Thoughts on two middle names?

joforyoga · March 2017

I am wondering what you guys think of giving baby two middle names? Inwouldnt have normally wanted to do this. If we have a girl we want to names her Hunter Caroline. But we have our son munchkin father in laws name as a middle and I feel like my mom expects us to use her name as a middle name if it's a girl. My Grandmas name is my middle name also so it's like a running tradition. My moms name is Evelyn which is lovely but I love love love Caroline too. Is Hunter Caroline Evelyn too much?

lm45678 · March 2017

I know this isn't what you asked, but are you dead set on Hunter for a girl?

Caroline Evelyn is a beautiful name.

MamaWren919 · March 2017

I think 2 middle names is complicated for no reason. Filling out paperwork will always be difficult, different documents will say different things, etc. Hunter Caroline Evelyn is also a mouthful and doesn't flow well to be honest. Use Hunter Caroline or Hunter Evelyn. Or I love Caroline as a first name.

joforyoga · March 2017

That's our number two option. The names are just so different so it's a big decision. My husband loves Hunter and I feel like I'm kinda over the old fashioned feminine names for firsts just because all the top names for the past 5 years etc are all old super feminine names.

bbiutmcph · March 2017

There are so many non old fashioned feminine names that would be better options than Hunter.

Also although any name can be turned into something cruel, Hunter/ Hunt so easily turn into another really bad slang that it's something to consider and not something I would want for my daughter.

As for two middle names it's definitely NMS and everyone I know that has it says it's a giant pain. For me it always gives off a very southern or religious vibe

joforyoga · March 2017

Thanks! I've literally been obsessing over name lists and do really love Hunter. It sounds so strong and confident to me and I found it on a list of "color" names for babies. Hunter green is my favourite color so it gives me warm feelings, kind of makes me think of the color of a forest or trees in general. Not everyone's cup of tea maybe but there are other baby names people love that I think are awful so to each there own. I appreciate all of your thoughts though, thinking we will stick to one middle name:)

Cricket99 · March 2017

I just want to chime in on the first name Hunter for a girl. I have no judgement either way, but I did teach a middle school girl named Hunter a few years ago. She hated it. She was relentlessly teased for having a "boy name". She was always saying how much she hated that her parents couldn't come up with a girls name (she was super girly, into pink, and better than me at doing makeup). Please consider what it will be like for your daughter later in life through her school years especially. Middle schoolers can be total assholes.

That being said, my vote if you go with Hunter is definitely one middle name. I really like Evelyn with it.

FakeFinn · March 2017

Regarding the two middle names: if you as the parents want her to have two middle names, then do it. However, if you're doing it, because you think your mother experts it, don't. Think about it and if you're really attached to the name and want to continue the tradition go for it. It's hard enough as parents to agree on a name, your opinions are all that should matter.

With regard to the name: I prefer Caroline and Evelyn over Hunter.

GL!

mercury94 · March 2017

I feel like 2 middle names Can be complicated, but if the names mean a lot to you, you should go for it. I just know that when I changed my name after I got married, the driver's license office didn't allow 2 middle names, so ultimately, she might have to pick one.

MyNamesTaken · March 2017

I have two middle names, both family names with meaning which is why they were chosen. It's a pain sometimes but overall not a big deal. The second one often gets dropped off documentation because there's not enough room but just make sure everything you register her in is consistent even if it doesn't show up that way on the card (ie birth certificate, passport, drivers license, health card, etc).

Hunter makes me think of guns. NMS

joforyoga · March 2017

Hunter never made me think of guns or the actual literal meaning of the word. It seems strange that the name Hunter would be such a big deal with so many unisex names and boys names being used on girls. It's not a new trend and with names such as Taylor, Blake, James, Spencer, being used on girls it didn't seem like a big deal at all. Then 2 Hunters that I have known were both girls so I guess I just associate it with girls more.

emilyalso · March 2017

I LOVE Hunter for a girl! I think it's a nod to an older generation - which I am always in favor of. I understand the idea behind wanting to use all 3 names, but the middle names will not actually get 'used' very much. While it would be a nice tribute, it's also a mouthful. (I oppose most things done just to appease non-parental parties.)

Bringmemylongswordho · March 2017

Not all trends are good. Masculine names for girls has been happening forever, just the names change. When your daughter grows up, Taylor and Blake will be trendy has beens, too common for girls, too girly for boys. It's rooted in sexism, and is always going to have people who call it out for that.

Practically though, I fear she will be called Cunter a lot in middle school/all of young adulthood if she has any semblance of a backbone/happens to be a target for bullies.

All names can be made fun of, but not all names can be easily turned into cunt.

joforyoga · March 2017

Are you saying you think the trend itself is rooted in sexism? I would argue that it is the exact opposite. Although I don't think sexism is the right word I think we're talking about gender stereotypes and defining somebody's gender by the name that they have. You don't need a masculine name to be a boy and who defines what attributes are positive in boys and girls? I don't see how the Gender neutralizing of names could be anything but positive in a society where we are looking to be more open and less stereo typical and how we define sex and gender. This is just my opinion and I may have misunderstood your point but having said that, choosing the name Hunter had nothing to do with the politics of gender at all, I just really like the name and so does my husband.

Bringmemylongswordho · March 2017

Yes, using masculine names for girls is rooted in sexism, even if you personally aren't conscious of it.

And two, masculine names becoming common for girls isn’t "neutral" Ashley is coded feminine despite being a masculine name. And even in names where usage is more evenly distributed, the names are still masculine. Masculinity is considered the default, and that's not neutral at all.

You do you. Hopefully no one calls her cunter.

nanner26 · March 2017

My dad suggested Tucker one time for a boy's name and my mind immediately went to Tucker f***er. I think any names that rhyme with swear words should be carefully thought out.

Adding that the two middle names are quite a mouthful. Have you thought about combining to make "Carolyn"? That way it could honor both?

joforyoga · March 2017

Bringmemylongswordho said:

Yes, using masculine names for girls is rooted in sexism, even if you personally aren't conscious of it.

And two, masculine names becoming common for girls isn’t "neutral" Ashley is coded feminine despite being a masculine name. And even in names where usage is more evenly distributed, the names are still masculine. Masculinity is considered the default, and that's not neutral at all.

You do you. Hopefully no one calls her cunter.

I guess my point is that while I'm sure many people will think that a masculine name is a bad thing for a girl I think that's closed minded. There is nothing wrong with some masculinity in girls or femininity in boys. These are boxes that we place children in. Anyways Inwasntmloooking for any kind of debate and It has nothing to do with my question. Thanks for your thoughts, were all free to express:)

Knottie1471010354 · March 2017

Our children have two middle names. We went that route for a couple of reasons. My husband is Eastern European so the first middle name honors one of his family members (and we use it to carry on the Name Day tradition from the country where he was born). The second middle name is English and honors one of my family members. It doesn't always fit on forms and in that case we drop the second name and try to be consistent. I also anticipated using just the two middle initials rather than the full names.

ellie111227 · March 2017

Part of the evidence that the boy names on girls trend is sexist is that it only goes one way. If you would name a girl Hunter but wouldn't name a boy Maria, that is because you have been socialized to think that it is ok (maybe even flattering!) for a girl to be mistaken for a boy but insulting for a boy to be mistaken for a girl. The only possible explanations for that is that it is better to be masculine than feminine or that being masculine is default and feminine is a deviation, either of which is sexist. Even if you personally would name a boy Maria (or some other clearly feminine-coded name) most of our society wouldn't, and that's not what the trend you are a part of is doing, so you are still a part of a sexist trend either way.

SnarkasaurusRex · March 2017

FWIW, I know two adult female Hunters, and they both hate their names. One of them was named after her father, who passed away while her mom was pregnant. She appreciates the sentiment for her name, but goes by her middle name instead. The other one legally changed her name to Heather after we finished college. Both of them were called C*nter or Hunter the C*nt at some point in their lives. Just something to consider beyond the "boy name on a girl" thing. I get that you're not a fan of frilly girl names (neither am I), but you can get a "strong" sounding name for a girl without having to borrow from the boys.

As for the two middle names thing, I wouldn't do it just because your mom expects you to. If you want to keep the tradition, keep it. If you don't, don't. I wouldn't force a second middle name in there unless you really wanted it, because it can be a pain from a paperwork perspective as others have mentioned.

ashleyandely · March 2017

ellie111227 said:

Part of the evidence that the boy names on girls trend is sexist is that it only goes one way. If you would name a girl Hunter but wouldn't name a boy Maria, that is because you have been socialized to think that it is ok (maybe even flattering!) for a girl to be mistaken for a boy but insulting for a boy to be mistaken for a girl. The only possible explanations for that is that it is better to be masculine than feminine or that being masculine is default and feminine is a deviation, either of which is sexist. Even if you personally would name a boy Maria (or some other clearly feminine-coded name) most of our society wouldn't, and that's not what the trend you are a part of is doing, so you are still a part of a sexist trend either way.

Couldn't have said it better myself.

joforyoga · March 2017

Again ladies thanks for your input on the idea of two middle names.

4N6s · March 2017

I would drop hunter.
I don't like two middle names - it just makes the name so much longer and it never flows well.

leighry · March 2017

@Knottie1447173547 I like Hunter for a girl. It's strong but underused. I myself went back and forth about two middle names for our son and decided on one. When it came down to it, one of the names was just more important and I didn't want the other one always left out, so it seemed unnecessary. I noticed someone had mentioned possibly combining the two middle names you're thinking of to honor both and still just use one name. The ex was Hunter Carolyn (which I think is beautiful). If not, Hunter Evelyn flows better to me.

holli0801 · March 2017

Caroline Evelyn is lovely, and they just don't match hunter in the slightest

joforyoga · March 2017

hollieileen said:

Caroline Evelyn is lovely, and they just don't match hunter in the slightest

Do you have helpful suggestions for a different middle name? Most other boards and people I've talked too always recommend a fairly girly middle name to go with more boyish androgynous first names.

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