MIL commented that now that we are having number 2 we can be all done having kids... we have told her numerous times we want three children and would be open to having a fourth...
with my first pregnancy a customers exact words were "no wonder you look like shit, you're pregnant"... as he points to my growing belly...
Some of these are just down right awful. I'm sorry ladies!
"Was this planned or a surprise?" This one really bothered me because it is none of anyone's business and it was always asked right when we would announce the pregnancy. If I'm happy, you can be happy too! Just say Congratulations.
We have also received some comments about being team green and not sharing names until the baby is born, but usually after the initial reaction (and after realizing we are not going to change our minds) people are generally excited by this. Other than that nothing too bad.
Reading all these I'm so thankful I only got shit from that one person....and that she's no longer in my life.
I'll never understand all the comments about the sex of the baby. Like it's SO awful to WANT all boys, all girls...or whatever. I would have been THRILLED if we were having another boy. And I'm sure then I would have gotten...."are you going to try for a girl?" But instead I get..."how perfect, 1 of each." No...another boy would have been perfect too.
DS born via c-section 8/1/2015 DD due May 2017 (RCS)
@LuckyAng Whatt?! She is obviously so unhappy with her own life that she was set on ruining your happiest moment. I'm GLAD you're not friends with her and hope she has since reevaluated herself & her life.
I don't think weight gain/loss is ever an appropriate topic to discuss, ESPECIALLY when someone is pregnant.
I have heard the "its not about you anymore, its about the baby now"
While that may be true, that doesn't mean I plan on giving up on my dreams or life goals! I plan to pursue them and twice as hard for me & my little family. My MIL also said "say goodbye to traveling the world", I shut her cruel thoughts down so fast. I told her that it would be harder, but that nothing is impossible and I REFUSE to give up.
We've been getting the "you do know how this happens, right?" Comments. It's our third kid, not exactly the duggars over here! My (usually not inappropriate at all) husband is super inappropriate and awkward in response to those questions, and it's really embarrassing. But then I kind of wish I had the guts to respond similarly when I'm by myself!
I hate the "it's not about you, it's about the baby."
Of COURSE my life revolves around my child. But I also work, and do hobbies and try to maintain some sort of life. Not a great one at the moment, but it'll come back.
For me, I feel like my life started for real when I had my son. Like, ok...this is what life is about.
DS born via c-section 8/1/2015 DD due May 2017 (RCS)
My only annoying comments so far have been about my diet. My sisters worry about my protein, because I don't eat meat. I've been a vegetarian for almost 5 years. I'm healthier than either of them by far. I may not eat meat, but I eat home cooked meals with plenty of iron and protein. My little sister, who eats so much processed food doesn't need to worry about my diet.
Most people don't know yet still and no stupid comments from those who do know.
BUT, I have some very stupid things said from someone (and kind of some people, but one person was the worst) who do not know I'm pregnant.
One neighbor at a party in October, when seeing me drinking water: "Are you pregnant?" Me: "I'm on antibiotics" (I was, actually.) Neighbor: "But are you pregnant?" Me: "I'm on antibiotics" Neighbor: "Are you pregnant?" Me: "No" (I realized I had to lie, finally, because she would NOT stop otherwise)
At that same party another person kind of asked the same question, but was willing to be shut down when I said, "I'm actually on antibiotics."
This month I was at another party with the same neighbors. The same one asked again if I was pregnant, because I was drinking some non-alcoholic thing. Actually I think I mixed prosecco with a sparkling water. She still asked, even as I drank it in front of her! (FFFC, I guess? I drank a little? I ended up dumping most of it out.) She kept asking, repeatedly. She also badgered another woman. At the end of the party the other woman and I admitted to each other that we are pregnant (the nosy neighbor might be right but she is still so annoying about it!)
FWIW, there was yet another party that happened between these that she and I were at (our neighborhood has tons of them, as well as tons of kids, hence people thinking everyone is pregnant) and at that party I just pretended to be drinking the whole time. Brought drinks to my lips, switched drinks with DH when people weren't looking, etc. But I think she was too drunk at that party to really notice what I was doing. Or maybe she was convinced I wasn't pregnant then but I am now. ONE person at that party said something once (like, "you've had that drink a while...is there a reason you're not drinking it?") but was subtle in her question and dropped it quickly when we shut her down.
I don't mind the nosy neighbor speculating and talking about it with her friends / the rest of the neighbors behind my back (she is very close friends with a group of them). But it's really bad to badger the suspected person. What if I had been pregnant and then had a loss? What if I was trying for a really long time or doing fertility treatments? None of this applies to me -- mainly just DH wants to tell people late and we don't want anyone who could accidentally tell our kids to know before our kids do (neighbors being the worst for this), but I do wonder about how bad this could have been if those other things applied to me.
FWIW I do like this nosy neighbor most of the time. But I figured this was a good spot to submit "most annoying comment."
dude, whats with people carrying what you're drinking? Last year I'd go to dinner with my boss and associate monthly and she would always check to see if I was drinking and therefor not pregnant. There were a few times I did not feel like drinking, but either ordered a drink anyway (she wouldn't believe me if I said no) or asked thew waiter to make it non alc.
People are the worst. I haven't gotten anything too bad yet since being pregnant. Just an occasional "oh yeah, I can see a tiny bump now, how cute". Bleck. But, after I got married, I did get a lot of badgering from my uncles about when we were going to have kids. They're the joking, poke-fun type of uncles and meant no harm, but that's definitely not something to ask people. What if you're having difficulty? What if you had a loss? What if you don't want kids? People really just need to butt out of other people's choices when it comes to children.
When we announced our last pregnancy to the in laws my sil responds "well I'm not stupid." This time it was "I knew it." Bitch, that's not how you pronounce congratulations!
Haha @softsoprano ...she reminds me of my "friend" I complained about in this thread.
I forgot to mention when I told this friend I was pregnant....she gave me a high five and then changed the topic. As we were standing in the future baby room.....as I was giving her a tour of our new home.
It especially started the side eyeing because she was the ONLY person (besides DF) that knew about my loss 2 months prior.
Thanks for the super supportive high five friend.
DS born via c-section 8/1/2015 DD due May 2017 (RCS)
Most people don't know yet still and no stupid comments from those who do know.
BUT, I have some very stupid things said from someone (and kind of some people, but one person was the worst) who do not know I'm pregnant.
One neighbor at a party in October, when seeing me drinking water: "Are you pregnant?" Me: "I'm on antibiotics" (I was, actually.) Neighbor: "But are you pregnant?" Me: "I'm on antibiotics" Neighbor: "Are you pregnant?" Me: "No" (I realized I had to lie, finally, because she would NOT stop otherwise)
At that same party another person kind of asked the same question, but was willing to be shut down when I said, "I'm actually on antibiotics."
This month I was at another party with the same neighbors. The same one asked again if I was pregnant, because I was drinking some non-alcoholic thing. Actually I think I mixed prosecco with a sparkling water. She still asked, even as I drank it in front of her! (FFFC, I guess? I drank a little? I ended up dumping most of it out.) She kept asking, repeatedly. She also badgered another woman. At the end of the party the other woman and I admitted to each other that we are pregnant (the nosy neighbor might be right but she is still so annoying about it!)
FWIW, there was yet another party that happened between these that she and I were at (our neighborhood has tons of them, as well as tons of kids, hence people thinking everyone is pregnant) and at that party I just pretended to be drinking the whole time. Brought drinks to my lips, switched drinks with DH when people weren't looking, etc. But I think she was too drunk at that party to really notice what I was doing. Or maybe she was convinced I wasn't pregnant then but I am now. ONE person at that party said something once (like, "you've had that drink a while...is there a reason you're not drinking it?") but was subtle in her question and dropped it quickly when we shut her down.
I don't mind the nosy neighbor speculating and talking about it with her friends / the rest of the neighbors behind my back (she is very close friends with a group of them). But it's really bad to badger the suspected person. What if I had been pregnant and then had a loss? What if I was trying for a really long time or doing fertility treatments? None of this applies to me -- mainly just DH wants to tell people late and we don't want anyone who could accidentally tell our kids to know before our kids do (neighbors being the worst for this), but I do wonder about how bad this could have been if those other things applied to me.
FWIW I do like this nosy neighbor most of the time. But I figured this was a good spot to submit "most annoying comment."
I can't believe this. I was remarking to DH lately about how refreshing the second pregnancy has been because at this point most of my friends have had other friends get pregnant and they niw understand that when you notice someone not drinking, you leave it alone. The first time around I got some questions when I wasn't drinking but this time people noticed but no one said anything. It seems so obvious that if a woman seems like she might be pregnant but she hasn't told you she's pregnant there is a reason! Either she isn't, or she is and doesn't want you to know. Leave it alone!
The other day I was absent-mindedly rubbing my stomach because I have scar tissue in my belly button and it's been hurting. A customer asked me if I'm pregnant. I acknowledged that yes, I am. She asked how far along, I told her 17 weeks. Her eyes got really wide and she said "oh honey, you're gonna be a HOUSE!" Um....thank you??
WTF?!?!?
For real. I was floored. My stomach isn't even that big yet. Or maybe I'm in severe denial. Idk.
Most people don't know yet still and no stupid comments from those who do know.
BUT, I have some very stupid things said from someone (and kind of some people, but one person was the worst) who do not know I'm pregnant.
One neighbor at a party in October, when seeing me drinking water: "Are you pregnant?" Me: "I'm on antibiotics" (I was, actually.) Neighbor: "But are you pregnant?" Me: "I'm on antibiotics" Neighbor: "Are you pregnant?" Me: "No" (I realized I had to lie, finally, because she would NOT stop otherwise)
At that same party another person kind of asked the same question, but was willing to be shut down when I said, "I'm actually on antibiotics."
This month I was at another party with the same neighbors. The same one asked again if I was pregnant, because I was drinking some non-alcoholic thing. Actually I think I mixed prosecco with a sparkling water. She still asked, even as I drank it in front of her! (FFFC, I guess? I drank a little? I ended up dumping most of it out.) She kept asking, repeatedly. She also badgered another woman. At the end of the party the other woman and I admitted to each other that we are pregnant (the nosy neighbor might be right but she is still so annoying about it!)
FWIW, there was yet another party that happened between these that she and I were at (our neighborhood has tons of them, as well as tons of kids, hence people thinking everyone is pregnant) and at that party I just pretended to be drinking the whole time. Brought drinks to my lips, switched drinks with DH when people weren't looking, etc. But I think she was too drunk at that party to really notice what I was doing. Or maybe she was convinced I wasn't pregnant then but I am now. ONE person at that party said something once (like, "you've had that drink a while...is there a reason you're not drinking it?") but was subtle in her question and dropped it quickly when we shut her down.
I don't mind the nosy neighbor speculating and talking about it with her friends / the rest of the neighbors behind my back (she is very close friends with a group of them). But it's really bad to badger the suspected person. What if I had been pregnant and then had a loss? What if I was trying for a really long time or doing fertility treatments? None of this applies to me -- mainly just DH wants to tell people late and we don't want anyone who could accidentally tell our kids to know before our kids do (neighbors being the worst for this), but I do wonder about how bad this could have been if those other things applied to me.
FWIW I do like this nosy neighbor most of the time. But I figured this was a good spot to submit "most annoying comment."
I can't believe this. I was remarking to DH lately about how refreshing the second pregnancy has been because at this point most of my friends have had other friends get pregnant and they niw understand that when you notice someone not drinking, you leave it alone. The first time around I got some questions when I wasn't drinking but this time people noticed but no one said anything. It seems so obvious that if a woman seems like she might be pregnant but she hasn't told you she's pregnant there is a reason! Either she isn't, or she is and doesn't want you to know. Leave it alone!
I get shit from some of DF's friends (haven't seen them in a long time though) when I simply don't want to drink. Like there MUST be a reason why I'm not consuming a wine or beer or vodka soda.....maybe I just don't feel like drinking?!?!?!?!!?
Not drinking does not = pregnant!
DS born via c-section 8/1/2015 DD due May 2017 (RCS)
I'm 16 weeks today and H and I haven't made our baby news public yet. I'm holding off telling people because I know we are going to get a lot of annoying questions like "was this planned?" and other questions already mentioned. I'm not ready to deal with stupid questions (that are no one's business except H's and mine) or peoples' comments. H and I have already been asked by a lot by family members "what's going to happen to your baby when you (me, the mother) have to go back to school in the fall?". Ummm there are these wonderful people called baby sitters and magical places called childcare centers. Ever heard of them? I would love to bring my baby to school with me but that's not realistic. We'll figure out a plan for childcare just like every other family who has ever had kids has.
Most people don't know yet still and no stupid comments from those who do know.
BUT, I have some very stupid things said from someone (and kind of some people, but one person was the worst) who do not know I'm pregnant.
One neighbor at a party in October, when seeing me drinking water: "Are you pregnant?" Me: "I'm on antibiotics" (I was, actually.) Neighbor: "But are you pregnant?" Me: "I'm on antibiotics" Neighbor: "Are you pregnant?" Me: "No" (I realized I had to lie, finally, because she would NOT stop otherwise)
At that same party another person kind of asked the same question, but was willing to be shut down when I said, "I'm actually on antibiotics."
This month I was at another party with the same neighbors. The same one asked again if I was pregnant, because I was drinking some non-alcoholic thing. Actually I think I mixed prosecco with a sparkling water. She still asked, even as I drank it in front of her! (FFFC, I guess? I drank a little? I ended up dumping most of it out.) She kept asking, repeatedly. She also badgered another woman. At the end of the party the other woman and I admitted to each other that we are pregnant (the nosy neighbor might be right but she is still so annoying about it!)
FWIW, there was yet another party that happened between these that she and I were at (our neighborhood has tons of them, as well as tons of kids, hence people thinking everyone is pregnant) and at that party I just pretended to be drinking the whole time. Brought drinks to my lips, switched drinks with DH when people weren't looking, etc. But I think she was too drunk at that party to really notice what I was doing. Or maybe she was convinced I wasn't pregnant then but I am now. ONE person at that party said something once (like, "you've had that drink a while...is there a reason you're not drinking it?") but was subtle in her question and dropped it quickly when we shut her down.
I don't mind the nosy neighbor speculating and talking about it with her friends / the rest of the neighbors behind my back (she is very close friends with a group of them). But it's really bad to badger the suspected person. What if I had been pregnant and then had a loss? What if I was trying for a really long time or doing fertility treatments? None of this applies to me -- mainly just DH wants to tell people late and we don't want anyone who could accidentally tell our kids to know before our kids do (neighbors being the worst for this), but I do wonder about how bad this could have been if those other things applied to me.
FWIW I do like this nosy neighbor most of the time. But I figured this was a good spot to submit "most annoying comment."
I can't believe this. I was remarking to DH lately about how refreshing the second pregnancy has been because at this point most of my friends have had other friends get pregnant and they niw understand that when you notice someone not drinking, you leave it alone. The first time around I got some questions when I wasn't drinking but this time people noticed but no one said anything. It seems so obvious that if a woman seems like she might be pregnant but she hasn't told you she's pregnant there is a reason! Either she isn't, or she is and doesn't want you to know. Leave it alone!
YES. I feel bad that we gave the first of our friends to get pregnant at hard time at a wedding. We didn't know better. This neighbor has 2 kids and a ton of friends with kids. There is no excuse!
As PPs have said, there are lots of reasons besides pregnancy why someone might not drink. Before I was ready to announce to anyone besides DH and I's parents and close friends/family DH's parents decided to tell everyone at SIL's wedding (thankfully very small) that I was pregnant and that's why I'm not drinking which was unnecessary and then to make things worse DH's bio mom kept offering me drugs and then saying "oh wait you're pregnant" like somehow I am not completely against drug use and have close friends in NA and AA who have only made my 'no thanks' a complete 'Fck no'
I was making small talk with someone at a party and she asked how long I'd been married (2 years). She then asked if I had any kids yet, and when I said no, she said "Oh, it's about time." This was before I was pregnant, and we had just had 2 losses within 6 months. She was sweet and a little older, so I let it slide. I've been upfront with others who have asked when I'm having kids: "I'd love to, but so far we've lost them." I never say it in a mean way, but they always look pretty uncomfortable.
As far as pregnancy comments go, I had one male coworker tell me that I shouldn't travel on a business trip in February because new moms shouldn't travel. He's really old fashioned and sexist. I told him the baby won't even be here yet, and that he needs to stop patronizing me.
My mother in law said "Please tell me you won't be one of those women who wears tight outfits when you're pregnant, like that woman on the Today show." I don't know who she's talking about, but I said "It's too early for me to know how I'll dress, but I'd rather wear fitted clothes than muumuus."
People aren't lying when they say everyone is full of unsolicited advice for pregnant women!
Me: 29, DH: 31 Married: October 2014 Began TTC: April 2015 BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w) BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w) BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17 BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
@kns1988 and @h&pmomma - I definitely agree! My MIL is super grossed out by pregnant women who wear shirts that are tight enough to show their protruding belly buttons. I don't wear inappropriately tight things, but I definitely wear fitted clothes- way more flattering than old fashioned pregnancy tent-like clothes! Last pregnancy, I was so excited to flaunt my belly button around her, but it never popped! Maybe this time *fingers crossed*
Fur daughter: 02/2011 Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017 *formerly kayemjay*
My mother in law said "Please tell me you won't be one of those women who wears tight outfits when you're pregnant, like that woman on the Today show." I don't know who she's talking about, but I said "It's too early for me to know how I'll dress, but I'd rather wear fitted clothes than muumuus."
Not me, though. Bring on the muumuus. XD
But seriously, mother-in-laws, go home.
Me: 35 | DH: 46 MMC: 09/13 (9 weeks) DD: Born 8/22/14 Babies #2 & 3: Due dates 6/9/17 And my other love: writing
Not necessarily about the pregnancy, but my MIL drunkenly started discussing what we planned to do for birth control after these two are born. We are young, but we wanted to have a large family and have them young so we would be out of the baby phase while we were still young and could do fun stuff with them. When we're 30 our children will all be close to five or six, and while it's fine no matter what age you decide, that is how we, personally, wanted it. Anyway, because we are young and will have three kids, she thought it was important to discuss how not to have any more and the fact that because I'm young I can't get my tubes tied yet so what would we do! It was horrifying... i blankly stared at her, in front of dh's friends and family. He jumped in and basically made it super awkward by saying he was getting snipped and to drop it!
Pregnancy is the ONLY time I do wear fitted clothes. I think pregnant bellys are so cute and shouldn't be hidden.
I used to swim laps at a pool, my BFF and I were both pregnant at the same time and we both swam our laps in speedo bikini's....and so did other pregnant women. It's actually the only time I'm confident in a bikini!
We got so many compliments from older women saying how cool it was that women now a days don't hide their bumps!
Plus I had a SUPER rockin tan by the time I had my c-section...all the nurses commented! Haha
DS born via c-section 8/1/2015 DD due May 2017 (RCS)
@squirtgun - I got a bunch of those comments at my company Christmas party last night. This is our second, and our first is 16 months old. The kids won't be that close in age. Honestly, if things had gone the way I wanted, they'd be even closer!
I've been lucky in that nobody has said anything too outlandish to me. Yet. Though my parents did tell me they think I'm having twins because I'm showing much more clearly and earlier than my teeny tiny SIL did. Had to explain to them that a)it's just the way I'm carrying, b)we've had two ultrasounds thus far-only one in there and c) I just have weak AF ab muscles okay! Lol. We do have a strong family history of twins plus I needed Clomid to get pregnant, so in their defence my chances were higher. I tend to answer questions honestly and say what's on my mind. For example when people were asking how I was feeling 24/7 I responded with a very honest "like shit, but thanks for asking". I can absolutely see myself telling strangers that telling me I'm huge is a very rude thing to say and something they should never say to anybody, let alone a pregnant lady.
This is my 4th child. My kids are 5, 3, and 6 months. Comments so far:
- So can I have this one? - I'll take it if it's another boy. - Why? - 4?! - So you're staying home yeah? No way could you afford daycare for that many! - Irish twins? - Was this planned?! No, right?
When we said we wanted a second girl, my BIL said, "The odds are against you, it's going to be another boy!" Umm it's basically 50/50 each pregnancy.
Seriously people have no filter. Joy stealing bastards.
I don't know if this is considered stupid, but I've had a lot of people make comments to me about how you can't even tell I'm pregnant. This is my first and I'm 18 weeks so I don't think it's that uncommon to not be showing so much right now. I just don't know how to respond when someone says, "Well you'd never know that you're pregnant", like my superintendent said to me the other day.
I don't know if this is considered stupid, but I've had a lot of people make comments to me about how you can't even tell I'm pregnant. This is my first and I'm 18 weeks so I don't think it's that uncommon to not be showing so much right now. I just don't know how to respond when someone says, "Well you'd never know that you're pregnant", like my superintendent said to me the other day.
I was telling someone that I was excited to spend the first 3 months with my newborn in our cabin - I've mentioned before on here that DH runs a camp and that's where we live for half the year. The place is 83 years old but it has running water, electricity, and even a window A/C unit. The guy said "that's really not good for the baby." Um... why? He wouldn't elaborate except to say "I guess I'm just overprotective." This guy has never seen the place, and I, for one, think spending the first few months of life in nature is pretty damn cool.
Me: 29, DH: 31 Married: October 2014 Began TTC: April 2015 BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w) BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w) BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17 BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
@kns1988 That's ridiculous. I have to admit, that doesn't really sound up my alley but theres ABSOLUTELY nothing wrong. How cool for your LO that he/she'll grow up spending summers that way!
I was telling someone that I was excited to spend the first 3 months with my newborn in our cabin - I've mentioned before on here that DH runs a camp and that's where we live for half the year. The place is 83 years old but it has running water, electricity, and even a window A/C unit. The guy said "that's really not good for the baby." Um... why? He wouldn't elaborate except to say "I guess I'm just overprotective." This guy has never seen the place, and I, for one, think spending the first few months of life in nature is pretty damn cool.
BUT FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS, BABIES HAVE BEEN BORN NEAR STARBUCKS AND 24 HOUR GYMS HOW WILL THE BABY GET HIS/HER VENTI NON-FAT CAPPUCCINO WITH WHIP AND THEN SWEAT IT OFF LATER
Me: 35 | DH: 46 MMC: 09/13 (9 weeks) DD: Born 8/22/14 Babies #2 & 3: Due dates 6/9/17 And my other love: writing
"When your friend said she needed boxes and boxes of diapers, what she really meant was to go buy ANOTHER newborn toy or impractical 'cute' outfit with too many buttons on it." #Fail
Literally my daughter did not wear anything but sleepers and onesies for six months, at least.
Me: 35 | DH: 46 MMC: 09/13 (9 weeks) DD: Born 8/22/14 Babies #2 & 3: Due dates 6/9/17 And my other love: writing
BUT FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS, BABIES HAVE BEEN BORN NEAR STARBUCKS AND 24 HOUR GYMS HOW WILL THE BABY GET HIS/HER VENTI NON-FAT CAPPUCCINO WITH WHIP AND THEN SWEAT IT OFF LATER
Best response. I wish I would have thought to say something like this.
Me: 29, DH: 31 Married: October 2014 Began TTC: April 2015 BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w) BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w) BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17 BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
Re: Stupid Stuff People Have Said Now You Are Pregnant
MIL commented that now that we are having number 2 we can be all done having kids... we have told her numerous times we want three children and would be open to having a fourth...
with my first pregnancy a customers exact words were "no wonder you look like shit, you're pregnant"... as he points to my growing belly...
#1 DD Aug 2014 @39weeks via CS
#2 Due May 2,2017 hopeful VBAC
"Was this planned or a surprise?" This one really bothered me because it is none of anyone's business and it was always asked right when we would announce the pregnancy. If I'm happy, you can be happy too! Just say Congratulations.
We have also received some comments about being team green and not sharing names until the baby is born, but usually after the initial reaction (and after realizing we are not going to change our minds) people are generally excited by this. Other than that nothing too bad.
I'll never understand all the comments about the sex of the baby. Like it's SO awful to WANT all boys, all girls...or whatever. I would have been THRILLED if we were having another boy. And I'm sure then I would have gotten...."are you going to try for a girl?" But instead I get..."how perfect, 1 of each." No...another boy would have been perfect too.
DD due May 2017 (RCS)
@LuckyAng Whatt?! She is obviously so unhappy with her own life that she was set on ruining your happiest moment. I'm GLAD you're not friends with her and hope she has since reevaluated herself & her life.
I don't think weight gain/loss is ever an appropriate topic to discuss, ESPECIALLY when someone is pregnant.
I have heard the "its not about you anymore, its about the baby now"
While that may be true, that doesn't mean I plan on giving up on my dreams or life goals! I plan to pursue them and twice as hard for me & my little family. My MIL also said "say goodbye to traveling the world", I shut her cruel thoughts down so fast. I told her that it would be harder, but that nothing is impossible and I REFUSE to give up.
23 y/o;
[05/06/17]
First time mommy
90% of the way there
Of COURSE my life revolves around my child. But I also work, and do hobbies and try to maintain some sort of life. Not a great one at the moment, but it'll come back.
For me, I feel like my life started for real when I had my son. Like, ok...this is what life is about.
DD due May 2017 (RCS)
https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/new-study-suggests-pregnant-woman-silently-yearns-for-your-opinion
MMC: 09/13 (9 weeks)
DD: Born 8/22/14
Babies #2 & 3: Due dates 6/9/17
And my other love: writing
BUT, I have some very stupid things said from someone (and kind of some people, but one person was the worst) who do not know I'm pregnant.
One neighbor at a party in October, when seeing me drinking water: "Are you pregnant?"
Me: "I'm on antibiotics" (I was, actually.)
Neighbor: "But are you pregnant?"
Me: "I'm on antibiotics"
Neighbor: "Are you pregnant?"
Me: "No" (I realized I had to lie, finally, because she would NOT stop otherwise)
At that same party another person kind of asked the same question, but was willing to be shut down when I said, "I'm actually on antibiotics."
This month I was at another party with the same neighbors. The same one asked again if I was pregnant, because I was drinking some non-alcoholic thing. Actually I think I mixed prosecco with a sparkling water. She still asked, even as I drank it in front of her! (FFFC, I guess? I drank a little? I ended up dumping most of it out.) She kept asking, repeatedly. She also badgered another woman. At the end of the party the other woman and I admitted to each other that we are pregnant (the nosy neighbor might be right but she is still so annoying about it!)
FWIW, there was yet another party that happened between these that she and I were at (our neighborhood has tons of them, as well as tons of kids, hence people thinking everyone is pregnant) and at that party I just pretended to be drinking the whole time. Brought drinks to my lips, switched drinks with DH when people weren't looking, etc. But I think she was too drunk at that party to really notice what I was doing. Or maybe she was convinced I wasn't pregnant then but I am now. ONE person at that party said something once (like, "you've had that drink a while...is there a reason you're not drinking it?") but was subtle in her question and dropped it quickly when we shut her down.
I don't mind the nosy neighbor speculating and talking about it with her friends / the rest of the neighbors behind my back (she is very close friends with a group of them). But it's really bad to badger the suspected person. What if I had been pregnant and then had a loss? What if I was trying for a really long time or doing fertility treatments? None of this applies to me -- mainly just DH wants to tell people late and we don't want anyone who could accidentally tell our kids to know before our kids do (neighbors being the worst for this), but I do wonder about how bad this could have been if those other things applied to me.
FWIW I do like this nosy neighbor most of the time. But I figured this was a good spot to submit "most annoying comment."
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
I forgot to mention when I told this friend I was pregnant....she gave me a high five and then changed the topic. As we were standing in the future baby room.....as I was giving her a tour of our new home.
It especially started the side eyeing because she was the ONLY person (besides DF) that knew about my loss 2 months prior.
Thanks for the super supportive high five friend.
DD due May 2017 (RCS)
I get shit from some of DF's friends (haven't seen them in a long time though) when I simply don't want to drink. Like there MUST be a reason why I'm not consuming a wine or beer or vodka soda.....maybe I just don't feel like drinking?!?!?!?!!?
Not drinking does not = pregnant!
DD due May 2017 (RCS)
As far as pregnancy comments go, I had one male coworker tell me that I shouldn't travel on a business trip in February because new moms shouldn't travel. He's really old fashioned and sexist. I told him the baby won't even be here yet, and that he needs to stop patronizing me.
My mother in law said "Please tell me you won't be one of those women who wears tight outfits when you're pregnant, like that woman on the Today show." I don't know who she's talking about, but I said "It's too early for me to know how I'll dress, but I'd rather wear fitted clothes than muumuus."
People aren't lying when they say everyone is full of unsolicited advice for pregnant women!
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017
*formerly kayemjay*
But seriously, mother-in-laws, go home.
MMC: 09/13 (9 weeks)
DD: Born 8/22/14
Babies #2 & 3: Due dates 6/9/17
And my other love: writing
I used to swim laps at a pool, my BFF and I were both pregnant at the same time and we both swam our laps in speedo bikini's....and so did other pregnant women. It's actually the only time I'm confident in a bikini!
We got so many compliments from older women saying how cool it was that women now a days don't hide their bumps!
Plus I had a SUPER rockin tan by the time I had my c-section...all the nurses commented! Haha
DD due May 2017 (RCS)
that's probably the craziest thing I've heard pregnant
Born in June, three weeks early
Married:09/14/13
Baby 2 - Due: 5/4/17
Though my parents did tell me they think I'm having twins because I'm showing much more clearly and earlier than my teeny tiny SIL did. Had to explain to them that a)it's just the way I'm carrying, b)we've had two ultrasounds thus far-only one in there and c) I just have weak AF ab muscles okay! Lol. We do have a strong family history of twins plus I needed Clomid to get pregnant, so in their defence my chances were higher.
I tend to answer questions honestly and say what's on my mind. For example when people were asking how I was feeling 24/7 I responded with a very honest "like shit, but thanks for asking". I can absolutely see myself telling strangers that telling me I'm huge is a very rude thing to say and something they should never say to anybody, let alone a pregnant lady.
Me: 26 DH: 28
TTC #1 since 06/2014
BFP #1 09/23/15. MMC discovered 11/24/2015
BFP #2 08/24/16 EDD 05/08/17
- So can I have this one?
- I'll take it if it's another boy.
- Why?
- 4?!
- So you're staying home yeah? No way could you afford daycare for that many!
- Irish twins?
- Was this planned?! No, right?
When we said we wanted a second girl, my BIL said, "The odds are against you, it's going to be another boy!" Umm it's basically 50/50 each pregnancy.
Seriously people have no filter. Joy stealing bastards.
Really?! No wonder I like animals better than most people.
DS1 7/24/15
DS2 5/7/17
23 y/o;
[05/06/17]
First time mommy
90% of the way there
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
BUT FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS, BABIES HAVE BEEN BORN NEAR STARBUCKS AND 24 HOUR GYMS HOW WILL THE BABY GET HIS/HER VENTI NON-FAT CAPPUCCINO WITH WHIP AND THEN SWEAT IT OFF LATER
MMC: 09/13 (9 weeks)
DD: Born 8/22/14
Babies #2 & 3: Due dates 6/9/17
And my other love: writing
"When your friend said she needed boxes and boxes of diapers, what she really meant was to go buy ANOTHER newborn toy or impractical 'cute' outfit with too many buttons on it." #Fail
Literally my daughter did not wear anything but sleepers and onesies for six months, at least.
MMC: 09/13 (9 weeks)
DD: Born 8/22/14
Babies #2 & 3: Due dates 6/9/17
And my other love: writing
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.