Questions 1/29 - Page 2 — The Bump
April 2017 Moms

Questions 1/29

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Re: Questions 1/29

  • @BabyBlake042017 It's a tough call for sure. My DH works remotely and is the lead of his team that operates all over the country, and he travels about 50% of the time. His last trip is scheduled for when I am 37 weeks along (and I'm scheduled for a RCS at 39 weeks, so we're really cutting it close if she does what I want and makes her appearance before then!). I'm not super thrilled about it, but it's that he either has to travel then or 2 weeks after my RCS, so it's the better option. Like @schef070911 it's a completely different situation because it's not international travel and both sets of our parents are local to help me out if necessary. Is there someone local who can be your back-up birth partner, just in case?

    I grew up in a military family so I know how inflexible they can be! They sent my dad on a one year deployment 3 days after I was born. :unamused: My brother also got deployed to the Middle East with one week's notice! It can be super frustrating. I hope you get some more answers and that you and your DH are able to work something out. Good luck!
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    schef070911KirstinH88HGRich
  • Thanks @schef070911!! Hope all goes well with your husband out of town and that baby stays put while he is on his trip. Glad your parents are able to be there with you when he is gone! 
    schef070911HGRich
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  • @ashleym112 haha again you are coming to the rescue and making me feel better... my obsessive nature couldn't just let it sit at "something could be wrong" so they went into detail with a laundry list of potential chromosomal issues and then the doctor at Maternal Fetal Medicine ended this conversation by saying or it could just be that "you're really skinny and we're picking up a lot of minute details that could be nothing and if we weren't in America I wouldn't have even pointed any of this out at all I would've just said everything is fine and healthy looking". Then when I explained how bothered I was by everything said during the ultrasound during my next OB check up the NP I saw just seemed irritated and had zero understanding and sympathy as to why I felt upset by this. 
    HGRichashleym112
  • Ok, not really sure where to ask this, but looking for opinions! My husband was asked to go on a work trip March 14-17 (he was told he's the only guy that can do it). We're in England and the trip is to the states (not sure exactly where). It's just the 3-4 days, but I'll be 37 weeks pregnant. I feel like the chances of baby coming that early are slim (my mom had to be induced for all her pregnancies including twins at 40 weeks), but you just never know what will happen. What would you do... let him go or put your foot down? 

    That's so tough. My husband works in civil service (USFS), and he was scheduled for a 3 week training when I'm 39 weeks (April 1-20). He was able to postpone for a year. Sweet of your husband to defer to you! Is this your first babe? I think at 37 weeks, I would see if the trip could be postponed, but if not would be okay letting him go, given that it's only 3-4 days, but that's a super personal and tough call.
    smoochie041719KirstinH88HGRich
  • @BabyBlake042017 I think I'd say okay in your situation, provided he could get on the next plane home (paid for by work...) if necessary. 
    DD #1 April 2017
    expecting mid-late May 2020

    KirstinH88HappyAnjel
  • Thanks @ALSlevin, it is our first baby! That's the thing, @catem07 there would be no coming home early paid for by work. Once he goes he's committed. But it seems early enough that it is probably ok. I just know making decisions like that is how you jinx yourself haha. 
    McFarKaneHGRichschef070911KirstinH88
  • Has anyone dealt with switching insurance during pregnancy? Since DH was laid off, I had to switch our insurance to being covered under my company. I selected the same insurance provider for ease. But I'm supposed to take my glucose test before my next appt on 2/7. I called member services and they say that my coverage as ended as of 2/1/17. I'm assuming the transfer of insurance through my company hasn't magically happened in the 2-3 days since I submitted paperwork. 

    I guess my question is whether or not my insurance coverage through my company will be backdated to 2/1/17 and if it would be safe to go take the glucose test and have my appt as usual?  
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
  • @KirstinH88 I have not had to deal with this, but I am pretty sure that your new policy would be retroactive. I would contact them to be certain, but I am fairly sure that is how it works. Good luck!
    KirstinH88
  • @KirstinH88 that's tricky.. I would call and ask I would assume you would be retroactive from the date of the switch but I honestly would just be guessing!
    Abbygirl 5/2012
    Baby Boy due 04/07/17
    KirstinH88
  • Well...my friend who has the same insurance says that they have an "I believe you" policy. Where they have you sign a paper stating you do in fact have coverage and they will still do the labs and appts, but if it turns out later that you lied, then you will be billed. She said she's used it before and she knows another person that has used it as well. So I'm going in for my glucose test this weekend and hopefully they don't give me any shit!
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
    HGRichschef070911
  • Basically, they gave me the glucose test because it was already ordered and they said that if I receive a bill, then send it in to member services.
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
    HappyAnjelashleym112
  •  Are there other stm+ that wanted alone time with both children and dh before family comes in to meet baby? Mil & fil will bring Ds to hospital after I give birth but I don't want them in the room right away. I want Doug to get to meet his new baby sister without anybody else trying to get in the way. Plus I just want my little family to get alone time! So my question is does anyone think its rude of me to make them wait since they will bring Ds to the hospital? 
    smoochie041719
  • Can your DH go get your son? 

    DD1 born 5/24/10.

    Missed M/C at 14 wks Feb 2012.

    DD2 born 5/14/13.

    Missed M/C at 9 wks July 2015.

    Expecting someone new 4/17/17.
    Dannylion24cafedisco
  • Our hospital is an hour away from grandparents house so they plan on coming to the hospital as soon as I start pushing anyways unless its late\middle of the night. So they will already be there or be coming as soon as my son wakes up in the morning anyways.
  • HappyAnjelHappyAnjel member
    edited February 2017
    I don't think it matters.. it's one time I feel like you are allowed to be selfish and have things how you want.. I wouldn't make them wait around hours.. but maybe spend a few moments alone with you baby and DH before having DH bring DS in to meet his sister for a bit before inviting them in..

    if you're really worried about feelings maybe have him make up a little lie like you're getting cleaned up or working on latching and he will let them know in a few minutes when you're not exposed that they can come in too.
    Abbygirl 5/2012
    Baby Boy due 04/07/17
    HGRichKirstinH88cafedisco
  • We didn't have anyone cometo the hospital for a few hours after DS was born. It did help that he was born around 5am on a weekday so most family was either sleeping or getting ready for work. We did tell everyone prior to his birth that we would Ben having time with Jim before inviting anyone else to meet him.

    This time around my parents will most likely be with DS. We haven't discussed it with them yet, but I fully intend on having them wait to bring him to the hospital until DH and I have had a little time with the new baby and asking them to wait a bit in the waiting room so that DS can meet his little brother before they come in. I don't feel like it's too much to ask.
    KirstinH88cafediscoLaceyRae25ashleym112
  • @LaceyRae25 do you have the sort of relationship that you can just tell them that? Or maybe ask them to bring DS, and give you some time as a new family while they go get a cup of coffee or meal for you or them? I don't think you are being unreasonable at all, btw. 

    PS my DS' name is Douglas as well. I never "meet" anyone that have named their child that!
    Me: 37, DH: 35 :: TCC since 2/11 SA: Perfect! CD3  HSG = Blocked Right Tube
    April- Femara 2.5mg + Trigger + IUI = BFN   May- Femara 5mg = CX - No Response on Left = BFN
    June- Femara 7.5mg + Trigger + IUI = BFN  August- Lap & Hysteroscopy = Blocked & Partially Blocked Tubes
    September- Femara 5mg = CX - No Response on Left = BFN  October- 100mg Clomid + Trigger + TI = BFN
    IVF # 1: Stims 11/30 ER 12/12/12! (10R, 10M, 8F, 2T, 6 F) :: Beta #1- 176  c/p @ 4w4d
    FET #1 February 26th :: Lost 4 to Thaw, Transferred 2 = BFFN
    IVF # 2 Stims 5/10 ER 5/21 (15R, 13M, 13F, 2T, 7F- 6d3 & 1d5) :: Beta # 1- 15 c/p @ 4w
    FET #2 Cancelled, Right Tube Developed a Hydro  8/28 Hydro & Scar Tissue Removed  Cleared for FET
    FET #2.2 Scheduled for September 20th
    2 Thawed, 2 Transferred! Beta #1- 96, Beta #2 906! :: EDD June 10th
    2015- 2 failed FET. We are done
    SURPRISE! BFP 8/8/16   EDD 4/1/17

     
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    KirstinH88LaceyRae25
  • With my second we had a short time with just me my DH and DD. She was young so it wasn't that long. This time around we also plan to have just us and our kids for a little bit before letting others in. My family already knows this. They will be the ones who keep my kids while I'm at the hospital and they don't live nearby so I don't plan on making them wait to long but they understand I want some time alone at first.
    KirstinH88cafediscoLaceyRae25
  • edited February 2017
    @LaceyRae25 I agree that this is one of those times you get to be selfish and have thing go how you want! I would probably tell them my plan in advance so they aren't taken by surprise or end up with hurt feelings. I feel like it's always best to manage expectations in advance, and I think allowing DS a short time to meet his new sibling first and spend a few minutes as a family of four is perfectly acceptable! I agree that I wouldn't make them wait all day or anything, but enough time to grab a coffee, some breakfast etc. I would probably send DH to get DS from the lobby so he can help the grandparents find a place to wait and he can bring DS back to your room to meet baby. 
    cafediscoLaceyRae25
  • It depends what time of day the baby is born. My mom was with us in the delivery room for DD because I wanted both her and DH there. DD was born at 6 am, so after maybe an hour or so, once I was finished delivering the after birth and got cleaned up, my dad came. I think MIL and FIL came later in the afternoon (they live an hour away). With DS, my mom and dad were watching DD. It was was just DH and I for the delivery. DS was born at 8:50pm, so we didn't have visitors until the next day. It was February, and DD was only 20 months old, so I don't believe she was allowed to visit (flu season and what not). I am not even sure if DS and DD can visit this time, and, honestly, while I love them and will want to see them, I don't know they need to see me in the hospital. Plus, they are balls of germs, so I think I'd rather save the introductions for at home. I personally like visitors to a point, because I get pretty bored in the hospital...

    BabyFruit Ticker
    DD: 6/20/11
    DS: 2/23/13
    EDD: 4/15/17 

    cafediscoKirstinH88LaceyRae25
  • @SnarkasaurusRex we may have the same mother!

    Last time mine found someone she knew to "show her where my room was" BC if she had to call to be let in she knew I would have said no.. I told her this time I'll call her when I've had the baby and she said she will be in the waiting room if I like it or not... The more pushy she is the longer she waits..
    Abbygirl 5/2012
    Baby Boy due 04/07/17
    KirstinH88LaceyRae25smoochie041719
  • @twistsandturnsto2  That's so nice to know! Its my grandpas name so I've never meet anybody that named their child that either!
    @SnarkasaurusRex My mil and your mother could be twins! With ds she refused to wait after I gave birth and announced his arrival on fb before I even got the chance to call my family. 
    Her boundaries are non exsistant so talking to her about what I want is pointless unfortunately. I may have to ask a nurse to get my son from the waiting room so she doesn't make dh feel guilty for making her wait. She's cried her way out of many situations! I don't plan on making them wait long as most of you suggested. But I do plan on enjoying holding both my babies for the first time!

    Thank you for all the opinions\advice everyone!! 
    smoochie041719
  • @KirstinH88
    I work in employee benefits, and your new coverage will be retro-active to the day your old coverage ended. You will not have a lapse in coverage. If you don't have the new info yet to give your OB, you can send it to them as soon as you have it and they can retro bill. I switched insurances too as of 1/1/17, and so far I have yet to have any issues. 
    HGRichschef070911KirstinH88LittleChick2
  • @KirstinH88 We also switched insurance at the beginning of the year, and they just billed everything retroactively. I had my insurance cards before the switch happened, but not my prescription card, so those have been billed retroactively until I get those cards (and seriously, how is it February and I still don't have them?!).
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    schef070911KirstinH88
  • Thank you all for the insurance answers!! The less headaches the better!  :D
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
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