TTCAL Check-in Week of October 17

Mackey15 · October 2016

Thanks for the welcome! I hope all our stays are short but it's nice to have a supportive place to visit.

stephann85 · October 2016

@Mackey15 sorry you find yourself here but welcome.

dpjennifer · October 2016

So... did NOT go well today. Because when I went in on Monday THEIR pregnancy test turned negative, they can't count it as a miscarriage even though I'd gotten positives at home. Because it could've been a false positive, or some bullshit like that. So, even though I'm tracking and charting and had symptoms I'd only had during the last 2 times I had a PG, and the MC happened exactly like it did the last time, too bad for me. I can only 'count' 2 miscarriages to my name, instead of the 3rd I need for insurance purposes. Bull crap all around. Worse than having a miscarriage and being depressed and losing the hope of everything, is not even being able to count it to get the testing done to help in the future.
*sigh* So I've been referred to an REI, but who knows if insurance would pay for anything, since I'm not at the necessary 3 'official' miscarriages.
I'm so over this.

brooklyngirl18 · October 2016

@dpjennifer i'm so sorry! that is such crap!! please take care of yourself

TScalei · October 2016

@dpjennifer - Im sorry! But I would call your insurance company, my insurance covered my RE as a specialist visit after 2 mcs. Neither my RE's office or insurance company even asked how many mcs I had when I first made the appt. Also, I believe a regular OB could probably order RPL bloodwork. Im sorry it sucks to go through that again and then not even have it recognized for what it was.

migdala · October 2016

@dpjennifer I am so angry on your behalf! That is just wrong. The whole system is so awful. I wish there was a way you could game it and get insurance to cover everything without having to go through a fourth. The whole thing is so arbitrary and unfair!

RiverSong15 · October 2016

@dpjennifer I'm so angry for you! That's insane. Two thoughts. First, have you confirmed this with insurance yourself? My carrier covered testing after two losses, and I know at least one other carrier also covers testing after two losses. This has been changing recently, so it's possible your doctor's office might not be aware (or may just be stuck on old information). Second, have you considered finding another OB? Maybe just a consult would help, and you may be able to get more compassionate care elsewhere. If your RE can code testing as RPL, you may be able to get things covered. I'm so so incredibly sorry you have to deal with this on top of the loss.

Mackey15 · October 2016

@dpjennifer that just sucks. I'm sorry your appointment went like that and that you experienced another mc. Its wrong all around. I agree with @RiverSong15 have you thought about a different ob?

laeberge3 · October 2016

@dpjennifer That is maddening and such a slap in the face after what you've been through. I second the others who suggested checking with your carrier. Thinking of you

SoonToBeMommaHowe · October 2016

So sorry @dpjennifer. This process is so cruel sometimes. Thinking of you

ladipale · October 2016

I'm so sorry @dpjennifer - that is so disheartening. I agree with others, I *think* they changed the recommendation to 2 losses if you haven't had a successful pregnancy before they do testing. but that is brutal that they won't count it

dpjennifer · October 2016

Thank you all for the support. I was definitely devastated, but was referred to a REI. Got an appointment set up for the 31st and will see what they say. Hopefully they can get some testing done through the insurance, but I won't know much until then. I think I'm going to take a hiatus from all things TTCAL until after that appointment (on advice of my therapist - I'm trying to relax and mentally deal with all of this better). So I will see you all in a week or so!

NewMommyCoop · October 2016

@dpjennifer Best of luck with your appointment. I am glad they were able to get you in and I hope you get the answers you need. Take care of yourself.

szwill86 · October 2016

@dpjennifer glad you were able to get an appointment so soon! GL for the appt and take all the time you need for your break from all things TTCAL.

RiverSong15 · October 2016

@dpjennifer GL with your appointment and I hope the hiatus helps you a lot. You know if you ever have questions, we'll be here, either on the board or via PM.

pghren · October 2016

@justsuzie well were here for you

hopefully we can help deal with the festering irl

SP128 · October 2016

1.) Introduce yourself (if you're new) Hi all. DH and I just got married in July and this was my first pregnancy. I was diagnosed with a mmc last Thursday. I knew since Oct 6 that things weren't measuring right. I took miso Friday afternoon. It seems like from the other people's experiences, my experience was uneventful. Mild cramping and very little bleeding. I have an apt tomorrow with my doctor and to have an u/s to make sure everything is clear. Fingers crossed.

2.) Status (WTO, TWW, Benched, etc) I am still finishing up on the mc. Hopefully AF arrives soon and I can participate in WTO and TWW. Also hoping that my levels drop quickly. Nurse practitioner said no need to wait so we are going to TTC as soon as the doctor says everything looks good again.

3.) Rants/ Raves I agree with people that others can be so insensitive. I believe that people may not totally "get it" unless they have been through a mc themselves. I second the medical staffs' desensitization to everything. During my first u/s when I found out that I was measuring off the tech simply said, "You may not see an embryo because you may have mc and your body just absorbed it." Awesome. That's what I needed to hear. I have been asked a few times at the doc's office if my pregnancy was planned.

I do have to rave about this community even though it stinks that we are in it. I have only told 3 people so the support from this community has been really nice when I feel so alone.

4.) GTKY: Tell me about your hometown. Do you still live where you grew up? Did you move a lot as a kid? Are you from a small town, suburb,city? Do you miss or are you glad you're gone?

I am from a suburb of Boston. I have read the other posts and it looks like there are definitely some other Bostonians representing : ) I do not live where I grew up. I moved 45 minutes away for about 10 years and then ended up getting a job in my hometown. I made the move back to be closer. I still work in my hometown but live in the next town over.

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