Thanks ladies! Yes I'm pretty sure there was a pregnancy related issue but also a money issue. They gave me a lot of excuses that were complete BS, but I can file for unemployment. The thing that sucks is that was our only income. DH is a full time college student, he will graduate in May thank God. But I still have to do something before then. He could get a pt job but then we'd never see him with his school hours. I had a hard morning, but I've been working on my resume and trying to stay positive.
Thanks ladies! Yes I'm pretty sure there was a pregnancy related issue but also a money issue. They gave me a lot of excuses that were complete BS, but I can file for unemployment. The thing that sucks is that was our only income. DH is a full time college student, he will graduate in May thank God. But I still have to do something before then. He could get a pt job but then we'd never see him with his school hours. I had a hard morning, but I've been working on my resume and trying to stay positive.
Hey girl, if you need help with your resume, just send me a note. I do them professionally as part of my biz training, but I'd be happy to review yours free of charge. I'm sure something will come along at just the right time too, so hang in there.
@mrsla3 I hope something good comes up for you soon! I know how stressful it was when my husband lost his job a few months ago, making it just my salary to cover for us and somehow all the new baby expenses. I can only imagine how stressed you must feel! I'll be praying that you all are able to work something out.
TTC history in spoiler
Me: 31 Him: 37 Married: Oct 2015 Baby G born June 2017 TTC#2: July 2018 BFP #2: 2/6/19 MC 3/14/19 BFP#3 from IUI #2: 6/30/20 EDD 3/9/21
@MrsLa3 I'm so sorry about your job. I was the sole provider in our house until I got pregnant, and we had to switch over to my husband being the sole provider (I was stupid sick and couldn't really do my old job). Then he was getting pushed out of his position because the computer fucked up, then he only got a temporary job and it took almost a month to get another one. Thankfully that job has been going great, but we're still trying to stabilize and start saving after so much uncertainty and lack of income. I really hope you can find something soon, and wish you the best of luck in that search.
Hubby and Me Friends since 2008 Started dating: July 1st, 2013 Engaged: July 1st, 2014 Married: July 1st, 2016 R born: July 8th, 2017 N born: June 30th, 2019 Baby #3 Due: July 7th, 2022 (maybe I only ovulate in October XD)
hey @MrsLa3 I'm so sorry about your job!! I, too, am a big fan of / believer in "all will turn out for the best", but right now that's just awful... I hope you continue to stay positive and find something quickly!
I would love it if my kid would not kick me in the cervix and give me lightning crotch. Because that's been (not) fun today.
You know a report is bad when both of your clients (myself and my counterpart at the base) rip it to shreds.
Married: 10/13/2013
TTC #1: Mirena removed 5/26/2015; DH - normal SA, me - diagnosed with PCOS 8/4/2016 - on Metformin; BFP - 10/29/2016!!!, EDD - 7/8/2017; DD born 6/29/2017
DH and I are going to a funeral today to pay respects to his godmother's father. MIL texts me this morning to tell me that I need to ask my mother if it's okay for me to attend a funeral while pregnant.
I don't know why, but that just made me start crying. I just feel like I've lost autonomy over my person and that I've ceded my identity as an individual. Everyone has something to say about what I should or should not do or that I need permission before I can do things. I just keep thinking about that article about that lawmaker who said that once women are pregnant, they are just hosts. That's what I felt like at that moment.
@Twinkiedoll I'm not sure if it's the same thing but because of my husbands Navajo culture, I am not allowed to go to funerals when pregnant. There is a teaching that says pregnant women should not go to funerals or cemeteries because there are bad spirits that could affect the baby. I obviously don't follow that rule because I go visit my mom every week or so at the cemetery but my IL's definitely do not like it so I kind of get how you feel!
Married: 05/26/2012
DS Born Happy and Healthy via C-section: 10/04/2013
Natural M/C: 07/08/2014
DD Born Happy and Healthy via Emergency C-section: 06/30/2015
DH and I are going to a funeral today to pay respects to his godmother's father. MIL texts me this morning to tell me that I need to ask my mother if it's okay for me to attend a funeral while pregnant.
I don't know why, but that just made me start crying. I just feel like I've lost autonomy over my person and that I've ceded my identity as an individual. Everyone has something to say about what I should or should not do or that I need permission before I can do things. I just keep thinking about that article about that lawmaker who said that once women are pregnant, they are just hosts. That's what I felt like at that moment.
Why would she think being pregnant has anything to do with a funeral? And why would she say to ask you mom if it's ok?? Pretty sure you're an adult and can make your own decisions. Sorry you are upset about it, but I would probably just take it with a grain of salt. People are stupid.
@cssme13 I'm sure there is a Chinese superstition about it, which is why MIL told me to check with my mom. But I think being there for DH and his godparents today trumps a superstition that I would not otherwise be aware of until today.
And honestly, I just think it just triggered general feelings of feeling like I am losing autonomy and identity. Between strangers wanted to touch your stomach, the guilt trip from MIL about the baby shower, and reading what politicians say about pregnant women, I think the funeral thing was just the triggering event of a meltdown waiting to happen....
@twinkiedoll I would say if you personally don't believe/practice whatever culture/religion the superstition exists in, I wouldn't worry about it. In the end, it's your body, your baby, and your decision.
@TwinkiedollI definitely get it. My IL's tried to tell me I couldn't attend the funeral of my husbands grandfather because I was pregnant when he passed but never actually told me why. It was annoying.
I get where you are coming from, just because we are pregnant doesn't mean we suddenly cease to exist, we are still people too! This should be a happy time not a time where people feel the need to micromanage our lives and criticize everything we do. I hope things start to get better for you!
Married: 05/26/2012
DS Born Happy and Healthy via C-section: 10/04/2013
Natural M/C: 07/08/2014
DD Born Happy and Healthy via Emergency C-section: 06/30/2015
My mom told me people tried to tell her she couldn't go to my dad's grandmother's funeral when she was pregnant with me. Apparently there's a superstition about pregnant ladies and dead people. Needless to say, my mom went and I'm (for the most part...lol) perfectly fine and healthy.
I totally get your feelings @Twinkiedoll. I've been feeling like an incubator ever since my first pregnancy. Especially with my in laws. I feel like I'm just a catalyst to grandkids. It's super frustrating and hurtful. I'm so sorry you're feeling that way!
@Twinkiedoll I'm sorry you have to hear such things from close ones. I know how you feel. If you don't believe this then don't stress yourself over it. However I fully understand why it's annoying when people say things when your in such a delicate/ important time of your life, there's plenty of restrictions already and we already try to keep ourselves so safe from everything that even limiting something like that is upsetting and nerve wrecking.
The other day I was enjoying this eggplant dish at a get together and someone goes to me "btw that person had a miscarriage the next day because of eggplant, so be careful!" I had eaten eggplant before without issue but just hearing that made me cry a little on my way back home!
So, I went to my OB yesterday, and had previously accepted that labor is not going to be an option for me. But I had some demands which go as follows;
-Is a clear drape a possibility? She said she had ordered one and would use it for me. Yay!
-delayed cord clamping? Yes, she can do that.
-immediate skin to skin? She said because in a c section, all the fluid is not squeezed out as it is in a vaginal birth, baby would need to be suctioned, and the equipment is attached to the warming table, but she could have the baby brought to me and have it done beside me.
-can I hold baby on the way to recovery? She said of course. I do not want diluidid, too strong. Or any IV meds. she said she does not give IV meds unless requested, and that she usually has the anesthesiologist inject two nerves on either side of the tummy to negate pain for 18 hours, then Percocet or Norco if needed.
-I want epidural, not spinal. And yes, I realize that I may feel hands in there. she said yes, she could do that, but the spinal takes longer to wear off than an epidural does. So possibly more pain etc. But I am okay with that. I want baby transferred, unswaddled to my chest as soon as possible under a warmed blanket, don't care if I am naked during the procedure. Assistance with breastfeeding, if necessary, since I will not be able to sit up quite yet. She was supportive.
Overall, very productive conversation. previous experience left with a little ptsd, and I cried for months over it. Seems petty compared to other mothers experiences, but I feel that this can be a healing experience, and I am now looking forward to it.
@CarsonsMommy so glad you feel more comfortable about your repeat section. My repeat section with my twins was very similar (no clear sheet for me) and a completely different experience then my emergency section with DS.
I feel bad I haven't been on much this week but I'm starting a 4-day weekend now! I have to go to the dentist and run a million errands today but I'll be checking in.
@Twinkiedoll There's a long standing superstition that if a pregnant woman goes to a funeral the deceased will steal the unborn baby's soul. Maybe that's what she is thinking of. I do understand how annoying it is when people tell you what to do. This however is probably something that has been drilled into her for many years and probably didn't mean any harm by it.
@Twinkiedoll People have lots of superstitions, and whatnot, so I understand that she might worry about one of those. I personally do not believe them, but I did refrain from going to the funeral of a family who lost their son while I was pregnant (it was a former student)...that was my own personal decision to not be insensitive to their loss. Regardless, what I don't understand is why you would need to ask your mom. Are you not a grown woman? Why would this be something you need your mother's permission to do?
DS is watching the Doc McStuffins episode when the parents announce that they are adopting a baby. DS (who still doesn't know about this pregnancy) jumped up all excited, "I can't WAIT until we get a baby!" When I asked him why, he said, "I LOVE babies!" We're waiting to tell him until after the anatomy scan on the 28th. Hopefully "little brother" or "little sister" will be more concrete for him that way (he's 3 1/2). After his exclamation this morning, I cannot wait to see his reaction!
@Twinkiedoll I totally get your frustration. My mom wouldn't let me walk back half a block to our house from the bank. Cause clearly something horrible was going to happen. It annoyed me too. I know she was just worried and trying to help, but it was way over kill.
Hubby and Me Friends since 2008 Started dating: July 1st, 2013 Engaged: July 1st, 2014 Married: July 1st, 2016 R born: July 8th, 2017 N born: June 30th, 2019 Baby #3 Due: July 7th, 2022 (maybe I only ovulate in October XD)
I'm super late on this but I'm so sorry @MrsLa3 I hope you find something soon that works for your family. How awesome @mrscate88 you volunteered to help. I know you don't need my validation but I love when someone just wants to help someone they don't even know. I wish I had more of an opportunity to do so myself.
AW post: we've been waiting on an order for the new Ford F-150 raptor for 7 MONTHS. And it finally came in yesterday! I have never seen so much room in a backseat and feel pretty confident we could get ANY convertible car seat to fit 3 in a row in that thing. I thought my options for a second convertible seat (easier to just have 1 in each car) were limited to the diono or clek but I feel like my world has been opened up! We only need 2 to fit for now but I'm thinking ahead. By the time we have a 3rd I may just steal this ginormous too big for tiny-little-short-me pickup truck from my husband.
ETA: I'm also no longer stuck home while my husband is using my car! Woohoo. Maybe now this rut I've been in will lift a little being I can actually get out if I feel at all cabin feverish.
BFP May 2013 - MMC at 8 weeks BFP September 2013 - MMC at 12 weeks BFP February 2014 - early loss/CP at 4.5 weeks BFP May 2014 - MMC/ complete molar pregnancy at 11 weeks BFP December 2015 - DD born 8/18/2015 BFP November 2016 - pending...
Just got a call today from my birthing center that my insurance approved to cover my birth completely! I'm in absolute shock and so happy. They changed it from apparently out of network, to in network and totally covered. I just can't believe that they did that when they didn't have to. It does benefit them since the birthing center will be so much cheaper than the hospital, but still. I'm in the US and normally you have to fight insurance tooth and nail to get anything covered. I'm just so grateful that they covered it without me even having to get on the phone.
Hubby and Me Friends since 2008 Started dating: July 1st, 2013 Engaged: July 1st, 2014 Married: July 1st, 2016 R born: July 8th, 2017 N born: June 30th, 2019 Baby #3 Due: July 7th, 2022 (maybe I only ovulate in October XD)
AW: So excited!! After a bunch of seizures last year, DH was not allowed to drive for a year!! Well, the year is up, and we went to buy him a new car today! He's so happy, and so am I!
AW: So excited!! After a bunch of seizures last year, DH was not allowed to drive for a year!! Well, the year is up, and we went to buy him a new car today! He's so happy, and so am I!
CONGRATULATIONS! I'm glad he's in the clear now My husband had a few seizures several years ago and couldn't drive for 6 months. We were so glad when that time was up!
AW: So excited!! After a bunch of seizures last year, DH was not allowed to drive for a year!! Well, the year is up, and we went to buy him a new car today! He's so happy, and so am I!
AW: So excited!! After a bunch of seizures last year, DH was not allowed to drive for a year!! Well, the year is up, and we went to buy him a new car today! He's so happy, and so am I!
@alcrimmins@chiquita928 Yeah, I'm sure there is a Chinese superstition about it. But the fact that MIL ordered me to ask my mom for permission really irked me. I'm an adult. It's one thing if I'm superstitious about it. I'm clearly not. Why do I need permission to see if someone else's superstition prevents me from doing something?
So much good news here, sorry for not quoting each and every one, but hooray for new cars, houses, improved health, insurance covering your birth plan, and anything else I missed!
More good news: Hubs was in a car accident 3 months ago and spent some time in the ICU with over $500,000 in medical bills! That's not the good news haha...At first, our insurance refused to cover it because the accident was the fault of the driver, who didn't have enough coverage to pay off our bills. All said and done, all medical bills are paid and we just owe the annual out of pocket max! Yay!
@mrscate88 I'm so glad, although it stinks that they refused at first because the other driver was at fault. Insurance policies can be such a headache.
@mrscate88 I'm so glad, although it stinks that they refused at first because the other driver was at fault. Insurance policies can be such a headache.
thank you! Yeah insurance is so necessary but so stressful. After months of fighting, we finally got it all sorted out. And for what it's worth to anyone here, Aflac is a lifesaver as well!
@alcrimmins@chiquita928 Yeah, I'm sure there is a Chinese superstition about it. But the fact that MIL ordered me to ask my mom for permission really irked me. I'm an adult. It's one thing if I'm superstitious about it. I'm clearly not. Why do I need permission to see if someone else's superstition prevents me from doing something?
That's what I'm saying...totally ridiculous! I would have been super upset, too.
Re: Weekly Randoms - Week of 2/13
Me: 26 Him: 27
Dating: 5/2011 Married: 6/2014
Mirena out/TTC: 02/2016
BFP #1: 12/01/2016
EDD: 07/24/2017
Married: Oct 2015
Baby G born June 2017
TTC#2: July 2018
BFP #2: 2/6/19 MC 3/14/19
BFP#3 from IUI #2: 6/30/20 EDD 3/9/21
Friends since 2008
Started dating: July 1st, 2013
Engaged: July 1st, 2014
Married: July 1st, 2016
R born: July 8th, 2017
N born: June 30th, 2019
Baby #3 Due: July 7th, 2022
(maybe I only ovulate in October XD)
I would love it if my kid would not kick me in the cervix and give me lightning crotch. Because that's been (not) fun today.
You know a report is bad when both of your clients (myself and my counterpart at the base) rip it to shreds.
I don't know why, but that just made me start crying. I just feel like I've lost autonomy over my person and that I've ceded my identity as an individual. Everyone has something to say about what I should or should not do or that I need permission before I can do things. I just keep thinking about that article about that lawmaker who said that once women are pregnant, they are just hosts. That's what I felt like at that moment.
Married: 05/26/2012
DS Born Happy and Healthy via C-section: 10/04/2013
Natural M/C: 07/08/2014
DD Born Happy and Healthy via Emergency C-section: 06/30/2015
BFP #4: 11/15/2016
EDD: 7/27/2017
ETA @cssme13 I didn't even think of that!
And honestly, I just think it just triggered general feelings of feeling like I am losing autonomy and identity. Between strangers wanted to touch your stomach, the guilt trip from MIL about the baby shower, and reading what politicians say about pregnant women, I think the funeral thing was just the triggering event of a meltdown waiting to happen....
I get where you are coming from, just because we are pregnant doesn't mean we suddenly cease to exist, we are still people too! This should be a happy time not a time where people feel the need to micromanage our lives and criticize everything we do. I hope things start to get better for you!
Married: 05/26/2012
DS Born Happy and Healthy via C-section: 10/04/2013
Natural M/C: 07/08/2014
DD Born Happy and Healthy via Emergency C-section: 06/30/2015
BFP #4: 11/15/2016
EDD: 7/27/2017
I totally get your feelings @Twinkiedoll. I've been feeling like an incubator ever since my first pregnancy. Especially with my in laws. I feel like I'm just a catalyst to grandkids. It's super frustrating and hurtful. I'm so sorry you're feeling that way!
The other day I was enjoying this eggplant dish at a get together and someone goes to me "btw that person had a miscarriage the next day because of eggplant, so be careful!" I had eaten eggplant before without issue but just hearing that made me cry a little on my way back home!
She said she had ordered one and would use it for me. Yay!
Yes, she can do that.
She said because in a c section, all the fluid is not squeezed out as it is in a vaginal birth, baby would need to be suctioned, and the equipment is attached to the warming table, but she could have the baby brought to me and have it done beside me.
She said of course.
I do not want diluidid, too strong. Or any IV meds.
she said she does not give IV meds unless requested, and that she usually has the anesthesiologist inject two nerves on either side of the tummy to negate pain for 18 hours, then Percocet or Norco if needed.
she said yes, she could do that, but the spinal takes longer to wear off than an epidural does. So possibly more pain etc. But I am okay with that.
I want baby transferred, unswaddled to my chest as soon as possible under a warmed blanket, don't care if I am naked during the procedure. Assistance with breastfeeding, if necessary, since I will not be able to sit up quite yet. She was supportive.
Overall, very productive conversation. previous experience left with a little ptsd, and I cried for months over it. Seems petty compared to other mothers experiences, but I feel that this can be a healing experience, and I am now looking forward to it.
@MrsLa3 I love my baby trend infant seat!!!!
Friends since 2008
Started dating: July 1st, 2013
Engaged: July 1st, 2014
Married: July 1st, 2016
R born: July 8th, 2017
N born: June 30th, 2019
Baby #3 Due: July 7th, 2022
(maybe I only ovulate in October XD)
AW post: we've been waiting on an order for the new Ford F-150 raptor for 7 MONTHS. And it finally came in yesterday! I have never seen so much room in a backseat and feel pretty confident we could get ANY convertible car seat to fit 3 in a row in that thing. I thought my options for a second convertible seat (easier to just have 1 in each car) were limited to the diono or clek but I feel like my world has been opened up! We only need 2 to fit for now but I'm thinking ahead. By the time we have a 3rd I may just steal this ginormous too big for tiny-little-short-me pickup truck from my husband.
ETA: I'm also no longer stuck home while my husband is using my car! Woohoo. Maybe now this rut I've been in will lift a little being I can actually get out if I feel at all cabin feverish.
BFP September 2013 - MMC at 12 weeks
BFP February 2014 - early loss/CP at 4.5 weeks
BFP May 2014 - MMC/ complete molar pregnancy at 11 weeks
BFP December 2015 - DD born 8/18/2015
BFP November 2016 - pending...
Friends since 2008
Started dating: July 1st, 2013
Engaged: July 1st, 2014
Married: July 1st, 2016
R born: July 8th, 2017
N born: June 30th, 2019
Baby #3 Due: July 7th, 2022
(maybe I only ovulate in October XD)
More good news: Hubs was in a car accident 3 months ago and spent some time in the ICU with over $500,000 in medical bills! That's not the good news haha...At first, our insurance refused to cover it because the accident was the fault of the driver, who didn't have enough coverage to pay off our bills. All said and done, all medical bills are paid and we just owe the annual out of pocket max! Yay!
Also, thank you guys! BIG relief!