed the wedding because he was deployed in the Navy. I feel like I got cheated on such a good mini family reunion because my mom wanted to accommodate her friend who ended up having no plans she needed to be back for. Plus my dad said he won't drive out there anytime soon so I'll have to either wait several weeks to meet the baby or suck it up and go public transport which will take over 4hrs
Married: 11/12/16
BFP: 02/09/17
FTM | EDD: 10/13/17
But here's the deal. Yes, your life will change once you have a kid(s).
No, your life is not over.
Date nights are still a thing. Getaways are still a thing. Socializing with friends is still a thing. Having fun (both with the kids and without) is still a thing.
Can you go out every night and get obliterated? It's frowned upon.
I've noticed that people like to give worst case scenarios about everything in life. "the first year of marriage is the worst!" "Having kids will destroy your social life!" "I was in labor for 129 hours before they gave me the epidural!" Bottom line, life is what you make of it. Kids are a game changer, but not the end.
BFP#3: 2/9/13 EDD 10/18/17. Team Green for Round 2!
Her reaction was to cry(sob) and ask my DH if he preferred her leave and be on her own. DH was calm and simply said it was her decision but that no stranger would be moving into our home.
BFP#3: 2/9/13 EDD 10/18/17. Team Green for Round 2!
@natleilynn your gif made me giggle XD
@winterecho That is really such a huge let down. I'm sorry you're going through that right now. Big time horrible and I really hope that you at least get to see the LO soon
@migdala ahh that is so frustrating
@natleilynn I couldn't agree more. We have no doubt that things will change (drastically) and be challenging/difficult/intense at times, and I know it is all easy to say this before hand. I want to do everything I can to have date nights and plan vacations. We are friends with a couple that we are really close with. I seriously love how they travel with their daughter so much. They always traveled before she was born, and everyone told them they were done once she was born, but they never slowed down, because that was such a big priority for them to keep traveling, and their baby girl loves it. I'm sure they lucked out a bit because she is such an easy going baby as well.
TTC #1: March 2011
Fur-children: 3 dogs + 2 cats (all rescued)
dx: Endometriosis and Fibroids
2 Laps and 1 Abdominal Myomectomy
6 rounds of clomid
5 rounds of iui
IVF #1 Gonal F, Menopur and Cetrotide
ER 12/1/2016:Retrieved 22 eggs 12 fertilized, developed moderate OHSS
4/4 day 5 embryos were normal for PGS!!! 2 boys/2 girls
FET 1/10/2017
Gallbladder surgery 1/10/2017
FET 2/2
BFP 2/7/17
Having a girl! EDD 10/21/17