Fiance and I got into a fight this morning, we both said really nasty things to each other. He sent a text as I was walking into work and said he was sorry. My FFFC is that I completely plan on ignoring him all day and just not responding because I'm that petty today.
I convinced my husband I needed an hour to get the house ready and finish packing for our weekend trip so he is taking our toddler with him to our tax appointment.
Im done packing and all I have to do is toss the food in the fridge. I really only need like 90 seconds but now I'm alone and the house is quiet.
The irrational side of me is majorly side-eyeing Kellogg's for switching to all natural ingredients. The Froot Loops don't taste nearly as good anymore--bring me back the fake crap! I mean, I'm still going to eat them (because sugar) but that doesn't mean I have to be happy about it...
Yesterday some lady saw me out with my 2 girls. She said "oh, you've got your hands full, and you're expecting another one? I bet you're really hoping it's a boy!" Since she used two of my least favorite stranger comments AND decided it was ok to assume I'm pregnant and not just fat, I said "oh, we really are excited about this little one no matter what it is!!" Even though we totally already know he's a boy. Because I just didn't want random stranger lady to be thrilled for me because my baby has a penis. And it was awesome because she was all *plastered fake smile* *totally condescending tone* "well of course you are, sweetie!"
@BeachMommy2B Exactly! I try to do natural stuff when I can, but let's face it...I know what I'm getting myself into when I crack open a box of crappy, sugary cereal.
My FFFC: If you use the phrase "I'm not a feminist, but....." I'll judge you. Seriously, when you qualify a statement like that, what do you think a "feminist" is? I mean, you can be a "feminist" without supporting the same causes as every other "feminist." Do you think the "feminists" in the 1900s supported all of the same things we fight for today? You can be outspoken or quiet. You can donate to PP or not. There's not a checklist or application. If you disagree with any sort of injustice towards women, you don't have to qualify your statement to let people know whether or not you are a feminist. In fact, you don't even have to be whatever you think a "feminist" is to call out jerkish or unfair behavior. I guess I'm just sick of everyone taking the "us vs. them" argument to every single issue. Some things are just a human issue.
Mine is: if I say I'm fat it's because that's how I'm feeling. I'm not body shaming, I'm not digging for compliments, I'm just working my way through this pregnancy and feel larger than I have before. Just let me say how I feel!
I still drink a cup or two of half calf coffee in the morning and a 44 Oz of diet coke throughout the day. Every day.
I literally do this exact thing but with real Coke. Husband gets annoyed but whatever I love it and I am taking care of 2 boys under 4 so I'm drinking the caffeine.
I know this has been used before, but... I'm sick of everyone asking how I'm feeling. I know they're being polite or w/e, but it gets old getting asked a million times a day.
MIL has three perfectly capable adults (myself, SIL who lives with her, and DH) any of who could've drove her 15min to the airport today but I volunteered to pop up at 5:30am to take her cuz I knew I could grab a latte on the way home and sit and drink it in silence before DD woke up.
@nda_roxybabe with my 1st pregnancy the same lady I worked with asked me every.single.day how I was feeling... I swear she didn't miss a day asking me how I felt. It absolutely drove me nuts!!!!
My FFFC is it's after 12:30 I have not showered or brushed my teeth yet, oh and DD and I are still rocking our pjs! I've declared today a lazy day.
I hear ya on the "how are you feeling" question @nda_roxybabe and @MrsFox2008! And then when you answer honestly by saying "I'm exhausted" I don't need you to constantly remind me that I will continue to be exhausted once baby is here. Yes, I know I will be, I don't need to be reminded! You asked how I'm feeling right now, not later!
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
I still drink a cup or two of half calf coffee in the morning and a 44 Oz of diet coke throughout the day. Every day.
I literally do this exact thing but with real Coke. Husband gets annoyed but whatever I love it and I am taking care of 2 boys under 4 so I'm drinking the caffeine.
Same here! I secretly drink pop when I am at work a couple times a week. I think my DH knows that I do this because I don't care to hear his comments. Diet coke is just too tasty.....
Haha! H gives me a hard time about caffeine too. I'm like dude, it's less than 1/2 of what I'm "allowed" in a day and I don't do it every day, I think we're good. He just wants to make sure we're healthy I guess.
I definitely drink a cup of full caff coffee or a soda a few times a week and I'm not sorry at all.
Totally agree @NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot. It seems odd in this day and age to even say that you are not a feminist. I think people are teying to avoid labeling themselves as something extreme, but fail to understand that if you think women are equal, you are a feminist. There's nothing extreme about that.
My FFFC: I'm terrible at knowing my left and my right. I usually look to see the 'L' on my left hand. Obviously, I am great with directions.
Umm, add me to the list that needs to confess on the caffeine consumption...I drink an iced dirty chai every morning (so, chai with a shot of espresso). And on the weekends, I drink an iced coffee in the morning and sometimes get a second latte later in the day. DH used to give me a hard time about it, so I asked my doctor to talk him off the cliff one time when he came to my appointment. She basically said "lay off her--she's working full time, growing a child, and managing a toddler plus you. she's very rarely exceeding the normal recommended limits and as long as she it's shotgunning the drink, it releases slowly into the system and is no cause for concern". Since then, he hasn't said a word. While not brewing a human, I tend to drink 2-3 times that much coffee, so...it's still a concession.
My FFFC stems from yesterday's discussion about CFA (which I didn't participate in because I was busy working)...I have been on a multi-year ban from eating Chick Fil A because I have some fundamental disagreements with their moral stances on things...but since being pregnant, I've eaten there TWICE because I've found myself in food courts where that's the only thing that sounded good and I still LOVE their chicken nuggets. Sigh.
My FFFC is that I'm dicking around on the Inter-webs instead of working. And I mean, literally, for hours...
EDIT TO ADD: Lately my little tiny preschooler son has been saying "I'm just dicking around with you, mama" and I correct him with "please say 'fooling around' instead honey" and now I know where he gets it! Oops.
@MoshiMoshi7 haha yesss. I constantly say in my head, "I write with my right." When driving and making turns. That was my biggest fear when taking my driving test, that I would turn the wrong direction
I had an assignment due at midnight last night that I forgot to do. I remembered at 9:30 last night but I was already in bed. And I don't think I'm going to do it tonight - the weather is too pretty. I'll work on it tomorrow.
I am really appreciating this thread today. Everyone is making me feel so much less guilt about the amount of caffeine I drink. I keep it under the recommendation usually, but have at a minimum 2 cokes a day. Last pregnancy I did far better, but with a toddler there is no way I can do this without a little caffeine.
@bacorrea I most definitely turned the wrong way twice during my first driving test. I failed for so many reasons. I suck so bad at left and right.
@Louise_Belcher i drink coffee like every day. Combining half-caf and full caf and tea and doing double espresso shots on days i don't do other types of caffeine.
@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot@MoshiMoshi7 i consider myself an egalitarian and not a pure feminist though because i think men should also be able to pursue traditionally female occupations and activities without being judged for it. That being said, i think everyone should be able to do what they really want to do (equal opportunities, i guess, based purely on skill and expertise?). This is why the concept of 'we need more women in STEM' is slightly confusing to me: we should definitely encourage girls to pick sciences if they feel like it and they should be able to pursue a career with the same level of acceptance as men but if a girl wants to be a SAHM (and not purely because society conditioned her to want that) i'm all for it and wouldn't judge.
ETA: i judge people for spelling. Seriously judge. In two languages.
@thistlenweeds By definition, doesn't egalitarian encompass feminism because it's the belief that all people are equal and deserve equal rights? Whereas, you could be a racists feminist, believing in gender equality but not racial equality, and thus you wouldn't be an egalitarian. Someone please correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't see how you could be an egalitarian without being a feminist.
@starphish18 to me the difference is that feminism concentrates on female rights alone but egalitarianism is broader and is really about everyone's right. So yes, it is more encompassing. But i feel that sometimes the more radical adepts of feminism can be a bit extreme and not necessarily as keen about preserving the rights of other groups.
@thistlenweeds I would (respectfully) argue that your position doesn't make you "not a feminist." I agree with everything you've said (with a few caveats). Both men and women should be able to do whatever they want. Girls should be given the same opportunities to develop expertise in the areas of their choosing. Speaking from the tech field, we do need more women in STEM. I don't think we need to force women there who don't want to be there, but we should encourage STEM opportunities in the classroom for boys and girls. Having witnessed my 3yo DD say, "that's a boy {insert item, clothing, activity here}" more times than I can handle, I think that might mean we have to encourage the younger girls to embrace some "boy" activities or correct those statements by explaining that boys and girls can do everything. And I also agree that anyone who wants to SAH is absolutely allowed to. However, SAH is also a job and those that do should get equal say in the family's finances (see July FFFC for more on that....) I don't think wanting men to be able to pursue traditionally female occupations makes you "not a feminist" nor do I think egalitarianism and feminism are necessarily mutually exclusive.
@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot oh, absolutely. My sister wants to be a physicist (she's 12), i'm all for it. And yes, i agree, that SAH is a job and shouldn't be disregarded as 'doing nothing at home all day'. So totally on board with your points here. As i was trying to clarify in my previous comment, i don't necessarily want to associate with more extreme edges of feminism that could potentially disregard the value of the rights of other groups. That's really the only reason i worded it the way i originally did.
@thistlenweeds I see your point. If that were the case, I assume you wouldn't be one to say "I'm not a feminist, but ____". Instead, you'd just say what you thought.
I know this has been used before, but... I'm sick of everyone asking how I'm feeling. I know they're being polite or w/e, but it gets old getting asked a million times a day.
I have been a horrible wife in the sex department lately and was totally planning on giving MH some love tonight. He has been having a tough week and I thought this would cheer him up. Well, he just texted me that he is having another rough day and he just wants to go to the gym and blow off steam. My FFFC is that I'm not going to tell him about wanting sexy time tonight so that I can just go to sleep when he goes to the gym.
Re: FFFC 2/17
Im done packing and all I have to do is toss the food in the fridge. I really only need like 90 seconds but now I'm alone and the house is quiet.
May '17 labor memes
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
Mine is: if I say I'm fat it's because that's how I'm feeling. I'm not body shaming, I'm not digging for compliments, I'm just working my way through this pregnancy and feel larger than I have before. Just let me say how I feel!
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
My FFFC is it's after 12:30 I have not showered or brushed my teeth yet, oh and DD and I are still rocking our pjs! I've declared today a lazy day.
#1 DD Aug 2014 @39weeks via CS
#2 Due May 2,2017 hopeful VBAC
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
Me:31 DH:32 Married 11/06/10
DD: Born 8/23/13 (clomid+ovidrel+IUI)
BFP 9/9/16 EDD 5/19/17
Same here! I secretly drink pop when I am at work a couple times a week. I think my DH knows that I do this because I don't care to hear his comments. Diet coke is just too tasty.....
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
Totally agree @NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot. It seems odd in this day and age to even say that you are not a feminist. I think people are teying to avoid labeling themselves as something extreme, but fail to understand that if you think women are equal, you are a feminist. There's nothing extreme about that.
My FFFC: I'm terrible at knowing my left and my right. I usually look to see the 'L' on my left hand. Obviously, I am great with directions.
My FFFC stems from yesterday's discussion about CFA (which I didn't participate in because I was busy working)...I have been on a multi-year ban from eating Chick Fil A because I have some fundamental disagreements with their moral stances on things...but since being pregnant, I've eaten there TWICE because I've found myself in food courts where that's the only thing that sounded good and I still LOVE their chicken nuggets. Sigh.
EDIT TO ADD: Lately my little tiny preschooler son has been saying "I'm just dicking around with you, mama" and I correct him with "please say 'fooling around' instead honey" and now I know where he gets it! Oops.
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
@bacorrea I most definitely turned the wrong way twice during my first driving test. I failed for so many reasons. I suck so bad at left and right.
DS2 5/17
#3 Due 9/20
@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot @MoshiMoshi7 i consider myself an egalitarian and not a pure feminist though because i think men should also be able to pursue traditionally female occupations and activities without being judged for it. That being said, i think everyone should be able to do what they really want to do (equal opportunities, i guess, based purely on skill and expertise?). This is why the concept of 'we need more women in STEM' is slightly confusing to me: we should definitely encourage girls to pick sciences if they feel like it and they should be able to pursue a career with the same level of acceptance as men but if a girl wants to be a SAHM (and not purely because society conditioned her to want that) i'm all for it and wouldn't judge.
ETA: i judge people for spelling. Seriously judge. In two languages.
My FFFC? Pepsi rules, Coke is the worst.
I would (respectfully) argue that your position doesn't make you "not a feminist." I agree with everything you've said (with a few caveats). Both men and women should be able to do whatever they want. Girls should be given the same opportunities to develop expertise in the areas of their choosing. Speaking from the tech field, we do need more women in STEM. I don't think we need to force women there who don't want to be there, but we should encourage STEM opportunities in the classroom for boys and girls. Having witnessed my 3yo DD say, "that's a boy {insert item, clothing, activity here}" more times than I can handle, I think that might mean we have to encourage the younger girls to embrace some "boy" activities or correct those statements by explaining that boys and girls can do everything. And I also agree that anyone who wants to SAH is absolutely allowed to. However, SAH is also a job and those that do should get equal say in the family's finances (see July FFFC for more on that....) I don't think wanting men to be able to pursue traditionally female occupations makes you "not a feminist" nor do I think egalitarianism and feminism are necessarily mutually exclusive.
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
DS2 5/17
#3 Due 9/20
I guess I don't have a FFFC of my own.