Easter related confession: I hate Peeps. They are super gross. My SIL brought us some blue Peeps to celebrate the baby boy. I took them to work. No one there ate them either. I'm pretty sure they got thrown away after a few days.
I'm not a big peeps fan either, but if you ever have a fire you should try roasting them like a marshmallow. Almost tastes like creme brûlée!
I hope this doesn't come across as hateful or mean, but just a different view. @Lizlann do you think not getting a Bachelors will impact their ability to secure a job? I ask because I was a bit surprised at your comment. In my line of work, when I was in a lead position, HR wouldn't even give me candidates to interview if they didn't have a bachelors at a minimum. Now that being said, I will also say, I don't necessarily agree with that because my job is a specialized job and is not learned in school. Those without degrees are certainly capable of doing my job. I'm just curious where you are coming from.
I think it depends largely on the field. I understand that many professions require a bachelors. My profession requires a masters and we won't hire anyone without it. But I don't think taking a year or two to gain more real world experience before deciding to pursue a 4 year degree is going to hurt anyone too much in the long run. In fact, I think it changes their perspective and helps them develop a stronger commitment. That's really what I meant when I said "at least not a 4 year college right away." I can't tell you how many people I know who went to college on their parents' dime, dicked around for four or more years, and didn't end up actually learning much of anything. I want my kids to go through a journey of self discovery before they jump into college just because that's what they're expected to do.
Also, I think society needs seriously reflect on this whole idea that people "need" a bachelor's degree before they can qualify for a job. With the insanely skyrocketing costs of higher education in the US, college is becoming increasingly unattainable for so many families. We either need to change our hiring/employment practices or change higher education (or probably both, actually). We'll see what ends up changing first...
ETA: @labby18 articulated things in detail that really explains my perspective. Thanks!
**TW**
Me & DH: 32 Married 2013 Kiddo #1: Sept 2015 BFP: 1/19, EDD: 9/30
"I'm having fruit salad for dinner. Well, it's mostly just grapes, actually. Ok all grapes. Fermented grapes. Fine, I'm having wine for dinner."
@labby18 I have felt your pain. About a year ago we got rid of our queen sized old as dirt mattress and bought a king sized temperpedic adjustable bed. I thought I hated it at first and that we made a huge mistake, but the guy told us at the store told us to give it 3 weeks. Now it's heaven! My grandpa has a sleep number and we slept in their room a few nights (they weren't in there!) and it was pretty comparable to me. But I love how when DH (or the dog) is moving around i don't feel it. I'm a light sleeper.
Dh and I are following what @lap018 is doing almost exactly, it's what his parents were able to do for him and we see the value in it . I had to pay my own way through. I can tell you I don't think it was that great of a learning experience to be extra broke and struggling to make your food stretch between semesters, among other things. I had to make some pretty tough choices to be able to afford to stay in school - I'm not putting my kids through that. Part of the reason we're stopping at 2 kids is because we want to ensure we can properly afford to do these things for them.
We're keeping our fingers crossed that I'm still working at the university that I'm at right now when they are college age and they want to go there- it's free for me, my spouse and all dependants
I will definitely be saving for my children's tuition and anything that I can help them with. Neither of my parents went to college (nor did their parents) and they did not necessarily save an amount for my sister and I to use for college but they worked hard and paid for my undergraduate education and for that I am so thankful. I was expected to try to get scholarships which I did and for 2 years I worked as an RA so my room and board were covered. I got loans for PA school but worked in an underserved area for 2 years to have those loans paid off. My parents bought me a new (not super expensive) car and covered my insurance. I did get a job at 16. If my children are doing well in school and making good choices, not getting in trouble I will gladly get them a new car and help them where I can while teaching them responsibility. If they do not feel college is for them, that is ok, but they will need to have some sort of plan.
FFFC: My almost 2 year old sleeps in our bed most of the time and at 4 AM we awake to him crying. Apparently he tried to get out of bed or was sleeping/dreaming and somehow was getting off the bed. There is a gap between our mattress and footboard and the poor guy was stuck standing between them. I couldn't help but laugh while feeling bad at the same time. We got him back in bed and he snuggled right up but I'm still confused how that happened.
@Lizlann that makes total sense. I definitely agree with you that society does need to change. Like I said, my profession (software development) doesn't need college. It would be much better for trade school, but most companies wont even consider without the degree. Experience is much more valuable. That being said, one of my best friends from college, went on to get her Masters and she still cant find a job she likes or is qualified for . She is a finance assistant at a car dealer. I also agree that some kids just need a couple of years before going to school. College has turned into a 4 year party time for most and not a 4 year education.
We will definitely set money aside for our kid(s) to use in some aspect someday but I'm also in the boat of not forcing them to attend a 4 year university especially immediately after high school. I have a bachelor's degree and DH graduated high school. Our salaries are comparable, we are definitely not "rich" but we live a very comfortable life and we're both happy with what we do. My job could very easily be done without a degree even though it is a requirement to have one. When I went to college, I had absolutely no idea what I wanted to do with my life. I still didn't even after graduating with my degree in business management. I just happened to have an aunt that worked in finance and she passed along my resume which got me an interview and here I am, 10 years later. So yea, I'm very lucky to have the job I have in many aspects but I wish I'd had more time to really get to know myself and my interests a bit more before making such big (and expensive) decisions. That's what I'd want for my kids just in case they end up like me, being 18 and having no clue what they want out of life.
Me & DH: 31 | Married: 5.4.13 | TTC: April 2016 | BFP: 1.8.17 | EDD: 9.13.17
My parents paid for all of our undergrad degrees (there are 4 of us), however, only two of us graduated. One only wanted to play music and my parents finally quit forcing him. The other failed out because he partied too hard and my parents said enough. I do have $50K in grad school loans I'm a little bitter about because they told my younger brother they would pay for his masters degree, but not mine. They told me that they know I'm ok and I can pay for it. I'm paying a lot each month to knock that out so we can buy a new car and renovate. Anyways, we plan on paying what we can for each child and helping them out when we can. My parents did that with me growing up and I greatly appreciated it. My job requires a masters degree. There isn't any way around it, but if they want to go to trade school, I'm all for it!
As far as the college tuition is concerned, I definitely want to lean toward encouraging my daughter to get scholarships and grants because she is most definitely capable of doing so. For myself, my parents did not set me up in any way for the future. I bought my own vehicles, and have had to wrack up a lot of student loan debt because I didn't understand or have anyone to coach or guide me through the process of paying for college. I'll be paying off these loans for many many years to come.
I want to provide more for my children than my parents did for me but I also want them to be ambitious and work hard. Because I think that what I went through shaped me to be the incredibly hard working ambitious person I am today.
After we have the baby and get better settled financially I plan on saving for both of them to have a safety net to get them through at least a portion of their college. And of course I will never have my children struggle in their adulthood. So if they need help affording food, etc. we will most definitely be there for them.
Easter related confession: I hate Peeps. They are super gross. My SIL brought us some blue Peeps to celebrate the baby boy. I took them to work. No one there ate them either. I'm pretty sure they got thrown away after a few days.
I'm not a big peeps fan either, but if you ever have a fire you should try roasting them like a marshmallow. Almost tastes like creme brûlée!
This is the only way to eat Peeps. We put them on S'mores last year.
My parents paid for all of our undergrad degrees (there are 4 of us), however, only two of us graduated. One only wanted to play music and my parents finally quit forcing him. The other failed out because he partied too hard and my parents said enough. I do have $50K in grad school loans I'm a little bitter about because they told my younger brother they would pay for his masters degree, but not mine. They told me that they know I'm ok and I can pay for it. I'm paying a lot each month to knock that out so we can buy a new car and renovate. Anyways, we plan on paying what we can for each child and helping them out when we can. My parents did that with me growing up and I greatly appreciated it. My job requires a masters degree. There isn't any way around it, but if they want to go to trade school, I'm all for it!
My in-laws did something similar. At one point during college, they decided DH wasn't taking it seriously enough, so they stopped paying any of his tuition, and he was completely on his own. They said if he could go a year with good grades and prove he was working hard and cared about his degree they would give him back their financial support. He did everything they asked and more, working a part time job in addition to joining a traveling musical ensemble that paid for part of his tuition and all his food and board, but took up two nights a week and 9 out of 10 weekends. ( @mrsmarygs, He actually performed with them at your college many times!) They never helped him again. Their reasoning was "he seemed like he had it all handled." He did not. He was incredibly stressed through his last three years of school, and actually took an extra year to graduate because he couldn't support himself and complete the internship he needed to graduate- my parents ended up stepping in and helping him enough that semester to survive, and we were only engaged at the time. His parents did sort of make up for it years down the road when he lost his job, but honestly, we would rather have had fewer student loans all along, especially since he had a whole extra years worth to pay off. I want my children know the value of hard work and to be ambitious, but I don't ever want them to be as stressed about money in college as DH was (he use to get migraines from stress, and would get physically sick when his bills would come due) knowing that we have the means to help them and we just don't. I can't wrap my mind around how his parents did that to him.
We have a college fund for DS, and will have one for this LO as well. We just don't make enough money to pay for an entire college education for two kids, especially at the rate the prices are increasing. That being said, I'm willing to put aside what we can afford, even if it's only a little bit, to make sure my kids have a chance to go to college if they want to do so.
I pay for college loans still, as does my DH. We both worked during college, too. But we also had the support we needed from our parents, and I was certainly capable of appreciating it without working to the point of exhaustion all the time. I think kids can go to college, have financial support, and still recognize that it's not an easy thing to finance. My older brother went to college, screwed around, and my parents pulled him out of school after his second semester. He didn't appreciate what he had, and threw it out the window with both hands. He's 35, and just finally finished his BS a year or two ago, as he had to work and take classes at the same time for years.
I see nothing wrong with helping my kids get an education. And if they decide they don't want to go to college or trade school, well, the great part is that the funds can be transferred to another family member's name instead. They won't be wasted.
I would love to help my children through college. I will definitely at the very least help by cosigning on loans. My first priority will be saving for my retirement and future, because I want to make sure I'm taken care of and don't leave them to take care of me. If there is money left, they will get it. My parents didn't help me with college(they didn't go and I dont thin see the value in it) and I'm concerned that they also aren't saving for their retirement. My mother in law also isn't prepared for elderly life. We will be taking on a lot financially at that time. Lastly, I am still not finished attending college myself, nor is my husband. Hopefully we will be in a better place financially after that is completed.
I would love to help my children through college. I will definitely at the very least help by cosigning on loans. My first priority will be saving for my retirement and future, because I want to make sure I'm taken care of and don't leave them to take care of me. If there is money left, they will get it. My parents didn't help me with college(they didn't go and I dont thin see the value in it) and I'm concerned that they also aren't saving for their retirement. My mother in law also isn't prepared for elderly life. We will be taking on a lot financially at that time. Lastly, I am still not finished attending college myself, nor is my husband. Hopefully we will be in a better place financially after that is completed.
Ugh, retirement is a whole other beast. DH does some day trading on the side, and in the past wanted that to be our retirement. Which stressed me out to no end. Now that the reality of this baby is sinking in, I think I'm finally winning the argument of putting a lot of that into safer investments, and not risking our entire future on what is essentially his hobby job. (Well, this baby, and the reality of seeing his dad being unable to retire because of some unfortunate situations. I'm not happy that my in laws are going through that, but I'm glad it opened DH's eyes a little bit.)
I would love to help my children through college. I will definitely at the very least help by cosigning on loans. My first priority will be saving for my retirement and future, because I want to make sure I'm taken care of and don't leave them to take care of me. If there is money left, they will get it. My parents didn't help me with college(they didn't go and I dont thin see the value in it) and I'm concerned that they also aren't saving for their retirement. My mother in law also isn't prepared for elderly life. We will be taking on a lot financially at that time. Lastly, I am still not finished attending college myself, nor is my husband. Hopefully we will be in a better place financially after that is completed.
Ugh, retirement is a whole other beast. DH does some day trading on the side, and in the past wanted that to be our retirement. Which stressed me out to no end. Now that the reality of this baby is sinking in, I think I'm finally winning the argument of putting a lot of that into safer investments, and not risking our entire future on what is essentially his hobby job. (Well, this baby, and the reality of seeing his dad being unable to retire because of some unfortunate situations. I'm not happy that my in laws are going through that, but I'm glad it opened DH's eyes a little bit.)
Retirement planning is so stressful. Apparently the 10% rule is now 14% (anyone know if this is actually true or just fear mongering since the stock market isn't doing as well as it did historically?). Who the F can invest 14% of their income and still survive day to day expenses?
FFFC inspired by everything going on here today.... I'm apparently still figuring out how to be a real functioning adult. DH and I haven't really talked about retirement, we are horrible at saving, we've got a 529 plan for DS but our savings is severely lacking. I don't understand a lot of how retirement stuff works, we have some money invested but so far I think we've only made like $80 from that? There's more but it all pretty muchjust comes back to learning how to adult.
@wyomama0427 We didn't have any of that stuff figured out yet when we were your age either. Shoot, we didn't make enough money to even be able to think about saving, we were lucky to eat and pay bills. As your DH figures out where his career is going, you guys will work it out.
@lilpoots I really admire your reasoning. It's not necessarily something I've thought of, but I agree, it is important to set yourself up for retirement first. I'm 31 and have a friend who's father recently had a stroke (she's only a year older than me). He can't work anymore and doesn't have much in terms of savings or retirement. It's been incredibly stressful for her and her sisters trying to figure out what they can do both physically and financially to help. I don't want to put my kiddos through something like that, and unfortunately, as much as you plan to work and retire at __ years, life always surprises you.
I would love to help my children through college. I will definitely at the very least help by cosigning on loans. My first priority will be saving for my retirement and future, because I want to make sure I'm taken care of and don't leave them to take care of me. If there is money left, they will get it. My parents didn't help me with college(they didn't go and I dont thin see the value in it) and I'm concerned that they also aren't saving for their retirement. My mother in law also isn't prepared for elderly life. We will be taking on a lot financially at that time. Lastly, I am still not finished attending college myself, nor is my husband. Hopefully we will be in a better place financially after that is completed.
Ugh, retirement is a whole other beast. DH does some day trading on the side, and in the past wanted that to be our retirement. Which stressed me out to no end. Now that the reality of this baby is sinking in, I think I'm finally winning the argument of putting a lot of that into safer investments, and not risking our entire future on what is essentially his hobby job. (Well, this baby, and the reality of seeing his dad being unable to retire because of some unfortunate situations. I'm not happy that my in laws are going through that, but I'm glad it opened DH's eyes a little bit.)
Retirement planning is so stressful. Apparently the 10% rule is now 14% (anyone know if this is actually true or just fear mongering since the stock market isn't doing as well as it did historically?). Who the F can invest 14% of their income and still survive day to day expenses?
I haven't heard the 14%. I know our financial advisor has told my DH and I to up our contributions. I contribute 6% and my DH contributes 6 or 7 I think. We need to increase it to decrease our taxable income actually. They are both matched up to 6% as well. I'm always freaking out about retirement like ah we don't have enough! But it's what we can do right now. We also have a separate mutual fund that our financial advisor handles. For the longest time DH wanted to do it himself and I said no. He "invested" in what turned out to be a Ponzi scheme...let me just say it was a big told you so because I saw it all along. We weren't married so I didn't have as much say. luckily it wasn't a lot of money but I'll never let him live that down lol.
We have an RESP set up for DS and will set one up for this baby as soon as he/she is born. My dad has been incredibly generous in funding it so far and I've been putting all the Baby Bonus payments I get into it. He will have a nice base in his future.
I went to university out of town and my parents paid tuition but I paid everything else from part-time work and summer jobs. They still bought me groceries when they visited and stuff like that but I had to learn balance and budgeting without getting over stressed. DH went to college but lived at home. His parents helped but he also worked part-time and had an inheritance to live from when he did his internship. We both finished debt free. I then went to law school which I paid for but lived with DH (back before we were married). I had student loans but repaid them really quickly with DH's help. We want to make sure DS knows that he has to work and figure out how to be a responsible person but not to the point of being worn thin.
My parents didn't pay for anything for my brother or I. We both worked for everything we did. I was 15 and worked 3 jobs on top of being in school full time just so that I could pay for a major oral surgery that was required to avoid a total palette (spelling??) collapse. My parents wouldn't pay a dime of it. They told the oral surgeon to just let it collapse and then Medicaid might pay for a fix. I kept working 3 jobs plus an internship at a biochem lab so I could put myself through college. It definitely made college suck balls because I had no life but school and work.
I don't want my kids to go through anything like that. While I doubt we will ever be able to pay for their whole college tuition, I do plan to help them with what we can afford. I won't require them to go to college. I will be happy to help them with a trade school too if that's what they would prefer.
Retirement can be confusing and somewhat scary. Right now I'm putting in 2.5% which my work is matching. After I've been on staff for 5 years, it will go up to 5% match, so I'll up my retirement then. DH has the same plan as me since we work at the same college. The portfolio we use is just one that our financial advisor at the college said we should use at this young of an age. It's a pretty "risky" portfolio, but we'll change it to moderate as we get older.
FFFC: I am still incredibly bitter towards the in laws. They did not help dh at all during college. He bought his own vehicle, paid for his own living etc. The last year of his schooling, year 6 because he had to work so much to make enough money and couldn't take as many clases, he actually moved in with me (we were engaged). He focused on school and worked a small part time time on weekends at night. I supported him. I provided him food, shelter, I cosigned a private loan for him since he went through all the public loans. All so he could graduate. We were married later that year after graduation, and filed taxes the next year. I expected us to be able to take all the education credits for him.
Nope. Guess what. His mother claimed they supported him and paid his student loans and she took all the education credits. I was PISSED and still haven't let it go.. obviously...
Me: 27 years old DH: 27 years old Type 1 Diabetes since 2001, MTHFR hetero A1298T Dogs: Raider 4 yrs, Dex 4 yrs
Married in July 2014
TTC #1 since late Feb 2016
BFP #1 3/29/16 MMC: 5/5/16 BFP #2 7/6/16 SCH, D&C 8/4/16 BFP #3 12/26/16 EDD: 9/6/17 My Chart / My Diabetes/Pregnancy Blog My Type 1/TTC/Pregnancy Podcast: Juicebox Podcast Episode 118 A1Cs: 1/12/16 6.7% 5/25/16 6.0% 11/2/16 6.1% 3/22/16 5.8% 4/27/17 5.4% 6/13/17 5.3% "Sugar Fancy Tutu"
@Sugargirl1019 Wow. I have no words for how truly f**cked that is. I would be absolutely livid. From his perspective and from yours. Not lifting a finger at all to help her own child but capitalizing off of his own suffering to put herself in a better place. Does not sound like much of a mom to me....
@Sugargirl1019 Wow. I have no words for how truly f**cked that is. I would be absolutely livid. From his perspective and from yours. Not lifting a finger at all to help her own child but capitalizing off of his own suffering to put herself in a better place. Does not sound like much of a mom to me....
It gives me a sigh of relief to know I'm not a bitter bitch
Me: 27 years old DH: 27 years old Type 1 Diabetes since 2001, MTHFR hetero A1298T Dogs: Raider 4 yrs, Dex 4 yrs
Married in July 2014
TTC #1 since late Feb 2016
BFP #1 3/29/16 MMC: 5/5/16 BFP #2 7/6/16 SCH, D&C 8/4/16 BFP #3 12/26/16 EDD: 9/6/17 My Chart / My Diabetes/Pregnancy Blog My Type 1/TTC/Pregnancy Podcast: Juicebox Podcast Episode 118 A1Cs: 1/12/16 6.7% 5/25/16 6.0% 11/2/16 6.1% 3/22/16 5.8% 4/27/17 5.4% 6/13/17 5.3% "Sugar Fancy Tutu"
@Sugargirl1019 Wow. I have no words for how truly f**cked that is. I would be absolutely livid. From his perspective and from yours. Not lifting a finger at all to help her own child but capitalizing off of his own suffering to put herself in a better place. Does not sound like much of a mom to me....
@Sugargirl1019 you are not a bitter bitch at all! The audacity some parents have....seriously, that is bologna that they would think that move is ok. And they wonder why your relationship with them might be on the rocky side or the 'eh, I'll hold y'all at a distance side'.
FFFC: I threw my own baby shower. My sister and SIL ended up helping through almost all of it. I didn't know someone else was suppose to throw it and no one offered. It was coed and all family with a few friends. I wasn't expecting gifts and didn't do a registry. My sister asked what she could get me and got a playpen. That was my biggest gift besides diapers and outfits. I don't get why people care so much about showers and why they are labeled greedy and selfish. I always thought in laws and parents got the bigger ticket items. I have never gotten a baby registry sent to me before and I have been to many many many showers.
@kaylaakousa I've only ever been to like three or four baby showers my whole life. The only one I could honestly say I knew who "hosted/threw" it would be the one I co-hosted for one of my best friends. At the end of the day people are there for either you, the baby, or the free food (j.k). I also think I've only gotten a registry notification for two of those showers. Most people buy off the registry anyways.
@Sugargirl1019 I second that you are not a bitter bitch. That's really fucked up. My parents didn't pay for my tuition, but they helped me with all sorts of things including co-signing on loans. I can't imagine not helping and using the credits. She was very selfish. You have every right to be bitter.
@Sugargirl1019 wow! The audacity some people have. I don't know if I would be on speaking terms if my inlaws did that and I'd still be bitter! They didn't suppport my DH at all through college or grad school but never would they think to claim the taxes.
@Ae_Lovely321 Ours was definitely about the food, we also had beer there too. Also, I think peeps are delicious and now all I have been thinking about is roasting them over a campfire.
Re: FFFC 4/14
Also, I think society needs seriously reflect on this whole idea that people "need" a bachelor's degree before they can qualify for a job. With the insanely skyrocketing costs of higher education in the US, college is becoming increasingly unattainable for so many families. We either need to change our hiring/employment practices or change higher education (or probably both, actually). We'll see what ends up changing first...
ETA: @labby18 articulated things in detail that really explains my perspective. Thanks!
Married 2013
Kiddo #1: Sept 2015
BFP: 1/19, EDD: 9/30
"I'm having fruit salad for dinner. Well, it's mostly just grapes, actually. Ok all grapes. Fermented grapes. Fine, I'm having wine for dinner."
Dh and I are following what @lap018 is doing almost exactly, it's what his parents were able to do for him and we see the value in it . I had to pay my own way through. I can tell you I don't think it was that great of a learning experience to be extra broke and struggling to make your food stretch between semesters, among other things. I had to make some pretty tough choices to be able to afford to stay in school - I'm not putting my kids through that. Part of the reason we're stopping at 2 kids is because we want to ensure we can properly afford to do these things for them.
We're keeping our fingers crossed that I'm still working at the university that I'm at right now when they are college age and they want to go there- it's free for me, my spouse and all dependants
June Siggy Challenge: Workout
FFFC: My almost 2 year old sleeps in our bed most of the time and at 4 AM we awake to him crying. Apparently he tried to get out of bed or was sleeping/dreaming and somehow was getting off the bed. There is a gap between our mattress and footboard and the poor guy was stuck standing between them. I couldn't help but laugh while feeling bad at the same time. We got him back in bed and he snuggled right up but I'm still confused how that happened.
Me & DH: 31 | Married: 5.4.13 | TTC: April 2016 | BFP: 1.8.17 | EDD: 9.13.17
I do have $50K in grad school loans I'm a little bitter about because they told my younger brother they would pay for his masters degree, but not mine. They told me that they know I'm ok and I can pay for it. I'm paying a lot each month to knock that out so we can buy a new car and renovate.
Anyways, we plan on paying what we can for each child and helping them out when we can. My parents did that with me growing up and I greatly appreciated it.
My job requires a masters degree. There isn't any way around it, but if they want to go to trade school, I'm all for it!
I want to provide more for my children than my parents did for me but I also want them to be ambitious and work hard. Because I think that what I went through shaped me to be the incredibly hard working ambitious person I am today.
After we have the baby and get better settled financially I plan on saving for both of them to have a safety net to get them through at least a portion of their college. And of course I will never have my children struggle in their adulthood. So if they need help affording food, etc. we will most definitely be there for them.
I pay for college loans still, as does my DH. We both worked during college, too. But we also had the support we needed from our parents, and I was certainly capable of appreciating it without working to the point of exhaustion all the time. I think kids can go to college, have financial support, and still recognize that it's not an easy thing to finance. My older brother went to college, screwed around, and my parents pulled him out of school after his second semester. He didn't appreciate what he had, and threw it out the window with both hands. He's 35, and just finally finished his BS a year or two ago, as he had to work and take classes at the same time for years.
I see nothing wrong with helping my kids get an education. And if they decide they don't want to go to college or trade school, well, the great part is that the funds can be transferred to another family member's name instead. They won't be wasted.
DS2: EDD- 09.08.17
Me: 35 | DH: 38
Met: 2007
Married: 2013
BFP #1: 06/21/16 MMC: 08/04/16
BFP #2: 01/08/17 DD: 09/23/17
BFP #3: 06/10/20 EDD: 02/11/2021
I went to university out of town and my parents paid tuition but I paid everything else from part-time work and summer jobs. They still bought me groceries when they visited and stuff like that but I had to learn balance and budgeting without getting over stressed. DH went to college but lived at home. His parents helped but he also worked part-time and had an inheritance to live from when he did his internship. We both finished debt free. I then went to law school which I paid for but lived with DH (back before we were married). I had student loans but repaid them really quickly with DH's help. We want to make sure DS knows that he has to work and figure out how to be a responsible person but not to the point of being worn thin.
I don't want my kids to go through anything like that. While I doubt we will ever be able to pay for their whole college tuition, I do plan to help them with what we can afford. I won't require them to go to college. I will be happy to help them with a trade school too if that's what they would prefer.
The portfolio we use is just one that our financial advisor at the college said we should use at this young of an age. It's a pretty "risky" portfolio, but we'll change it to moderate as we get older.
FFFC: I am still incredibly bitter towards the in laws. They did not help dh at all during college. He bought his own vehicle, paid for his own living etc. The last year of his schooling, year 6 because he had to work so much to make enough money and couldn't take as many clases, he actually moved in with me (we were engaged). He focused on school and worked a small part time time on weekends at night. I supported him. I provided him food, shelter, I cosigned a private loan for him since he went through all the public loans. All so he could graduate. We were married later that year after graduation, and filed taxes the next year. I expected us to be able to take all the education credits for him.
Nope. Guess what. His mother claimed they supported him and paid his student loans and she took all the education credits. I was PISSED and still haven't let it go.. obviously...
Type 1 Diabetes since 2001, MTHFR hetero A1298T
Dogs: Raider 4 yrs, Dex 4 yrs
BFP #2 7/6/16 SCH, D&C 8/4/16
BFP #3 12/26/16 EDD: 9/6/17
My Chart / My Diabetes/Pregnancy Blog
My Type 1/TTC/Pregnancy Podcast:
Juicebox Podcast Episode 118
A1Cs:
1/12/16 6.7%
5/25/16 6.0%
11/2/16 6.1%
3/22/16 5.8%
4/27/17 5.4%
6/13/17 5.3%
"Sugar Fancy Tutu"
Type 1 Diabetes since 2001, MTHFR hetero A1298T
Dogs: Raider 4 yrs, Dex 4 yrs
BFP #2 7/6/16 SCH, D&C 8/4/16
BFP #3 12/26/16 EDD: 9/6/17
My Chart / My Diabetes/Pregnancy Blog
My Type 1/TTC/Pregnancy Podcast:
Juicebox Podcast Episode 118
A1Cs:
1/12/16 6.7%
5/25/16 6.0%
11/2/16 6.1%
3/22/16 5.8%
4/27/17 5.4%
6/13/17 5.3%
"Sugar Fancy Tutu"
DS #1 [S-5]
3 Step Daughters [A-8] [E-6] [I-4]
Baby #2 09/10/2017
It's a BOY!
Babywearer&EBF
have. I don't know if I would be on speaking terms if my inlaws did that and I'd still be bitter! They didn't suppport my DH at all through college or grad school but never would they think to claim the taxes.
Also, I think peeps are delicious and now all I have been thinking about is roasting them over a campfire.
DS #1 [S-5]
3 Step Daughters [A-8] [E-6] [I-4]
Baby #2 09/10/2017
It's a BOY!
Babywearer&EBF