TTC After a Loss

***December TWW***

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Re: ***December TWW***

  • Can someone help me interpret my chart? This is my second cycle TTC with help of charting after a MC at 16 weeks in July and a year of TTC before that. I'm still learning (and obviously my timing with my BBT could use some work!).

    I don't really know what's going on with my chart, but it's driving me crazy. AF should have arrived on CD26/DPO 14, but I'm now on CD 29/DPO 17. I woke up on Friday morning (DPO 13) thinking for sure AF was coming, and have felt like that ever since - very minimal spotting/watery discharge, cramps, tender breasts, sad, etc. I've take so many tests (Wondfo & FREP) and they're all negative. I can't really think of an explanation for why I'm late & have BFN, except that maybe I ovulated on CD 18 and I'm now only 11 DPO? In that case, our timing sucked. But seriously, my cycles are never this long (typically 23-26 days). On the other hand, I can't imagine it's possible that I'm pregnant and it's not showing up on multiple tests at 17 DPO. That seems impossible. What do you all think? I would appreciate your help!




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  • @kidria congrats!!!!
    TW*** Child and loss mentioned
    Married 10/12
    DS 11/14
    Ectopic 2/16
    PCOS/Ovulation Dysfunction 11/16
    IUI x 3- BFN
    Laparoscopy 3/17 Endo and tubal damage
    IVF- 4/17- 40 eggs retrieved, 10 blasts, 7 pgs tested embryos
    FET- 6/17- BFP!
    Due Feb 15, 2017
  • RiverSong15RiverSong15 member
    edited December 2016
    @ejrose22 Sorry for the confusing chart. An O pattern isn't super obvious, but based on the EWCM and temps, I'm guessing CD18 is the most probable O date at this point. At 17 DPO, you should be able to turn tests positive, so you likely Od late. With the multiple patches of fertile cervical fluid though, I can't be sure. Have you tried OPKs? Are you confident in your CM determinations?
  • @RiverSong15 Thanks for your help.  I've been really confused.  I haven't tried OPKs yet, but maybe I will next cycle because clearly I need the help!  I'm not 100% confident on the CM determinations, but about 90% confident. Either way, I think you're right - I think CD 18 is the most likely for O date. It's frustrating that I was so far off!!  And that this cycle was so abnormal for me...  But thank you so much for providing another set of eyes and interpretation. I really really appreciate it.  I feel a little like I'm going crazy lately with how much I've been obsessing about this. I really wanted to get a BFP before my EDD from my miscarriage, but I'm not sure that's going to happen at this point. :( 
  • Woah @roxgibbons YAY!!! This is definitely an emotional rollercoaster! So excited for you. FX for a great repeat beta! 

    Congrats @kidria!!!

    Such good news on this board  :#
    DH - 34, Me - 32
    Married 7/13
    TTC #1 since 10/13
    BFP 2/4/15, MC twin boys at 18w3d 5/15
    IUI #1 2/25/16

  • 10DPO and another BFN this morning... for a few seconds I thought I saw a faint second line but upon closer inspection it was an evap.  Stupid FRER.  At this point I'm just hoping AF holds out for a few more days so my LP at least goes back to what it was before the MC.  I know everyone says 10DPO can be too early but since I got my last BFP at 9DPO I feel like I'm definitely out.
  • RiverSong15RiverSong15 member
    edited December 2016
    @migdala Sorry for the BFN. I'm in the same boat - 9/10DPO and snowy-white BFN. I even wasted an FRER because "what if the Wondfos aren't sensitive enough". Ugh. I hate feeling this crazy.

    10 DPO is still really early, though, and just because you implanted early last time doesn't mean you always will. Hopefully you get a BFP soon!
  • @RiverSong15 Sorry for yours too. This cycle has been cruel - I had spotting, my chart is triphasic, I've been having super vivid sex dreams (I swear I don't usually!!!), and -- TMI, sorry -- DH and I DTD last night and my cervix feels like it's high because at this point in my cycle we usually can't do doggy style.  SORRY for the TMI but I don't know how to check my cervix myself so I kind of rely on that as an indicator and DH doesn't seem to mind.  But I'm not fatigued or dizzy and my boobs don't hurt, all of which happened last time around, so that combined with the BFNs gets me down.  I should try to stay optimistic until AF shows, though.  Fx that it's just too early for us both.
  • @RiverSong15 and @migdala I am right there with both of you. Stark white wondfo at 11DPO for me today. I am just so damn frustrated. December last year is when I got pregnant and still nothing. I really hate my body for not being about to get its shit together.

    I know this is not news to anyone and we all feel the same way, but I just want to scream today. Which actually even more makes me feel out for the month because I get super moody a few days before AF. Maybe I just need to hole up under a blanket on the couch until I feel better. 
    Me: 32 DH: 36
    Married 5/08
    BFP #1: 1/27/13 DS #1 born 10/16/13
    BFP #2: 1/20/16, ectopic discovered 1/23/16
    Surgery 1/23/16 to remove ruptured tube
    TTCAL 3/16
    BFP #3: 3/24/17 EDD 12/5/17
    DS #2 born 12/11/17



  • Sorry for the BFNs, @RiverSong15 , @migdala , @Taggarab . Fx it was just too early!

    AFM, 7 DPO and I did not test this morning, so let's call that a win.  No promises for tomorrow, though, regardless of how crazy that is.  I sometimes  convince myself that I might actually be further past O than I thought so it's reasonable to test and cheap wondfos make it all the harder to resist. 
    Me: 35     DH: 37
    BFP: 1.6.16 | MC: 2.17.16
    BFP: 10.3.16 | CP: 10.11.16
    BFP: 12.14.16 | CP: 12.14.16
    BFP:  1.23.17 | EDD 10.6.17 -- DS born 10.7.17 <3
    BFP:  9.9.18 | EDD 5.23.19 -- DD born 5.24.19 <3
    BFP: 9.1.21 | MC 10.1.21
    BFP: 11.11.21 | EDD 7.24.22 

     

  • Congrats, @roxgibbons and @kidria ! If you'd like to join us over on the TTCAL Graduates board definitely "request to join". Just find the link for the group here: https://forums.thebump.com/groups
    and request to join. For some reason people haven't been able to accept our invites since the last Bump update, but @MimoCa suggested this alternative. 

  • I'm sorry for the BFNs @RiverSong15 @migdala @taggsrab but it's still so early...
     I'm 9 DPO and still haven't tested yet...trying to hold off for as long as I can. 
  • I admire your willpower @TScalei
  • @riversong15 @migdala @taggsrab sorry for the bfn :( i with the other ladies and hope it is just early 

    i am dpo 2. Let the waiting begin. 
  • Thanks everyone for your support! You are all so amazing. I'm rooting for everyone of you. 

    @RiverSong15 @Taggarab I'm sorry for the BFN's. They suck. And hiding under a blanket is a totally acceptable and respectable response to the agony that is TTCAL.
    @migdala Don't count yourself out too soon! 



  • Tested today at 10 DPO - and got a BFN. :/ Ugh!
  • So sorry @TScalei :( You can add me to the BFN club too (10 or 11 DPO). Hugs. <3
  • @riversong15 - I just hate being in the limbo of maybe Im just too early and there is still a chance phase. I feel like I never really take myself out until AF comes. Had perfect timing this month too - I hate it when you can't even use that as an excuse.
  • @kidria Yay! Congratulations!

    AFM - I just want to say thank you to everyone for your support and kind words. Having you amazing ladies to lean on has been very therapeutic. I have been doing a lot of thinking and soul searching the last few weeks and ultimately I have decided to stop TTC. My H and I have a lot of issues and having a baby is not a good idea. This has been really hard for me because I know I will never have my own child, but rushing to have a baby in a rocky relationship will not be good for baby or for us. I probably won't be back on the board again, but I want you all to know that I am still rooting for all of you and pray you get your rainbows very soon!
    **TW - Loss & Child mentioned**
    Me: 40  DH: 47
    Married: 10/2015
    DSD: 17
    BFP #1: 6/2/15, ectopic, metho 7/15
    BFP #2: 12/4/15, cp 12/7/15
    BFP #3: 8/5/16, MMC discovered 9/1, Misoprostol 9/19
    BFP #4: 5/10/17, EDD 1/20/2018
    Baby boy born January 12, 2018, 6 lbs 3.3 oz, 20.5 in.

  • Sorry I can't tag all individuals right now, but yay for the Bfp's!! What a roller coaster this ride is.

    And I am also Sorry for the bfn's...it sucks when you had good timing and are in limbo thinking it's too early to test but the bfn still sucks :/

    @NewMommyCoop I'm sorry to hear you'll be off the board, but I admire you for thinking of the whole picture and focusing on your relationship instead of ttc sounds like it might be a good idea. That decision could not have come easy!! Hugs!! 

    Afm-pretty sure I'm 6 dpo but not planning to test since my D&c was 5 weeks ago, and I just can't be positive about if I O'd or not. I've been temping and noting cm...so we shall see. FF gave me dotted cross hairs for cd 11, which is early for me but from what I've read on this board, many women O a little early after mc so it's definitely possible! 

    Me.30 DH.31 
    Est.8.2006
    BFP 8/28/15 mmc @ 11 weeks (d&c)
    BFP 9/28/16 mmc @ 8 weeks (d&c) - trisomy 5
    BFP 2/3/17...edd 10/13/17 <3

  • @NewMommyCoop I'm sorry that you are leaving and that you and DH Are going through some rough times. I just want to say that I wish you nothing but the best and I'm sure it was not an easy decision for you to make. Good luck lady! :-)
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @NewMommyCoop I'm very sorry to see you go. I hope you and dh can heal your relationship and find happiness. hugs to you <3
    TW*** Child and loss mentioned
    Married 10/12
    DS 11/14
    Ectopic 2/16
    PCOS/Ovulation Dysfunction 11/16
    IUI x 3- BFN
    Laparoscopy 3/17 Endo and tubal damage
    IVF- 4/17- 40 eggs retrieved, 10 blasts, 7 pgs tested embryos
    FET- 6/17- BFP!
    Due Feb 15, 2017
  • @NewMommyCoop I'm sorry to see you leave. I hope you and your H can work through your issues and get back to solid ground. Hugs. <3
  • @newmommycoop so sorry to see you go, but I'm glad you are taking time to work on your relationship. I'll be thinking of you. 
  • Lots of love to you @NewMommyCoop. This has to be an incredibly tough decision. You are one strong lady. I hope you and DH can work things out <3
    DH - 34, Me - 32
    Married 7/13
    TTC #1 since 10/13
    BFP 2/4/15, MC twin boys at 18w3d 5/15
    IUI #1 2/25/16

  • @NewMommyCoop lots of hugs girl. That decision could not have come easy and I admire you greatly.
    Me: 39 DH: 39
    CP 1/25/16 4.5 weeks, developed Graves' disease
  • Lot of hugs @newmommycoop - that is such a tough decision. I wish you and DH lots of luck and we will miss you around here!
  • @NewMommyCoop Hoping everything works out for you, no matter what that ends up looking like.  Hugs.

    AFM, 11DPO and BFN after BFN.  The FRER evap lines are EVIL and I hate them.  I usually get deep painful acne a couple days before AF and my skin is clear as a milkmaid's, so I don't know what's going on.  Fun fact - did you know that milkmaids were known for having clear skin because a lot of them got cowpox, which prevented them from getting smallpox when there were outbreaks?  So no facial scarring for them.  I don't know how I know that.  I'm losing my mind over here.
  • @NewMommyCoop I am so sorry and we will miss you, but I get it. TTC is such a hard journey even for a rock solid relationship and I can't imagine if things aren't so great. My thoughts and prayers will remain with you!

    AFM: BFN today at 12DPO so I'm just waiting for AF to arrive. I hope some of you other ladies have better luck this month!
    Me: 32 DH: 36
    Married 5/08
    BFP #1: 1/27/13 DS #1 born 10/16/13
    BFP #2: 1/20/16, ectopic discovered 1/23/16
    Surgery 1/23/16 to remove ruptured tube
    TTCAL 3/16
    BFP #3: 3/24/17 EDD 12/5/17
    DS #2 born 12/11/17



  • @NewMommyCoop So sorry.  We will miss you, but like others have said, I understand.  We're always around if you want to stop back by.  Take care of yourself.

    Sorry for all the BFNs again - was hoping we'd get a few more BFPs, and maybe we still will!  Fx!
    Me: 35     DH: 37
    BFP: 1.6.16 | MC: 2.17.16
    BFP: 10.3.16 | CP: 10.11.16
    BFP: 12.14.16 | CP: 12.14.16
    BFP:  1.23.17 | EDD 10.6.17 -- DS born 10.7.17 <3
    BFP:  9.9.18 | EDD 5.23.19 -- DD born 5.24.19 <3
    BFP: 9.1.21 | MC 10.1.21
    BFP: 11.11.21 | EDD 7.24.22 

     

  • @NewMommyCoop.  So sorry you are leaving.  I imagine this was a very hard decision to make but totally agree with you that working on your relationship should be the priority.  I wish you the best of luck.  
  • Tested again this morning.  Can't wait for the wondfo's to be gone!   I will not waste $20 by POAS using a FRER. It's just so easy to waste it on the cheap ones.  Just keep thinking I'll see a line one of these days 
  • @tscalei sorry for the BFN- I do really hope it's just too early but I get what you are saying. It's like can I just know already??

    @RiverSong15 Sorry for the BFN as well- my fingers are crossed for you

    @NewMommyCoop- good luck to you and your DH and I hope that maybe stepping away from TTC will be helpful. Hugs to you, you will be missed. 

    @BornReady thanks for the info about the TTCAL grad board. I'm actually a member as I asked Mel to add me a while back so I could keep track of all you lovely ladies and show support. Based on the betas today- Hopefully I will be moving over.

    AFM: Just got back from the lab and got my beta and and progesterone and now I wait. 

     ****TW: Pregnancy, loss and children mentioned****
    Me (39) DH (40) 
    From my first marriage DD: 03/04 CP:01/06 DS:12/06 
    DH- no kids
    ******************
    TTC: since 2/15, RE Consult 9/15
    IUI #1 10/15: Letrozole = BFN 
    IUI #2 11/15: Letrozole + trigger = BFN
    1/08/16: Surprise- BFP!!  2/16/16: MMC @10w 2days,  D&C: 2/17/16
    TTCAL: May 2016
    IUI #3 5/27/16: Letrozole+trigger=BFN
    IUI #4 06/24/16: 7.5mg Letrozole+trigger= BFN
    IUI#5 08/24/16 Menopur+trigger = BFN
    IUI #6 09/19/16 5 mg Letrozole +Menopur + Trigger= BFN
    **10/2016: No more medicated cycles, TTCAL on our own**
    12/03/16: BFP!! EDD: 08/12/17 It's a girl!! 
    Eleni was born on 8/14/17!!
  • @NewMommyCoop  So sorry to see you go.  What a difficult decision you had to make.  I hope everything goes well with you and your DH.  I admire the honesty you have with yourself.  

    @TScalei & @migdala  Sorry for the BFNs.  Hoping that it is just too early.
    ***TW***
    Me: 36  DH:35
    Married: 7/10/2016
    TTC#1 - May 2016
    BFP 9/6/2016 - Missed MC 10/20/2016  
    BFP 5/5/2017  - CP
    IVF #1 - June 2017  - Transferred 1 fresh 4 AA embryo.  7/9 Beta #1 - 161 
    <3 Adam <3 Born on 3/18/18




     
  • @roxgibbons. Such great news!  Hope everything goes well and you have an uneventful 9 months 
  • @newmommycoop I sorry to see you go and good luck
  • I'm hopping over here from WTO since I got my crosshairs today- only 3 dpo. I had good timing this month, and part of me is hoping I'll get my BFP so I can have the satisfaction of cancelling my HSG appt on the 27th. But I'm getting ahead of myself  :) I won't be testing until the 16th if my temps haven't gone down so I have a ways to go. FX for everyone!!
  • 12DPO and I'm spotting and cramping.  Looks like I'm out.  This is the longest LP since the MC though, so I'm trying to look at it as a good sign.  Is 12 days still too short, though?  I used to have 14 day LPs...
  • @migdala hopefully it isn't AF! From the little bit of research that I've done, the average day of implantation is day 9. Most people say between day 6-12. It's good that your LP is getting longer and longer, but I don't know if a 12 day LP is necessarily an issue. Some people believe that late implantation might have a correlation with a "bad egg," but I don't know much about that theory. 
    Pregnancy Ticker
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