April 2017 Moms

Randoms 1/23

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Re: Randoms 1/23

  • I'm so excited.  I've been researching deals and scouring FB yard sale sites looking for a good price on a Halo bassinest.  My husband found one of the $300 models for sale on craigslist for $125 in the town next to where I work... and they agreed to sell it for $100!!   It's almost brand new, I'm just going to replace the mattress and get some sheets.

    It was a shit show picking it up though... I had gone to Target in the morning to start stocking up on diapers not expecting my husband to make a deal that quickly.  My little mazda3 had 3 boxes of diapers, 5 bags of clothes I'm donating to a coworker that wasn't in yesterday, 3 bags from Target, 2 car seats... and a giant bassinest haha.  The guy I bought it from had to take the legs off to stick the base in my car.  Thank goodness he was cool about it!
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  • @mrsstuessy I know nothing of Des Moines, but good luck to your DH! Fx that he gets the job!
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
  • A March mom gave birth right outside the hospital  :#

    https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12700379/norah-is-here#latest
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
  • @KirstinH88 whoa!!!! I just read that. Way to go Mom!!!
  • @mrsstuessy Des Moines is a fun town!  I've never lived there but I've had many friends who have and they all liked it.  Fingers crossed for you all!

    Whoa on that birth story!  I'm confused about why they would be sweeping her membranes now if she wasn't due until March though?  I'm assuming there is more to the story!  
    Me: 31
    DH: 36
    Married 5 years
    DD born 8/30/13
    #2 expected 4/25/17
  • That. Is. Wild. 
    DD #1: April 2017
    DD #2: May 2020
    Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022

  • @cafedisco @KirstinH88 Thanks ladies! I will let you know how it goes.

    Any amazing interview tips anyone? It is a 90 minute in person interview. Probably the only one he will have with them before they make a definite decision. It is the most intense he has ever had to deal with. 

    And I am also confused as to why they were stripping her membranes if she wasn't due for over a month. And wow... crazy. My very first actual doula client had something really similar happen, except she just got upstairs before he came out. I actually missed that birth because I got there about 5 minutes after they did. 

    Me: 28 year old SAHM/Birth Doula
    DH: 30 year old pneumatic electrical engineer 
    Married: October 8, 2011
    DD1: September 24, 2013
    BFP: June 25, 2016 and MC: July 3, 2016
    DD2: April 16, 2017
    BFP: November 30, 2018 EDD: August 14, 2019
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • @cafedisco and @mrsstuessy I was wondering the exact same thing re sweeping membranes...
    Me: 31 DH: 34
    DD1 born 3.2014
    DD2 born 4.2017
  • I was also confused on why they were stripping her membranes and her baby was still 7 lbs, so I'm wondering if there is more to that story. 

    @mrsstuessy I've sat in on quite a few interviews and I personally think personality and vibes is more important than work knowledge. I'm assuming if he's an architect then most people going for this position will have similar qualifications. I like to see how someone would meld with the work group. And obviously first impressions are key! Smile, talk enough to answer the question (one sentence is not enough!), show your (his) personality!
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
  • @mrsstuessy Des Moines is a neat place! I have tons of family there and went to college about 45 minutes away! Do you or your DH enjoy a good, greasy burger? Check out Zombie Burger downtown! Ankeny is a nice area north of the city that is really developing. Johnston and Waukee are also really strong school districts on the edge of the city. There are some neat parks and sculptures downtown near the capitol and Court Avenue. If you are a cupcake fan there you should check out Scratch or Creme cupcakes. (Can you tell I just love food? I make DH stop at Zombie Burger anytime we pass through pretty much)  
    Babysizer Cravings Pregnancy Tracker
  • A March mom gave birth right outside the hospital  :#

    https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12700379/norah-is-here#latest
    Whoa!!  :o
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • @mrsstuessy ZB is the place to go then! It's very popular! My favorite burger has cheese curds, ranch, and chicken fried bacon on it. So greasy, so good. And cheese fries. And they have amazing shakes! I hope the interview goes well! We are looking at moving back to that area, possibly this spring if DH gets a job!
    Babysizer Cravings Pregnancy Tracker
  • Glad she and baby are doing well, but its not adding up fully for me. I also think that sounds risky to try to stay home until your water breaks, because only a small percent of women have their water break before active labor, which sounds like what happened to her. Not trying to pass judgement at all, just find the story interesting. 
  • I'm pretty sure she was a fairly regular poster in March. I lurk over there sometimes and recognize the name. I definitely wouldn't stay home until my water breaks either, but maybe she was a FTM and didn't know. (?!?!) My water had to be broken at 9-10 cm (right before I pushed). Heads up ladies, your water will not always break on its own!
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
  • So I've had this app since I found out I was pregnant I didn't actually realize that there was somewhere on here to talk to everyone like this and then once I did it wasn't letting me post anything for a little or I just had/have no idea what I was/at doing. I'm blaming pregnancy brain on my lack of intelligence.
  • @mcfarkane I believe when you first create a new account, they freeze you from posting anything for 3 days. Anyway, WELCOME!!!
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
  • Thanks! I'm not sure if this is the appropriate place to ask but is there anyone on here with stepchildren that are a lot older than their kids? I have an almost 2yr old daughter, a son on the way and stepsons that are 14 and 11. I was wondering if anyone had tips on ways of making the household feel like one unit. It often feels so divided here due to age and parenting differences. 
  • @McFarKane I have stepsons. Not much of an age gap though. My oldest is 9.5 and the younger one is 6. DS is 4.5. I've been with their dad since the stepsons were 4 and 4 months old, so its been quite awhile and the family unit is pretty well established. My biggest recommendation to stepparents is to make sure that their spouse is on their side. Not as in they are choosing you over their own kids, but that they have your back. That they set boundaries with their kids that you are both comfortable with and that their kids are expected to respect you. Again, I think a lot of these depends on how old the kids were when you and your H got together and since mine were relatively young, it was a fairly easy thing to establish. I am basically a second mother to my steps and I love them as if they were my own. I don't even refer to them as stepkids IRL (just makes it easier on here when we are talking about pregnancies, bio kids, etc.). Do you have your stepkids help out with the household in anyway, chores, watching your bio daughter, playing with her, etc. I think it would go along way to incorporate them into the activities of the house when they are with you. We save as much "fun" activities for when we have my steps (but this could depend on what your custody agreement is) so that we can do them as a family. 
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
  • @KirstinH88 the way I phrased that did seem kind of cold. I'm sorry I was struggling with wording for it. I've been with their father since they were 3 and 6. They do help out around the house but they kind of hit that not so fun and quite often moody age the last year or so where they kind of just like keeping to themselves. They play with their sister but it never lasts long.  My husband is also traveling a lot with work lately (it started when my daughter was about 6months old) and when he isn't around they stay with their mom so we haven't had them as much. Rules/lifestyles are so different between that houses that even though my husband and I are on the same page I think it's a struggle for the boys to adjust. 
  • @McFarKane I was definitely going to add that they are in that pre-teen/teen stage of life where everyone sucks. hahaha! So that may be more of the issue than anything else. And I can definitely relate to the rules/lifestyle being way different at their moms than it is with us. I haven't gone into a ton of detail about the baby mama, but she is quite a piece of work!  ;) Hopefully things will get better for you. It's definitely hard being a step parent, but just keep loving them. Is there any chance that your H will be home more often soon, or is it just the line of work that he is in? 
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
  • @KirstinH88 It for sure is hard! I thought I had it all figured out for a while until I had my daughter and now it seems there are new challenges i wasn't expecting to pop up. No chance of him slowing down with travel for at least another two years, maybe more.
  • I'm not a stepparent but I have two half brother's who are much older and an adopted brother.  My parents treated us all equally and we never used step, half or adopted to describe our relationships. They were & are all equally my brothers. I agree with @KirstinH88 that respect is important .. my brother's always respected my dad and he has always treated them equally and as his own.  I feel like as long as you make them feel like their place is the same as your bio kids your family unit will naturally mesh well.
    Abbygirl 5/2012
    Baby Boy due 04/07/17
  • @HappyAnjel I agree, we don't refer to them as half siblings they're brothers and sister. I feel like we all have good relationships with each other in the house. Everyone is treated equally I think the age difference is the struggle sometimes. Trying to find family activities that everyone enjoys doing is when it feels difficult and divided all the time. 
  • @McFarKane I think that's going to come with the territory of the age gap. Sometimes my 9 year old doesn't want to do what the younger two are doing. He thinks he's above it. But he gets dragged along because we are family. Do you guys do activities that are geared towards them being older and then someone can watch your daughter if it's really not 2 year old appropriate? Or if your daughter goes to bed earlier, make it a point to watch a movie with them or do an activity with them that they would enjoy? Again, I know that's excluding the 2 year old, but that age gap is a lot.
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
  • @KirstinH88 We try to take advantage of nap time and the early bedtime on the weekends when the boys are here so we'll use that time to do the things they're really into. I guess that's what makes me feel somewhat guilty though it seems like someone is always excluded. But I guess you're right and it does just come with the territory. The only time where it seems like we have genuine quality time all 5 of us is when we sit down and eat dinner together. Food always seems to help everyone bond better haha. 
  • @McFarKane Family dinners are perfect! I'm pretty adamant about having family dinners too because I think it's important for us all to be together in one place at one time. We talk about our day and just are present with each other. I'm sure you are feeling more guilt about a situation that isn't even that bad. As long as all the kids are loved and getting individualized attention, I'm sure you guys are doing great. We also make a point to have 1 on 1 dates with each of the kids. Even if it's doing something small and simple. The kids absolutely LOVE it and talk about what they want to do on their next date.
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
  • @KirstinH88 I think you're 100% right. I think I may be projecting my feelings onto this situation. I always wish it could be more stable and less chaotic for the boys with all the switching back and forth between houses. Talking to you has definitely made me feel a little calmer about it so thank you for the help. Also I just said the one on one date thing to my husband last month! I think the boys really miss him lately and it would probably help them feel more connected to him. It sounds like your boys are lucky to have you! Thanks again! 
  • @McFarKane FWIW I think you're probably doing fine, and the fact that you are worried enough about their feelings to ask seems like you're off to a great start.  And @KirstinH88 is totally a kick ass mom to all her boys!
    Abbygirl 5/2012
    Baby Boy due 04/07/17
  •  <3<3<3<3  

    You guys are sweet. I try my hardest to be a great mom because that's where I place most of my self identity. It's the most important aspect of my life. But I'm no saint either.
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
  • October 17 is open 
  • @Taylor72 how is that possible?!?!?  :#:#:#
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
  • @KirstinH88 I have no idea, like I said....I'm pretty sure I just did my introduction last week lol 
  • @mrsstuessy I say go for it! As long as the company your H is interviewing with is not at the hotel, you will never see anyone there again! I think a nice relaxing float is just want you need. It may bring some much needed relief to your back and joints as well.

    Being a floating preggers.... one of the things I miss most about being pregnant in the summer. 
  • @mrsstuessy Go for it! HAHA! If you feel comfortable in a two piece then more power to you. I personally would probably just wear some lounge/workout shorts and an oversized t-shirt. But that's because I'm body self-conscious. 
    Me: 29 DH: 33
    Married: 5/30/2013
    DSS #1: 5/25/2007
    DSS #2: 1/22/2011
    DS #3: 7/8/2012
    BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
    DS #4: 4/21/17
  • @mrsstuessy as long as your comfortable and your belly is happy, I agree - go for it! 
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